The Starts with a Kiss Series
by IlovetowriteSMP
Summary: Sexy short stories. Latest story: Jason lusts after Alexis when she becomes his lawyer.
1. An Unequal Attraction, Clic

1

An Unequal Attraction

Clic, AU, Mature.

He watches her place her hand on Sonny's thigh, as they sit at the bar in the hotel. He hasn't seen her in over a decade and a half. But its all still there. The sharp jolt of awareness in his gut at the sight of her, the twisting of his heart in the most brutal way. Its not a lovely fairytale moment, him seeing this woman he made his world around before. But then again...for him...what has ever been a fairytale?

Ric Lansing does not pretend to fully understand how his mind works. On a normal day it is cacophony of noisy screaming pain, grief, revenge fantasies, excuses and justifications. But one thing he does think he has figured out is why he has the capacity to love her and hate her with greater intensity that he does anyone else on the planet.

Because Claudia Zacchara was his first taste of love, loss and rage. It sets her apart in his head.

_Her hand slides his zipper down. He sucks in shaky breath after shaky breath. She takes him into her hands. She knows how to do everything and he knows nothing. It is sort of awkward for him but he won't stop her. He can't even pretend he is more experienced because to fake anything would require being able to think and he simply can not think in this moment. _

_They have only known each other for a few months, even though his father has worked for hers most of their young lives. They have been purposefully kept apart. Could it be their fathers suspected this would happen? Like a match and gasoline, Ric and Claudia could not be in the same room without combustion taking place._

_His eyes drift close while she moves her hand up and down his shaft. He bites his bottom lip, till he draws blood, and doesn't care about the pain at all, or how his ass is resting on the hard metal edge of a chair in his pool house. His whole world is centered on the sensations she is causing with her hands. It feels like a gift she is giving him...it doesn't feel dirty to him...but then again it is a secret and they aren't a couple. They aren't dating. He loves her...because she is her...she's too amazing to not love. He doubts she even likes him. She likes to shock her Daddy. Screwing the help's son is shocking. Ric thinks he is Claudia's pawn but it just feels too good to care. _

His eyes darken with anger at the thought of her touching his brother.

So many times Ric has been powerless in his life. He's had to settle for whatever was offered him...by Sonny, by Alexis, by his mother, his father. He's sick of settling. He's sick of losing. He's sick of being second. If anyone- and he means anyone- takes what he wants again, that's it.

Going postal should have been a term invented for Richard Lansing. But he could always give it new meaning.

He heads across the bar and clears his throat once he gets behind them. "Watch out for that guy," his voice is light, he wears a smile, but underneath there is a beast waiting to be unleashed, should his warning not be heeded. "He's nothing but trouble."

Sonny turns to face him first, while Claudia simply straightens, brushing her hair away from her face with her hands, and in all her moments Ric can tell she remembers his voice. She knows who is standing behind her and she's trying to prepare herself to face him. That gives him a little comfort. He gets under her skin, does he? Well, that's fair. And so rarely is anything in his world fair.

Sonny chuckles. "Don't listen to my brother. He's always hated me."

Claudia turns her head enough to look at Sonny. "Is that right? Why's that?"

Sonny grins, that grin Ric hates and yet he works day and night to see it because he is just a little demented and that grin is supposedly what will cure him. "Isn't it obvious? I got all the good looks in the family."

Claudia finally, ever so slowly, turns and meets Ric's eyes. It's a like lightening strikes in that dark hotel bar, at least for him. His chest expands till its hard to breath, think, know anything. Damn. She's always done this to him. Made him lose his cool. He's older now and it should be different but it isn't.

She scrunches her nose and gives him a little wave. "Hey there, you."

"Hey you."

Sonny looks between them. He motions and asks "You two know each other?"

"Nope," Claudia says quickly. "Unless your brother has an interest in couture fashion and was at the shows in Milan last year?"

Ric says "Fraid not."

Sonny shakes his head. Sometimes Ric thinks his brother is unintelligent, the truth is he is just uneducated, but he's certainly street smart. He knows when something don't smell right. "Ric, I gotta cut out on our meeting. Call me in morning."

"Something come up?" Ric asks.

"Just feel like getting home to the wife and kids." With a devious smile, Sonny winks at Claudia. "I'm a family man, you know?"

She says "I just bet you are."

He pats Ric on the shoulder and takes off. Ric sits next to Claudia at the bar. He orders a drink, and waits for the bartender to pour his scotch and soda before he says anything to her. "Miss me?"

His eyes slide to the side to see a huge smile curve over her lips.

"Not as much as you missed me," she answers.

And that is true, he's sure.

Maybe he craves her and despises her and would bleed for her gladly- even if she was the one who made him bleed he would smile and find it fitting- because they are soulmates. Or maybe it is all just because she was the first one who wrecked him, and like a baby aches for the comfort of the womb, Ric will always feel most comfortable when it is Claudia who reaching into his chest and tearing his soul to shreds.

She did it once. Left for Italy at eighteen and though she could have came back she never did. And when he went there, with his heart in his hands and a ring in his pocket, he found her in the bed of another man, her eyes unrepentant, like he should have expected no better from her or life.

She will do it again. He wants her to. Cause Ric Lansing has never felt more alive than when he is being played by Claudia Zacchara.

**THE END**


	2. Sexy, Can I? Jaudia

**RATED MATURE**

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part One**

**Last week in October 2007**

"What the fuck are you doing in my office?" Jason asks, his tone low and harsh.

Not only is he pissed off about finding a stranger sitting behind his desk but he's also pissed off that she's just about the sexiest woman he's ever seen... or damn close to, at least.He doesn't need anyone as hot as her crossing his path. Making him want everything he can never allow himself to have again. He realizes as soon as he sees her, that trouble has just walked into his world.

His body grows hard the second their eyes meet. Her dark brown ones holding his steady, warning him from the word _go_ that she's a force to be reckoned with. A smile plays on her lips but her eyes are hard as bullets. Everything about her screams _Bend me over and take me from behind._

The seventeen months he's gone without sex might also have something to do with Jason thinking that.

What a wake up call this chick is, not just for his day- which started off with Milo stuttering something nonsensical as Jason walked past him in the coffee shop and then Jason finding this sexy stranger sitting behind his desk- this woman is also a wake up call for his dick.

As soon as Jason walked into his office, she turned around in his chair and flashed him a wide smile.

He now notices what must be her black coat thrown over the chair closest to him, she's poured into a red dress that couldn't be any tighter...in fact she should probably be arrested for the way her hardened nipples are visible through the fabric. She looks rich as hell with a diamond bracelet on her wrist and diamond drop earrings in her ears. If he met her in a bar five years back, he would have taken her home in a heartbeat. Before she could even finish her drink, he'd be saying _You like motorcycles? _

He's never been much of a talker, but he's never had to say a lot in order to get a woman interested.

But this isn't five years ago, in that small window of time before Courtney, but after he was healed enough from Carly to think it sounded like a good idea to just screw whoever looked good whenever he wanted. Without letting anyone know he'd ever been with her...without them becoming a thing.

He used to tell the truth back then. _I'm not looking for love._

Then life got complicated. He learned to become a good liar. Telling Sam how he would love her forever, marry her, have a baby with her...telling Carly lies about Lila being his. He had lied even to himself. Let himself believe him and Sam could make it when his lifestyle meant he could never be anyone's husband but he said _Marry me _to her and gave her hope that he later crushed...he was lying to himself more than half the time back then so how could Carly or Sam have guessed the truth? Jason didn't even realize how much of it had been nothing more than bullshit fairytales until later.

Things were easier now. The moment Sam got shot Jason knew he could never again love another woman. He also wouldn't sleep with any...though that was harder to accept...because _just sex_ led to love once for him, and who's to say history will not repeat itself.

Better to not risk it.

That's why he really does not need a chick this hot cruising into the middle of his world, messing up his work day, and smiling at him as she sits in his chair in his god dang office where he pays gaurds to keep people like her out.

Jason is just about to repeat _What the fuck are you doing in my office_? when she licks her lips, looks him up and down and says "The reports of your stunning good looks have greatly underestimated the truth. I must get better spies."

So much for getting a straight answer out of her.

"Get out of my chair," Jason says and then calls over his shoulder, while never taking his eyes off her, "Giambetti!"

"Yes, Mr. Morgan..." Milo says, meekly, from the door.

"Who'd you let in my office?"

The woman tells Milo "That's all right, honey. I'll do my own introductions."

Jason motions for Milo to get the hell out. Milo closes the door just as the sexy stranger slowly rises to her feet.

He swallows hard as he gets an even better look at her body. Her curves are enough to make a grown man cry. Sticking out her hand, she says "Claudia Zacchara. We're sworn enemies. Nice to meet you."

_Fuck_, Jason thinks,_ This is just what I don't need right now._ He glances down at her hand, not shaking it, but checking for a ring. There isn't one.

_Great_, he thinks, _fucking great._..._she better have a man at home cause if not_... and then says "Don't show up in my office again uninvited."

"Well aren't we off to a charming start? How are we supposed to work together if you keep up this bad attitude?"

She walks out from behind the desk, and Jason can't stop himself from looking all the way down her body. Fantastic ass...even better from this view...on top of gorgeous legs...leading down to a pair of red stiletto heels that would look so good resting on his shoulders.

From the first day he heard the Zaccharas wanted to make a move on the Corinthos territory, Jason Morgan has been in a seriously bad mood. It just got a whole lot worse. Because the last thing he needs in his life is to have a hard on for a mob rival's hot as hell daughter.

But by the looks of Claudia, there is not much else he is gonna be able to do. He's gonna have to work on not thinking about this chick too much. Jason doesn't dare let her crawl up under his skin, she'd be an itch he had to scratch over and over again.

_(If you start me up  
If you start me up I'll never stop _

_  
If you start me up  
If you start me up I'll never stop _

_  
I've been running hot  
You got me ticking_

_Gonna blow my top _

_  
If you start me up  
If you start me up I'll never stop _

_You make a grown man cry..._

_You, you, you _

_make a grown man cry _

_  
You, you _

_make a dead man come_

_  
You, you_

_make a dead man come)_ ( Rolling Stones)

XXXXXX

_Very, very nice_, she thinks as she walks closer to Jason Morgan.

The pictures she had of him showed he was hot but not _smoking, make you wanna drop your panties, and scream his name_ hot. Yet he was. His eyes alone were enough to get her body humming.

To say she liked sex would be like saying she liked red shoes, chocolate, or bourbon straight up. All were addictions for her and she long ago gave up on fighting to break any of them. Sex was definitely her worst one. Right now she wasn't able to feed her habit- since she had moved from Milan only last week she was most decidedly single.

Too bad Jason couldn't be her next fling.

_Its truly a damn shame he works for Corinthos_, she thinks, _If Morgan was my enforcer...he could watch my back and my front and we'd have one hell of a time running Port Charles together. Daddy can have Crimson Pointe. The real goldmine are the docks located in this town_.

While Claudia is admiring Jason's well muscled body, in his leather coat and jeans, he is giving her a look that says _Go somewhere and die. _

It has the exact opposite effect on her than he intends though because Jason's harsh, take no prisoners, manner does not make her quake in her lacy panties, it makes her quiver and think about what it would feel like it he took her hard and fast. Maybe on his desk, against the wall, on the floor...she likes it rough and Morgan looks like a real roughneck to her.

"We're not working together," Jason tells her.

"You haven't even listened to my proposal."

"I don't have to." He lets outs a frustrated breath.

She notices he has really nice lips. They set in a firm line when he's angry, like right now, making them even sexier to her. She wonders what he looks like when he smiles. Probably even better...probably good enough to swallow whole.


	3. part 2, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Two**

**Note- definition of garment rending: to tear one's clothes in rage or grief.**

**Last week in October 2007**

She extends her hand out to Jason Morgan."Claudia Zacchara. We're sworn enemies. Nice to meet you."

"Don't show up in my office again uninvited."

"Well aren't we off to a charming start? How are we supposed to work together if you keep up this bad attitude?"

"We're not working together."

"You haven't even listened to my proposal."

"I don't have to." He lets outs a frustrated breath.

_Damn, nice lips, _she thinks.

Too bad its gonna be a bitch to work with him. His completely hostile attitude from_ jump_ is disappointing to say the least.

_Isn't this just freaking lovely?_ she thinks _He should be a blast to work with. Not only do I have to stop thinking about screwing him, I also get to put up with him being cold and uncompromising too...fun._

"You'd be a fool," Claudia says "to not see how an alliance between our families would make all of us a hell of a lot richer and safer. Think about it...instead of wondering when you'll turn a corner and see me pointing a gun right between your eyes...we can be on the same side in a mutually beneficial relationship. Hell, you might even find out you like spending time with me. From what I've seen, there's not a man alive who doesn't."

Jason pinches his nose.

Claudia smiles, finding the frustrated gesture cute. _Better not tell him that,_ she thinks. He probably wouldn't take it well. He wants to look like a hard ass...and he does...but she's not the type to be easily intimidated.

"We're not working together. You got nothing to offer me that I want."

She reaches out and places one manicured painted red fingernail against his cheek. "Now that's not hardly true."

Jason steps away from her, shaking his head angrily and shooting her a dirty look for touching him. He walks behind the desk, throws out his hands in a _Fine, I'll humor you gesture _and says "Just tell me what you have in mind so I can tell you no and you can leave. And don't let me catch you back in here without being invited or else."

"If this is the way you treat all your business associates then no wonder you are always in a mob war. Here's some advice for you, Morgan." Her tone is sweet when she suggests "Why don't you try a little more honey and a little less of the menacing glares. You'd catch more flies that way. You know what you and Sonny really need around here? A woman's touch. The all boys' club is so last millennium. All balls to the wall, let the bodies hit the floor."

Placing her hands on the desk she leans closer to him and continues "When if you would just make a few well negotiated deals instead you could keep your bullets_ in your gun _till you really need to use them." She smiles and winks. "Not that I have any moral objections to murder. Even God knows it's a necessary evil in this lifestyle. But it gets so messy. And I do hate having to replace my shoes afterwards. I've lost more Monola Blahniks to blood stains than I can even count."

"Yeah? You think the cops would be interested in hearing that?"

"You a rat, Morgan?"

He simply stares at her.

Claudia smiles again. "We both know that's just not the kind of man you are. You're the silent type. You'll take your secrets to your grave, I'm sure. You'd never have made it this long in this business or risen so high in this organization if you were anyway but that way. I've heard you're more than just the brawn around here...you're the true brains. That's why I'm here talking to you instead of Corinthos. He's too hot headed, just like my Daddy. The very last thing I want to do is deal with another emotional, garment rendering man. I came up in this business under my Uncle Rudy and he's nothing like that. He's cool under fire, and taught me to be the same."

"Talk business or leave." He lets out a long breath and then sits down.

Claudia walks around the desk, and sits on the edge of it, next to Jason. She crosses her legs. "That's what I'm doing."

XXXXXXXXXXX

He watches as she crossed her legs. Creamy white thigh peeks out beneath her tight red dress. Jason jerks his eyes away. "You're talking about Sonny...who you don't know. Me...who you think you understand after meeting two minutes ago."

"Better than you'd like to admit, Morgan. I've researched you and you're not that complicated."

Jason goes on like she hadn't even spoken, in his annoyed, _get on with this _tone. "And your Uncle Rudy- who I could give two shits about."

They stare at each other for a long moment. Jason adds "If you came here to make friends, just go now...cause I don't need anymore friends. Sonny runs this territory and he's not looking to work with another family."

"He needs to reconsider that."

Jason raises on eyebrow to silently ask _Why? That might benefit you. How does it benefit us?_

Claudia went on "You're spent the last three years fighting off Alcazar and almost served a life sentence for your trouble. You don't want to start another war...because this time you'd be up against the _Zaccharas_. We aren't some South American, old world code, _don't bring the women and children into this _sort of clan. I'm sure you know there is no limit to what my father will do to get what he wants and what he wants most this week is...everything you have."

"That a threat from him?"

"I don't speak for him, no. I speak for me. I'm here to ask you to make an end run around the Bosses in charge with me. Now...tell me...doesn't that sound like fun?"Claudia's eyes shine with unmasked sensual teasing. "You work your end. I'll work mine. We'll meet in the middle and both end up satisfied."

He hates to admit it, and he would never say this out loud, but _Damn, if that don't sound like a good idea._

He'd like nothing more than to get the chance to fuck this woman.

She could work out a lot of the tension clinging to his bones.The way she's coming on to him, with her little double entendres, says she'd be game for it if Jason made a move. Not that he's going to because fucking an enemy is reckless as hell and he's only been reckless a couple of times in his life. It takes a lot to make him go there...a blonde he can't walk away from, a moment he can't quite resist...and its been years since he let his dick do the talking for him. Even with Sam, as much as he wanted her body from day one, he didn't have her till he was sure there was something more other than just attraction between them.

Not till this moment does Jason really regret that he isn't into casual sex anymore. It's a damn shame to let a chick as hot as Claudia walk away without, at least, setting something up for later...he has a pass key to the Metro Court. He can have any room he wants, any time he wants.

He stands up and heads toward the door, opens it and then says "Time for you to go."

She walks towards him, without grabbing her coat and purse he notices, stopping right when she is close to his body. In a quiet tone, so no one outside can hear, she says "We haven't talked specifics. You gonna turn me down without even knowing what you are turning down?"

Just then Sonny came walking up to the doorway. He gave Claudia a long look up and down and smiled. "Good morning...how _you_ doing?"

She smiles. Jason watches as she turns on the charm for him. He don't like it one bit.

Claudia says "Hello, there. I've been looking forward to meeting the man-in-charge."

"Have you?" Sonny flirts. "I didn't know Jason had a new...friend...in his life. You holding out on me, man? You always try to keep the most beautiful ones hidden in that penthouse of yours...but I always end up meeting them anyway, don't I?"

Jason seethes. Who the hell is he talking about? Carly? He need not even go there unless he wants to be knocked out. But Sonny never thinks straight when a chick is around.

He sticks out his hand. "Sonny Corinthos...but I bet you already knew that, sweets."

Claudia takes his hand, slowly wrapping her fingers around his, leans in and kisses both his cheeks.

"Damn you smell great," Sonny says.

Jason shakes his head at the scene before him. Sonny is damn near engaged to Kate. Fucking bastard. He enjoys bursting Sonny's bubble. "Meet Claudia Zacchara- Anthony's firstborn."

Sonny blanches, then his eyes harden. "He send you here?"

"No. But I figured a first meet was in order," Claudia said. "So you know I'm interested in being friendly...or that I can be the worst foe you boys have ever come up against. The thing that goes bump in the night...that will be me...if anything should happen to my brother, John. But I don't see why it should. There's enough money to go round. We could strike a deal for usage on your docks and all end up happy._ Play ball _with me, Sonny...the life you save could be your own."

"No deal," Sonny says. He brushes past her and heads for the desk. "Now get out of here."

Claudia gives Jason a look that says _You could make this so much easier on yourself_. He simply stares back at her saying _Forget about it._

Jason can so tell she is the type to go down swinging. That's always been his favorite type.

For now, she leaves it go, grabbing her purse and coat and saying "Sleep on it. We'll talk again...you both better count on that," before she leaves.

She'll be back. He's sure of that. He hates the fact that he actually wants to see her again...though if he never does...it will be so much easier on him. Because Claudia looks way too good to not think about fucking her every time he lays on her.

He don't need that kind of temptation in his life.

XXXXXXXXX

Later that night, Jason is drinking a beer at the Metro Court bar. He's just gotten done talking to his best friend...playfully arguing about if he will be taking her to the Black and White Ball since her husband is out of town. Carly had to make an oversees phone call in her office, so she left Jason at the bar. Jason figures he'll finish his beer and then take off.

He hears the bartender let out a low, soft whistle and mutter "Damn, look at her."

Right then Jason has a pretty good idea who he will see when he turns around. The woman who has been stuck in his head all day, he's fighting off fantasies of her left and right. Turning his head slowly, she comes into view.

Claudia has just stepped off the elevator and her eyes are searching the room. They connect with Jason's. He thinks to himself _Get up and walk out. Don't speak to her...you'll only want to take her to bed if you do._

He wonders what she would say if he asked...and just how rough she likes it.

(_ "Sexy, can I_

_hit it from the front  
then I hit it from the back?"_

_  
Know you like it like that._

_  
Then we take it to the bed, _

_then we take it to the floor  
Then we chill for a second_

_then we're back at it for more..._

_Baby,_

_when we make love it's like "Oh, ohh, ohhhhhhhhhh"_

_  
I don't know what your man is like. _

_But shorty all I want to know is  
"Sexy, can I?"_

"_Sexy, can I..._.) (Ray J)


	4. part 3, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Three**

**Last week in October 2007**

Claudia steps off the elevator at The Metro Court and her eyes search the room for Dara Jensen. She needs a lawyer on retainer for the inevitable day when she gets pulled into the PCPD just for being Anthony Zacchara's daughter. There's no way in hell she will use her one phone call to call that pervert Trevor Lansing. She'd rather rot behind bars till menopause.

She found herself a female lawyer because she doesn't trust very many men. Only Uncle Rudy and John. All the rest she considers either out to destroy her in some way- the hitman who have tried to kill her in Milan, the other mobsters who think they can steam roll over her cause she's a _just a girl_, and all the men who are sexual deviants...she has the bad luck to bump into them way too often.

Or, if they don't want to destroy her, they are just good for a quick screw and then she moves on.

She had a voracious sexual appetite, and a dislike for long term relationships, so she's always on the prowl for a new man to be her lover. Six months tops is all she can stand with even the best of them. Most never make it that long.

Her eyes land on Jason Morgan, who is sitting at the hotel bar, and she thinks _He could have been a contender._

But the way he was rude to her earlier left a bad taste in her mouth. _Hell with him_, she thinks. Giving him a cold stare she goes and joins Dara at her table.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason does not let his eyes wander from Claudia after spotting her by the elevator. Business wise, its smart to not turn his back on his enemy...he might end up with a bullet in him...but its not really business interests that keep his eyes locked on her. She just looks too hot for him to think about looking away.

Its not like he has not known hot chicks before. Hell, he's been in love with and loved by more than one beautiful woman. But Claudia isn't just beautiful. She's also deadly. She might even want to kill him. It makes the idea of sleeping with her that much hotter.

_What would she'd do ...if I passed her a hotel key card_? he wonders, not really planning to go through with it but it's an idea, that's for sure.

Before she walks away from the elevator, Claudia's eyes meet his and fill with ice cold anger.

_She looks even hotter when she's pissed off,_ Jason thinks to himself, _Does this chick have a bad look?_

He ain't seen one yet.

Jason grabs his beer and takes another swig, while he watches Claudia talk to Dara Jensen.

_Knock. Knock._

_Jason opens the door, wearing jeans but no shirt. He's holding a bottle of beer in his hand. Their eyes meet as she walks inside. _

_The look she gives him is pure fire. This chick is not nervous to be here. She's ready for this...for him...for anything, everything. He grows hard as he realizes he probably won't even have to make small talk with her._

_Claudia grabs the beer bottle out of his hand, taking a swig, then a disgusted expression quickly passes over her face. "Switch to bourbon. Its what grown ups drink_."

"_You want bourbon. There's the phone. Call room service."_

_She starts to shrugs out of her coat. He walks closer to her and helps her take it off, tossing it aside, but staying right behind her. Her skin smells like vanilla and cigarettes. Sinful, innocent._

_Jason places both his hands on her arms, pressing himself close to her, he lets her feel proof of how bad he wants her. "You didn't spend much time thinking about coming up here." _

_He had left the key on her table, came to this room, opened a beer, peeled off his shirt, threw some condoms on the bedside table and then she was at the door._

"_When I want something," Claudia says "I don't think about it..." She spins around and takes hold of his face. "I just take it." _

_Her lips collide with his. She's so much softer than he imagined. For some reason he thought she'd kiss him roughly- bite and suck right away, demand he keep pace with her, try to run the show- but she doesn't. The first kiss is quick and intense, then she pulls back a little and looks in his eyes. Hers dart back and forth...he wonders what kind of secrets she's keeping in that pretty head of hers. A second later, she's back to kissing him again...slowly she makes love to his mouth._

_Claudia's fingers grab the waistband of his jeans, tugging him even closer, before she pulls back. "No promises."_

"_You won't hear me make any."_

"_Good."_

_After that everything happens fast. Jason dips his head and devours her lips, nibbling on the bottom one. Then he kisses her deeply, lifting her off her feet, so she can wrap her legs around his back. He takes the few steps over to the bed and sets her down on it. She looks up at him, wearing that sexy red dress that he's completely in love with, and smirks "Don't be gentle."_

"_No problem."_

_He fucks her while she leaves her red heels on._

"Jase?"

He snaps out of his fantasy when he hears Carly voice behind him. Her catching him is all the cold water he needs. He shouldn't be thinking about Claudia anyway.

Hell, life was so much simpler back when he couldn't imagine anything that wasn't real. He couldn't fantasy then. He couldn't ache for what he would never have.

He'd be better off if he had never redeveloped the ability to dream, to see images that had never been or would never be, to feel what it was like to be with someone he would never be with in reality.

Jason turns his head to look at Carly. "Hey."

Her eyes move to Claudia. He realizes he was staring at her, pretending to be keeping an eye on a mob rival for his job, and Carly had noticed. He tells her "That's Claudia Zacchara. She just moved back home."

"You think she's here to make trouble for us?"

"I won't let her. Don't worry about it."

He would do whatever it took to keep all the Zacchara's from messing with anyone Jason cares about. They mess with the Corinthos territory or Jason's family and he will be the bad day they never see coming. But it is only Claudia that presents a threat back to him.

A threat to his sanity if he can't stop imagining her naked.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Claudia actually lets out a sigh when Jason finally stops staring at her. She tried to ignore how his eyes were stuck on her, as she talked to Dara, but there was not a second that passed when she didn't feel like Jason was actually touching her skin, rather than looking at her from across the room.

_I can't let him get to me,_ she tells herself, _He's attractive, yeah. But I've banged my share of attractive men before. He ain't special._

Still Jason Morgan was rapidly taking over her thoughts. All day today she found herself pissed off that he hadn't even tried to listen to her business proposal. He messed up big time by not seeing it would be his good fortune to avoid a mob war and team up with her.

They could make one bad ass team. It would be too damn hot for words to kiss him...all that deadly and dangerous muscle pressed close to her. To get rich, happy and keep the blood from flowing in the streets all at the same time. What was not to like about that idea?

He'll change his mind soon. See reason. Claudia will give him no choice.

_I'll make a deal with him about those damn docks if it's the last thing I do_, she thinks,_ and my reward to myself afterwards will be one night spent screwing his brains out...if he drops the bad attitude...He's hot enough to make me almost not care if he's a little bit of an asshole...almost. I bet if I offered him me...that would be one deal he wouldn't have to think twice about taking._

Dara says "I'll change you quadruple if I have to get out of bed after midnight, just so you know. I have a husband and kids...I'm only representing you because the economy has tanked my private practice. I've never enjoyed dealing with the organized crime element in this city but every person deserves the best lawyer they can get, and I've been the best since before Alexis Davis, Diane Miller or Ric Lansing ever even heardof Port Charles."

"What about Trevors? You better than him, too?"

"I'm sorry. Who?"

"Trevor Lansing, my father's attorney since I was a little girl."

"I've gone against him several times in the last few months, in civil matters. He was trying to dispute a bill your father owed a construction company. He lost. Had to pay my fees too."

"Good. Make sure he loses every time and we'll get along just fine."

Claudia notices that Jason has stopped talking to Carly Jacks, who she researched when she looked into the Corinthos organization, and now Jason is looking at her again. Carly wanders over to speak to a tall blonde man that Claudia knows is her husband. She's gone over her file on all of them, front to back. She knows more than they could imagine.

Her eyes lock in on Jason's. Dara looks over her shoulder and sees him. "Do you know Mr. Morgan?"

"Met him once. Hey, tell me something, would you? What's your read on him?"

"He's the most dangerous man in this city."

_Really?_ Claudia thinks _Well, the most dangerous woman has just shown up...he better make room for me._

Ten minutes later, her meeting with Dara ends and Claudia heads to the elevator. She steps on and when she turns around, she sees Jason Morgan is crossing the room and headed straight for her. The doors start to close. She lets them.

At the last minute, his hand slides out and stops them, then Jason steps onto the elevator. He looks at her but doesn't say a word.

_The intense way he looks at her, as he comes toward her, causes her to step back. Just when she hits the wall, Jason's mouth crashes into Claudia's. Both his hands close around her wrists and force her arms above her head. The kisses he gives her leave no room for questions about what he wants...her...and when he wants it...now._

_Her body immediately reacts to the sensual, open mouth kisses he is giving her, as she becomes wet, at the same time a tingling sensation shoots through every part of her. His hand moves up to massage her breast through the material of her dress. He's doesn't start off gentle...she's glad about that. He twists the already rock hard pebble of her nipple, causing her to moan into his mouth._

_Jason breaks their kiss and Claudia could kill him. She doesn't want to stop for even one second._

_He steps back a little, and glances up. She spots a camera._

_Grabbing a fist full of his black t-shirt she drags him back to her, kissing him hard and fast, as her arms wound around his neck. _

_Ding._

_The doors open._

_They break apart and look into the hall but no one is there. Claudia goes to press the _close doors _and_ stop_ buttons, but Jason says "Lets get a room."_

_He points up at the camera. She presses the buttons and says "Lets not."_

_Then she pushes him up against the wall. Claudia is in charge here. She'll take what she wants. Make him her slave. He will beg for mercy before she is through. Anyone who needs to get to a different floor in this hotel better take the stairs cause this elevator will be stuck between floors for a while._

_She likes it fast. But once is never enough._

Claudia looks at Jason, who stands next to her in the elevator, and refuses to say a word to him. She'll just go and get something he wants...another dock, a warehouse, a pier, a permit inspector in her back pocket...and then she'll make him another offer.

He better be smart enough to take it. For all their sake. She thinks Sonny is a loose cannon. Her father is a candidate for a lobotomy. She has to be the one to protect Johnny. Once she is sure a truce is in place, and that she can run her illegal drugs through Port Charles unchallenged- thereby insuring she doesn't need her Daddy's money- then and only then will she _think_ about forgiving Jason his rudeness...and making him her nextpart-time lover.

Cause Claudia ain't looking for no full time thing.


	5. part 4, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Four- **

**Last week in October 2007**

Jason doesn't know what the hell it is about this woman that makes him act nuts. He spotted Claudia

heading for the elevator at the Metro Court, swinging those sexy hips of hers, in that sexy dress of hers, moving that sexy ass of hers...and he jumped up and hurried after her. Just to stand next to her in the elevator and not say a word.

Fucking ridiculous.

He really needed to look into her background more. He had Spinelli doing his Jackal thing all day on Claudia, but it never came up that she's a voodoo priestess. So how does she make him jump?

_I've always been able to resist chicks I need to_, he thinks

But that is a lie. A major lie. And Claudia is looking a lot like the next woman Jason will not be able to resist.

The elevator jerks and then stops.

"Un-fucking-believable," Claudia hisses out.

Jason takes out his phone and calls the front desk. When he hangs up, he says, looking straight ahead "It'll be a while."

They stand there in silence for another minute.

_Without saying a word, she steps in front of him, her eyes burning with hunger. She shimmies out of her dress, letting it pool around her feet, to reveal a black bra and thong. Jason nearly swallows his own tongue as he gulps in response to her unsnapping the front clasp of her bra._

_She lets it fall to the ground. Jason's eyes focus on her perfectly formed breasts, and his mouth waters._

_He reaches for Claudia but she holds up a hand to tell him to stay back. Jason raises an eyebrow at her._

_She walks closer and whispers "You may not touch me."_

_Then she starts kissing his neck, his jaw, his earlobe, but not his lips. At the same time she unbuckles his belt and pants. She places one more kiss on his throat, as Jason fights hard to keep his hands from caressing her, then Claudia steps back and yanks down his pants._

_She looks up at him. Dark, devious eyes hit his. Damn...she's fine. He grips the railing behind him in the elevator, to keep from touching her._

_Straightening again, Claudia now brings her hands to the bottom of his shirt and works to push it up, while kissing every place she exposes. Jason rips his shirt off. She kisses his nipples, sucks and bites on them._

_He's dying. This is heaven. Death isn't something to fear, after all. He's really digging it. Should have died sooner, in fact._

_Or maybe this is hell...cause Claudia is no angel. Hell kicks ass. Best spot in the universe if Claudia's hands on his body is any indication of just how good it is here...in this place that doesn't exist...but he wants to stay forever._

_Nothing in the real world counts here. He is not the man who has all these responsibilities, regrets and the permanently broken heart. He's just the one that Claudia is stroking into ecstasy. _

_Everyone needs a little time out of time. He wants to spend all of his with Claudia. Her lips finally meet his, her tongue sweeping through his mouth in an ruthless assault. Jason raises his hands to run them into her hair._

_She bites his lips. "I said don't touch me. I'm off limits for you, buddy."_

_Claudia smirks as she drops to her knees, then draws him into her mouth_

_Oh my, suck me...suck me...yes..._

He glances over at her, she's glancing at him. Their eyes hold. He wonders if his are filled with lust. Can she tell he's hard as hell right now? He angels his body away from her and messes with the buttons on the panel- like that will make the elevator magically start moving and get him out of this closed in space with the hottest chick he will never be able to kiss.

Claudia asks "You planning to apologize to me any time soon, Morgan? I'm waiting."

"For what? You broke into my office, not the other way around."

"You think its smart to show such disrespect? Throw me out without even hearing my proposal. You're supposed to be the smart one. Maybe my intel was wrong."

"You make moves into our territory and then try to force us into a deal. And you wonder why it didn't work? Come on...you had to know you'd get turned down. There's too much bad blood between the families to be partners in anything...even one deal."

"Its partners together or mourners together. You choose."

"Your family stays the hell in Crimson Point. That's my choice."

"Sorry. That wasn't an option." Claudia yanks out her gun. Jason spins around and pushes her against the wall.

His hand covers the gun. "What the fuck do you think you're doing? Are you crazy?"

"You're my worst enemy. I'd be crazy to not take the shot if I had it."

His body brushes against hers. If he was hard before, he's harder now. She's complete torture to be around. "And let the doors open and everyone see my dead body laying at your feet?"

"You attacked me first. There was a struggle. It was self defense."

"The camera in here will say otherwise."

"Videos disappear all the time. I'll chance it." Their eyes are inches apart, as our their lips, their ragged breaths mingle. Jason wonders if she even knows how turned on his is right now.

She might be crazy...but its in a way that hot as blazes. He doesn't believe for a second she was gonna shoot him. It wouldn't be a smart play, and this chick is definitely a game player of the first freaking degree. She just wanted to get him wound up, and she accomplished her goal.

He grabs her gun and takes a step back. "Don't be reckless. You want to keep the peace then stop coming at us. Let the tensions dies down. Wait. Be patient."

"Be a quiet, good little girl, huh? I'm a Zacchara. When all the other babies were born innocent and smelling like sweetness...I was born dirty, mad, mean and with my hand out...asking when I'm gonna get mine. And I will get mine, Morgan, even if it means stealing it from you. Why not make this so much easier on all of us and just share? Give me access to your docks and I'll give you access to our suppliers. You'll cut costs. I'll move my shipments. We will both get rich as fuck and nobody loses. Take that deal to Sonny and tell him...he accepts or he better tell his men to go out and buy black suits cause they will need them to be buried in."

"You know the problem with your plan?"

She simply glares at him as if she wants to crush him under her red high heeled feet.

"There's a wall between you...and you bringing down Sonny's organization...and I'm that wall."

Claudia steps close to Jason. He tenses. She runs her hand over his abs. He grips the gun in his hand tighter.

She smiles seductively. "That's why you need to be my inside man. That's what I was suggesting this morning. You work with me to get Sonny to go along...and then when things are running nice and smooth...no more Sonny...no more Anthony...just you and me...two Bosses...both smart enough to know that the way to stay on top is work with the right people. I'm your right person, Morgan. Recognize that...before you end up in a body bag."

"You always threaten death to the people you are trying to convince to help you?"

"Always."

A smile tugs on the corner of Jason's lips. If he wasn't so damn loyal to Sonny, out of necessity for Carly and the boys sake but loyal to the death all the same, he might take Claudia up on her offer. He's been sick of working with Sonny for years. But he gave his word more than a decade before and he would live and die by that word.

Still Claudia and her mafia dreams were a big jolt of life into his quiet boring world.

He's so used to watching everyone happy from afar...what would it be like to feel alive again? She makes him feel alive...that's worth all the rest of the craziness that comes with dealing with this gun-toting, ambition filled, beauty with her brown eyes and her red dress.

He hasn't even known her twenty four hours but he's getting in deep. He's starting to like the feeling of sinking into the ocean of madness that surrounded her. That's not a good sign. Not if he wants to stay alive much longer. Not if he wants to protect his heart and his head.

But right now all he wants is to fuck Claudia until she screams _Jason! Jason! Jason!_ and not just hisses out Morgan.

So what that she just thought about killing him? She'll never get the jump on him. He's too good at what he does to let that happen. He'll talk her down and make all of their lives safe again.

He has to make her be reasonable...or kill her. But that would be a fucking shame.

Claudia is pressed close to him. She rubs against the hard length of him, and smiles. "You want to make a deal with me...you might turn down Anthony or John if they wanted to talk business with you...but I'm the one Zacchara you can't resist." On her tip toes, she moves close to his ear "Can you?"

The elevator jerks back to life. Jason moves away from her. "I'm keeping your gun."

"Answer me, Morgan. Do we have a deal or not?"

The doors open. He lets out a deep breath. "Not."

Before he walks away, he hears Claudia say "One day you'll be saying _yes, yes, yes, Claudia_...bet on it."


	6. part 5, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Five- **

**Last Week of October**

Money. Power. Guns. Blood. Risk. Reward. Cops. Gaurds. It was all part of the world Claudia grew up in and all part of her everyday life now. There has never been a day in her existence that she has not faced the threat of her life ending in a hail of bullets.

But there's no way she will let that fate come to her brother Johnny. That's why it really pisses her off that he's once again missing with that little girlfriend of his...Lulu Spencer.

It was that girl's recklessness that brought Claudia to Port Charles in the first place. For the longest time she stayed in Milan, afraid to face Anthony...afraid she would kill him at first sight...and like it...and be more damaged that she already was, and afraid Johnny would never forgive her leaving him when he was just eight years old. She had no choice but to leave. Kids never get that, though. They only know that the person they loved left.

Lulu had forced Claudia to rush home. She ended up kidnaped by Anthony and, from what the gaurds reported to Uncle Rudy, John could have ended up dead when he tried to go against their father over it.

There was no way that Claudia would let John die over a piece of ass.

She told him to leave that chick alone. Told him to find someone who didn't bring so much chaos into their world, didn't tick Daddy off so much, didn't mean so much to John. She only wanted to protect him. To keep her boy safe.

It hadn't worked because now John and Lulu were pinned down in a barn with hitman shooting at them. John had called and told her "_I don't know if I have enough bullets to hold them off...they'll wait till I run out...and come in here and execute us both."_

Like hell they will. Not her boy.

Claudia presses hard on the gas pedal as she races down the country road. Nothing will matter in her life if she loses John. All her plots and schemes for business fly out of her head. All her thoughts of sexing up hard body Jason Morgan disappear.

She has to save John.

XXXXXXXXX

Promises. Family. Commitment. Honor. Oaths. Death knocking. Hearts breaking. All of this is part of what drives Jason Morgan to race to the rescue of certain people in his life. There are people who believe he will always save them...or save the ones they love...because he has let them believe that. He works hard to not let their beliefs be in vain.

Lulu might be making a mistake by messing with Johnny Zacchara. Its not for him to say. All he can do is try and pull her out of harm's way in time. Today is one of those times that she needs him.

Jason was standing next to Spinelli when Spinelli got a phone call. Jason could hear Lulu screaming frantically _"Oh my God, they are trying to kill me! You have to help me! Please get Jason, Milo, Sonny...SOMEONE, anyone, Spinelli don't let me die." _

Jason had grabbed the phone from a frazzled and shaking Spinelli and asked Lulu where she was. Now he drives his motorcycle sixty miles on hour down a country road to get to her. He has more men on the way. But he can't call the cops. That's not how they do things.

They work outside the law...for better or worse.

Carly always worries about who Lulu is dating this week...Jason can't keep up...but he vaguely remembers she liked that screw up, quickly fired, gaurd they had Logan Hayes. She must have changed her mind...he just hoped she didn't lose her life over that choice. He hoped he could get there in time.

He has to save Lulu.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ten minutes later, Jason sees a car skidding to a stop twenty feet from the barn, it came from the opposite direction as him. He watches the door open and Claudia jump out. She's dressed in black jeans, a white t-shirt, leather jacket and boots. She has a gun in her hand.

Everything in him is conflicted. She could be his back-up...or be another person he has to protect...but why should he protect his enemy? Still, he knows he's going to, if push comes to shove. He parks next to her and hops off his bike.

They don't say hello. Jason whispers "I don't hear any shots being fired. Don't see any cars or shooters but that don't mean they aren't around back still."

"Lets go...it can't be too late already...it can't."

"Some more of my men are on the way. But we can't wait. Come on...stay behind me." His eyes meet hers. He doesn't see a trace of fear in them for herself...he can tell its all for her brother. He stares at her a few seconds too long and she gets agitated about the delay.

She whispers, fiercely, "Go! Or I'm going without you."

They make their way into the forested area around the barn. They circle around the back but no one is outside. Their eyes meet. The shooters are either in there, or Johnny and Lulu's dead bodies are...more than likely those are the only two options.

Crouching down, they start running for the barn when a female scream echoes through the air and then a gun shot is heard. The last thing Jason wants to do is walk into a gun battle with Claudia but he can't exactly take time to wrestle her to the ground and convince her to stay outside. Damn, he hopes she can shoot as well as she can swing those hips when she walks.

He kicks down the door. They see one man with a gun to Lulu's head, while Johnny wrestles with a second gun men, that guy's gun goes off again. The bullet flies wildly, lodging in the side of the barn, just as Johnny pushes the guy away. As soon as he is clear of the crowd, Claudia shoots him while Jason moves close to the other gun man.

"I'll kill her," the man says. He's shaking more and more with every step Jason takes.

"Who do you work for?"

Johnny cries out "He has to work for my father!"

"Who do you work for? Don't make me ask you again."

"She's dead if you don't back off."

Lulu's eyes are wide with fear.

Claudia runs over and grabs the gun from the dead man on the ground, then she quickly hugs Johnny and whispers "Get out of here."

"No way."

Jason has made it to right in front of the second gun man. They face off. "Let her go and I'll let you go."

"Forget about it. Stay back or she's dead!"

Just then two more gunmen come in the door, they all look that way...its not Jason's gaurds because they rise their guns and start firing...mayhem breaks out. Claudia lifts both guns and starts firing back at them, while Lulu stomps on the foot of the man who's holding her. Jason grabs at her arm and pulls her toward him while unloading on that man, and then Lulu and Jason tumble to the ground. He raises up and aims his gun at the door, but those two guys are dead already.

Claudia turns out to be fucking fantastic back-up.

XXXXXXXXXXX

They search the pockets of the dead men. Claudia says "They don't work for Daddy...look at this... they all have money from Argentina. That equals the..."

"Alcazar family," Jason finishes her sentence.

Claudia meets his eyes. "Who's still alive to send hitters?"

"The underboss, some low level soldiers. But the bloodline is wiped out."

"Well, someone is still pissed. Or else this money is a plant. But we can't assume it was Daddy automatically. He might go after Lulu but he would never go after John."

Claudia puts on a front for Jason, seeming to protect her father, but she really is seething inside. If he dared to set this up, make it look like it goes back to some South American family and not him, she will see that man six feet under. She thinks about killing him often but then thinks she one disturbed woman for having such fantasies.

If he did this though...he will have wiped away all her conflicted emotions for good.

Jason's gaurds show up and he orders Claudia, Johnny and Lulu to leave. He walks with Claudia out to her car, as Johnny and Lulu, who are still pretty shaken up take off in his, heading for the Quatermaine mansion where they can be assured of being relatively safe.

Jason tells Claudia "I'll handle the clean up. You make sure that you and your brother don't talk to the cops."

"What kind of idiot do you take me for?"

"I don't. Just saying."

"I'm not going to any cops to confess to shooting multiple men. I need to spend my time pinning down if this really came from the Alcazar family. I won't have anyone going after my brother. Ever."

Jason nodded. "I'll let you know what I find out."

Claudia smiled, slightly. "Oh, now I'm good enough to work with?"

"This is different."

"Who's Lulu to you? How' d you know to show up here?"

"She had a phone. I got a call."

"You the local super hero or what? Is there a bat signal I can send up to get back-up when I need it?"

Jason chuckled. "I doubt you'll need it. Not with the way you shoot."

"Been tearing up the firing range since I was seven. I had a very abnormal childhood." She knew that Jason could not remember his...from her research. Claudia wonders how that would affect a person...having their past wiped out. But this isn't the time or place to ask.

For a moment they just stare at each other. She opens her car door.

"Thanks for the back up today, Morgan."

"Thank you, Claudia...this could have went south fast if you weren't around."

"But I am around now...I've been trying to tell you that's a good thing. Maybe this will make you believe me."She gets in her car, rolls down the window, and asks "You will get in touch if you find out anymore about those shooters? Don't even think about stonewalling me."

"I said I'll let you know. You don't have to threaten me every time we meet."

"Oh you know it turns you on."

He only stares at her.

Claudia adds "You were pretty excited by our gun play in the elevator a few days back."

"Bye, Claudia."

"Catch you later, Morgan."

She drives away and wishes the date she had tonight was with Jason...instead of some doctor she met at The Recovery Room. But Jason won't be anywhere near her bed until he makes her some kind of business deal she can live with...so that her drugs can move on his docks.

Business first. Pleasure later.


	7. part six, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Six **

**Last week in October**

The next two days Jason spends out of town, tracking down Diego Alcazar. It took Spinelli a little work but he found out that Diego had been accessing his father's bank accounts every since Lorenzo died. It doesn't shock Jason to hear Diego is alive...so many crazy things happen in Port Charles that he feels he's shocked proof by now.

He tells Claudia he's pinned down who ordered the hit on Lulu, and he'll handle it. She argues with him so much about going with him that he half expects to turn a corner in South America and run into Claudia at any moment. His fantasizes continue about her and only grow more intense.

He interrogates Diego and finds out that he had many grudges from his time in Port Charles...and most of them center on Jason and Sam...who tried to kill him...and Carly...who didn't treat his father right in his mind...and all the teenage girls who pissed him off one way or another. Lulu was only first on his list, Georgie would follow and Maxie, too. Diego would stop only when most of the women Jason's knows were dead, according to what he screamed and cursed at him when Jason held him hostage.

Jason put him down- for the sake of keeping his family safe, the only reason he has ever killed anyone.

The long plane ride back home leaves plenty of time to fantasize about Claudia. He doesn't even try to stop it anymore. What's the use? The fantasies come back, time and time again.

Not that he is gonna do a damn thing about them. Probably.

_She's my enemy_, Jason repeats that one hundred times a day. Its not sinking in.

XXXXXXXXXXX

His willpower is severely tested that night when Jason walks into The Recovery Room and spots Claudia. This is his bar to go to in order to avoid anyone he knows, where he comes to think and be left alone.

Not tonight. She's here. His blood starts pumping fast in his veins. He regards her like a predator looks at prey, while thinking,_ I want to eat you up._

Jason doesn't turn around and leave before Claudia gets a chance to notice him. His dick leads him right over to the barstool next to her.

She's wearing a short, tight black dress. Not the red one he loses her mind over, but this one makes her look just as fuckable. He can't get enough of her legs...when she's in jeans he can almost think of her as a business rival...but in a skirt, forget about it, his brain shuts off and all he can think about is what it would feel like to reach under that skirt and spread her thighs wide open for him.

Sitting down, Jason orders a beer without saying anything to Claudia. When he finally looks at her she's sipping her bourbon and smiling at him. She gives him a little wave, leans over and whispers "Miss me?"

They share a long look. Jason fights off a smile.

"Its done."

"So Johnny is safe again?"

He nods.

Now they are partners in something, like she always wanted. Murder. Since Jason had no choice but to trust her about the incident at the barn, he figures he can trust her about this too. Its all tied together and they will both be arrested if one of them is.

"You know I'm still pissed at you, Morgan, for telling me to sit home while you went out and _handled it."_

"Add it to the list." All the things she's holding against him so far. The list's getting longer and longer. There wasn't anything he could do about it. His business was his business and not hers.

"Believe me, I have. But I'm not gonna start in on business tonight. I'm worn out. I've had a long day of dress shopping in a city that has exactly two decent boutiques and thirty women fighting over every black and white gown in them. I'd have something shipped from Milan but there's no time. Tell me, Morgan, what kind of ass backward person sends out invitations to a party a week before?"

"Watch it. That's my sister's ass backward boyfriend you're talking about."

Claudia chuckles. "You'll be at the shindig then? You don't seem the get dressed up type. I mean...they make t-shirts in other colors, you know? They even make other types of shirts for men now, if you didn't know. I could get you a catalog."

"Don't waste your energy."

She lifts her drink to him. "At least you look good in it."

Just that much flirting and Jason's about to lose his mind. Every second makes him want her more. He tries to picture things that will starve off a hard on...baseball...war...politics...chick flicks. Yeah, that always works. Nothing is less sexy than one of those. They are pure torture and Jason has had to sit through too many to count over the years. He looks away from Claudia and starts listing them in his head, but then her hands closes over his thigh and there's no way his dick can ignore that.

Looking at her again, Jason finds that Claudia is leaning very close to him. She says "Who's your date?"

All he can see are gorgeous brown eyes, plump moist lips, and her little pink tongue licking them. She's a complete stunner. The full fucking package. Looks, guts and a gun.

(_If I wasn't married to the streets_

_it would be you._

_  
Your lips_

_what make you so cute._

_  
Love when you poke your mouth when your mad too..._

_Best believe she got that good thang,  
She my little hood thing._

_Ask around they know us_

_they know that's my_

_Bust It Baby._

_Everyone know that my_

_Bust It baby._

_And everyone know..._

_love to see her in heels, _

_with the slit in her dress ._

_  
She like to do her own hair, _

_get her own checks. _

_  
My, Bust It Baby,_

_I keep her on deck _) (Plies)

There's very little chance, Jason realizes, he can resist her day after day. Six days in and he is exhausted from trying. Didn't he used to be good at this? In seventeen months of no sex, he was only tempted at the strangest times...in boiler rooms or bridal suites...but those times were not like this. He knew he would do nothing about his desires then. He couldn't for sure say that now.

He answers Claudia, while trying to keep his eyes on hers and not her mouth. "A friend. Yours?"

"A horny doctor who wants to screw me."

_I will find him and kill him_, Jason thinks.

He won't kill this doctor. But he wants to. Somehow he thinks of Claudia as his now...maybe its time to see if she'd like to be or if her flirting is just a game. He hasn't had even a sip of his beer, he's sober but not in his right mind cause he can't be around this chick, when he closes the gap between them and brings his lips to Claudia Zacchara's for the first time.

The kiss is short but sensual. She pulls away, looking hazy eyed. He'd love to see that look every damn morning.

He briefly wonders when he became a guy into public freaking displays of affections. Fuck it. He wanted to kiss her and he did. Damn what people think.

He picks up the convo, as if they hadn't kissed, and to her statement about her date being _A horny doctor who wants to screw me, _Jason asks Claudia "You gonna let him?"

"Maybe. What do you think about that?"

"Its your business."

"Maybe you should have asked me to the Ball, Morgan...right after you agreed to let me use your docks."

He looks away, still feeling her on his lips and not any closer to being sure what she wants. Other than using the Corinthos- Morgan docks. He's got that. Jason would like to take her home and work out all this sexual tension she raises in him but he has a feeling the first word out of Claudia's mouth right afterwards would be _docks._

Jason downs his beer and stands up. He gives her a long look, knowing she's gonna be stuck in his mind all night, and then says "See you there."

Claudia reaches out and touches his arm. "Count on it."

He walks out of The Recovery Room but stops in the doorway to look back at Claudia. She's looking at her glass of bourbon. Jason has no idea what to make of this chick. Maybe she comes onto him just cause it will further her mafia dreams of domination...maybe that don't matter. Maybe he'll sleep with her and then go back to all business.

But he knows he wants her in his bed. And he's hoping she's gonna give it up.

Note-

_Recording artist "Plies" gives a description of a Bust It Baby in his song "Shawty" featuring T-Pain. Basically, this term means a ride or die chick who is also the hottest chick around._


	8. part seven, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Seven**

**Note- the lyrics of the song replace one word because the word used is inappropriate.**

**November 2007**

So far tonight there have only been two good moments of the Black and White Ball for Jason Morgan. One is the smile on Carly's face when they walk down the stairs into the foyer of the ballroom and some servant of Nikolas announces "Presenting Carly Jacks and Jason Morgan."

Jason does not see why that guy is announcing each person's arrival. What about the people who like to keep a low profile? That's all shot to hell because of his big mouth. It must be some kind of royal thing. Its as weird to Jason as this whole color coded party.

But it makes Carly smile. So it's all right. He's only at this damn event to keep her happy. Jax really needs to stop taking so many business trips. He should be the one wearing a monkey suit right now. Jason plans to drink a whole hell of a lot to get through this night.

The other really good moment of the night is when he firsts spots Claudia. She's on the arm of Patrick Drake but Jason only takes a cursory notice of that guy. He's too busy letting his eyes devour every inch of Claudia in her tight black dress. He thanks God that Carly is off talking to her mother. Because Jason would hate to explain the lustful way he can't help but look at Claudia to his best friend. She would have way too many questions.

Claudia's long dark hair is pulled back on the sides, so he gets a great look at that gorgeous face of hers and those juicy lips. No wonder she's stuck in his mind. He bets Claudia is stuck in the mind of just about every man in this room.

One kiss with her is definitely not gonna hold him. Jason wants more.

(_Damn, she bad_

_Damn, she bad_

_Damn, she thick_

_Damn she thick..._

_  
Make a man wanna stop and stare,_

_stare._

_  
I just wanna pull your hair.  
Freaky shit, kinky shit. _

_Yeah we can take it there._

_  
I'm a young Boss, girl._

_Let me upgrade you.  
He's a worker._

_I give work out._

_What you bout, girl?_

_  
Trips to Venice?_

_Venice_

_What's the business?_

_Business._

_  
We switch the digits and the rest is history... _

_Girl, you know you got it... _

_got it _

_got it _

_Hey,  
Hey_

_She got it_

_She got it._.. ) (2 pistols, the remix)

An hour later, Jason watches Claudia dance with Patrick. He thinks _That guy can't handle a chick like her._

After a few more drinks, Jason is just about sick of this engagement party. He's happy for his sister but he can't stand the music, the gossiping, the small talk, the tux he's wearing. Its all bullshit.

And every second of watching Claudia in another man's arms is driving him crazy. He wants to crawl out of his body, or inside of hers, one or the other.

He waits till Patrick walks away and then Jason eases up behind Claudia. Into her ear he says "Ever have sex in a tunnel?"

He's pretty wasted, and very horny and he really doesn't care if she's his enemy right now. He'll care later. He has the rest of his life to be miserable. Seventeen long months of celibacy and his vow snapped like a twig in the moment he met Claudia. There was no doubt when he saw her in his office, he wanted her and he would have her. All the telling himself it would never happen...lies. He really should stop lying to himself one of these days.

It would make life a lot simpler.

Claudia looks over her shoulder at him. Her eyes are dark with desire. Jason nearly kisses her right then, leaning even closer to her lips, but the room full of people make him hold back.

He's dying to be inside of her. To kiss her again and this time not stop at kisses...to caress every gorgeous inch of her body. She licks her lips and his knees nearly buckle.

_Fuck, she's too hot for words_, he thinks, _Thank you, Italy, for sending this woman back to the States. You're loss..._

Jason holds his breath as he waits for Claudia's answer.

She asks "You offering?"

He nods at the patio doors and they walk out there. Jason closes the doors behind him. He turns around and slowly walks toward Claudia. When he reaches her, he takes both hands and run them through her hair, holding her head steady, he tilts it up to look at him. "I'm drunk...just so you know."

"Yeah, well, then that makes two of us."

"But I wanted you when I was sober, Claudia."

"Most men do, Morgan."

"You never call me Jason...call me Jason."

"What will you give me if I do?"

As soon as the last word is out of her mouth, his lips hit hers. Their kisses are wild and intense. Jason has wanted this for every second of every day for the week he's known her...usually he can hold out so much longer...but something about Claudia breaks his will, easily.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

For her this is a simple decision. She loves to have short sexual flings and Jason seems like just the type of man to make an affair an dangerous, seductive thrill ride.

Maybe this will speed along their business negotiations too.

She's being all unemotional about it, a fuck is a fuck and he looks like someone fun to fuck, until Jason's lips hit hears and then she thinks _My God, he kisses like...I've never been kissed before...Don't let me get addicted to this man_.

He pulls back and she whimpers. _More please_, she thinks._ More now!_

Jason offers her is hand and she takes it. They walk back through the ballroom and to the staircase. Some people stare but she doesn't know them and she doesn't care. Wherever Patrick Drake is, he's on his own. She isn't gonna worry about him. He kept talking incessantly about some ex-girlfriend all night anyway. But even if he had been the perfect date, he was not Jason. Jason...the enemy she wanted in her bed from the moment she looked into his blue eyes as she sat at his desk...she had wanted him since the first second they met.

He leads her into a bedroom. Claudia asks "No tunnel? That sounded hot."

"For what we are gonna do...we're gonna need this bed." His mouth joins with hers again and they become caught up in desperate, hungry open mouth kisses.

XXXXXXXXXX

_You were never supposed to have sex again_...that goes through Jason's mind as he unzips Claudia's dress. One look at her nude body and he thinks _Hell with that_.

She jerks off his tie and starts to unbutton his shirt. Her delicate fingers make fast work of it, then they smooth over his bare chest.

_Harmless sex can lead to love...it happened before..._his brain warns. His answer to that is _I'll risk it._

Claudia lays a string of kisses over his jaw and then the corner of his mouth, before she kisses him fully on the lips again, her naked body presses against his half clothed one.

_You might have to kill her one day_...his logical side protests. _Shut the hell up! _Jason silently yells inside of his booze drenched mind._ I want her and I'm going to fucking have her. Deal with it._

That destroys the last of the fight left in Jason Morgan. He was a goner from the first look anyway. She's Claudia Zacchara ...she's too good to pass up.


	9. part eight, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Eight- **

**November 2007**

Jason rarely lets himself just see what he wants and then take it for himself without thought to the consequences. But when he does, he takes it with a voracity that is stunningly intense. He is a man on a mission, once he decides it has to be _Now not later, _like he has decided about the gorgeous and deadly, curvy and crooked, Claudia Zacchara.

He gets her out of her dress in record time and she peels him out of his suit jacket, tie and shirt. He takes one quick look at her in her red bra and panties, and sucks in a breath at the freaking sight of her hardened nipples pushing against the fabric. He has to taste her...that's all there is to it. He pulls down one strap to the bra, and unhooks it all the same time, exposing her nipples to his hungry gaze. His hand comes up and closes over one of her breast, causing her to say "Hard...it has to be hard...remember that."

Oh he won't forget. Believe that.

He squeezes the creamy round globe and flicks at the nipple with his tongue, every second working her over a fraction harder so that the pleasure just builds and builds in her, till he starts nibbling that delicious nipple and then sucking it. She sighs and moans and hums as sensations shoot through her, saying "Uh-huh, Jason, yeah...ohh...just a little harder...rougher...bite me!"

He can do that. He'll do whatever she says cause after he does, she's gonna do what he wants. Of all his fantasies about her, he has settled on his favorite: reverse cowgirl. He can have her ass bouncing in full view, have her riding the length of him, have his hands clamped down on her tits and then rub her clit to make her come for him.

And Jason plans to make her come for him more than once tonight. He wants to make this mob rival of his lose her mind...be hooked on his fingers, his tongue, his dick. Him.

Claudia puts her thumbs in her panties, pulls them away from her and lets them drop to the floor then goes to work on his belt and the button on his jeans. Jason starts to kiss her neck feverishly. He wants to kiss every freaking inch of this woman and that is no joke, from her toes, to her lower back, to her inner thigh, to the folds of her hot, wet sex. He wants all of Claudia...he wants to own her.

But she wants to own him. So this will be one hell of a battle.

_Either way,_ he thinks, as his hands slide to her ass, giving it a hard massage. _I win._

Jason is way too gone to care that Claudia may be his ultimate destruction. He wants to be inside of her and he'll worry about if they end up shooting at each other later. The chance to kill comes around often. The chance to have her naked body sliding against his, getting sweaty slicked and happy, that's beyond rare. It might just be this one time.

But Jason will make it worth it. He will drive into her till she screams his name, till she begs for release, till she can take not one more second and then he will bring her right over the edge and feel her tighten around him like a vice.

Claudia slides her hand into his pants, moving into his boxers and brushing over him. The touch of this woman who is supposed to be off limits, his sworn enemy, his rival in all things, electrifies Jason. _Damn_, he thinks,_ this is so wrong...but so fucking right...if I wasn't supposed to fuck her then why does she look so good and act just like a badass street chick should? That can't be resisted. I'm a man...not a saint._

Anyone who doubts that just don't know this man well enough.

Claudia yanks down his pants and boxers and Jason kicks them off. He grabs her and pushes her back onto the body, laying across her, as they go backward together their mouths join again, with tongues tangling. Her fingers dig into his shoulder.

Kissing her is one of the hottest things he's ever done. He won't dare think about the other women. Claudia is all he can think about right now. She's too damn sexy to not be completely focused on.

Her breasts are too gorgeous. He could suck them for days. Her ass too perfectly round. The feel of it in his hands moments earlier sent heat pooling in his groin, making him grow even harder. Her lips are soft and wet and juicy. He sucks on her tongue, she throws one leg over his back and slides her hot wet slit over him.

Jason knows he has to stop and get a condom, and he will...in a second...in one more second...

_(She's the sweetest taste of sin.  
The more I get the more I want._

_  
She wants to own me.  
Come closer._

_  
She says "Come closer."_

_And I just can't pull myself away  
Under a spell I can't break_

_  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stopI just can't stop  
I just can't stop_

_  
And I just can't bring myself no way  
But I don't want to escape_

_  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop) _(Ne yo)

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Claudia grinds her hips up and presses against Jason. Her spiked heel digs into his back. She knew he would screw her with her red high heels on. He glances at them every time she sees him. Just think about that: Jason Morgan brought down by a pair of spiked stilettos. Claudia shivers at how exciting that idea is to her. She knows those heels are haunting his dreams and nightmares. Its only fair cause Jason haunts her right back.

She needs a man who is strong and take charge. Claudia wants her hair tugged on and her neck left bruised and discolored from his hard, frantic sucking. This is just sex for her because she doesn't think love even exists. And it certainly does not exist between two mob thugs who will pull the trigger if anyone messes with their money or family.

But she doesn't want to think about that day right now. She wants to crawl onto the lap of this man and ride him till he knows she's his master, and he's her bitch. Maybe Jason will never break but she's gonna find out.

She pushes against him, till he is on his back and then she takes him into her hands, stroking him repeatedly, and watching his face as she does. Her fingers grow slick. There is power in this. She holds his pleasure in the palm of her hand- literally. She could ruin him, by being too rough, or just ruin him for all other woman by being as good as he knows she is at this. She licks her lips and bends down, her tongue darts out but she doesn't make contact with him till he pushing his hips up toward her. She loves making him ask for it. "How bad do you want this, Jason?"

His only answer is a grunt.

His eyes are lust filled but he's not completely broken yet. That only makes it more fun for her.

Her tongue swirls over the head of his erection. She teases him mercilessly, until he is desperate for her mouth to take him in, with one last swirl of her tongue over him, Claudia does just that.

"Fuck!" Jason cries.

Her hand grips him firmly as she strokes and licks and sucks in concert. He hasn't even ran his fingers over her center yet but she's wet enough for him to slide into her, and she dying to do just that. Her body is aching to be filled by him. Claudia sits up and moves over Jason but he stops her. He brings his lips to her and kisses her, then the most unexpected thing happens, he pulls back and brushes some hair out of her face and says "This isn't just about you being pretty."

Sure. She's heard that before.

Claudia smiles, ruefully, she knows all the things men say to make themselves feel better.

Jason goes on "I've see pretty everyday...but you're the one who's just as deadly as beautiful." He kisses her hard then as if he has to stop himself from talking. He barely ever uses more words that he absolutely has to, so every one she mulls over like a precious jewel.

Claudia feels her heart race to a level it didn't before.

He actually respects her as a business woman. Damn, now saying that was not playing fair. Cause she wants his body ten times as much now. Jason moves off the bed and she whimpers, needing to feel his lips on her again just as bad as she needs her bourbon daily , just as bad as she craves her power. She watches as he pulls a condom out of his wallet.

"Get your ass back over here, Morgan, now."


	10. last part, jaudia

**Sexy, Can I?**

**Part Nine **

**November 2007**

She watches as he pulls a condom out of his wallet.

"Get your ass back over here, Morgan, now."

He turns and gives her a look that says_ I'll be the one doing the ordering, Zacchara. _He comes back to the bed and, with lightening speed, he is on her again, pinning her hands over her head and nipping at her earlobe. He hisses into her ear "I said call me Jason or this is over." His hand slides down her body until it rests within an inch of her core. "What's my name?"

She withers against him, trying to get his fingers where she wants them without saying it. He pulls them back even more.

"What's my name?"

"Morgan."

"You have it your way, Claudia." Jason starts to get off the bed. She knows it's a bluff but hell, it's a good one cause she will go insane if he walks out on her. No one walks out on Claudia Zacchara. Jason stands over her. She licks her lips. She rubs her breasts, trying to break his will, and murmurs "You could be the one doing this...mmmm. So good..."

"Then say what I want to hear." His finger starts at her belly button and slides down stopping just above her clit. "Last chance."

Their eyes battle and finally, so soft he can barely hear it, she says his first name.

His fingers move against her as his body comes down onto the bed again.

XXXXXX

Claudia got her revenge by making him chant her name like reverent song before she was through with him. She doesn't say anything once she catches her breath, just climbs off the bed and heads for the adjoining bathroom to shower. Jason ends up joining her in there, both his hands closing over her soapy breasts from behind as he enters her. She wonders what kind of man carries around three condoms instead of just one. Does he screw around a lot or was he planning this?

She tells herself not to care but the answer could make all the difference. He gives her one last, sensual deep, soul shivering kiss before she shutters to a climax.

XXXXXXXXX

They get dressed in silence. She just watches him, wondering how he will treat her now. To avoid getting rejected she says "This doesn't change the fact that I am your sworn enemy."

"You treat sworn enemies damn good, Claudia."

"We are not friends. If I have to kill you, I will kill you in a second, Morgan."

He advances toward her and pins her against the wall. Tingles shoot through her body. She loves it when he is forceful and Jason has no problem being that.

"What will it take to cool the Morgan shit?"

"Impossible. Jason...that's a guy you can take home to Daddy. You aren't that for me. You don't want to be and I don't want you to be."

Into her ear, he tells her "You don't have a clue what I want."

She pushes at his chest. _Never fall in love_, echoes in her head. "You got a crush on me? Don't get it twisted. We fucked. It was hot. That's it. I have a date to get back to and you have a Carly to go chase around...what is the deal with that anyway? I saw you at The Metro Court with her...I read your dossier about you and her... I see the way you look at her. What do you need me or any other woman for if you have her?"

Claudia would say anything right about now to escape his penetratingly intense eyes that seemed to be boring down into her soul...asking what she was all about and what they could be.

"Carly will always mean something to me. But I don't sleep with her. Why do you care though? You only want to stay my enemy, right?"

"Right."

"I think you're lying to me or yourself."

"I think you wish I was. Have yourself a nice night, Morgan, and if you are real lucky and I'm needing a release some time in the future...maybe I'll remember your name."

Claudia walks out, aware his eyes are on her ass as she does. She knows she made him crave her body, but she doesn't want to know what else he might crave about her.

_You can't get in my heart...Jason...I don't have a heart...I don't want anything but steamy, hot sex,_ she tells him and herself as she walks down the hallway, away from the man she has only known a week but who is now deep up under her skin, whether she likes it or not.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jason watches Claudia leave and thinks to himself _She's the last one I need to be falling for...but just sex is never just sex for me, is it?_

Claudia intrigues him on multiply levels. He wants to unravel the madness in her mind, to have her on his side instead of the person holding the gun on him, and to even hear about why she says her father's name like Anthony is a curse on her and everything light in the world.

Its crazy to want all that from an enemy. It was crazy to sleep with her. But there are times that Jason Morgan goes crazy over certain women...its rare...but when it happens it is a sight to see. It sets off an earthquake chain reaction through his life and the lives of everyone he knows...no one comes out the other end unscathed, and he is always torched the most.

But, damn, if it isn't fun to play with fire.

_(And I just can't pull myself away._

_  
Under her spell I can't break.  
I just can't stop _

_I just can't stop_

_I just can't stop_

_I just can't stop_

_I just can't stop_

_Come closer..._.)

He's standing there, still smelling her perfume in the room, when the lights go out. Jason thinks to himself _Things can never just be simple around this town, can they?_

**THE END**.

_There is a three part sequel without any sexy references, its about the wild world they live in and how that world can forge an emotional bond, even between sworn enemies_.

Sara


	11. Days of Heartbreak, Jaudia

**Note-** _I broke this into two stories because Sexy, Can I? is all about their physical attraction. This is all about what causes an emotional bond. The tone is completely, completely different. This story is not sexual at all._

_Its violent and disturbing at parts though._

_This story has a lot of Carly in it but this is firmly a Jaudia story. It is not any sort of triangle. There is only a strong Jarly friendship, true to the show, and nothing more._

_Carly plays a major role in bringing about Jaudia's emotional connection though. _

**Days of Heartbreak**

**Part One**

**The Sequel to Sexy, Can I?**

**November 2007**

The Black and White Ball would always go down in Jason's mind as one of the craziest nights of his life. The highs were high as hell- he could still taste Claudia on his lips- but the lows were down right devastating.

During the blackout, Anthony Zacchara went nuts and caused a world of mayhem for all of them, chasing Lulu and Spinelli around in the rain, stabbing Ric, and now he has a gun to Carly's head in the middle of the foyer.

Being Carly she had snuck out of the ballroom Jason left her in, with Cooper Barret who was armed and could keep the guests safe. Jason should have made her promise not to go search for Lulu. That was his first mistake. He won't make a second.

One minute earlier Jason had been creeping down the darkened hallway at Wyndermere, trying to find Anthony, when he heard the man yelling "Corinthos! Morgan! Come out, come out, wherever you are! No more hide and seek! Time for shoot and die!"

Then Jason heard a scream...and he knew whose scream that was.

He ran to the foyer to find Carly shivering in fear as Anthony Zacchara holds a gun to her head. A crowd from the ballroom is gathered around.

"Back..back..." Jason says, as he whips out his gun. "Everybody back off."

Luke chimes in "You heard him, party people. Back in the ballroom. Come on. Chop. Chop. You don't wanna be in the middle of this."

It takes a minute but Luke manages to conjole or flat out threaten everyone back inside but Claudia. Bobbie is working on saving Ric's life in another room, as he bleeds uncontrollably from a stab wound, and Lucky is searching the mansion for Anthony.

Jason tells Anthony "Put the gun down."

"Or what will you do, Morgan? Spank me! Ha..."

"No. I'll put a hole right through you."

Anthony laughs manically and yanks Carly right in front of him. "And you'll kill her if you do! Who's the smart cookie now?"

Jason has his eyes locked on the scene in front of him but he hears Claudia taking slow steps closer. "Daddy...Daddy...what are you doing?" she asks softly, trying to calm him down.

"Maria, is that you? I love it when you call me Daddy. I can't talk right now though. I have to kill this little whore."

He presses the gun to Carly's temple. She cries out. Jason starts walking closer. Claudia moves in too. She tells Jason "Let me..."

His gun is still raised and pointed right at Anthony but he can't get a decent angel for a shot that won't also put a bullet in Carly. He's thinking about trying to get her to understand that she should fall to the ground when he motions for her to. But that will only work if he can get that understood without saying a word aloud.

Jason stares at Carly hard as Claudia starts to speak "Yeah...its me, its Maria..._Daddy_," her voice cracks a little. "I want to go look at the beautiful rose gardens they have here. Will you come with me? You know how I..." Claudia chokes out "love my roses."

Jason can tell its physically painful for her to do this but he couldn't be more grateful that she is.

"Maria," Anthony says "sure...you know I'd do anything for you...right after I...KILL this BITCH! Bang! Bang, bitch!" Anthony laughs again. "Corinthos! Where the hell are you? You got to see this! You messed with my kid. You messed with John! Now I'm gonna kill your wife and then your little girlfriend too! CORINTHOS!"

"Daddy! Stop...you're scaring me. You're scaring your Maria. You don't want to do that, do you?" Claudia walks close to him.

"Stop interfering in my business or I'll have to kill you, Claudia. And don't you ever pretend to be my Maria again. Do you think your Pops is crazy or something?"

"Then kill me, Daddy. But let her go. Let Carly go...its me you really want dead...you can have me...you can have what you always wanted most, Daddy...you can have your little girl and do whatever you want to her."

Jason felt like throwing up the minute he walked into this foyer and saw Carly with a gun to her head but what Claudia said...that actually makes bile rise in his throat. His gut burns with anger at whatever Anthony has put her through in her life, and all he did to Lulu and Spinelli tonight, and what he is doing to Carly. Anthony Zacchara is finished.

Anthony starts to loosen his grip on Carly. Jason nods his head to the side, the fingers of his free hand, that is at his side, make a 1, 2, 3 signal, as he tries to get across to Carly to throw herself down on three.

He raises on eyebrow. She nods.

Anthony has loosened his grip more. He's staring at Claudia like she's a delicious meal. Her head is held high but her eyes are haunted. Jason notices her hand is shoved in her purse, probably with her fingers around a gun.

One, he motions to Carly by showing her only one finger at his side.

"Daddy...I'm right here...take me, Daddy...I'm yours."

"Claudia...you're trying to TRICK me again! You won't let me!"

"No, Daddy, no...I'll let you...I'll be your Maria...please let me be, Daddy."

Jason motions two.

Anthony lets go of Carly some more and starts to reach for Claudia.

Jason motions three.

All of a sudden Sonny appears at the top of the stairs, with a head wound from where he earlier tangled with Anthony and got knocked out. He yells at the top of his lungs "Let her go now, you crazy bastard!"

Mayhem ensues. Anthony tries to jerk Carly back but she's already throwing herself down, while Claudia pulls out her gun. Anthony sees this, sees her betrayal, and his face falls while his eyes fill with rage. He raises his gun toward Claudia but before he gets halfway up, Jason and Claudia both fill him with holes.

A moment later, Sonny is downstairs, people are screaming in the ballroom because they heard the gunfire, and Jason is crouched on the ground holding Carly close to him. His eyes meet Claudia's. She looks shattered...he hates that she had to kill her own father...no one should have to do that.

He watches her turn and look down at Anthony and say, in a tear filled voice, _"Daddy."_

XXXXXXXXX

A few minutes later, Carly is calm enough to go into the ballroom with Sonny, saying she's going to get a drink and there better be some damn alcohol left at this party.

Jason makes his way to Claudia, who is sitting next to her father. Her eyes are flat as she stares at him, but her face is wet from the silent tears that slide down it. He crouches down next to her. "Hey."

Claudia looks at him. "Your friend...she's okay, right?"

"Carly's fine...Why don't we cover him up?"

She takes his hand and strokes it. "No...I want to look at my Daddy a while longer. I want to remember for the rest of my life that...he was not a good man. I don't want to forget that. I can't forget that because then..." she stops suddenly, as if she just realized she had revealed too much.

"I'm sorry you had to do this. But you had to...he gave you no choice."

"We always have choices, Morgan."

"Not always. You had to do this. Hey...look at me, please." Their eyes meet. "You had to do this...and you can live with this...but you shouldn't have to. I should have handled Anthony a while ago...before tonight...before you had to live with what happened here."

"Everybody has things they have to live with," she says in a haunted voice. Then she looks at the dead body of her father and repeats "Everyone."

They hear a man ask, in a shocked and teary tone, from the stairway "Claudia?"

"John...Daddy's gone, Johnny. I killed him. I killed Daddy."

John Zacchara, who was rain soaked and looked like he had been wrestling in the mud, came down the last few stairs slowly. Then he ran over and fell on his knees, dragging Claudia into his arms, he stroked her hair.

Jason stood up and walked away. He owed Claudia a debt now. And he would never forget that.


	12. days, part two

**Days of Heartbreak**

**Part Two**

**The Sequel to Sexy, Can I?**

**November 2007**

Jason can't believe it when he sees Jasper and Jerry Jacks at the Black and White Ball. It's a few hours after Anthony was killed, nearly dawn.

Jason walks into the room where every doctors who's in attendance is working on Alexis and Ric, and that's when he spots Jax.

The room is in chaos.

"You go, Ric! You're hurt worse."

"Alexis, go..." he whispers weakly. "Sonny...make her."

"You're going!" Sonny orders. "Now."

"You heard him," Jax says and scoops her up. He takes off out of the room.

Jason asks Bobbie "Where'd he come from? I thought no one can get off or on this island because of the storm."

"No one who doesn't want to risking dying," Bobbie answers "Nikolas had a satellite phone and called the mainland for a helicopter for Alexis. But no helicopter would come out. It looked like Alexis might die, unless we did a makeshift surgery on her- which we don't have the equipment for. It was really sad...seeing her face when she heard that...seeing Ric and Sonny...the look they shared... Alexis asked to call Jax to say good-bye. It turns out he had gotten back from New York and his meeting, so him and Jerry jumped on a boat and hurried across the lake to rescue her."

"The storm still looks too rough for the rest of us to leave."

"Look out that window," Bobbie says. "You want to go out into that? Cause I sure don't. Now tell me...how's everyone I love?"

Jason has no choice but to tell her about what happened to Carly. But he assures her Carly is fine now, if a little shook up, and that all the other Spencers are too.

_If only Claudia was just as lucky_, he thinks, _She's the one paying the highest price tonight_.

Jason wanders back to the ballroom to try and find Claudia and check on her. He hasn't seen her since she was sitting near her father's body. When he went back a half an hour later, she was gone. He still can't find her so he concentrates his attention on Spinelli, Lulu and Carly.

Hours later, the storm finally dies down so everyone is able to start being ferried back across the lake home. Soon the cops show up with their questions.

After Carly answered hers, Jax comes back from dropping off Alexis. He walks up to Jason and Carly, then hugs his wife. "I can't believe what happened here tonight...I'm sorry I couldn't find you when I was here earlier but I had to get straight to Alexis...you understand, right?"

Carly glares at him.

Jason looks at Jax and just shakes his head. It will be a long night for those two at home for sure. Kissing Carly's temple, Jason says "You okay now?"

She nods.

"Go home with Jax. The storm broke completely...you'll be all right. Get some rest."

"I can't sleep after what happened."

"Then just go home, hug the boys and tell them you love them...tell them I love them too...tell them everyone they love is safe."

Jax says "That sounds like a good idea. Seeing the boys is just what you need, Carly. You ready?"

Jason watches them walk away, then turns around and spots Mac Scorpio interrogating Claudia. He makes his ways closer.

"Morgan!" Mac bellows. "You're coming down to the station to answer some questions. You and Ms. Zacchara."

"You got questions. Call my lawyer. We'll come down later today. Right now, Claudia needs to get home."

"Don't speak for me, Morgan."

He gives her a questioning look. She looks likes she just might fall to pieces at any moment, but she also looks angry enough, and deadly enough to kill ten more men tonight. The contrast is stunning. Jason just wants to hug her...hug his god dang enemy. Its crazy but true.

Sleeping with her was one thing. That's sex. This is comfort. It's a different sort of intimacy that can't be put on the human need for sexual release.

Mac says "We're doing this now. You come willingly or I cuff you. What will it be?"

Jason shakes his head, wearily. This going to the police station after every little shooting is really starting to get old. He never answers any questions, but they ask them over and over anyway.

"Fine," Jason says. "Lets get this over with."

As they head for the boat, Jason places his hand on Claudia's back, guiding her along the wet grass. She doesn't shake him away. It's the only way she allows him to be useful to her right now.

He'd love to be her hero but he knows its too late for that.

XXXXXXXXXX

The boat ride to mainland passes in a blur for Claudia. Jason sits next to her, their shoulders touching, and cops are all around. The sun is high in the sky over them. It looks like a beautiful day but she knows its not.

_Today I killed my father_, she thinks.

Once she had been his little girl, before Johnny was born, and once he had loved her right.

(_I remember blue skies,_

_walking the block_

_  
I loved it when you held me high  
I loved to hear you talk_

_  
You would take me to the movie  
You would take me to the beach_

_  
You would take me to a place inside  
That is so hard to reach_)

For all the ways that Anthony has hurt her, has abused her, has watched her abused by pervert gaurds and lawyers who think fifteen year old girls make good girlfriends...for all of that...for sending her away and for ripping Johnny from her arms...she hated him. But he was her father. She had loved him too.

Jason is right beside her, but she doesn't think Jason can understand. No one can understand her black soul now. Jason is just the guy who she thought was sexy...and though she could use strong arms to heal her grief...could any man's arms be strong enough now? Could any man stomach kissing her...knowing what she is?

_Today I killed my father_, she thinks over and over, as the wind blows her dark hair away from her face.

(_Father of mine  
tell me where did you go?_

_  
You had the world inside your hand  
but you did not seem to know_

_  
Father of mine  
tell me what do you see?_

_  
When you look back at your wasted life  
and you don't see me..._

_I will never be safe  
I will never be sane  
I will always be weird inside  
I will always be lame_) (Everclear)

_I killed my father. I killed my father. I killed my father,_ is all she can hear in her head.

She's supposed to be a bad ass. Claudia Zacchara is the baddest woman ever born. But she just feels like an orphan now. A murderous orphan.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jason gets done with his interrogation. He sends Diane home but decides he'll wait around to see Claudia. It feels like he should thank her again for helping him save Carly.

It also feels like somehow Jason should help Claudia deal with her father's death. He remembers losing Alan and how it felt like someone had reached into his chest and pulled out a piece of his heart, his lungs, his bones...he was left numb, breathless, weak.

One moment a person was there, in his life,...it was all a mess but they were there...there was a chance. Then it was over. He wonders if Claudia feels like that now. No one should face that alone.

_Will she let Johnny help her_? Jason thinks as he paces the police station. _Someone has to help her_.

Claudia comes out of the interrogation room, with Dara Jensen behind her. Jason takes three large steps and he's right in front of Claudia. Touching her arm, he asks "You all right?"

"Why do you care, Morgan?"

Jason startles at her harsh tone. Obviously she needs someone to lash out at and he's it.

Claudia goes on "You think I'm trying to pin a murder rap on you or something?"

"No."

Dara says "It was clearly self defense," loud enough for the whole squad room to hear. "There will be no trail. A party full of witness can give statements to just how dangerous Mr. Zacchara was last night." She looks at Claudia "Call me if the cops contact you again. I need to go. I'm missing my kid's soccer game. You have a ride home?"

"I'll take a cab," Claudia says.

Once Dara walks off, Jason tells Claudia "I could give you a ride. Spinelli is waiting outside."

Claudia simply stared at him.

Jason adds "He works for me."

"I know that. And he lives with you. What's the deal with have a male roommate at your age?"

"The kid needed somewhere to stay."

"Whatever. You don't have to explain yourself to me. We're enemies, remember?" She leans forward and whispers in a deadly tone "Or are you looking to make deals now that I'm the Boss? You reconsider the issue of the docks?"

Jason looks around the police station. Then he drops his voice and says "You want to talk business now? Here?"

"I don't want to talk to you at all, Morgan."

Claudia walks off. Jason follows her. He doesn't say anything till they are outside. She's hurrying down the block, away from the building.

"Claudia..." he reaches for her arm.

She spins around angrily. "You want to shoot me? You should do it now. We're enemies, right?! Go for it! This is the last time you'll ever see me without gaurds around. This is the last day I will ever be unprotected in this world. So do it, Morgan." She opens up her arms wide. "Take your best shot! You have your gun?"

Claudia reaches around his waist. Jason grabs at her hands, stilling them. "Shoot me, Morgan," she cries. "Come on...I'm just the whore who is your enemy, right? You don't want to work with me...to see me as a player...I'm just a bitch who killed to be the Boss...killed my own god damn father!"

"I don't think that at all." He tries to hug her but she pushes him away.

Claudia looks into his eyes, giving him a cold stare. "Don't think you know me, Morgan. You don't KNOW me! Don't pity me. That will be the mistake that gets you killed...don't say you never had your chance to get rid of me."

She starts to walk away. It's a heartbreaking image. Claudia in her wrinkled black ball gown, her hair a mess, her make-up ruined, her eyes dead, her shoulders forced back. Jason calls out to her "Hey..."

She looks over her shoulder.

"Thank you, Claudia."

She nods, then turns and walks away, leaving Jason to wonder how he can ache so hard and feel so deeply the pain of a woman he's known a week.

She saved his family tonight but she lost hers. Its not fair. Jason wants to somehow make it right for Claudia but he can't.

You only get one father, and she killed hers...and Jason is glad she did. Claudia has been stuck in his mind for everyday since they met but now he knows she'll be there for everyday from now on for a much different reason.

He'll never be able to do enough to pay her back.

But he's more worried about if she will ever really recover. She's way too amazing- tough, bold, fierce, sexy, smart mouthed, wild, cunning, he's already noticed all that and more about her- to be made into a shell of herself because of this.

He wants to see that beautiful bombshell that broke into his office and tried to boss him around again. He wants Claudia to be okay. Jason just doesn't think she will let him help her...still he feels he should.

She saved his best friend. He owes her for life now.


	13. days, part three

**Days of Heartbreak**

**Part Three**

**The Sequel to Sexy, Can I?**

**November 2007**

Jason leaves the police station and tells himself that he shouldn't bother Claudia, even though his gut tenses with worry for her. They had sex once, he isn't her man. She needs time to deal with her grief. But after going home and sleeping for ten hours, he wakes up and she's the first thing on his mind.

A few hours later he drives his motorcycle to the gaurd house at the front gates of her mansion. He asks the gaurd "You know who I am?"

"Yeah..." the man has his hand on his gun.

"Tell Claudia I'm here...and I'm not leaving without seeing her."

The guards nods, makes a phone call and then opens the gate. Another gaurd approaches Jason as he climbs off his bike, and motions for him to follow him inside. He leads him to the den, where Claudia is standing by the window, drink in hand, staring out.

Jason waits for the gaurd to leave and then Jason says her name, but nothing else.

"What are you doing here?" Claudia asks, each word biting.

He knows she doesn't want to lean on him. But he also thinks she might need to. And Jason knows he needs to be the one there for her. Its only right. She's given him so much in just one week...made him decide to break his sex vow, took him into her body and made him scream her name, made him smile and laugh and be frustrated over and over...made him think and feel...saved his best friend's life. Claudia has made his world a thousand times better, whether she knows it or not.

"Checking on you." He takes a few steps closer. "Have you eaten anything today?"

Claudia takes a long drink and then walks over to the desk, sets the glass down, and looks at Jason. "I don't need you to come here and pour chicken soup down my throat. I'm not that kind of sick."

"You can't just drink bourban...without eating...or you will be physically ill, eventually. How will you take care of Johnny then?"

Her eyes flare with anger. "Don't question how I take care of my boy!" She reaches for the glass, but her shaking hands cause it to fall to the ground and break. "Fuck!" She bends to pick it up but Jason rushes over to do it.

They are both crouched down, with their faces near each other. He can see that her eyes are red rimmed and weary. She probably didn't sleep all day. "Leave the glass..."

"Don't give me orders. I'm the Boss now. I don't take orders," her voice shakes as she tells him this. Claudia picks up and piece of glass and cuts her hand. "Ouch!"

"That's it," Jason says under his breath. He scoops her into his arms, and stands up, heading out of the room.

"What in the hell are you doing, Morgan? You trying to get shot?"

"Shoot me. Go ahead." He calls her bluff. "Get it out of your system."

She glares at him.

Her gaurds swarm them, as Jason heads for the stairs. Ten guns point guns at his head. "Call them off, Claudia."

"Stand down, boys."

Jason carries her upstairs. "Which one is your room?"

"I'm not in the mood to fuck you right now."

He stops in his tracks and stares at her. Their eyes hold. After a long minute she finally softens, sucking in a shaky breath.

Claudia says, softly, "You don't belong here."

"I tried to stay away. I couldn't. I'm here. Let me stay."

She buries her face on his shoulder. Jason kisses her forehead. She whispers "First room on the left."

He takes her in there and lays her on the bed. Then sits down next to her, taking her hand.

XXXXXXXXXX

Claudia doesn't want to lean on Jason. Everything in her is wrecked right now. All the memories from her childhood, in this house of horrors, close in on her every time she turns a corner. She's gone her whole life never counting on any man, outside of her beloved Uncle, to love her unconditionally...so she doesn't think Jason can. He will always be her enemy first, there will always be conditions.

Nothing can change that.

She'd love to sleep with him again, just to feel strong arms around her, but she's too fragile right now. It would be making love, not having sex. Claudia hasn't ever made love in her life. Today...the day she killed her father...is not the day to start.

_Because Jason isn't my man, _she thinks. _He's here, yeah. Cause he's feeling guilty. That's all_.

Still its comforting to have his hand in hers. She can almost think about not having another drink tonight, if Jason keeps holding her hand.

And that's one hell of an accomplishment for her right now.

_(Your love _

_in all its finery_

_tears up the darkness all around me_

_  
until I can breathe again  
until I believe again_)

The power Jason has to calm her nerves scares the hell out of Claudia, so she tries to push him away. "You should have stayed home tonight. I don't do relationships...we aren't a couple just cause we screwed once."

"Fine. We aren't a couple."

"Could you have agreed any damn quicker?!"

He shakes his head, wearily. "I'm not fighting with you tonight. You want to fight? Fight that wall...cause I didn't come here to argue."

"Just so you know...if you ever do this again...try to order me around in my own house...I'll give the men _shoot on sight _orders for you."

Despite her tough words, she squeezes his hand. Claudia does not want Jason to leave go of her hand. It feels like everything inside of her is raw, and when he touches her some of that raw pain eases.

She does her best to not let herself think about how they are bitter mob rivals. How her business depends on either getting him to play ball or killing him.

Claudia will do whatever she has to in order to make her empire flourish. Caring, even a little, about Jason Morgan was never supposed to be part of her plans.

But all her plans seem to crumble when she thinks of what she is now- a daughter who murdered her Daddy.

(_Cause I'm a train wreck  
waiting to happen_

_  
Waiting for someone to come pick me up off the tracks_

_  
A wild fire born of frustration  
born of a world, _

_oh,_

_that gets me so high_...)

He tells her "The next time I carry you to a bedroom, you'll ask me to do it first...count on that."

Her eyes lighten, a small smile curves her lips. "You should be so lucky, Morgan."

"I thought you're gonna call me Jason."

"Jason..."

"Better."

XXXXXXX

Morgan. That's the guy she could take or leave. Kill or fuck. Make a deal with or make his shipment sink.

Jason. That's the man who gets to kiss her, hold her hand, whisper her name in her ear, see her tears...he wants to be Jason to her. Needs to be.

He tries not to think about why. That will certainly only make him freak out. One of them has to keep a cool head tonight.

Just because he always looks hard and blank like cold steel, does not mean he doesn't fear as much as any other human. But tonight there is only room enough in this room for one of their fears and Claudia is the one whose demons are on full display right now.

With his free hand, he brushes an errant strand of hair away from her eyes. Even when she looks like this- her own unique mixture of sad, bitter and angry- Claudia is still so beautiful that Jason thinks it should be illegal to look like her. How could any man resist wanting her in his life? He knows he can't.

All the things they have in common make it easy to understand each other, but hard to be together. Still, she needs someone right now. If not for Anthony dying, Jason could have just kept Claudia in his head...as the woman he sleeps with but doesn't let himself feel too much about...but now she's drifting from his head right down into all of the rest of him.

He's too worried about her to be scared for himself, though. Jason's one goal was never to bring another woman into this lifestyle, not after what happened to Sam. But Claudia was in the mafia long before she met him last week. She's in this world...and she's suffering and she needs him. He can't turn his back on her.

Jason can see the pain etched into her eyes. She wants to be strong enough to tough this out alone. He used to try doing that too. It doesn't work. He will be damned if Claudia has to wake up each day thinking no one cares if she's all right. He cares. He's just got to make her see that.

They can figure out the sex part of this thing later. He isn't worried about that right now. He wants her but he will always want her...look at her...who wouldn't? But sex isn't why he came here tonight. Jason just wants to dry her tears, if she will let him.

They stare at each other for a long moment. "Do you want me to get you some food?"

"I can't eat right now."

"Did you get any sleep yet?"

She shakes her head and looks away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_How can I sleep?_ Claudia thinks. _All I see is Daddy...he's in my head, yelling all his crazy words at me, touching me, hating me, sending me away, making me kill him._

Anthony is the worst thing that ever happened to Claudia. And the whole reason why she is alive. Its hard to reconcile the two in her head.

"You need to rest."

Jason stands up. He starts to take off her boots, slowly sliding the zipper down on each of them. She watches him, silently. The world slows down. The pain starts to drain away...she can cry more later...she just wants to feel sane for five minutes in a row.

His eyes make her feel that way. Sane again. She knows she's not...he must know she's not...but he's eyes say that he believes in her.

If it is a lie, Claudia will believe it, for tonight.

_(Your eyes,_

_like midnight fireflies,_

_  
light up the trenches where our loves lies_

_  
until I can see again,  
find my way back again_)

He lifts her foot and massages it. The tender gesture brings tears to her eyes. She sucks in an unsteady breath. He then shrugs out of his jacket and tosses it on the ground. Jason sits down and takes off his own boots.

Claudia sits up. She wraps her arms around him, from behind, and rests her chin on his shoulder. "You can go...Jason...really."

"No...I told you...I can't stay away."

He turns his head and their eyes met. He raises his hand to caress her cheek and then brings his mouth to hers. Claudia starts to shake as a wave of unwanted emotion sweeps through her. The kiss is gentle and soul healing for her.

(_And your mouth,_

_it's all that I wish_

_Mercy of your lips,_

_just one kiss_

_  
Until I can _

_breathe again._

_  
Until I can sing again)_

That one kiss makes her want him to stay more than she has ever wanted anything in life. More than she wants power...but she still wants her power badly. Tonight she needs Jason though.

When she pulls away, Claudia scoots back up the bed, and lays on her side. Jason lays behind her, pulling her close to him. Into her ear he says "You might regret coming back here...after all that went down yesterday...but I'll never regret you moving back home."

"One day, Jason...one day I might order your death. You'll sure regret me then."

"That's business. I'm not talking business, Claudia."

She pulls another shaky breath into her lungs, as her eyes close.

Jason whispers in her ear "Sleep...your worst enemy will keep on eye on you."

"Thank you, Jason."

"Anytime."

She wonders if that feeling will last for him. Claudia doesn't want to hope it does...but she is..._she is._

_She's hoping. _

Claudia is a woman of many addictions. Jason is shaping up to be her biggest one ever.

_(To fall_

_so deep into you_

_  
Loose myself _

_completely  
in your sweet embrace_

_  
All my pain's erased _) (Sarah McLachlan)

**THE END**

**Thanks for reading this story! **

**So there you go. The end of my latest stab at writing Jaudia. I can't say they are easy to write, because their dynamic is complicated, but I do enjoy trying to make them seem plausible. Because there is no way both the SBs should be on a soap together and not paired up- not to my way of thinking, at least.**

**Sara**


	14. Get Down on the Floor, JoMax

If good girls get down on the floor, tell me how low would a bad girl go?- lyric from a song by Mims.

**Mature**

**Maxie and Johnny**

**Get Down on the Floor**

**Note- for purposes of this story, Maxie never slept with Spinelli.**

**Part One**

**September 2008**

_It happened really fast.._.that's his first excuse.

One minute they are knocking back shots in his living room, the next he's tossing the glass at the fireplace, saying "Fuck it," then spinning around and going for what he wants more than the booze he had been trying to use to dull all his aches.

In his head, he lists the reasons why he is about to kiss Maxie Jones.

Before the list is even started, he's moving toward her, her delicate pink lips all the temptation he needs to finally do what he's been fantasizing about doing for months. The list ticks off, with the beat of the clock on the wall; every second a new excuse is born._She's been coming on to me for months. I'm not a saint. Its been a hard day. Too hard to face alone. That hospital...how I hate that fucking mental hospital...with its bars on the windows and guards at the door, its as stifling as Crimson Point ever was...I just need a release...it will only happen once..._

_I'm Johnny Zacchara, I can have whatever I want..._

_I'm Johnny Zacchara, don't I deserve to chase off the demons anyway I can?_

_This doesn't really count cause we aren't in love._

His lips hit hers. He drags her feather light little body close to his as he runs his fingers into her hair. One quick brush of his mouth against hers is simply not enough. But he never planned to stop at that anyway. His tongue darts out to sweep across her cherry sweet lipstick stained lips, demanding entrance into her mouth. She opens for him...and that's it...the runaway train jumps the track...and there is no stopping now.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

She wants to say this isn't thrilling to her: to watch his willpower break, knowing he hates himself for wanting her and wants her anyway, feeling his hips harshly mold to hers, that he isn't being kind, that he ruthlessly assaults her mouth with his own. That he is most decidedly not a good guy.

But it does thrill her.

He's brooding, tortured, the son of a killer, the brother of a killer, on the way to being a killer himself...just give him time...he's killing all the light in himself, a little more every day, and soon it will be wiped clean. Johnny's a fucked up mess. That really gets Maxie's blood pumping.

Especially cause Lulu thinks he's a good man, just born into the wrong family. An artist who would _be_ teaching children to play Brahms's lullaby if not for his bad genetic luck. Yeah, right. Maxie don't buy that for a minute.

If Lulu saw the way he looks at Maxie when they are alone, she would have no doubt about how dark his heart truly is. All the better for Maxie that Lulu never caught on. It can be her and Johnny's little secret. Like this kiss, like how this will go beyond just kisses.

No one has to know he's not still struggling to be a good guy. That he gave up that battle and gave in to her, to sin, to the hunger that rages in his gut to find something wild to tame...the open road, gravity, himself, Maxie.

Shhhhh. Don't anyone tell and she won't either.

His girlfriend who is stuck in the mental hospital wouldn't want to hear about that.

_XXXXXXXXXXXXX_

_Both are dressed in black. They walk into his apartment without saying a word. He heads straight to the wet bar and pours shots for them. After knocking a couple back, Johnny says "Thank you...for taking her to Shady Brook with me today. Claudia is out of town and I couldn't face that alone."_

_"You didn't have to put yourself through it all. Not like Lulu knew we we're there. It could have been us, Lucky, Liz and Nikolas or Big Bird, Donald Duck and Peter Pan. Its all the same to her now."_

_"Don't sound so broken up about it. Your bitter little heart is showing."_

_Maxie shrugs. "Don't get me wrong, I don't like that this happened to her but its not like she's a fallen angel...Lulu was just as big of a bitch as I am and she never owned up to that ...and even worse of a man eater than I could ever be...and a know it all...and a harem maker...and she hurt Georgie and Spinelli and -"_

_"Is there a but in there somewhere?"_

_She smiles. "But...I didn't want her to go crazy. I just knew she would. You did too. That's why you're hating yourself right now. You knew you were playing fast and loose with her sanity...but it felt so good to do her that you just didn't care."_

_"Rub it in. I don't feel like shit enough already."_

_"You wanna know the real shame, Johnny boy? It would feel even better to do me than it did Lulu...cause I know how to do things Lulu hasn't even heard about and I don't blush when I do them either. If you would have realized that months ago...Lulu wouldn't be staring at a wall right now. Oh well, better late that never to learn your lesson. I'm still here and...I'm not crazy yet. Wanna see if you can break another blonde?"_

_With a lightening quick movements she strips off her dress, revealing a white bustier, garter belt and thigh high stockings. Yes, that's right, this morning she dressed for sex beneath her knee length black burial gown._

_Not that she had plans for this to happen...but Maxie knew if not today...then tomorrow or next week...but it's gonna happen. Johnny has been wanting her for months. With Lulu locked away, he has the perfect chance to take her._

_A second after his eyes sweep over her lingerie clad body, the glass in his hand goes flying, shattering on the mantle of the fireplace. Let the good times roll._


	15. part two, jomax

**Mature**

**Maxie and Johnny**

**Get Down on the Floor**

**Part Two **

**September 2008**

They don't try to make it to the bedroom. The words fast and dirty must have been created just to describe this moment in time for Johnny Zacchara and Maxie Jones...and if those words were not created for this couple then will surely belonged to them exclusively by the time they are through.

He thinks about taking her from behind as her naked body is pressed against the sliding glass door, so that the whole city can see just how lowdown he really is. So he can stop pretending he's redeemable.

But that thought quickly flies in and out of his mind, as her hand strokes up and down the rock hard length of him, creating friction and heat, a slippery wetness, that sucks all his attention to her ministrations. The sight of her hand wrapped around him is visible proof: _he is bastard of the first degree. _

Every stroke is like a curse and a blessing all in one, saying_: You know what you are...I know what you are...its okay...the edge is right here, jump...you can't destroy yourself twice...just get it over with already...admit you are no better than me...admit you like being this wrong...who cares if she understands...who cares about anything but finding that next thrill...come on, Johnny, come fully to the dark side...you aren't fooling anyone but her...you aren't fooling me...I like who you are...not who you pretend to be...come on, Johnny, come on...that's right...just a little further...don't the edge look nice?_

His head drops back and he lets out a low guttural moan.

He might never be the same after this. He might be as disturbed as his father. Or as free as his sister. Or as crazy as his girlfriend. But he won't be a fraud anymore. There are sleeping demons that lay within in him, and Maxie is rumbling them to life.

She drops to her knees, taking him into the hot, tight suction of her mouth. His body will savor every lick of her tongue over his skin, every squeeze of her hands, every moan he draws out of her or she yanks out of him, but its all the other parts of Johnny that are getting even more out of this...for Maxie is making him feel understood and accepted.

Don' t think for a second that makes this right though. He knows its not even in the ballpark of right or justifiable behavior.

There are so many reasons Johnny never should have let this happen. Lulu is in Shady Brook. He was supposed to be better than cheating on her the first chance he gets. But he was never as good as he tried to look in her eyes...and always just as bad as Maxie believed.

_Lulu's wrong about me, _Johnny thinks as he fists his hands in Maxie's hair, _but she's crazy so I can't really blame her for that, now can I_?

There's no one to blame but himself. He's guilty of craving Maxie from the first time she brought her lips to his, and of fantasizing about driving himself into her ever since she straddled his lap. Johnny is not an innocent who's being seduced.

A devious smile plays on his lips. He's loving every second of this downfall.

He could at least have the decently to be ashamed. No wonder the Zaccharas have such a bad reputation. Ruthless, selfish, takers every last one of them, all headed straight to hell.

But at least they have a damn good time on the way down.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Later, there will be guilt and tears.

Not to bring God into this or anything, but God knows that Maxie Jones does have a conscious. She pays for her sins and her selfishness and her weaknesses every time. But it still doesn't stop her from finding new sins to commit, new men to take as her own when she has no right, and new temptations to not resist. But thinking of that is all for later.

For right now she kissing the hottest man she knows, his tongue is sweeping through her mouth, setting off pathways of nerves that tingle all down her body, making her nipples hard and her panties wet.

Can she be expected to feel shame right now?

Its way too soon for repercussions. She's still in the thick of things now, the messy middle part that is always the most fun. The part where she really manages to make a disaster of her life...and always has the best time doing it.

She whispers into his ear "Don't fuck me like you do Lulu." As she darts back to look in his eyes, he's smiling, just like she knew he would be.

See. She knows things about Johnny his little girlfriend can't even guess.

She's still wearing her bustier, thigh highs, and white garter when he bends her over the back of the couch, rips off her panties and then presses his body against her back. His hands both slide around her and up the front of her bustier, till they close over her breasts, kneading them harshly.

Her body tingles from head to toe. No wonder she always does this sort of thing...forbidden sex...its the hottest kind she's ever known. And Johnny has been her target for months. He's wickedly dangerous. He's fucking hot as blazes. She looks at him and thinks _Now, please, _every time she sees him.

Plus he's miserable pretending to be everything he is not and can never be: a saint, faithful, calm, reasonable, normal. He's crazy...he knows it...she knows it... but its not the kind that gets you locked away from life. Its the kind that makes you have to dance right on the edge of a building, knowing you will fall, knowing you could die, knowing life isn't supposed to be lived this way...but you can't help it.

She knows that feeling all too well, and its why she wants him so badly. Why this had to happen. Why she doesn't even care that its happening the day Lulu is institutionalized. Johnny should be with someone like her...if not forever...than on crazy nights like this, at the least,...when the only thing that will quiet the dragon roaring in his head is burying himself deep into someone who isn't looking for him to go slow, apologize later, and be a gentleman. Hell with that. Life is too short. She wants to feel his hard length stretching her wide, she wants to bite his neck and draw blood, she wants to pull his hair out and tell him to suck her dry. She wants it fast and dirty, and so does he.

His fingers slide into her wet heat. Her body is pulsating with tension, wanting some kind of release, needing it more and more with every second that passes. She whimpers and lets out soft sighs as he moves in her.

Looking over her shoulder, she asks "Do you have protection?"

A little late in the game to bring it up but at least she remembers in time. He nods and moves back a little, robbing her of all the pleasure he was bringing her, but soon she forgets her complaints as he sheaths himself in a condom and slides into her, his hands on her ass holding her steady. Everything about their movements is hard, hard, harder, harder...until her screams are so loud that if she isn't waking the neighbors its a freaking miracle.


	16. part three, jomax

**Mature**

**Maxie and Johnny**

**Get Down on the Floor**

**Part Three**

**September 2008**

Maxie rides Johnny savagely, for sweetness will only confuse matters at this point, as he lays on the floor of his living room. Little desperate moans float from her lips.

There's no talk of moving to the bedroom. To stop for one moment will break the spell, risk bringing reason into the equation and this is not the time to let something trivial like that invade in on them. Thank God Claudia is out of town and won't be walking in on them.

Every time Maxie sinks down the length of him, delicious sensations shoot through her body, caused by the feel of him and by the thrill of sinning. She can feel him getting closer and closer to letting go. His hand slides down from the nipple he was pinching and twisting to close in on her clit. This time...unlike the two times earlier tonight...they come at the same moment, two criminals in this fully together, one no more or less guilty than the other.

She collapses onto his chest, smiling as she does, and he brushes her damp hair off her forehead.

Their eyes meet and they smile at each other. Maxie rolls off of him, lets out a long breath, and says "Now tell me that wasn't totally _worth_ it."

As soon as she has caught her breath, she grabs her clothes and heads to the bathroom. Afterwards is not the time to stick around long in a situation like this- Maxie learned that the hard way before with a different bad boy. Looking back over her shoulder, she sees Johnny's watching her walk away. His dark eyes are filled with animalistic hunger, she grins at how deep his well of need runs. That's something she understands all too well.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

He crawls onto the couch to wait for her to come back. Johnny knows guilt should be coursing through his veins right about now but he just can't work up any yet. He wonders what that makes him...evil? Deranged? Just weary and bruised from one too many battles in this crazy town in the last year? A little broken but not completely cracked yet?

Johnny isn't really sure he even cares to what level he is affected by all he is and all he is not right now. Cause tomorrow he will surely grow darker, and darker, there's just no way to escape that fact.

But even dark men can be faithful, if the love is real. That's another painful nugget for him to chew on. Thank God he's so tired right now his thoughts don't gain much traction.

After ten minutes, Maxie comes back into the room. Johnny can't look at her without smiling, his mouth going dry, and his dick getting hard. He used to play all these reactions off, acting like he wasn't into her in the least. Why bother now? He ain't about to fool her anymore, if he ever really did.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Maxie's eyes linger over Johnny's naked body, as he sits on the couch, his head laying back, looking completely exhausted.

Scratch marks are etched over his chest and discolorations are starting to form on his neck. A small smile curves on her lips as she realizes the marks she's left on him will linger for days. Maxie leans down and gives him a peck on the lips, meaning to dart away right after, but his hand grab her hips and hold her still. His mouth opens, deepening the kiss. Her body flushes with heat but she pulls away before the spark turns into a fire.

Their eyes hold. He says "Bad day. Good night. At least it evened out."

"You call that good? I can think of so many more appropriate words. Fucking phenomenal works."

The grin she loves, the one that tugs just at the corner of his lips, reappears. She regards him coolly, her mind and heart not really in this moment anymore...though somewhere in the murky middle when he was inside of her she thought _Maybe, this is the start of us_...but she quickly decided that thought was simply her lying heart playing tricks on her again.

He didn't want her when Lulu was around, so he can't have her now that blonde everyone loves first has gone insane. At least...he can't have her again.

"You take care, Johnny boy. Don't mope too long about Lulu. She'll recover some day...probably hear all about this...and then me and you will really have something to cry about."

"You care what she thinks? Damn funny way to show it."

"I care what she tells Spinelli."

Johnny nods. Maxie heads for the door. He calls out "Hey...you need a ride or anything? I could get dressed."

"Don't strain yourself on my account."

"I could have a guard take you."

"And they say chivalry is dead. Never believe the rumors."

"Like I said, I'll take you if you want..." but he doesn't move off the couch.

"Forget it. I'm good." Her head closes on the door handle.

He jumps up and heads toward her. "Hey, Maxie..." his words die out as he simply stares at her.

"There's nothing left to say, Johnny. You don't have to pretend this wasn't just _hot and fun _fucking."

"Yeah, it was," he stands right in front of her. "But...we're not strangers who met in a bar...you can stick around if you want."

"I got to go. Mac worries."

His eyes search hers. He stands there nude, without any shame, and Maxie has to work hard to resist the urge to pull him into another kiss. Its always thrilling when the roller coaster ride starts... its just the bumpy ending that gets to her, when emotions creep in and everything she's ever done wrong slams down on her chest like a vice. She'd like to get home and fall asleep before that happens_._

_Hurry, hurry...rush, rush...get away from him while you still can_, she tells herself.

She turns back to the door, his hand reaches past her to grab the handle, as his mouth comes down on her neck, giving her one last kiss right on the pulse point there.

He whispers "You ever need someone to get you through a bad night, call me...I'll pay you back."

"Oh, I just bet you would," she answers, as a smirk comes over her lips. He pulls open the door and she walks out, sure this will be their one and only time together.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

**Eight Months Later**

**May 2009**

He feels her enter the room before he sees her.

Johnny breaks his conversation in mid-sentence with Claudia and turns to look at the doorway of The Haunted Star. Just as he expected to see, Maxie is there, looking gorgeous as hell in a strapless blue dress. Its a short, flowy number, from some kind of big time fashion label, of that he is sure, but who knows which one. Who cares? All he cares about is the moment when her eyes connect with his and a small smile plays on her lips.

His gut clenches as he is hit with an onslaught of erotic memories from their night together. There is not one single time he can be in the same room with her without having this happen. He sees every second behind his eyes...teeth scraping skin, his fingers tweaking rosy hard nipples, her mouth wrapped around him...her breasts bouncing. _Damn, _its enough to drive a man insane, and this man is not looking to have that happen to him any sooner than it has to.

After their night together it didn't take Johnny long to go looking for Maxie...looking to have a little more no- hold bars fun...but he found out she had other ideas in mind. She only giggled at the idea of them hitting the sheets again, saying _"Don't be greedy, Johnny. Its not a good look on you." _He figures that had been Maxie's way of getting back at him for all the times he pushed her away and picked Lulu instead.

It stung. But they don't call pay back a bitch for nothing.

She moved on to Matt, some punk ass doctor from General Hospital that Johnny can't stand. Because the guy thinks he's slick. He's not. Johnny had his number from day one. The stand up guy image is just a front...he's a fraud...takes one to know one, it seems, and Johnny recognized from jump just what kind of guy Matt is.

It pissed him off to see Maxie taken with the guy. Though Johnny doesn't sit around crying in his beer over it, he screws his way through a few nurses at General Hospital instead, he does do a slow burn over the situation. Especially since Maxie decided that even though they couldn't fuck anymore...friends was a good idea. So they go to Kelly's for coffee, and the Metro Court for dinner, and Jake's for drinks about once a week, when her boyfriend is working the nightshift. What he don't know won't hurt him none.

But Johnny does want to hurt Matt. Johnny thinks he should always get what he wants...thinks he is entitled to it...and since Matt can't see fit to move out of the way, Johnny decides to push him. Being the son of a powerful mob boss gives Johnny all the resources he needs, briefcases full of cash can buy just about anything you want...a false arrest on cocaine charges, a meritless medical malpractice suit or two might spring up, a sexual harassment claim could come to light. There are many easy ways to ruin a man.

Johnny considered all his options over the months, as he told himself he didn't really care who Maxie sleeps with, until one night when she asks him to join her in Sam McCall's hot tub and Johnny's will power snapped. It was all he could do to keep from pulling her onto his lap and grinding her soft, wet center against him. The next day he decided to get rid of Matt from Maxie's heart for good. Luck was on his side because Claudia heard through Jason Morgan that Matt and Liz Webber were sneaking off to supply closets during their shifts.

Such a bad boy that Matt. That will cost him.

Johnny smiled when he heard the news and soon a private eye was snapping photos of the doctor and nurse, soapy and naked in the shower of the locked locker room. _They make such small cameras these days that anyone can be watching anything at any time...people really need to remember that, _Johnny thinks as his eyes move off Maxie to Matt.

Claudia smiles, next to him, and says "You're gonna enjoy this, aren't you? Toppling her world."

"Only way she can fall out of _his_ arms and into _mine._"

"You're not feeling the least bit guilty, are you? My Johnny is really growing up."

A devious grin curves over his lips as he walks across the room to speak to Maxie.


	17. part four, jomax

**Mature**

**Maxie and Johnny**

**Get Down on the Floor**

**Part Four**

**May 2009**

Johnny walks across The Haunted Star to greet Maxie. His eyes devour every wild girl curve of her, the roundness of her breasts and firmness of her ass, and every delicate angel of her, her cheekbones and that sweet spot on her hips that made her moan when he kissed it, as his fingers moved inside of her.

Their eyes stay locked on each other as he walks closer.

She licks her lips, perhaps unconsciously, maybe cause she guesses it drives him wild and makes him hard. He works to keep his desire under control. This ain't nothing new. He's gotten good at not showing her how turned on she makes him over the last eight months.

He was her _hit and run _fuck. She got want she wanted and never bothered to visit the scene of the crime again.

Instead Johnny gets to be her buddy. Yeah, that's not working so well for him so he thinks its about time to say _to hell with_ just friends and _to hell with _her boyfriend doctor. Life is very hard in Port Charles and if Matt doesn't know that yet, he's about to find out.

Johnny touches Maxie's arm, as he greets her, ignoring Matt completely. "You look..." his eyes finished the sentence: _fuckable._

She laughs. "Don't I always?" Though her eyes tease him, her arm is wrapped around her boyfriend's. "Good to see you again, Johnny. Its been a while."

_A day is a while now_? Johnny thinks. But he knows what she is doing. Matt has no clue they hang out.

Matt says "Mr. Zacchara...a nice healthy crowd on your boat tonight."

"Yeah, business is good despite the economy. People just don't know how to control themselves sometimes." Johnny looks at Maxie as he answers Matt, then tells her. "We need to talk. My office for five?"

He watches as her eyes widen in surprise. They are friends on the down low.

XXXXXXXXXXX

_What is he up to_? Maxie thinks.

Its not been easy to juggle the men in her life these last eight months. Not at all. Matt is the jealous type and Maxie is eager for him to think she's plenty different than she really is. So she sneaks to see Spinelli on her lunch hours, gossiping about who he's in love with from afar now and Stone Cold's latest baby mama drama (knocking up Claudia is not sitting well with Liz and Carly at all which really makes Maxie laugh.) Also, about once a week, Maxie spends a few hours with Johnny, while Matt works the night shift.

Matt doesn't mind her seeing Sam, thank God, so she can have one friend he knows about, at least.

Hearing Johnny say _We need to talk. My office for five_? Matt raises on eyebrow. Maxie smiles at him. "About Spinelli...we have to keep a close eye on him for Lulu, you know. Johnny and I wouldn't feel right if we let her best friend fall apart just because she's not around."

"Of course," Matt says "Spinelli does seem the type prone to...needing special attention or maybe a psych

consult."

He laughs. No one else does.

Maxie feels her blood boiling. She longs to tell Matt off but the bigger part of her thinks that if she can keep Matt happy, that's the key to her finally being a halfway normal woman. He's a real good guy and he loves her, she believes.

She has let him love her. She won't break him like she did Cooper. She just has to try harder to not be so bitchy, reckless and destructive.

Every day she thinks about giving up on Matt but then she remembers Cooper...she can't have him back and he really did make her better...but she can have Matt, and he makes her feel like trying to overcome her own bad girl ways. He brings that out of her. Its worth trying some more...right?

But in the back of her mind she is spewing a million curse words at him. _How dare he fucking talk about Spinelli that way? Who the hell does he think he is? I'll bitch slap him into next week._

Matt gets away with the remark though. Cause Maxie's guilt about Cooper, and Logan, and Lulu...and so much more...makes her bite her tongue.

XXXXXXXXXX

Johnny watches as she fights to keep her anger down. He wonders why she is bothering. Does she really think Matt thinking she is a good person makes her a good person?

It don't work that way. Maxie taught him that lesson once and now its time Johnny teaches her it back.

He's held off on really trying to pull her away from Matt and back to him, though he knows he was only a _one night pit stop _for her anyway, but now he is done with pretending naked GH nurses get him as hot as Maxie Jones did.

Johnny wants her back. And he's taking her. By any means necessary. He hopes she can appreciate that she would do the same thing if she was the one wanting him and Lulu was still around to get in their way.

They slip away from Matt and head to Johnny's office. Once they are inside he offers her a seat and then he leans on the edge of the desk, a manila envelope sits on top of it. Johnny looks Maxie up and down. Though they are only friends, they always flirt relentlessly when they are alone together. She knows all too well that he wants her back in his bed.

"You really do look hot tonight, Maxie," his words are low and intimate.

"I always do so what else is new?"

He smiles. "You have quite the little smart mouth on you, Jones."

"My smart mouth is the best mouth that was every on you, Zacchara."

That line sends sensual images bouncing around his brain. He shifts uncomfortably. "You're gonna get yourself in trouble one of these days," he says in a teasing tone "if you keep throwing out those kind of comebacks."

"Its just my style. Deal with it. Just cause you can't have me anymore doesn't mean I'll ever stop making you remember the one and only night that you ever did." She leans forward, her face getting dangerously close to his lap, and says slowly, as her eyes look up at him. "Its called..."

He swallows hard. "Revenge?"

"Justice."

A devilish grin plays on his lips.

She adds "All those times you told me you wanted Lulu...the tables have turned now, Johnny boy." In an erotic, _don't you want me so bad you could die_, tone, she asks "How you like those apples?"

"I don't." He grabs the envelope off the desk. "You need to look at this...but when you do...remember...I'm your friend...not just the guy who ...would take you back to bed in a hot minute."

Her eyes fill with concern as they dart to look at the envelope. She tries to play it off. "What's that? Nude photos of you? That won't make me dump Matt for your sexy ass, Johnny. Besides don't you have a nurse to screw tonight?"

"Nope. I have a life to save tonight...and its yours."

"So dramatic, ohhhhh." She stands up. "I have to get back to Matt. This has been a real waste of time and he's gonna be suspicious now. Thanks a lot, Johnny. Good job." She heads for the door.

Johnny rips the pictures out of the envelope. "Look!"

Maxie grabs the door handle. He rushes across the room. She opens the door. His hand hits the door, slamming it shut, and trapping her between him and it, a repeat of how they were when she left his Penthouse eight months before. "You got to look at it, Maxie. Since when are you so chicken shit?"

Her voice is teary when she asks "Why are you trying to ruin my best chance at happiness since Coop? I've ruined all my others. Now you want to take a turn, too, huh. Fuck off, Johnny."

"You so scared to turn around and face the truth? That's not the girl I know."

She spins around, looking in his eyes instead of at what is in his hand, "The girl you know is nothing but a whore!"

He runs his hands through her hair and leans his forehead against hers, as she sucks in unsteady breaths, "No, Maxie, don't even go there. That's Matt talking, not you. You weren't ashamed of what we did that night...then you got caught up with him...and now you hate yourself. You think he's Cooper for you? Tell me...did Cooper really make you feel dirty like this?"

"Never."

"Matt's not your man." Johnny steps back and brings the photos up, to where she can't help but see the image of Matt and Liz screwing.

After a long moment of looking at it, Maxie's eyes glimmer with all of her old spark. "I'm going to fucking kill that cheating pig!" She grabs the photos and storms out of the office.

Johnny smiles. "Now, there's my girl."

He follows her into the casino again and watches as she heads over to Matt. Maxie waves the photos and then screams. Johnny's loving the show. Her eyes catch his and she smiles. Her heart isn't broken. She's free again, alive again.

He walks towards them but then hears Luke yell "Gun!"

Everything starts to move really slow. Maxie turns to look at Johnny, just as bullets spray around the room.


	18. part five, jomax

**Mature**

**Maxie and Johnny**

**Get Down on the Floor**

**Part Five**

**May 2009**

Johnny follows Maxie into the casino again and watches as she heads over to Matt. She waves the photos and then screams. Johnny's loving the show. Her eyes catch his and she smiles. Her heart isn't broken. She's free again, alive again.

He walks towards them but then hears Luke yell "Gun!"

Everything starts to move really slow. Maxie turns to look at Johnny, just as bullets spray around the room.

He dives toward her, pulling her to the ground. She shivers against him as the automatic gunfire is suddenly cut off right after the sound of a smaller gun being fired sounds. _Pop. Pop. Pop. _

Johnny pushes her hair out of her face, looking into her eyes. "Maxie, girl...tell me you're all right. Maxie!"

Though they are looking right in each others eyes and he can see she's not shot, something in him doesn't believe it. He's sure she will die, like his mother did, as he watches her fade away. Only now does he see how much she's comes to mean to him. He always wanted her in his bed, but he never knew she got in his heart.

Maxie's arms snake around him, hugging him close, even as other people stumble to their feet, and others scream for help, and Claudia cries "JOHNNY! Where are you?"

"I'm fine, sis!" He doesn't move away from Maxie though. He asks "You're not hurt, right? Tell me you're not hurt."

Maxie holds onto him so tightly that their rapidly beating hearts are pressed together, and he doesn't know who's is beating faster or who is shaking more. She whispers in his ear "I'm alive and so are you...which is weird cause I always lose the guy I want most."

He pulls back from her, ignoring the chaos around him. "You over Matt that quick? Damn, you don't waste time." He helps her to her feet.

They look at the bloody scene around them. Matt is helping to treat people who were shot. Claudia is crouched next to Luke, holding his hand, as blood pools beneath his thigh. Johnny spots a makeshift tourniquet tied around his leg, made from the silky red scarf she had been wearing.

Johnny wraps his arm around Maxie's waist. She leans into him. "I'm over Matt...that whole thing was bullshit...a big waste of six months...he was never good enough to be compared to Coop but after what happened with Logan...and watching Lulu lose her mind...I thought I needed the safe choice. Look at this scene though...Port Charles will never be safe...so what does it matter what I do? Huh? We're all gonna die young no matter what anyway."

He lets out a long breath. He knows he should stick around and answer questions for the cops but Johnny just wants to be alone somewhere with Maxie. She needs him and for months now...he has been needing her just as badly. He takes her hand. "Lets get out of here."

They make it over to Claudia, walking past plenty of people who are traumatized and a few who are bleeding. After an ambulance comes for Luke and some of the others, Johnny is finally able to take Maxie to his car. Cops show up but not Mac, so they are able to sneak away.

He is parked behind the building, in the owner's spots. All the cops and police are in front of the building.

Sitting behind the steering wheel he says "We're going to my place. I need a drink and I...need to hold you again...finally..." he looks in her eyes. "Just hold you this time. We skipped that part last time. That okay with you?"

She nods, as her eyes get teary. Her hand comes up and cups his cheek. "I don't know how to live in this town anymore...I feel like I have permanent post traumatic stress disorder and should buy bullet proof vests in every color."

"I know, Max, I know. This town is always gonna be dangerous and I'm always gonna be one of the most dangerous parts of it...I don't know how to live with that either...do I embrace it? Or do I slit my wrists and just get it all fucking over with already?"

"Don't say that!"

Johnny leaned close to her, until he was nearly kissing her. "Do I just kiss the girl and say fuck it to everything I can't change? Do I...hate myself for wanting you...knowing it could kill you...knowing you might lose me and your mind...or do I just fall all the way in love with you...stop fighting the inevitable...and let the chips fall where they may? What do you think?"

Their lips were only a breath apart. "I say...kiss the girl."

His mouth collides with hers.

For Johnny Zacchara it's this woman who remains his sweetest sin. For Maxie, he has been downright cruel to Lulu and Matt. He has been kind to Spinelli and Sam- just because it makes Maxie smile. He has been just her friend, even when he wanted more, and he has been just her fuck, when that was all she was offering.

With Maxie he can be what he is not with anyone else. But he does not have to be a better man. She knows he's a wreck. So is she...but sometimes the bad boy belongs with the bad girl, not the good one.

Sometimes dark and messy and wrong...turns out to feel just right.

Johnny pushes Maxie against the car door, breaking his word to just hold her, but hell with it, he's a liar at heart. She smiles when he starts to unbutton his shirt and then tosses it in the back seat. He knows they should wait, give her time to process losing Matt and finding herself again, and all the trauma of being shot at, but he wants her right now and finally...he can have her again.

Her eyes dance with desire for him, her breathing gets more and more shallow. His mouth moves to cover hers again, reveling in being able to taste her once more, and her arm wraps around his neck, pulling him indecently close. She breaks the kiss and asks "Condom?'

He nods.

Maxie smiles. "I love a man who comes prepared for random sex."

He pushes up her skirt, finding a thong. "I love a woman who dresses for random sex."

His finger slides over her, causing her to grow wet. He lets out a low moan. _Damn_, he thinks, _I missed this. _Being close with her, caressing her, playing this crazy game with her...wondering if its a game at all. He keeps running his finger up and down her, as he leans close and kisses her neck.

"Johnny..." she breathes out his name. "Ohhh...what's that they say...oh...about...saving someone's life? Oh God.." Maxie moans as his finger slides into her. "I think I...oh my God...Johnny! I think I..."

"Stop thinking."

"You'll like...this..._fuck...that's good, _Johnny."

He smiles against her hair. Then slowly licks across her collarbone. His finger keeps a steady pace in her.

Maxie says "You saved my ..._oh...yes...there_...you saved my life..._oh! oh! _So, Johnny boy...I belong to you_...forever_." She digs her nails into his shoulder and bucks against his hand.

He whispers into her ear "Works for me, Maxie."

**THE END**


	19. Life Among the Dead, Naudia

Nikolas and Claudia. The title of this comes from the song _Bring Me to Life by Evanescence. _

**Life Among the Dead**

**Part One**

**June 30, 2008**

The whiskey goes down harshly. Even after four double shots, it doesn't get any easier to stomach. This is not his usual drink of choice.

His glass is usually filled with well aged scotch, its buttery smooth delicateness sliding over his tongue like an expensive sin, one he repeats nightly. Except tonight. Tonight its just Jack Daniels and a bar stool at Jake's. The dirty, dank look of this place fits his mood perfectly.

Nikolas refuses to go home till dawn, till he is exhausted and the sun is high above him again, chasing away all the shadows. Chasing away _her. _

No, not Emily.

The times he does see Emily now, she looks at him with accusing eyes. _You replaced me already, _she seems to say. She doesn't speak to him anymore. Just appears and disappears quickly. He's started to dread her ever coming back again.

He used to look for her ghost everywhere...until Claudia ruined Emily for him, just like she ruined Nadine. She's good at ruining things and doesn't even try to hide that fact.

Like this moment, Claudia is ruining this for him too. Invading his mind when he should be thinking about his dead fiancee.

Five years ago today was the first time Nikolas ever kissed her while she was a woman- instead of the shy little girl she was when gave him a kiss on her sixteenth birthday. This should be her day. He longs to drown in memories of Emily.

But Nikolas can't.

His mind keeps circling around to Claudia Zacchara instead...the self proclaimed darkest woman he will ever meet. And she is. She's as dark as a midnight nightmare. Every time he sees her, he stiffens, his body going hard and his heart betraying his mind. His heart races at the sight of her. His blood grows thick in his veins. His mouth aches because it is so dry... his will power weakens...his lustful soul begs him to bring his lips to hers, suck moisture from her, taste all she's offering when she smiles at him, when she says they are alike...both so tormented.

Yes, they are both tortured souls. They were like that long before they ever laid eyes on each other. But now, she's the one tormenting him the most. Its Claudia that causes his nights to be sleepless. Its not any curse from his past or long lost dream that keeps him pacing the floors. Its her, and the knowledge she can make him want her, when he should not.

Every day she breaks the law, without remorse, and every night she goes to bed with bloody hands. Worse ...she will not stop. This is her way to get power. Its what she was born into.

Yes, they have a lot in common indeed. He was born into a family of power hungry killers too.

He looks in Claudia's eyes and sees someone who knows madness is always only one breath away. That beating your demons today does not guarantee you can beat them tomorrow. He sees a sensual, breathtakingly radiant beauty who he craves more than his next breath. There will always be more air to suck into his lungs, but the chance to sink himself into Claudia is rare.

Still, Nikolas does not enjoy wanting her so much. She's not who he should bring into his life. A pretty girl from a well respected family...that is what he needs for his son. Even Gia was that. She might have been fiery but her morals won out against her greed in the end. Emily was above reproach, in his eyes, even if in few others. And Nadine...so light...she's who he _should _want.

The image of Claudia, her nude body laying on silk sheets, sweeps through his mind, pushing out the thought of all other women. _Damn it_. She's behind his eyes every time he blinks. Is there no escape to be found from her?

"Coleman! Another.'

"Whoa, there, Prince. I called you a cab. You don't look right. Female troubles? Tell Uncle Coleman. I'm a good listener."

Nikolas throws two hundred bucks on the bar. "I'll have the bottle." The look he gives Coleman says not to even try arguing or else the bartender would end up with his head split open.

The Cassadines are not known to make idle threats, not even silent ones. Coleman passes Nikolas the bottle of Jack Daniels.

"Have a good night, Prince. Don't go hurting nobody. Especially yourself."

Hurt someone? No. That is not what Nikolas wants to do. He wants to finally drive Claudia, the dark haired, dark eyed, exotic mob princess, out of his mind once and for all. He wants to fuck her until she screams. Flip her over and repeat the whole exorcism again. Work her out of his blood, leech her from his bones, rid the fantasy of her from his head...free himself of all his wonderings about what it would feel like to be inside her.

Then, just maybe, Nikolas will be able to purge her from his heart, mind, body and soul forever.

Because Claudia is not someone to sit in a filthy bar and dream about falling in love with on the night when he is supposed to be remembering his one true love. She's not that kind of woman. He would do well to remember that from now on.

Nikolas vows to start trying to do that in the morning. Tonight...he will have her.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Claudia sits at the desk, in the living room of her Penthouse, looking at paperwork. She doesn't spend her nights watching TV or reading novels. She works. It is the only thing that keeps her mind occupied enough to not drift back into her past...not feel hands shoved down her panties that don't belong there...and not to look into her future...and see the black, empty road that stretches out before her. Work keeps her mind off all she will never have.

No man. For she will never let herself believe love exists. No babies. For no child deserves to cry its first tears in her arms...born the child of a mobster. That's a cycle she will break and teach Johnny to break. Their blood line is tainted with insanity, it can not be allowed to create another generation to hold prisoner in its crazy grasp.

She focuses on what she knows she still has- the only thing she can allow to matter to her- her business. Not her Daddy's business. Hers. She's running prescription drugs through town and making a fortune doing it. Finally she is subordinate to no one. She's running this show, and she's damn good at it too.

Not even Johnny knows about what she is doing. That's because it is she who takes care of him, not the other way around. That's her boy. She will protect him from everyone, even herself.

Does it get lonely? Does she want somebody to hold her close? Someone to fight on her behalf , to stand beside her? Damn straight.

But she's smart enough to know she can't have that. The only man in this town that even comes close to understanding how she thinks, what she craves, that this is her fate and not her choice, is Nikolas Cassadine. But he can not be hers.

She's thought about it enough to know that much is true now and will always be true.

He has his hands busy with his clinic, and his blonde nurse, and his pre-schooler son. A nice normal life...Claudia has never been a nice, normal woman so she can't see how she'd fit in his world. Not that she hasn't tried to bend the angles in her mind a million times since she spent the night at his place. But all the twisting and turning in the world doesn't make her fit in his life...and if she did...that would be the most dangerous thing of all for her.

She licks her lips, as she thinks about him. His dark eyes flash through her mind causing her to shiver and bite her bottom lip. She'd like nothing more that to take the launch out to Wyndermere dressed in only a black trench coat. Push him back on the couch, not caring if the servants wander by and get an eyeful, crawl onto his lap, kiss him until he moans and his hand loosen the belt of her coat, finding her naked and ready for him.

But she won't.

If he was some other guy, Claudia wouldn't think twice. Even if he was engaged, married, or recently widowed. She takes what she wants without worrying about how many hearts she tramples along the way, not caring who she breaks into pieces.

But with Nikolas it's different. The heart she fears breaking is her own. Its a very good thing, she reasons, that they don't belong to the same world. If only she could remember that more often when she sees him, instead of her typical reaction: a bone relaxing relief and the thought running through her head of _Oh, its you again. Good. I've spent all day longing to run into you._

For that is not a reaction befitting the kind of cold hearted bitch Claudia knows she is...and knows she needs to stay.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Its strange how his manners don't falter even when he's drunk. _Uncle Stefan would be so proud, _he thinks, as he tips the cab driver handsomely and then walks, without even stumbling, inside the building. He rides the elevator up to the top floor and knocks politely, instead of beating on it like the mad man he feels like he is rapidly becoming.

Because of her. This is all because of her. Because she looks at him and dares him to want to live again, love again, dream again. Why can't Claudia see he's done with all that? Why can't she keep her smiles sad and her eyes bitter, like they are for everyone else but Nikolas?

He stands there shaking slightly as lust pulsates through his veins.

The idea of her opening that door, surely dressed in something tight and short, leaves him nearly panting. He hears her say his name, and realizes she must have just looked through the peep hole, a second later the door opens.

She smiles at him, with true warmth in her eyes, and that only makes him more crazed. Can't she see they are so wrong for each other? He knows she sees it. She's an intelligent woman, after all. Does Claudia not care about that fact? Should he follow her lead? If they both become reckless where will they spiral into?

He plans on finding out. Or ridding himself of her once and for all. By morning he will know which one it will be.

"Nikolas...the crown prince of the Cassadines...what brings you knocking on my door? Not that I'm complaining. But don't you know better than to court disaster?"

His hands raise, cup her neck then slide around to the back of her head, pulling her toward him, as he breathes out, under his breath, with the intensity of a curse word "Apparently not."


	20. part two, naudia

**Life Among the Dead**

**Part Two**

**June 30, 2008**

He tastes like whiskey on her tongue. The first kiss he gives her only makes her want another, then another, and another as they stumble inside together and she kicks the door close.

His mouth never leaves her, which is a good thing because Claudia would surely chase Nikolas down to seek out more of these hot, wet, needy kisses that he is giving her. He's kissing her like she's his oxygen. She's never felt this vital to anyone's survival before.

Three kisses in and Claudia becomes an addict. Her drug of choice is his mouth on hers. She would murder to get another one of his kisses.

There is no denying that he is a threat to her heart. But she wants him anyway.

Claudia has wanted Nikolas since the first time they kissed, during those intense life changing days when she was his guest on his private island, when he pulled her back from the brink of death. Claudia's mind has played out this fantasy time and time before. He's at her door late at night, looking to fling himself completely into the dark abyss where she lives, looking to take her- hard, fast, rough, relentlessly- before he talks himself out of it. But the Nikolas of her dreams does not come anywhere near being as intoxicating as the Nikolas who's flesh she digs her nails into right now.

This man is her match and her opposite all at the same time. Her temptation. Her salvation. Her downfall. He's an agglomeration of everything she craves and fears in this world. He may very well end up being deadly for her. For she will die if she falls in love, of that she is sure. _Love kills independence and without independence I am nothing, _she thinks.

But that thought is not enough to make Claudia push Nikolas away. She instead smiles against his lips as he yanks her even closer to him, till they are indecently mashed together, and she can feel the hard length of him against her. She tries to control their kiss then, fighting him for the lead, but he's made up his mind, she quickly realizes.

Nikolas is in control tonight.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

She tastes like heaven but Nikolas is sure Claudia's so much closer to the devil than that. She does not lie about how dark her life is, her heart is, her mind is, and that, damn her, causes him to be even more intrigued by her, instead of less.

She's hypnotic. She's some kind of witch, he's sure, working voodoo on him. She calls out to him from across this filthy little waterfront city...until he has no choice but to imagine her, just like she is now, in a tiny red dress and stiletto heels, her eyes filled with heat and her body sweat slicked.

Claudia has forced his hand, he would swear to this on a stack of Bibles. Somehow, in the times when they bumped into each other around town, she has put him under her spell. Used black magic on him. She's trying to make him her slave. And hell if she isn't succeeding at it too.

That angers him. He wants to make his own choices. All his life he had to live by his family's rules until he finally reached manhood and then all he did was lash back at them...and always by fucking the one woman that would make them all pale. Too old for him. Too wild for him. Too married for him. But he took them all _for him_, made them all _his own. _

This man was born entitled. No one will make him bend to their commands ever again.

Not even Claudia. So when she tries to slow down their kisses, Nikolas only doubles the intensity, his tongue battling with hers till he gains dominance again, and she lets out a stifled moan.

He finally pulls back and allows her to breath. Her lips are bruised and swollen. "Lead me to your bedroom now..."

When she only stares back at him, slightly dazed and trying to get her bearings, he snaps at her "Now, Claudia."

Her hand slides into his and she takes him down the hallway. As soon as they reach her room, Nikolas pushes her against the wall outside. He presses close to her, his body rubs against her curves, her hard, pointy nipples stab at his chest, sending fire shooting down his body till it pools in his groin. "Is anyone else here?"

She shakes her head, no.

"Good. Then you can scream all you want." His mouth attacks hers again, sucking on her tongue, while at the same time he pins both her hands above her head.

Nikolas closes his eyes but Claudia is right there in his mind...no one else...only Claudia still. Its as if she owns him now. But if anyone is owning anyone tonight...he wants it to be him owning her.

XXXXXXXXXX

_Damn, I had no idea, _Claudia thinks to herself.

He kisses her with a fierceness that leaves her throbbing for him to hold her down and make her beg for more. She's his possession now.

Claudia knew that Nikolas was a man not to be messed with...his eyes alone warn of just how dangerous he could be if pushed too far...but she didn't know he could be so commanding. It must be the royalty in his blood.

The world is his for the taking, and tonight the part he wants to take is her.

If he stays this way, keeps kissing her like she's just some disease he wants to work out of his system, she will survive this night unscathed. She will get what she wants most- their bodies withering together till neither can remember their own name- but won't lose what she fears most...her heart.

_That__'s what I want_, Claudia tells herself_, Just to fuck him. That's all._

She's always been such a liar.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Her dress doesn't cover much. But its covering entirely too much of for Nikolas, all the same. He peels it right off her shoulders, and sends the red fabric falling to the floor. Beneath it she wears a thong and matching bra- red, of course. Just like in his fantasies. Only now she's real and in front of him, taking in short little gasps of breath, her eyes searching his.

Her body is pure sin but those eyes...they're just soft and broken. One tender look from her and his illusions about this not being emotional fall away. She isn't just any woman...she's Claudia...she nearly died and he saved her...she confessed her secrets and he kept them...she's stayed away because he has a son and he has missed her... he's hated that he misses her and has tried to stop but failed...she haunts him and her eyes show she knows things about him she never was supposed to discover.

(_How can you see _

_into my eyes _

_like open doors?_

_  
Leading you down_

_into my core  
where I've become so numb_)

Nikolas stands there, breathless and lost in his own mind, at the sight of her nearly nude body. His eyes rake up and down her. Claudia flings herself back into his arms. She kisses him quickly, her tongue glides along his teeth, her fingers press against the length of him, her strokes frantic, she's not letting him think too much...that way he won't feel too much.

This will work much better if they both stay detached.

(_Without a soul _

_my spirit_

_sleeping somewhere cold _

_  
Until you find it there and lead it back home_)

Her pushes her back against the wall, and breathes his words into her ear "Bed now or I'll take you right here in this hallway."

_Stay cold, Nikolas, _he tells himself. _Get her out of your system not into your heart._

He would say his chances of doing that are slim- very, very slim indeed. He hasn't felt this alive in years...not just months...years. Darkness just might suit him after all.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

She goes completely wet when he says he'll take her against the wall. But that's not how she wants him...having to keep half her attention on if the front door opens...having her brother and his sister walk in on them...no thank you...she wants him locked in her room. So Nikolas can do as he pleases with her for as long as he wants.

Taking his hand she leads him inside her bedroom, as she turns the lock, he stands behind her, kissing her neck and then doesn't let her turn back around. She's pressed with her breasts against the door. He unhooks her bra, but since her hands are pressed flat on the wood at shoulder level the bra doesn't fall off.

Nikolas slides his finger over her thong in a slow, measured way...as if he plans to take hours and hours slowing bringing her to the edge and then away and back and away until she's weeping for release.

Claudia starts to tremble at the thought that his finger will soon slip inside of her. Nikolas moves achingly slow, tracing the line of her thong and when he runs his finger up and down her heated core, Claudia lets out a soft moan. She never knows what he will do next. Order her to do this or loving caress her like that. It makes her head spin.

She feels like she is with two different men, but she's just with a tortured one. Caught between who he really is and who he thinks he should be. She's his crime and his punishment...but she's loving ever second of it too much to complain. They both have issues that make them less than perfect; she'll be his cure, if he will be her drug.

Her head tosses back when his thumb caresses her clit- the hypersensitive nub of nerves, his plaything. She whimpers when his finger moves away.

Claudia bites her lip so hard she thinks it might bleed. Nikolas scraps his teeth over her neck just as his finger plunges inside of her. She whispers his name, softly chanting it beneath her breath, and he tells her "You will scream for me before we're through."

She has no doubt about that.

(_Wake me up  
Wake me up inside_

_  
I can't wake up._

_  
Wake me up inside._

_  
Save me._

_  
Call my name and_

_save me from the dark_)


	21. part three, naudia

**Life Among the Dead**

**Part Three**

**June 30, 2008**

Claudia realizes sleeping with Nikolas is a very bad idea just as her body shudders and an orgasm rocks through her. He wants too much. More than she has...more than she wants to give...he's trying to take her very sanity from her.

She's pressed with her breast rubbing against the door of her bedroom, trapped between hard wood and Nikolas. He nibbles on her earlobe, dragging it between his teeth over and over, biting just a little harder at certain times, till the pleasure and pain blend and she can't be sure which he is trying to inflict on her. She doesn't care. It feels too good to ask questions. His fingers move over the wet heat between her thighs, his rhythm insistent..._you're mine, you're mine, you're mine..._it seems to say..._just accept this...you are not in charge anymore_.

She loves her control, except in the bedroom, there she wants the man to push her down, take her on, make her scream. She's always liked it best a little rough. And Nikolas was that way...till one minute before she came...and then he starts to lightly drop kisses over her collarbone, suddenly so much gentler, and whispers into her ear "Succumb...its far to late to resist," and though he could just be talking about right now...his words create a small spring running right through the bitterest part of her soul..._its far to late not to fall in love with me... to not see where this all leads us...its far to late to run,_ is what she hears in his words.

Nikolas keeps his fingers moving inside of her as she shivers to a stunning release. Claudia softly moans the creator's name over and over and over, sinfully praying in vain. "God...God...God..._oh, God_."

_(Wake me up!  
Bid my blood to run._

_  
I can't wake up!  
Before I come undone.  
_

_Save me,_

_save me_

_from the nothing I've become.)_

Before she can even recover from her high, Nikolas scoops her right off her feet and carries her to the bed, setting her down in the middle of the silk sheets. His hands rip down her thong and tosses away her bra.

His eyes slowly lower to appraise her body, lingering on her pink tipped nipples. She leans back on her elbows, watching him slowly undress. Tie, belt, shirt, hit the floor. His chest is muscle ripped, his tattoo the sexiest single thing she's ever laid eyes on.

Claudia is flushed from head to toe, her body hums with a pulsating desire for more of him, but her head is rapidly becoming a cacophony of noises. Her own voice warns her not to let this be anything more than a night of sensual bliss. Anything more...anything more at all...and she will end up just as insane as her parents ever were...as Nikolas' parents ever were...they are both born of madness, they both could slide into it without a very hard push.

Still Claudia will not stop this.

For the seconds he is away from her, she aches to have his hands back on her once more, caressing her, sliding into her, over her, his mouth marking her, leaving bruises she will cherish later. Nikolas could destroy her...by loving her...and yet she can't quite raise the words on her tongue to tell him not to.

_Love is nothing but a lie...nothing but a minefield...nothing but the surest path to living hell, _she thinks as he walks back to the bed, _nothing but ... _his mouth joins with hers again as he pushes her backward so she lays on the bed.._..a trap._

Trapped. Yes, that's what she is. Willingly. She's way too hungry for him to put up even a token resistance. Claudia feels like a fly, and Nikolas is the spider that has her caught in his web. The only question is now...will she break out by morning?

(_Now that I know what I'm without,  
you can't just _

_leave me._

_  
Breathe into me and make me real.  
Bring me to life_.)

XXXXXXXXXX

She is the sustenance that sustains his existence. Claudia is more than just his air now...she's water, she's food, she's shelter, she's clothing...she's everything he needs to survive this night. Every moan is proof of life.

His hand slides over her stomach, his fingers splayed wide, brushing upward he skims her ribs, firm hands caress her breast- their heavy, hot smoothness something he could easily became addicted to. Claudia arches into him, wrapping her leg around him, rubbing herself against the length of him. Nikolas chokes back a moan. His mouth never leaves hers, as his other hand wraps itself up in her hair, feeling the silky strands enclose around it.

Nikolas started this night knowing he should honor Emily somehow, but Emily...she's not even a consideration for him in this moment. Claudia has the power to beat back every ghost in his head. _I'll feel guilty tomorrow_, he thinks, as his will breaks completely and he moans into her mouth, _The price for feeling alive tonight_.

His thumb rubs over her nipple. She's deliciously hard beneath his fingertip. His hand squeezes the round, full, creamy mound of her breast. Nikolas can not get enough of touching her...she's just what he needs

to smooth the jagged edges of his grief.

_(Bring me to life._

_  
I've been living_

_a lie._

_  
There's nothing inside.  
Bring me to life)_

Jerking his mouth away from hers, Nikolas looks right into her eyes, finding them hazy with lust and confusion. "We've been heading here all along...tell me you believe that."

From the first second they met they have been collision course with each other. The only question had been: _When would the crash come_? He could see that clearly now. Trying to stay away from her had been futile.

She doesn't answer him. Her eyes fill with a fiery, desperate resistance.

Nikolas hisses out "Tell _me_, Claudia. Say you know this was...meant to be."

"Shut up and kiss me some more," she orders, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she gulps in air.

Nikolas slides over her, the tip of himself nearly entering her. His words are throaty when he says "You'll scream out the truth soon enough."

Whiskey fuels his tongue, making him much harsher than he might be any other night. But it can't make him crazy enough to be cruel to her or to not know that this isn't just a coupling of bodies...their souls are getting all tangled up in these sheets ...their hearts are breaking open and letting each other in...or is that just his?

One quick thrust and he buries himself inside her warm tightness. She bites hard on his shoulder at the same moment her nails scratch down his back. He lets out a loud scream, much more pleasure than pain.

"Who..." Claudia pants out the word "screamed...first,...prince?"

He looks down to see her smirking as he starts to move inside of her. She's the most beautiful, sad, crazy person he has ever let have this much control over him. And Claudia does control him...there was no way he could have stayed away from her forever...she's been luring him here for weeks now...just by being herself...just by being so dark...so tempting...so much like all he fears about himself...so much like all he tries to hide in his own soul.

With every stroke, all thoughts of being able to rid his mind of her forever, slip further and further away...till he can still clearly remember why she's all wrong for him...but he doesn't much care anymore.

Its not just how right it feels to have her closed around him, its that Nikolas is sure only Claudia can relate to being alive, but not really _alive. _To walking through life stoically _waiting_ on death, not dreading it, because life only meant more pain, and death meant black nothingness...a preferable fate. She understands being empty. He doesn't have to explain a thing to her, he just pumps in and out of her and it is understood...death can wait. This is something worth living for.

(_Frozen inside _

_without your touch, _

_without your love._

_Darling,  
only you are the life among the dead)_

XXXXXXXXXX

_Sex..._the word stumbles through her, looking for something to latch onto_, its just bone achingly good sex... _those words try to take root in her heart but they can't. Claudia knows a lie when she hears one.

(_All this time _

_I can't believe_

_I couldn't see_

_  
Kept in the dark_

_but you were there_

_in front of me)_

She's screwed men for every reason, but love, all her life. And maybe this blissful, sweat slicked, body rocking time with Nikolas is not full blown love yet...but its somewhere in the vicinity...close enough to hear the warning sirens blaring in the darkness of her mind.

The pain of loving, the pain of losing, the misery and mental illness to follow...haunt her...but she pushes all that down deep, as Nikolas kisses her again, sucking her lips and tongue. She'll be consumed by terror later...maybe...right now she only will allow joy.

_Joy_, she thinks, _That's new_.

(_I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems._

_  
Got to open _

_my eyes_

_to everything._

_  
Without a thought, _

_without a voice, _

_without a soul._

_  
Don't let me die here.  
There must be_

_something more._

_Bring me to life_) (Evanescence)


	22. last part, naudia

**Life Among the Dead**

**Part Four **

**June 30, 2008**

Most people would cuddle afterwards. Claudia Antonia Zacchara does not cuddle. She usually smokes. Tonight, with Nikolas laying next to her, he's breathing hard and looking shockingly good sweat soaked, she pulls the sheet over her breasts and thinks _What the hell did I just do? Did I...fall for him?...No, no, no, I couldn't have...damn it to hell_.

She knows how to do no- emotion sex. She knows love is just a fairytale that ends unhappily ever single time. There are no exceptions. Anyone who tells her otherwise is lying to her or themselves.

Claudia is not a delusional, love stoned, teenager who believes finding the right man can change her life...save her life...but when Nikolas was inside of her, she could have sworn it felt like he was. She reveled in the feeling of him filling her, loved every damn second of it, truth be known.

The harshness, the gentleness, the push and pull of their wills, their tongues tangling, her nails drawing blood on his back, his mouth sucking relentlessly on her neck. Staining her skin with his mark. She let go with him, for him, let herself feel for once...but now those feelings shake her to her bones.

(_Sometimes when we touch  
the honesty's too much  
and I have to close my eyes_

_and hide_

_  
I wanna hold you till I die  
Till we both break down and cry  
I wanna hold you_

_till the fear in me subsides_) (Rod Stewart)

Nikolas rolls onto his side, his eyes search her face, before a sensual grin tugs its ways onto his lips. She swallows hard.

"Hello," he says.

Claudia raises an eyebrow. After making her scream out his name twenty times, now he wants to be formal? "Uhhhh...hi?"

"It was rude of me not to say that when you first opened the door tonight."

"Don't give it a second thought."

He runs his hand down her arm, then takes her hand in his, brings it to his lips and kisses the inside of her palm. "I'm going to buy a case of Jack Daniels in the morning."

She chuckles, unable to resist him, even though she trembles silently inside. "That your drink? Don't tell me you have it on the rocks...straight up is the only way to drink hard liquor."

"I've never had it before tonight. Coleman was out of scotch. But now tasting Jack...its going to remind me of tasting you." He leans close, nipping at her bottom lip.

She places her hand on his chest and pushes him back a little. "You should go. John will be home soon."

"You don't want him to find me here? I understand. Perhaps you would like to come home with me? There's room on the launch for two..." He tries to kiss her again but she sits up, keeping the sheet over her as she does.

"I have meetings in the morning."

He sits up, giving her a look that says she is not fooling anyone. He whispers her name. Her eyes dart away.

(_At times _

_I'd like to break you  
and drive you to your knees_

_  
At times _

_I'd like to break through  
and hold you endlessly_)

She reaches into the drawer of the bedside table, looking for a cigarette but there's just an empty pack. She crushes it and tosses it to the ground. Only then does she realize what else is missing from this scene...a used condom or two or five..._fuck._

Nikolas isn't making any movement to leave. Claudia says, slowly, as the gut clenching fear of being a mother nearly cripples her. "Prince..."

"If you are opening those gorgeous lips of yours to say the word mistake, don't. I'm in too good of a mood to argue the point with you- and I would, Claudia. This wasn't a mistake. It was reckless...it was fast...it was out of order...I don't do really dinner and a movie but we could have gone to the theater or opera or even the Haunted Star first...but this was always going to happen. It only happened sooner than I expected." He yawns as he lays back down. "You locked the door. Your brother will never know who's behind it. I'll sneak out before breakfast."

She sits there stunned by the thought that they didn't use protection. Nikolas might believe they are meant to be...she doesn't know if that's true...how can she know? She's the woman who only started believing in love five minutes ago.

But Claudia does know that her becoming any child's mother would be disastrous. She loves John...he's her boy...that's all the love she can spare for a child...a child looking up at her with questions about why their live is always at risk, why mommy drinks so much and shoots people so often...its unimaginable.

She can't believe she's been so stupid. But she also can't regret all that happened.

Because next to her is Nikolas. So much of everything good in her life right now. He's strong enough to go toe- to-toe with her and sweet enough to hold her when she breaks down. He's a good man. He could be her man...if she would only let him. Can she let him?

"Nikolas..."

She slides down on her side, until they are eye to eye. Or they would be except his are drifting shut. He reaches out, sleepily, and places his arm over her hip, dragging her close to him. He murmurs "Good night, gorgeous."

"Nikolas... you didn't use any condoms."

His eyes pop open and fill with the realization that they had been too caught up in the moment to remember to use any. "Are you...on something? The pill?"

She shakes her head, no.

"We're in this together," he whispers "Whatever happens or doesn't...you are not alone."

"I'm not having a baby! I will never have any children, Nikolas. I won't...I won't...do you know how cruel it would be to bring a child into my lifestyle? Tell me you didn't think of that after the first time you kissed me. Tell me you didn't say to yourself _I'd screw her but let her see Spencer...hell no_."

"I had my concerns, yes. "

"Your concerns, ha." A tear falls from her eye. She turns away from him. "You need to leave. And you better pray to every God that you didn't just knock me up because...I've had to handle a lot of things in my life...but having an abortion isn't one of them...and I know I can't have a baby."

He wraps his arm around her waist, pulling her back against him, and rests his chin on her shoulder. She struggles to get away from him. "No, leave, go, leave now..."

He tightens his grip, slightly, while whispering "Shhhhh. I'm not leaving you alone here tonight with just your demons for company. You wouldn't do that to me, would you?"

Claudia rolls over quickly. She frantically clutches him, burying her face against his chest. Sobs shake her. "I'll be my father who goes crazy...I'll be my mother who can't stop him...my kid will be like Johnny was...standing in the corner...watching as the bullets fly_...what _did we just do? I never do this! I never forget a condom."

She hears a baby crying in her head. Guns blasting out shot after shot. She's screaming, a maniac wordless sound, she's crazy. In her mind, roses fall through the blackness. Then Nikolas holds out his hand to her.

XXXXXXXXXX

He holds her as she cries, until the sobs finally subside.

"I'm so sorry I put you in this position." He strokes her hair, soothingly.

Against his chest, she mumbles, "I blame myself. I wanted this. I wanted you. I should have known better."

"What's wrong with wanting someone so much you lose your mind for a minute? It doesn't mean that you will be lost forever. It doesn't mean...you can't be found again."

With teary eyes she looks into his "Would you come and drag me out of the dark if I was lost?"

"Every single time."

"The thing is that nobody can save another person from their darkness."

He smiles slightly, then kisses her quickly on the mouth. "Think about it. We just proved that wrong."

(_At times I_

_understand you and I see how hard you've tried_

_  
I've watched _

_while love commands you  
And I've watched love pass you by_)

Claudia's dark, wild eyes look into his, and Nikolas holds his breath. Earlier he was in control, but now she holds every bit of what happens next in her hands. She can trust him or she can throw him out.

He doesn't want to wake up tomorrow thinking about how he must start mourning her next. All the grief he will always feel over Emily takes up too much of him already. He'll never let it go completely but he has to let a little go each day because life is for the living...not for living among the dead.

Claudia is life, to Nikolas, at least. She's his gorgeous temptation, his lady in a red dress, his fantasy woman, his real life dark partner in soul searching...she's something to think about other than the past. She might not be his everything but he was wrong when he thought she shouldn't be his anything. She already is. He would love the chance to figure out just how far they can stretch this.

Nikolas can't start a relationship with her alone though. She has to want to try. He waits for her answer, but can't help but adding "If I can't save you from the darkness, Claudia, then I'll dive right in there with you. You will not be alone...if you call out for me, I will come for you."

Her face crumbles. "That would work 'cept I don't count on nobody but myself to save me."

"How is that working for you so far?"

A smirk steals away the sadness on her face. "Okay, yeah, could be better."

He leans over, his lips almost brushing hers, "Yes...life could be better for both of us."

Claudia raises her hand and presses it against his jaw as they kiss. "Nikolas...just promise me...swear on all you consider holy...that if there is a baby...which there probably won't be...but if there is..." she pauses, and he can tell these are some of the hardest words she's ever had to utter "promise me...you got to

_promise me _you will grab onto me with all you have...hold me down...and not let me...break."

"You have my word."

She hugs him close to her. Nikolas smiles into her hair.

_This is how it works_, he thinks_, this is how you go on with life after the one you love with all your heart dies...you grow a second heart and work on bringing it to life...you find someone who makes you think about tomorrow, instead of drowning in yesterday._

(_I wanna hold you till I die  
Till we both break down and cry_

_  
I wanna hold you _

_till the fear in me subsides)_

THE END


	23. Kind and Generous, Jarly

Premise- This takes place when Jason Morgan had a brain tumor. In this, he has pressure on a part of brain and that caused him to wake up one day without any memories. Once he has surgery he will be able to get his memory back. But he isn't sure he wants to risk the surgery. This starts three days after he woke up, on the first day he is allowed to go home from General Hospital. During this time, on canon GH, Carly was suffering a breakdown but she is not in this story.

This is rated mature for sex and extreme language and mentions of death.

Jarly from Jason's POV.

**Kind and Generous**

**Part One**

**September 2005**

_Liars. They are all fucking liars_, he thought, as he sat on the couch, with his laptop fired up and resting on the coffee table. The screen blinked out image after image of newspaper articles that showed just who Jason Morgan really was.

_You are a good man. The best man I know. You are kind and generous. You're so brave...unselfish...strong...wise...you're amazing._ That's what they told him. Every last one of them. His sister. His business partner. His parents. Even his fucking fiancee.

But something felt off. Suspicion crawled along his skin as he listened to them. And all he could think over and over is _That's not me._ But this...what he looked at on the screen, the articles about a killer and a kidnapper and a crook, how could that be him either?

_What the hell kind of monster, am I? _he thought as he screamed at the top of his lungs "FUCK!"

"Jason..." he heard her concerned, loving tone before he saw her coming down the stairs. This one said she was Samantha. He couldn't be sure that was even true though. He'd look into her next. Who knows what else this people had lied to him about.

She asked, as she came down and placed her hands on his shoulders from behind him. "Are you okay?"

His jaw line hardened. The pulse point at his temple pounded painfully. He felt hot and cold at the same time- his flesh burning to the touch, his gut frozen, filled with nothing but bile and disgust.

He stood up. "I need some air."

"Okay. I'll come with you. We'll go for a walk."

"No. I'm going alone." He grabbed his coat off the back of the chair.

"Jason...are you sure that's a good idea?"

It was the way she asked it that set him up. Like he was a child that needed his hand held while he crossed the street."I don't need you to tell me what's a good idea for me. I'm a grown ass man and I'll do whatever the fuck I want."

"What's the matter with you?" she whimpered.

His head was pounding. All he could see were images from the newspaper of all the people he killed. He titled his head and narrowed his eyes at her. "Where's that kind and generous man you were gonna marry?" He motioned at the laptop. "If that's who you really think I am, you better ask yourself if you ever knew me at all."

With that he yanked open the door and left, not bothering to close it. He slammed his hand on the wall outside then punched the button for the elevator. His cell rang. He drug it out of his pocket, on instinct more than anything, and looked at the screen. All it said was _Me_.

A tingling in his subconscious was his only clue that whoever he used to be, the hitman, would have jumped to answer this call. Unsure if he should do the exact opposite or not, he found himself answering it anyway, almost as if he had no control over his own actions. He couldn't ignore _Me_ if he tried."What?"

"Jase."

The elevator doors opened and he walked on, hitting the button for ground level. "Yeah."

He recognized this voice...Carly...he woke up to her holding his hand, to her tears running down his cheeks as she nuzzled him, ignoring all the IV's attached to him. For a second, at first, he thought he was all right. But then she said his name and he had thought _Who's that_?

"I know you just got home," she said " but I can't stop worrying about you. Are you all right?"

_There's nothing right about me. Why would you give a damn about a man like me? _he asked himself.

When he didn't answer she said "I knew it. You're not. I'm on my way over."

"No."

She sucked in a sharp breath, obviously hurt. The sound of it twisted his heart, actually making it throb with an intense pain in his chest._ Damn it all to hell_, he thought. _I can't be getting worked up about her. I got to figure out me._

"You don't want to see me?"

The elevator doors opened and he jogged through the lobby, pushed open the front door and gulped the fresh air, as the door man called out a greeting that he ignored. _Mr. Morgan. Fuck that guy_, he thought.

"I'm not at my place," he said "I had to get out of there. I can't do this with you right now."

He clicked off the phone before she could take even one more breath. He knew one word from her might weaken his resolve to be alone...of all the faces at his bedside he had wanted to believe her most, had trusted every word she said...but Carly was a liar too. She had to be cause nothing she told him about the wonderful human being he was supposed to be was anything remotely like the man who bore his face in those newspaper articles. He wanted someone to blame for what kind of man he was...someone to punch and beat bloody over it...someone to kill.

_Kill, _he thought. _That's right where my mind goes. _

But who could he put it on but himself? He was stuck in the skin of an amoral, reprehensible, gutless mobster. There was no use in even getting all high and mighty about it cause he must not have had a problem with his lifestyle last week. Nah, he liked himself, he bet. Liked that hot little number that warmed his bed. She probably made him come every night. Got him to put a diamond on her finger, hadn't she? He probably liked carrying a gun too. Liked the power, the fear he could bring out of others. Made men piss their pants before he shot them. _Two bullets, execution style behind the ear. Melt down the gun and weigh down the body before tossing it in the lake. _The words went through his mind, he had no idea where they came from.

He walked into the parking garage and pressed the button on his keys. An SUV and a motorcycle beeped. He jumped on the bike and peeled out of the garage.

_Stop acting like a punk ass bitch_, he told himself, _You hate what you are? What you did? Yeah, you probably loved that shit last week. _

Jason wanted to be jaded. Wanted to not give a damn about all the men he sent to an early grave. But their faces swam behind his eyes, flashing black and white like the shots in the paper._ Father. Son. Brother. Beloved husband. _

Why should he give a fuck about them now? They got what they deserved, right? Right. Cause he was a good man...everyone fucking said so.

Coming up: Only one woman can save Jason from himself.

I'm posting two parts at one time because part one had no jarly and was so depressing. But it's the set up for part two.


	24. jarly, kind and generous, part two

**Kind and Generous**

**Part Two**

**September 2005**

He wondered what he liked to drink last week. Beer? Scotch? Well now it was whiskey. Straight up and keep it coming. He needed to blur out his mind again. Get those faces out of there...his family ...his victims...the lies and the truth, the living and the dead.

The bartender said "On the house, man. You don't pay in here."

Jason hated to even think why that was. He pinched his nose.

The doctors wanted him to have brain surgery. He could die on the table or he could wake up like his old, fucking fantastic self. If he didn't have it, then he'd die too. In a few months time, they said. At that particular moment all his options sounded shitty to him.

He would rather die than go back to that freak he was.

"Hey there, Jase."

A soft, heartbroken, tender voice drifted into his ear. He looked over and saw Carly walking toward him. Before she even got to him, he called out, harshly "If I told you to leave right now, you wouldn't, _right?"_

"Are you telling me that?"

Damn it. She was nearly in tears.

"Fuck it. Do what you want." He stiffened and downed his drink. "Another. And get her something, too.

She let out a sigh and sat next to him. Her hand moved to rest on his arm. The feeling of her flesh on his flesh sent shockwaves of pure fire shooting through him. He jerked his head to the side, and they were eye-to-eye. _My God...what else didn't she tell me about myself...about us? _he wondered.

Out of all of them, his so-called family and friends, she was the only one he could even stand to be around. But that upset him even more because he wanted to believe in her...something in him said to believe in her...his own freaking heart, mind and soul were not to be trusted because he knew she had lied to him just as boldly as all the rest of them.

She whispered "Jase."

He felt his groin react to her words as soon as they fluttered off her lips."What do you want from me?"

"I want to help you."

"By telling me lies? Keep your help. I don't need it."

Her face crumbled and he really wanted to shoot himself for hurting her. His instincts said to pull her close and whisper how it would all be okay. But he didn't fucking trust his instincts anymore. He drug his eyes away from her. The moment grew thick with tension until he ground out "Carly...why did you do it? Why did you lie to me like that when I asked...I fucking begged you...for the truth about who I am."

"I don't know what you're talking about. This is your illness talking, not you. I would never lie to you...well, I mean, not about anything big. You always know when I'm telling you a little white lie. You expect it. You get the truth out of me in five seconds. That's how we work. You come and save me...and I can save you back. Let me."

_Save me,_ he thought, bitterly. _Why would you bother? _He took his drink and swallowed it down in on shot. Then he looked at her.

Carly said, as if she could read his thoughts, "I want to help you because I need you. I need you more than anyone else does. And you can't just give up. If you don't want the surgery, we'll find another treatment for you. Me and you...we'll go to Europe...they have cutting edge techniques there."

Her lips quivered; his heart broke.

What he wasn't sure he could feel, he did. He felt all her pain in his bones. He couldn't hate her. It was useless to try. He didn't know why but she's was not like the rest of them for him. He ached- simply because she was sitting there aching. He had to get away from her and fast.

With every single part of him in agony, Jason hauled himself to his feet. "Yeah. I haven't decided about all that yet. Thanks...for coming to check on me." He looked into her eyes, letting out a calming breath as he did. "Thank you," he found himself murmuring again, though he hadn't planned to.

She stood up and before he could stop her, she had her arms around him and her body pressed tight to his, not carrying about all the other patrons who were around. Into his ear, she softly said "Don't walk out. Stay with me. We need to talk this out."

So seductive, this best friend of his, with her sweet words and her eyes full of love. So easy to believe in. Even when he knew she couldn't be trusted. Still parts of him that he couldn't control did trust her. Mix that with the visceral reaction his body had to her, and the booze running through his veins, and it made a volatile cocktail of lust, recklessness and need.

Carly pulled back and brought her hand up to caress his cheek. "Please let me be the one to help you through this."

"You want to help me?" he asked, his tone low and lethal, and without waiting for an answer he brought his lips to hers in a wild kiss that really had no business taking place in the middle of a bar in the afternoon. Like he really gave a fuck though what the other customers thought though.

He was a man living on borrowed time, in the body of a killer who passed himself off as a saint, with a chick at home who looked just perfect but felt all wrong, and this one here who his body and soul wanted, even if his mind wasn't nearly as sure.

So he kissed her. Damn right he did. He kissed her till she was breathless and clinging to him, then he stepped back from her, breathing heavily. The bartender let out a low whistle. Jason gave him a look hard enough to make the man throw up his hands and back away.

Carly licked her lips. Her eyes searched his. "What...what was that?"

"That's how you can help me. You in?"


	25. jarly, kinda and generous, part three

Thanks for taking the time to read this story.- Sara

**Kind and Generous**

**Part Three**

**September 2005**

Fearless. She will not back down. She will not run from him. That's what Jason learned about Carly as soon as he kissed her. She didn't take even one second to decide if she was up for his challenge or not. She simply turned to that asshole of a bartender, nodded and he passed her some keys.

"The room upstairs is all yours, darlin. Got your name on it."

Jason, not feeling quite like himself because of his brain tumor and the fact that he just learned he was a disgusting mob hitman who murdered dozens of people, reacted really quickly to the fact that this Coleman fool was making it out like Carly went up to that room all the time. He reached behind the bar and grabbed him with both hands, lifting him right off his feet. "Apologize to her NOW!"

"Sorry. Sorry. I meant no harm, man."

Carly smoothed her hand over Jason's back. "Let it go."

Jason dropped Coleman.

_What in the hell did I just do? _he thought. _Is that how I handle shit_? _This can't be me. I can't be this guy._

He didn't know what part of his personality was the brain tumor affecting him and what part was who he was. All he knew was he hated himself and the world would be better off without him. He couldn't imagine getting that surgery...for what? So he could go back to being a one-man murdering rampage. Fuck that.

Carly slid her hand into his and tugged him toward the stairs. With his jaw clenched tight, he followed her up to a room and they went inside. She said "This is our place."

"We got a place, huh? Samantha know that?"

"Its not like that."

"What is it like then? And the truth this time. Or just leave. Leave and don't come back around me ever again."

"You don't mean that."

"I don't need another liar to fill my head with bullshit about the wonderful person Jason Morgan is. I can get that from everyone out there. I need the truth from you...I need only what you can give me...or I need nothing at all from you."

He expected her to start crying again and braced himself for that but instead she slid close to him. "Don't you feel anything for me? How can you look at me and not remember?"

"I can't control that. I didn't choose to forget you."

She placed her hand over his heart and he felt his whole body just sway toward her on its own volition."I'm in you, Jase. I'm in here and you know that."

His heart thumped hard underneath her fingers as emotions he couldn't hold back flooded through him- a desperate ache that only she could soothe.

Quickly he brought his hands up to cup her face and leaned his forehand against hers. His tone stayed hard when he demanded "I want answers."

She whispered "About what?"

"What I do to make my money."

"You...you work for Sonny."

"Carly!"

"You're his enforcer."

"I kill people for cash. Say it."

"You kill people to protect our family!"

He let go and her and took a few step back, breathing raggedly. "Tell me about this _family_."

She pointed at him. "Don't say it like that. DON'T."

His eyes warred with hers. "You are the only one I even halfway believe in...tell me now. If you hold out on me...even one word...there will be no reason for me to stay in this town, no reason for me to get the surgery, no reason for me to live. Because who I think I am...that man is worthless to this world."

He watched as she started to shake in fear. He wanted to take two large steps over to her, close the distance between them and hug her until she stopped. Kiss her until she moaned. Fucked her until she screamed.

"Talk to me, Carly."

"You never had a problem with what you have to do to protect us. You knew you had to...for everyone you love. If you don't take out the threats to us...then your enemies will kill us...its that simple. Kill or be killed. You kill for love."

"For love," he spat back at her.

"That's the truth!"

He turned away from her. She wrapped her arms around him from behind, and laid her head against his back, then whispered "I know you are so terrified right now. Its scary to wake up not knowing anyone and find out you're so sick and you need a surgery that's really risky. Its okay to freak out. Yell. Curse. Tear this whole room up. But don't leave me and don't shut me out. You want the truth? I'm the woman who loves you most, understands you best, I know why you have to kill people...you want to blame someone? Blame me. You kill people for me. You could have gotten out but I trapped you...I begged you to take care of me and my unborn son and to be his father...and from that day on you couldn't ever really get out because even after we weren't together I was with Sonny and I needed you to keep us safe. Even when you tried to leave it behind...you couldn't...because of me and our boy."

Jason turned his head, sharply, and his eyes met hers. Both were tear filled. "Michael."

"Did you just remember that?"

"No...I don't know." In the hospital, no one really told him much about his past, just how great he was and how he would get better soon and be fucking great again. They said it so much...he knew they were lying to him or themselves.

"Michael...he's my firstborn...and he's how we became a family. You and me and him, Jase. You promised to protect him for life and that is what you are doing."

"There has got to be another way. There has to."

She walked away from him. He turned to see her digging in her purse that was thrown on the bed. She pulled out a bill. "How about this? You get the surgery and I'll bet you twenty bucks that once you get well, get your memories back, that I can find a way to make your life something you love again. What do you say?"

He shook his head, as a very small smile curved his lips. "Yeah. How you planning on pulling that off?"

"Jase...you've been doing this job for me. And you never complained. But there is a way you can leave it behind if that is what you still want once you're recovered. Me and you and the boys...we'll just ditch Port Charles. We'll go to South America and change our names. We'll be free. I can give you that. I will give you that." She pushed the twenty dollar bill out toward him. "All you got to do is take it."

He took the twenty bucks and shoved it in his pocket. He still wasn't sure that what she said would really work out but he had nothing else...no one else...he could believe in. He looked at them and all he saw was liars. He looked at her and he tried to see that...but most of him wanted to believe she was the only one who would tell him the truth.

"Why are you taking this all on yourself? Giving up your life for mine?" Jason asked her.

"That's what you would do for me."

"And that's why you care about me?"

"I don't just care...I love you, Jason."

"Because I'm good to you...even if I'm a murdering psycho to the rest of the world."

"You are not that."

"Yeah, I am...and it makes me sick."

"You're thinking of it just as a cold transaction. Like you kill only so you can get rich. I told you its not that simple." She reached in her purse again and pulled out her wallet. She opened it and passed it to him. "Look at our boys. Look at Michael...look at Morgan...you killed to keep them safe. They are worth it. You tell me different and I'll drag you to the hospital right now myself because the man I love knows those boys are worth any pain he has to inflict or suffer through."

He stared down at the photos, his thumb brushing over their faces. Without warning, his body was flooded with the most tender rush of uncomplicated love he had experienced since he woke up without his memories. It was as human as he had felt yet.

Carly could make him feel alive...desperate...hungry for her touch...confused...angry...weak...and protective, but it was only when he saw her children that the full scope of all she must mean to him started to sink in. It was this woman. She was the key to who he was. She had to be, if she could make him feel all this.

Maybe he did kill for her. Maybe she did make him crazy and dangerous and deadly. Maybe she made his hands bloody or maybe he did that all on his own because he just was that cold and callous. Maybe it was simply the only way to keep them all safe...maybe not. But suddenly what had seemed so clear- _I am evil and I should be wiped off this planet_- turned from black and white, to shades of grey. To die meant to leave Carly and the boys behind.

He gripped the photos tighter, as Carly moved close to him. He thought to himself _This is my family. My family. My family. I will do anything for this family. _

She whispered "Jase, I didn't lie to you when you woke up. You are the best man I know. You are not perfect in the world's eyes...you are perfect in mine. So if you hate yourself, you look into my eyes and you'll see nothing but love reflected there. I can make you love yourself again...if you want me to."

He lifted his free hand and drove it into her long, blond curls, holding her head steady and bringing them eye-to-eye. "Yeah...I want that."

She whispered "You can have that, Jase. You can...believe in me."

He had nothing else in the whole world left to believe in.

Jason closed the small gap between them and kissed her with a furiousness that nearly knocked her off her feet. He drug her right against his body, dropping her wallet to the ground as he did. Each kiss was like an electric shock straight to his cerebral cortex and images, in mixed up too vivid colors, started to flash through his head of kissing her in this room before, holding her while she cried, standing next to the elevator at his Penthouse with her...slipping rings on her fingers... looking up at her while she stood at the top of a long flight of stairs, opening his door and she's there, soaking wet and teary...and then they just ended, as quickly as they began, leaving him with no explanations of what each image meant only with the knowledge that Carly had meant everything to him for a very long time.

_How did I let her go? What the hell is wrong with me? _he asked himself, as he jerked his mouth off hers. He had Sam at home. Who did Carly have waiting on her?

He asked "Are you married?"

"Yeah but it doesn't matter."

"Fuck."


	26. jarly, kind and generous, part four

**Kind and Generous**

**Part Four**

**September 2005**

Everything that was black in his head filled with wild mixed up images of Carly, flashing quickly like rapid fire gunshots, as Jason slipped his tongue into her mouth and heard her moan. The whole experience rocked him to his core and he jerked his mouth away from hers.

She felt like she belonged to him. All his. But, without having any proof to back it up, Jason was sure Carly was not really all his.

He asked "Are you married?"

"Yeah but it doesn't matter."

"Fuck," he groaned out the word as he reached for her hand. "Where's your ring?"

"We're having problems."

"Who is he?"

"I don't want to talk about him, Jase. I want to talk about us. About why when everything is hurting in you...you need me. Some people would say that right now I am taking advantage of you...cause you can't remember you wanted to marry Sam and you can't remember what broke us up...but I'm not. I'm trying to love you the best way I know how. If you think anyone else could make you feel what I do...they can't! You need me."

"I know that."

"You do?"

He pulled her back against him again. "Yeah...I do. When I first woke up in the hospital...I didn't know who I was...and I damn sure didn't know the kind of man I am...and I couldn't remember you...but you were there, holding onto me as I woke up...and that felt right. Everyone else who came around...I couldn't trust them...but I trusted you...and it pissed me off when I found out you were lying to me just like they did."

She whimpered "I wasn't. You are all those things I said."

His hands grasped her face and he stared right into her eyes. "You're in love with me, aren't you?"

Carly breathed out "Yes."

"Then why am I with Sam?"

"You love her."

"I know what I feel when I look at you and I know what I feel when I look at her...its not even a contest." He brought his lips towards hers but she stumbled backwards.

Carly whispered "Jase...you wouldn't say that if you had your memories back."

"You're the woman I love. I don't need memories to feel that." He rubbed his forehead. "God, my head is fucking killing me right now."

"Come on...I'm taking you to the hospital." She grabbed her wallet and shoved it in her purse and then headed for the door.

He reached out and took hold of her arm and pulled her back to him. "Forget about that. I hate that place."

"I know you do but I'm not gonna let you die on me!"

"I'm not going to. I will find a way to beat this brain tumor." The promise was out of his mouth before his mind had even decided to give it to her. In an instant, she changed his whole world, his whole way of thinking, and all of his future. He had been sure he didn't want to have the surgery and to be a hitman again...now he was sure he had to live. For her.

Her eyes searched his. "Please, Jase, we have to go now."

"No." He kissed her again, crushing her against him. Carly wrapped her arms around him and for a moment he thought the kiss was going to explode into an animalistic mating where she ripped off his clothes and said _Hell with tomorrow, fuck me tonight _but instead she started to softly cry and the kiss turned tender, as Jason eased away from her. He brushed at her tears with his thumb.

She moaned softly "Don't die."

"I will fight my hardest not to."

"I want you to have the surgery...even though it means you'll stop being in love with me. Its okay, Jason. Even if you forget this day ever happened...it is okay...I will love you no matter what and I will make your life everything you want. Everything. I'll run away with you or I'll watch you go back to Sam. I will do whatever you want. Anything. Because I love you like nobody else is ever gonna love you."

"How long have you been in love with me?"

She broke out into sobbing tears and hugged him. "Oh, Jase. I just wish you could remember us."

"I'm starting to..."

"What? What do you remember?" She took his hand and led him to the bed. They both sat down.

"Not much...a few moments here and there. We've been in this room before together, right?"

"The first day we met."

"That's why this is our place...like you said."

"Do you remember Michael?"

"No...I'm sorry, Carly...I want to."

"You will. Don't worry about it. What else do you remember?"

"Were you...did I ever marry you?"

She shook her head no.

He said "But I planned to. I put rings on your fingers."

"Yeah! You did...its just really complicated. We're very complicated."

"I don't want to mess up your marriage."

She smiled, sadly. "Now that sounds like the Jason I know and love. But you aren't messing it up. It's a mess already. It's a mistake." She brought her hand up to caress his cheek. "You're the man I love most."

After a long moment he asked "Why do I live with her then?"

"Because...because you love her."

"Are you sure about that?"

"I'm pretty sure...yeah."

Jason swallowed hard. "My life is a fucking disaster. That has to change. I don't know who I was before I lost my memories...a cold blooded killer or a decent friend, like you think...but I know I can't go back to being him. I hate him...he makes me ill."

"I _love_ him."

Jason looked down, shaking his head. He covered his face with his hands.

Carly said "Hey...listen to me.."

He looked at her again.

She said "I love who you were and I love who you are...and if you change...I will fall in love with him too...I have seen you through every change...and I come out the other side still in love with you. I'm on your side...always."

"Tell me something then."

"Okay...what do you need to know?"

"You're my best friend. I know you love me...but did I know you were in love with me?"

"I don't know. I was married to Sonny for a really long time...before my current marriage...and you knew I loved him...I did love him...but I just don't know if you believed I loved you more...but I do. You should believe in that."

"Everything is so crazy right now...but you make sense to me."

She smiled brightly. Her voice was cracking when she said "Even when you forget how you fell in love with me...you still remember you love me. See...soulmates. Me and you, Jase. I can pull you through this nightmare. You just hang on to me."

"You're risking it all for me, Carly. Your marriage...your life in this town...your kids future...I don't think I can let you do that. Was I the kind of man who would let you throw away all you have for me?"

"No. But I'm not throwing away anything...I'm getting everything, if it happens, and if it don't...if you wake up from the surgery and love her more...I will still be your best friend and still hold your hand through the rest of your life. Do not think you can lose me, Jase, cause you can't."

He pulled her close and hugged her.

She asked "How does your head feel?"

"Its fine right now...it doesn't hurt as bad...don't worry about it."

"Can we please go to the hospital? Please."

"I just want to stay here. Lets lay down, okay?"

They kicked off their shoes and he took off his jacket, then they curled up in bed together, with her back pressed against his front. She talked softly about their life together, trying to fill in all the blanks for him. After twenty minutes or so, Jason started to lay soft short kisses on her neck.

After three days of living in hell...he finally was getting close to heaven. Fuck the whole rest of the world. He would stay in this bed with Carly for as long as she allowed...this would be his world now.


	27. jarly, kind and generous, part five

**Kind and Generous**

**Part Five**

**September 2005**

When he woke up that morning, all he had felt was confusion rolling around in his head. Every time someone came in his hospital room, they hovered around him like he was on exhibit, with plastered on smiles and lies dripping off their tongues. He knew they were just saying what they thought he wanted to hear._..You will be fine...You're so strong...You've always been such a brave guy_...but he couldn't call them on it cause he didn't know the truth.

The second Sam went upstairs when they got to the Penthouse, Jason jumped on the computer and found out everything no one wanted to say about him. Bile rose in his throat and he wanted to die...like all the men he killed. He didn't even feel like a human being. He felt like a savage, like a disease, like a mistake that needed to end.

If he had his memory, he believed now, he would had known to call Carly to talk him down but he didn't. Still she found him. She fought with him. She hugged him. She cried for him and with him. She let him kiss her, hold her, draw strength from her...she promised to fix his world...she asked for his faith...and before he knew what was even happening he had reached into his chest, yanked out his heart, and gladly put it in her hands.

He wondered now how many times he had done that before in his lifetime. How many times had he given his life over to her?

_Fix me. Love me. Save me. Make me something other than a monster. Make me the good man you think I am_, he thought as he lay behind her on the bed in their room above Jake's. He started to softly kiss her neck, as she rambled on about their life together, and then he nibbled on her ear and her words turned into a strangled moan.

His hand rested on her stomach. His fingers slowly slid underneath the edge of her shirt. Into her ear, he asked "Do you want me to stop?"

"Don't you dare stop."

Jason lay hot, opened mouthed kisses on her neck, sucking her flesh into his mouth, as his hand worked up under her shirt. His fingers first brushed gently over her breasts, finding her nipples hard already. He skimmed his hand over her bra and only when she arched into his embrace did he cup her breast and begin to caress it. She ground her ass back into him and he groaned in pleasure. "I want to fuck you so bad right now. Tell me that I can."

She rolled over and brought her mouth to his, kissing him with an intensity that left Jason stunned. He pulled her more on top of him as he lay on his back and felt her body mold against his, as if she was made just for him.

He felt completely insane before he met up with her today. Wrecked and worthless. But she made each moment turn from one he had to merely survive to one he wanted to live...one he wouldn't give up for anyone. To hell with everyone else. Whoever he had been...nothing but what he could be to Carly now mattered to him.

She moaned into his mouth, right before she broke their kiss. She looked down at him. "I know you need this. And I need this. We need each other, Jase."

"You don't have to convince me. I know that."

Carly smiled and started kissing him again. He placed his hands and her ass and squeezed, she moaned wildly as he did that. Jason broke their kiss and pulled her shirt off her, then his own. He lay her on her back, and started kissing her from the top of her jeans up to her lace clad breasts, then pushed her bra up and let his eyes take in the sight of her. Seeing her totally exposed breasts had an immediate effect on him, making his gut clench and his dick grow painfully hard. His hand massaged one breast while his mouth greedily suckled the other. Her breathing came in short gasps that all sounded like music to his ears. Her hands ran through his hair, lovingly, and he wanted to live again...had to live again...he had already made her promises...he had to stick around and keep them.

_God, I love her_, rushed through his mind, and he was not sure where the thought was born but it was true. He knew it earlier when she said she was in love with him...he just knew as soon as she said those words that it was mutual. He stilled and her soft moans of pleasure died out. His eyes moved up to hers and she looked down at him.

Carly said "I love you...if you can't believe anything else...believe that."

_Always reading my mind_, he thought, _That's really dangerous. How do I hide anything from her? But why would I want to anyway?_

He brought his mouth up to connect with hers, and right before it did he said "I am in love with you. Whatever I felt before...this is what I feel now." His hands slid to the button of her jean, flicked it open, yanked down her zipper hurriedly and slid his hand inside, over her lacy panties. He kissed her as his fingers teased the area around her clit, over her panties, never actually brushing over that hypersensitive bundle of nerve endings. "Carly...its you...its you, damn it..._its you_...do you believe me?"

"Jase..." the word was filled with confusion.

He groaned in frustration and sat up.

She whimpered "You're not leaving me like this, are you?"

His eyes connected with hers, a deep possessiveness filled his gaze. "Never." He yanked off her pants and then his hands went to her underwear. "Yes?"

"YES!"

He pulled them off and suddenly his mouth went completely bone dry at the sight of her, wet and ready for him. He went all the way down to her feet, lifted one and started to massage it, ignoring the ache in his own jeans and his desire to just bury himself in her. Carly and said "Ohh...its been so long since you did that...months and months..."

"Do we...do this? Sleep together?"

"Don't I freaking wish! I'm lucky to get a foot or shoulder massage out of you every six months."

A small grin curved his lips. "That's about to change."

Her eyes lit up even more than they were. He set her foot down and began kissing her up her leg. He spread her legs apart and kissed the inside of her thigh. All her words of love for him swam around in his head as his tongue darted out and swept over the folds of her sex. His tongue worked over her till she was withering beneath him then he slid his tongue inside of her. He didn't know how long it had been since he had last tasted her like this...but it had been way too fucking long for sure. Her moans grew louder and louder.

"Oh, Jase...Jase...fuck...that's so good."

He relentlessly drove his tongue into her, when he finally moved up to suck her clit, his fingers replaced his tongue, hitting the spot inside her that made her hips buck right off the bed. She screamed in pleasure.

He stopped caring that he was a hitman. If that is what she needed him to be, he would. If she wanted someone else...he'd fucking be that for her too...a doctor, a mechanic, businessman, whatever...anything...lover, husband, father to her kids...steal for her, lie for her, ruin himself for her...suffer for her...kill for her...no problem. It was not just having sex with her that turned him into her slave, it was everything...the look in her eye when she saw him, the way she clung to him when they hugged, her whispering in his ear, her faith, her commitment, how she turned him on...how she made him sane and crazy and wise and stupid.

She tightened around his fingers and he licked her clit one last time before she exploded into an orgasm. He kept pumping his fingers into her until she rode out every second of it. Jason climbed up the bed and pulled her into his arms. She lay there, sweaty and satisfied, her fingers drawing lazy circles on his chest. Carly kissed him then and it was the sweetest kiss he could ever remember.

"It feels so right to hold you, Carly. Nothing felt right till you."

She started to kiss his neck and jaw. "More...more...I need more..."

Her hands went to his jeans and she freed him from them. He helped her slide them off and then their eyes met as her hand closed around him. Soon her mouth and her hand were both moving on him and he was spitting out "Fuck yeah...Carly...just like that, girl..."

It didn't take long till he eased her off him, knowing he couldn't take a second more and that he wanted to come inside of her. "Condom?"

"Forget about it."

"Carly..."

She impaled herself on him and he stopped giving a damn about consequences. His hands went to her hips and they started a rhythm. He looked up at her and fell in love all over again. He wondered how many times a day that usually happened and what in the hell kept him from being with her before now?

She moaned, as one hand worked her own breast, "Oh God...yes...yes..Jase...fuck me..."

_There is no way this will be our last time together,_ he thought, _There's no way...I won't let that happen to us._

"So good, Jase. So good...ahhhhhh...I love you."

_Her husband's out of luck,_ he though, _I'm her man now and forever._

_Note- this chapter is inspired by Leonard Cohen's song I'm Your Man._


	28. jarly, kind and generous, part six

**Kind and Generous**

**Part Six**

**September 2005**

"Do you need to get home?" Carly asked, as she lay in Jason's arms above Jake's bar.

"No."

"Jase...I have no use for her, okay? But..."

He stiffened. "You're not doing that to me."

"What? What do you think I'm trying to do? Send you back to her? Believe me...that's the last thing I want but if you could remember..."

"I remember you. That's all I give a damn to remember."

"You'll want more back soon. You'll want our boys and your sister and...you could even want Sam."

He stroked her hair and then her back, till she relaxed against him again. "You call them our boys. Didn't you tell me Sonny is their father?"

"Long story."

"You said you bought me Michael and asked me to be his father...did I turn you down? What was my problem?"

"No. You didn't. You took us in and you made us yours. We just...we didn't last, Jase."

There was true anguish in his voice when he spat out "Why?"

"Long story," she said again.

"I need more than that."

"We were young and we thought we had all the answers...at first...but then we realized we didn't have any and we were in so deep by then...it just became too much pain...the love was always there but the pain was more than we could take anymore...so you pulled away and I went to Sonny. Its so hard to explain but...one day we almost had it all and then one day every mistake and misunderstanding caught up to us all at once and we couldn't be together anymore, you said."

"I said? So this is my fault? Is that what you are trying so hard not to tell me?

"Its not," her tears ran onto his chest. "Its both of us...a big problem is you don't really think we work as a couple...you think its too hard and when you remember that...you'll probably go back to Sam."

"Fuck that."

"Jase...let it go for now. Just let it go and hold me. If you're staying...then lets forget about the rest of the world...lets make right now be all that matters."

He pulled her even closer to him. "You need to be wrong about this. About me changing my mind about us after the surgery. I need you to be wrong, okay?"

"I hope I am."

"I trust you...trust me back."

"I do!"

"This husband you got...can you leave him?"

"I already told you...if you want to leave this town, this country, this hemisphere...I'll go with you. Me and our boys will follow you anywhere."

"Then we're good. We're set. There is nothing to worry about."

She smiled sadly and looked up at him. "God, you used to tell me stuff like that all the time when Michael was a baby and I'd tell you the same thing and we believed it...God help us, we really did believe it... and still I have nothing but faith in you...I can believe another time...I can do that for you."

"Thank you."

They stared at each other for a long moment. He brushed some hair away from her face. "You're so fucking hot." He rolled her on her back. "And you're beautiful and you're sexy...and you are mine, Carly."

Her eyes closed but he saw tears slide down her cheeks. He just didn't know if they were tears of joy or fear.

Everyone else he met since he woke up had only made him feel angry, made him want to run from them or push them away, or curse them out for their lies about how perfect he was. But Carly...she made him want to stay right by her side for life. She made him want to fight to get himself back again...get back the man she fell in love with...so he could prove to her that he did love her back. He had to. It was the only emotion that felt real to Jason in that moment. She was the only real thing in the whole world to him.

XXXXXXXXXXX

**Days later**

"Do me a favor, okay?" Jason asked Carly as he sat in a hospital bed "Go to Jake's when I'm in surgery."

"I can't leave you."

"Go to our place...be there for both of us."

She hugged him and sobbed on his shoulder.

"Shhh," Jason said into her ear "be strong for me, please."

Jason had spent the last few days trying to get his life in order. He went to see the boys, then the Quatermaine's and finally he sat down with Sam and told her that all his feelings had disappeared. He didn't know what he used to feel for her but whatever it was he couldn't access it now. She told him that there was no way she was giving up on him until he had his full memory back and told her they were done. Only then would it be really true.

He learned Carly was married to Lorenzo Alcazar, another mobster, but that they were already talking divorce before Jason got amnesia. Either way, he wanted her out of that guy's house and he wanted it done now, not later. But she said he was away on a business trip anyway and she would talk to him when he got back.

Carly eased out of his arms and looked at him, her face a teary crumbled mess that twisted his heart. "I've loved spending my life with you...and I refuse to believe its over."

"I loved it too."

"You only remember little pieces," she said with a teary smile.

He choked out "Loved those pieces."

She bit her bottom lip and fought off a fresh wave of sobs. She took hold of his face and brushed her lips over his cheek. "You were...you're the love of my life, Jason."

"Nothing is over. I'll make it...for you."

She kissed along his jaw and then brought her lips to his in a shaky, broken kiss that ended with her body wracked with shuddering sobs. She laid her head in the crook of his neck and he hugged her. He said "You got to go now...go...and if..."

"No, please...don't say if."

"Even if I'm not breathing...I am with you, Carly."

She kissed him again. "I'll always be in love with you...okay? Just know that. Remember that much for me when you wake up again."

"I will."

She stood up and took a few steps back. She gave him a little wave, and then turned and fled the room.

His chest rattled with unshed tears and the sound of his own breaking heart.

XXXXXXXXX

**One day later**

He woke up to find his head bandaged and his mother next to his bed, sitting in a chair.

Jason pushed out, his voice thick and sleepy. "Where is she?"

"Who?"

"Carly."

"She's home, Jason."

He blinked and looked at her with confusion.

Monica said "You just need to rest, okay?"

"But I want her," he mumbled before sleep overtook him again.

Hours later, he was awake again, and the doctors had come and gone. He got it out of Emily why Carly wasn't around. Sam and Carly had gotten into a screaming fight that led to hair pulling and slapping and security barring them from the hospital.

Jason gave Emily a long stare and said "I want her back here. Can you do that for me?"

"I'll call Nikolas. He can overrule the security staff."

Jason let out a relieved breath. He knew Carly had to be frantic with worry about him and it was fucking cruel to tell her she had to stay away. He couldn't believe his family let that go down.

Now that his memories were all back, though, he had a lot more understanding and forgiveness for all of them then he did last week. They all made mistakes sometimes...especially him...nothing was black and white, it was all grey. Why he worked for Sonny, why he hadn't killed Sonny, why he called Sonny his family...why he lived the life he did...Sam...Brenda...Courtney...all of it was complicated and all of it was something no one could really comprehend...why he did it all...no one really got that but his best friend.

That was one thing he did know. Carly understood him.

It took another half an hour before she rushed into his room. "Jase!" She looked him over. "You made it...you made it...I knew you would."

"I got my memories back."

"I heard! Wow...that's wonderful...so you remember..."

"Michael...yes. And Morgan. And you._ All _of you."

She sat on the edge of his bed. Carly picked at the blanket, nervously. Her eyes focused on it. "Um...what about the last...uh...week or so? Do you remember that?"

He caught her hands in both of his. Their eyes met and held. "Yeah...I remember it."

Her eyes searched his.

He said "I know I put you through hell."

"What do you mean?"

"I asked you for too much. I was selfish. I'm sorry about that. I needed you and you came through for me. You were the only one who could have...reached me...and you did...and you don't know how much that means to me."

_  
(You've been so kind and _

_generous_

_I don't know how_

_you keep on giving_

_  
For your kindness I'm in debt to you  
For your selflessness, my admiration_

_  
For everything you've done,_

_you know I'm bound,_

_I'm bound to thank you for it..._. ) (Natalie Merchant)

"Anytime, Jase." She straightened her back and raised her chin and put on her best look of quiet determination. "So...did you get Emily to let Sam come visit you too? Has she been here already? Or...should I just stop pushing...I'm pushing, right? I am! You just woke up from brain surgery. What's wrong with me? You don't need my constant drilling you about what you plan to do. You plan to do what you plan to do and..." She fought hard not to cry "that's all there is to it." She squeezed his hand. "You look so good...my boy on the side...I knew you wouldn't leave me alone on this earth...it wouldn't be much of a story to end that way, huh?"

"Its not over."

"We'll never be over."

It had been so easy to spill his guts out last week and now...it was so much harder. He could remember all the reasons he was afraid to be with her again...afraid for him and her...he could remember her loving Sonny, her marrying Alcazar...he could remember Sam and Lila and his promises...but he could also remember being at Jake's last week. And that memory overrode everything else.

"Carly...I was nothing but a mess when you found me at Jake's. I hated myself and I hated my life...I didn't want the surgery...nothing mattered anymore...you changed all that for me. You saved my life this time...you caught me when I was falling."

"Jase..." she said, as a tear slipped from her eye.

"Thanks, Carly. Thank you..." he choked out. "Thank you for loving me enough to risk everything for me."

_  
(Oh, I want to thank you_

_for so many gifts you gave with love and tenderness,_

_  
I wanna thank you_

_  
I want to thank you_

_for your generosity, _

_the love and the honesty that you gave me_

_  
I want to thank you, _

_show my gratitude, _

_my love and my respect for you_

_I wanna thank you_

Oh I want to thank you, thank you, thank you,  
thank you, thank you, thank you...)

Carly said "I'm just glad you made it. That's all that matters."

"I want more...more than to just survive this...I want to learn from it."

"Learn?"

"Learn to not take you for granted."

"You don't."

"I'm going to get released soon and I'm putting some things right. I'm gonna be the best friend you deserve."

"I love you just the way you are, Jase."

"Yeah...I know that...but that don't make what I've done right."

"Is this about...your job? Are you leaving the business?"

"No...there's no easy way out and I see that now."

She nodded.

Jason said "But I won't live a life of compromises anymore...not unless you tell me that's the way it has to be."

Her eyes searched his. "What are you saying?"

He took in and out a breath. "I'm not going back to Sam. Are you going back to Alcazar?"

She shook her head no, as her eyes filled with hope.

Jason raised his hands and hesitantly cupped her face. He whispered "My life is with you. Will you have me back?"

She nodded, as her lips quivered, and she leaned forward to rest her forehead against his. "Oh God...I can't believe you're doing this, Jase...I can't believe it."

"That's my fault. I made you not believe in my love for you." He kissed her softly on the lips. "We'll just take it slow, Carly. Find our way one day at a time...we got the whole rest of our lives to work this out."

"I thought you loved her. I thought you would pick her."

"I'm not saying I didn't love Sam. I can't go back to her when I think about last week...you'd be in the room every second...even worse than before. I could never love her right when I'm in love with you. Be with me...take me back...I know I don't deserve you...but I need this, Carly. As a favor."

She smiled and looked into his eyes. "I'm gonna win that bet. You're gonna give me my twenty bucks back and twenty of yours too cause...I'm gonna make your life something you love again." Then she kissed him and started proving her words right.

And in Jason there was no fear that this would not work out this time...there was only the knowledge that if he lost everything else in the world, he could never lose Carly. She showed him that, just by being who she always was to him, and when he didn't have the pain and heartbreak of losing her to Sonny weighing him down anymore, when all his memories were wiped clean, Jason had been able to finally see the truth that lay before his eyes for years.

It was her. It had always been her.

**THE END**

**Thanks for reading!**

Next up is a story about Lucky and Emily that is three parts called Never Say Goodbye.

Then I will post a Jarly story, the one mentioned in the index of this series, called On a Night Like This.

It is starts with the blackout in 2006. It is 27 chapters of sex, love, fighting, and family scenes.


	29. Never Say Goodbye, Luckily

Note- _In this AU world, Emily never fell in love with Nikolas. She married and divorced Zander. Liz is divorcing Ric when this story takes place. Nikolas is married to Gia. Lucky is single after going through some bad break ups. Rated mature. Three parts._

**Never Say Goodbye**

**Part One**

**November 2003**

The moment Lucky Spencer walked into his room above Kelly's and saw her sitting there on the edge of his bed, his heart sank. That was not the typical reaction he had to seeing his best friend. Emily usually put a bigger smile on his face than anyone else in the world.

But, just by her posture, he could tell something was wrong with her. She had been going through hell since she divorced Zander. Over and over, she came to Lucky with tears in her eyes and he pulled her into his arms and did his best to make her feel whole again. He hated to see her cry or feel lost, and took each tear as his own personal failure to her.

"Em."

Her head jerked up and she forced a smile onto her lips. She stood up and said "Hi...I broke in. Sorry."

Touching her arm, he said "You know you're welcome here anytime." He looked at the door. "You didn't pick the lock, did you?"

"You tried to teach me but it never really stuck. I charmed a key out of Mike. I didn't feel like waiting downstairs...being around people."

He closed the door and locked it. "What's going on?"

She sighed and looked away, as a single tear slid out of her eye.

"Talk to me, Em. Is it Zander?"

She whispered "Its you."

He froze. How could he have put her in such a wrecked state? He never would do anything to hurt her. He'd kill anyone who even thought about hurting her. Zander had gotten his ass kicked for leaving her and Lucky really didn't care one bit about Zander's claims to him of: _You don't know all the facts_.

The only fact Lucky gave a damn about was that Zander had caused Emily to be in pain.

Before Lucky could question her further, Emily went on "I don't know how to tell you good-bye, Lucky."

His heart clutched, as his breathing became uneven. "Where...where are you going?"

"Back to Stanford. That was always plan and...I just really need a change right now. I can't stand to see Zander everyday...knowing I ruined our marriage. We didn't even last six months and I'm the whole reason for that."

"You can't put it all on yourself. He walked out on you."

"I drove him away."

"I've told you a thousand times that there is no way you could have done that. It doesn't matter if you were needy or if you asked him to accept a lot...like your close relationship to Jason when he hates the guy...or that you sometimes had to keep secrets from him about the Quatermaines or that you wanted to go on vacation with just you, Liz and Gia that time. That's all small stuff and it shouldn't make any good man leave a good woman like you."

"There's more. There's something I never told you...and I've debated with myself if I should now. But its so hard to hide anything from you for long. All those secrets I kept from Zander...I never kept them from you, you know."

"I do know that. So...just tell me." He took her hand and they both sat on the bed. "What have you been holding back? What's the horrible thing you think you did that forced Zander to walk out?"

"I...oh, Lucky." She flung her arms around him, holding him tight for a long minute.

He smoothed his hand over her hair. God, for so long she had been the one woman who believed in him. He wanted Liz to believe...but her faith was weak. He wanted Summer and Lydia to mean as much as Emily to him...but that was a joke...they never could. Only Emily filled up the empty places in Lucky's heart and soul. He couldn't stand the idea of her leaving Port Charles, and him, behind. He needed her way too much.

"Just say it, Em. Nothing you say will make me give up on you...I'm not him...I'm not running away from you...not ever. I'm your best friend, remember."

She whispered, into his ear, "I fell in love with another man," and then she ducked her head back and looked in his eyes.

"Who is it?"

"Its..." her words faltered again and she bit her lip.

"Em, seriously, its okay. I won't judge you."

"Its you."

With the words out, she bounded off the bed and moved over to the window. "Please...don't say anything back...especially just to make me feel better. I didn't even plan to tell you...not really...but its better this way cause now I can go to California and by the time I come back we'll be past the weird awkward, oh my God, I don't know what to say to you now, phase and we'll be back to normal again." She flashed him a shaky smile. "Promise me that we will still be okay when I come back? I have to know I have my best friend to come home to."

His mind was racing. _Its you, its you, its you, its you _ran through his head over and over. It was a fantasy come true. He had always been the one with the great, big,_ too much for one heart to deal with,_ feelings for her...the ones he had to stuff down and he had to deal with completely alone...and now she had just said she felt something back for him. Something a lot deeper than friendship. Lucky wasn't about to let her gloss over that fact and then run off to the other side of the country.

He almost made it to her when she suddenly turned to fully face him and whispered "I just can't lose you forever...please tell me I just didn't mess everything up."

"You can't lose me...ever." He placed his hands on her arms. "You're shaking, Em."

"I'm being such an idiot. But I can't help it. Forgive me?"

"Always. But there's nothing to forgive this time."

"Sure there is. I made Zander hate you..blame you... I even made him swear to never tell you the truth. He kept his word but I couldn't keep any of my vows to him...and then I did what was best for me..but not you...by unburdening my soul just now. I should have kept my mouth shut and left you here with Liz to be happy...I should have done what you would do for me...I shouldn't have been selfish."

"How did Liz get into this conversation?"

"She's divorcing Ric...its just a matter of time till you two get back together...and that's okay. I want you to be with whoever makes you happy. And I'll be fine...don't worry...I really liked Stanford and it will be good to be back there."

"You hated Stanford." Or maybe he just hated all those days she was gone.

"No...not really."

He gave her an unconvinced look. "You belong here."

"I can't stay here. I can't...I'm sorry."

"So that's it? You...you fell in love with me...and you fell out of love with me...and you're leaving me...and I don't get a vote or say in any of it?"

Her voice broke when she asked "What is it you want to say?"

"How about...I'm amazed that my best friend is in love with me...if you still are, Em?"

"Lucky...don't make this harder on me. Just say good-bye to me so I can walk out of here before I break down."

"I can't do that."

"You have to! I need you to tell me good-bye."

"I won't."

"Fine. Have it your way," she eased past him and headed for the door.

He gently grabbed her arm and halted her steps. Whispering he said "Come here," he pulled her into his arms. She buried her face against his shirt. "Em, don't go to Stanford. Stay here...stay here and stay in love with me...let me love you back...give us this chance, please...I'm begging you as your best friend...and the man who has loved you since you were eleven years old...do not walk out that door and leave me behind again."

She wrapped her arms around him, in a desperate embrace, and refused to look at him or answer.

He rubbed her back, trying to calm her down and hoping his own rapidly beating heart would slow enough for him to figure out just the words she wanted to hear. He wouldn't be able to stand it if they got so close to their chance to be together and lost it still.

"Em...I never thought you would want to be with me...I never knew you could see me that way...and now that I do...I can't tell you that its fine for you to move away. I can't do that. So, please, stop asking the impossible from me...and stay."

She looked up and into his eyes. "I can't. Because I know it, even if you don't, that you and Liz will find your way back to each other. And if I actually got you...and then you left me for her...it would kill me...I might even hate you...and I won't risk hating you, Lucky. That's why it was so selfish and wrong for me to tell you how I feel. I fought this for so long...but by the end of my marriage...I would look at Zander and just ache for you...I wanted you to be the one holding me every night...but I can't let you...when I know how deeply you still love her. Please, don't lie to me and say you don't. I know you too well to believe it."

"I don't love her anymore...not as anything but our friend... and Liz really has no place in this room right now. You're using her as an excuse to hide from what you feel for me."

Emily pushed out of his arms. "I'm trying to do what's right for you."

"You offer me everything I ever wanted...you...and then you yank it away and tell me it was just a really nice dream but I can't have it...and you can't stay even in the same state as me anymore. That's not what is right for me. If you want to do what is right for me, Em, then come back over here...let me hold you...let me love you...take the risk...find out if what you feel for me is real or not."

Pure fire shot into her eyes and she breathed out "If?" Emily stepped close to him and raised her hand to caress his cheek. "Did you really just say if?"

Then her lips were on his and their first grown up adult kiss was not sweet or tender or slow, it was an explosion of desire that ended with him lifting her off her feet. He walked them toward the closest wall and pressed her back to it, as their tongues tangled together inside of her mouth.

When he finally broke the kiss and let her breath, Emily said, in a ragged tone, "I'm supposed to...be...saying...good-bye to you."

"I'm never gonna let you say good-bye to me again."


	30. luckily, part 2

**Never Say Goodbye**

**Part Two**

**November 2003**

He had her pinned against the wall with her feet off the ground.

Lucky slowly brought his mouth towards her, as he watched her eyes to see if this is what she really wanted. Her breath mingled with his. Her body rubbed against his. Never had they been pressed together so erotically before.

He inched closer to her mouth but Emily was the one who closed the gap between them and started to give him short, sensual kisses. She slid down the wall, so that her feet were on the ground again. Her hands came up and cupped his face, as they kept kissing.

He was shocked to feel moisture on his cheeks and realized she was crying. Emily whispered "Oh, God, I'll miss you so much, Lucky." Then she started to kiss him again, winding her arms around his neck.

His head was swimming with thoughts and feelings about the woman in his arms. Her knew her when she was just a girl, when she used to love to skateboard and chase her dog around the neighborhood, and he knew her as a reckless teenager and he knew her as a young woman who fought to beat cancer and fought to overcome heartbreak.

Through it all, she burrowed deeper and deeper into his heart, into his soul, into his bones, till he could feel her even when she was miles away...till nothing felt right in his world unless she was in the same room as him. But she never belonged just to him. Other men got to love her, marry her, promise her children and years of happiness...while Lucky tried his damn hardest to love someone...anyone...more than he did Emily. But it never worked.

He didn't know the day he fell for her. He just always wanted more...one more kiss by the campfire...one more dance under the stars...one more hug where she holds on long past when any other woman would have let go of him...one more chance for her to pick him. When she said _Its you_, he felt like that chance became real and Lucky would do anything to keep her by his side now.

Lucky moved his mouth back an inch. "Don't leave...you can't leave me."

"Just kiss me. Please. I need this."

"Tell me you're staying."

"Lucky..." She leaned her head back on the wall and let out a shuddering breath, as she looked away from him again.

He ran on hand into her hair and forced her eyes back on him. "You're so scared that you're shaking. I never wanted to scare you. I wanted you to know...I'm the one man...the one person on this whole earth...who you can never lose. Not to Liz. Not to anyone." He leaned his forehead against hers and confessed "Its always been you. How can you not believe me? Its you."

XXXXXXXXX

_Its you_. Those two words filled Emily's heart with hope.

Suddenly her tears were not ones of fear or pain or loss, they were of joy. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, feeling way too much all at one time to be able to think straight.

"Shhh," Lucky said, as he dropped kisses on her forehead, her cheeks, and the corner of her mouth. "You got to believe me, Em. I could tell you about a thousand days when I wished you were my girl and not his...when there was no other woman I woke up thinking about or went to sleep thinking about...but you...and, though I'm ashamed to say it, some of those days were ones I spent with Liz. I did fall for her...but like I fell for you? No way. Because all I felt for her ended a while ago...but even if you leave me today...what I feel for you will not end. So can you see now? Its you...I fell in love with you...so long ago that its just who I am now...I'm the man in love with Emily Bowen Quatermaine...I just never thought you might love me back. I really never thought I had a shot. But I'm asking for one...give me a shot, Em, please. Give us a shot."

Slowly, with her eyes still closed, she nodded.

How could she not? The love she felt for him was slow growing but it was the deepest love she had ever known. It had taken root in her. Sunk itself down so deep that she didn't know who she might be if she ever tried to stop loving him. But she never would.

She had only wanted to move away for his sake. To let him get back with Liz without her interfering...and for her own sake...so she didn't have to watch it...but never because she thought she could fall out of love with him if she put distance between them. She wouldn't want to stop loving him. It was the most painful, beautiful, heart wrenchingly perfect emotion she had ever felt in her life.

Her eyes fluttered open to find him smiling at her. Lucky whispered "Did you just say yes?"

"I'll take a shot with you."

It was his turn to cry. He looked away from her as his eyes filled with tears. He choked out "Good."

Emily smiled shyly and wound her arms around his waist, resting her head on his shoulder. "I should have told you the truth a long time ago. I haven't been happy with Zander for months now and it was never what he was doing...it was always that he wasn't you. I just thought I would have to be second in your heart...and I can't. Cause you are first in mine."

"Your first in mine, too, and it killed me to see you married to someone who's not me...he's not your best friend...he's not the guy who knows your secrets...he doesn't know every punch line to every joke you tell...he could never know you like I do...not just cause we grew up together but because you let me know you best. You don't have to be scared anymore...I'll always take care of you." He moved out of her arms. Lucky slid his hand in hers and said "Come on...lets get out here and go get some dinner."

Emily met his eyes and shook her head, very slightly.

"Em..."his tone was a warning and a question, and a love filled promise all in one.

"I don't want to rush you but...I need to know you're mine. _Really _mine." She whispered "Make love to me, Lucky."

XXXXXXXXXXX

His body hardened as she asked for him to make love to her. Though a part of him thought it was too soon, he couldn't resist the temptation. She was too beautiful, too much of his dream come true, and just too precious to him for him to turn her down when she had laid her heart on the line that way. He only prayed she wouldn't regret this ever, because he never would.

The proper gentlemen in him believed there should be more time between a couple's first kiss and when they slept together, more than ten crazy minutes of confessions, but the first kiss he ever shared with Emily was when they were only kids. If he counted that then they had waited longer than most people ever did. Still he would have waited longer for her. He would have waited his lifetime for her, if only to hear her say she was in love with him a moment before he died...and it still would have all been worth it.

He moved close to her again. Taking hold of her face, he bent down and kissed her tenderly. Then he swept her right off her feet, causing Emily to let out a yelp of happy surprise. Two large steps and he was at the bed and set her down. He pulled off her shoes and socks, and kicked off his own shoes and yanked off his socks, before crawling onto the bed. With his hands on either side of her, Lucky hovered over Emily. Her hands immediately went to the buttons of his shirt. She undid several and kissed his chest.

He rolled onto his back and pulled her close to him, kissing her slowly. She kept working on the buttons of his shirt. Emily broke their kiss and started to kiss his jaw, his throat, and then his chest again. She licked at his nipple and he sucked in a deep breath. Then her hands moved to his zipper.

"Em...we have all night, okay?"

She moved back up the bed and looked in his eyes, hers searched his, looking for his heart and his love for her.

Lucky leaned close to her and whispered in her ear "Do you think I don't want to be inside of you right now? I do. But I want everything else first." He nibbled on her ear and laid hot, open mouth kisses over her neck. "I want to kiss you..." his mouth moved to hers "till you forget every other man who ever kissed you. I want to know you are mine," he used the same words as she had "Really mine."

Then he started to kiss her again, nice and slow, gentle and sweet, pulling her body slightly on top of his. His hands roamed over her back and then gently massaged her ass. He couldn't help smiling as he did that, and suddenly she was smiling against his lips back.

Emily sucked his bottom lip and then broke their kiss. Her smile was wide with joy. "This is real?"

"This is real."

"Thank God."


	31. luckily, last part

**Note- Lucky never married Liz. Cameron was never born. This is before any of that in Gh canon history.**

**Never Say Goodbye**

**Part Three**

**November 2003**

He had loved her for years, so quietly that no one guessed. Not even her.

Lucky loved Emily in his own head and his own heart and his soul, away from the world's prying eyes. But he never really thought he could become her man. Emily always seemed to be with someone else, and look at Lucky as just her best friend. He could have settled for that because being her best friend was the most important role in his life. It didn't even feel like it was settling. He felt grateful for that place in her world. But if she wanted to give him more, he would gladly take it. He would take just as much as she offered and let his love for her out into the light of day.

Lucky wanted to make love to Emily slowly and show her just how much she meant to him. They would only have one first time. He wanted it to be a memory that she could hold in her heart forever.

Their kisses slowly grew more intense, but each time they did he would shift their positions and give them a moment to recover and then start kissing her again. It was delicious torture to see just how long he could resist letting his hands explore her body more throughly. He never would have been able to take it so slow if he wasn't sure they would have more nights together...times when they could be wild and reckless and insane together. They would have that later. Right now he wanted to give her something as beautiful as the all the love she had given him through the years by being his best friend.

Lucky laid a trail of soft kisses along her neck and then nuzzled it. "You're beautiful, Emily. No one is more beautiful than you are."

"You're so biased but I love it."

"Good. Love it. Cause you're gonna be hearing it all the time."

He moved his head back and looked into her eyes. They sparkled with love and lust and hope. All for him. Lucky throbbed with desire for her. Only her. He could barely believe she really thought someone else meant more to him. Not now. Not ever again. Emily meant everything to this man.

He sat up and slowly pulled her upright too. Then he started kissing her again, as one of his hands slowly worked up her sweater and then closed around her breast, cupping it for the first time ever. She let out a very soft moan, urging him along, and he started to caress her, rolling the nipple between his fingers. Emily squirmed and arched into him. She tore her mouth off his and said "So good...its so much better because its you."

That sent him over the edge. Just kisses were not going to be enough anymore.

Reaching down, he took hold of the bottom of her shirt. With his eyes locked on hers, he looked at her for permission, and she nodded. Lucky helped her out of it. His eyes feasted on the site of her lace clad breasts, the curve of her waist, the way her eyes looked now- so vulnerable but trusting.

He kissed her stomach first and then started to kiss up her body, stopping right beneath her breasts.

Lucky wet his lips. "I will always be good to you." He kissed the swell of her right breast. "I will always take care of you, Em." He kissed her other breast. "I will always be the man you can count on." He reached around and undid her bra, then slid it off her, taking her breasts into his hands. "As much as this changes everything..." he caressed both her breasts "it also changes nothing..." he bent to lay a kisses over her breasts "this is just my love for you, Emily, and you have always had that...always."

She lay back down and he kept softly kissing her breasts.

When his tongue first licked over her nipple, it sent an erotic shock straight to his groin. Every single touch and kiss felt more intense because it was between him and her...she was right when she said it was better because it was them together.

He swirled his tongue over her nipple and then sucked it into his mouth. She started to moan softly.

Every moan made him feel powerful...he was the one making her feel this good...finally she was letting him be everything to him. He spent long minutes suckling each of her breasts, throughly loving the taste and feel of her in his mouth, until finally Emily took his hand and shoved it against the outside of her jeans. He rubbed his hand against the center of her. Smiling he moved away from her breasts, and as he kept rubbing her, he moved up to her lips again.

He told her "I always did want to make out with you in high school."

"If you make love to me right now...we can make out in the backseat of your car next week...I promise...just please...Lucky...I'm so wet...I'm so ready for you."

Those words sent his hands in motion. He undid her pants and she slid out of them while he stood up and undressed. He watched her as she slipped out of her underwear, biting her bottom lip as she revealed herself fully to him. Her eyes grew even darker with need for him, until the intensity was so much that she glanced away, as he slid a condom out of his wallet.

He opened it and Emily's eyes darted back to him. She whispered "Wait...let me. Let me touch you."

Moving to the edge of the bed, Emily sat up. She visibly swallowed right before taking the hard, thick length of him into her hands. She moaned just at the feel of him.

"Em...damn...this is like a fantasy."

She stroked her hand over him, smiling slightly as she did. She ran her tongue around the tip of him. "So much...better..than my fantasies."

Emily slid the condom on him and then scooted back on the bed. Lucky moved close to her, letting his fingers go straight to her hot, wet heat and touching her there for the first time. He gentle moved his fingers over her.

"Yes, yes, Lucky...just like that."

XXXXXXXX

His feather soft touches sent shivers through her whole body.

She didn't want him to be rough, she just wanted him to go faster, for as good as it all felt and as much as she wanted it to last and last, Emily was desperate to be able to come with Lucky as quickly as she could...because she hadn't during her whole marriage to Zander.

She used to when they were just out of high school and first having sex but that all changed after they were wed at her hospital bedside. She thought they could get it all back. They couldn't. She missed Lucky most when she was at Stanford and craved his hand in hers most when she was sick. Marrying Zander was a mistake and only hurt them both. She was left sad, frustrated and guilty. Only tonight with Lucky could she let all that go.

Finally Emily could be with the man she had really wanted since the moment she came home from California. The man she had fallen in love with little by little over the years until she was in so deep she couldn't even think of letting another man touch her, of coming for another man, or withering beneath his touch...only Lucky should touch her, only Lucky was her man now.

His fingers circled over her clit, as his mouth sucked on her throat, and his other hand massaged her breast, till all of her body was humming and she was moving closer and closer to her release. "Don't stop...please, Lucky...ohhhh...yes. Yes!"

He kept working her clit but also slid a finger inside of her, pumping quickly in and out of her. Her whole body bucked against his palm. She soaked his fingers as her muscles clenched around him and spasm after spasm racked her body.

_God,_ she thought as soon as she was able to think again, _its so much better with him...I should have been with him years ago. _

XXXXXXXXX

Lucky slid himself back up her body and captured her lips in a kiss. He smoothed back her hair. "You're beautiful, sweetie."

"Call me that again."

Smiling he said "Sweetie."

She reached for him and stroked him. "I love the way that sounds...and I love the way you feel...and I love this...I've wanted you for so long."

As he entered her, he whispered in her ear "I love you...only you, Emily. Trust in that."

He stilled and let her adjust to the feel of him inside of her. After a moment, he started to stroke in and out of her, shallow at first and then deeper. His breathing was erratic and his heart beat rapidly...this was a moment he imagined so many times but it felt more amazing then he could have dreamed up.

Emily kissed his shoulder and neck. "So good...ohhh...Lucky."

Every stroke was slow, as he took his time making love to her. His eyes locked in on hers and created the most intimate moment of either of their lives. After long minutes, he sped up his pace. Softly he repeated her name "Em, Em, Em..." He massaged her breast, pinching the nipple gently and then harder and harder as her moans grew louder. They shared one last kiss and seconds later his body jerked to a climax and he screamed "Emily!"

Only minutes later, when he was holding her in his arms and they were breathing heavily, did he wonder if the people down in the diner heard him. He smirked, just thinking about it and really didn't care. He needed to move into his own apartment for sure, and soon, but until then he would make love to Emily in this room no matter what anyone else could hear...he wanted her way too much to give a damn.

She looked up and smiled at him. "I'm so glad I'm not on a plane for California right now."

"You were leaving tonight?"

"I couldn't tell you sooner. I didn't know if I could tell you at all."

His eyes searched hers. "I hate it that you wanted to leave town. Don't you know how many people need you here? Starting with me."

(_You're beautiful beyond words  
You're beautiful to me  
You can make me cry_

_  
Never say goodbye_.) ( Bob Dylan)

She said, "I thought I was doing the right thing for us...because I needed your friendship even more than your love."

"You have both." He captured her lips in another kiss. When he pulled back he settled her closer to his body and pulled a blanket over them. He loved the way she slung her leg over his and kept them all intertwined as she rested her head on his chest.

Emily let out a happy sigh. "I can't imagine leaving you now."

"Good."

_(Time is all I have to give  
You can have it if you choose  
With me you can live_

_  
Never say goodbye_.)

She looked up at him and her eyes met his. He couldn't get over how brightly they shined. Had they ever shined this bright for anyone else? He prayed not. Lucky knew that Emily had loved before, and so had he, but never had he felt what he did with her tonight.

He brushed his hand through her hair and tucked some behind her ear. "I want you to know, Em, this night..."

She smiled. "I know."

"It means everything to me."

"Me too."

"We're gonna have more than just this room, okay? We're gonna have dates and we're gonna make memories and we're gonna...just have it all. You're my best friend and there is no one else I want to share my life with."

(_My dreams are made of iron and steel  
with a big bouquetof roses hanging down  
from the heavens to the ground._

_The crashing waves roll over me  
as I stand upon the sand  
wait for you to come  
and grab hold of my hand._

_Oh, baby, baby, baby blue  
you'll change your last name, too)_

Emily said, softly, "I'm sorry I lost my faith in you. I'm sorry I didn't realize you would pick me over her."

"Over anyone. But don't blame yourself, okay? Just the next time you think...that's it..and you're looking at the door...remember that wherever you go in this world...there will be this man waiting for you to come back...I'll be waiting on you...because no one can take your place for me."

Shivering in his arms, Emily made a vow that Lucky had been waiting years to hear "I'll never say good-bye to you again."

**THE END**


	32. Slave For You, Claudia and Logan

Logan Hayes and Claudia Zacchara

Mature

**Slave For You**

**Spring of 2008**

The savage and intense way his lips fuse to her starts her bones shaking with an animalistic raw hunger.

He could snap at any moment. Instead of making her want to run away, that makes her wet and

ready for whatever he brings on.

Her nails dig into his shoulder as she hangs on for all she's worth. She doesn't want to tame him. She would never be here with him if he was more sane than crazy, more calm than erratic, more like them- the rest of the messed up world- and less like her.

He might kill her if she pisses him off. Or at least try. And that makes her heart beat so fast that she can't even think about anything but getting his zipper undone and getting it undone now.

But she can't do that. She doesn't get to decide what happens right now. That's all on him.

Its familiar to feel nervous, off balance....like her life is on the line. That is how she has lived for as far back as she can remember and now that is all she knows. That's what comfortable. He taps into that better than any man she's met since she moved back home.

It feels right to be just a little terrified as he lifts her right off her feet, pushing her skirt up and her underwear aside, his mouth joined to hers in a brutal assault, and takes her without any foreplay at all with her back is pressed up against a concrete pillar in her Daddy's garage.

All day long- every glance across the room when his cold, nearly dead steel eyes meet hers- the game they play without saying a word, that's their foreplay. Him looking at her like she is lunch....that's all it takes to make her body warm up, remembering the last time he was inside of her and wasn't playing nice.

Remember how loud she screamed and how he covered her mouth with his hand.

He's rough with her but she likes it that way. Every second they are not alone, she's in charge. But when its just the two of them, he's the one who calls all the shots. She says where they meet, when they meet, and she demands he doesn't call her doll, sweetheart, sexy thang or any of his other Texas bullshit endearments that she's heard him toss around so carelessly to other females but once its just him and her, eye to eye, breathing shallowly and not talking....then Logan dominates Claudia, every thrust, every kiss, every position, everything he wants to do to her he does without her every trying to control a thing.

He grabs her wrists and pins them above her head, making the black dress she has on stretch taut across her body, then his tongue slips out and wets his lips, as he makes her wait for it.

The seconds tick by like years in Claudia's mind as she feels her body tensing around him, until finally his tongue swipes over the hard pebble her nipple has become. Right through the fabric of her dress he lavishes attention on it until she is panting in frustration because she wants to feel his mouth on her bare skin. But he will do what he wants to do....and that is the best part for her...knowing she can't yank out a gun and make him obey, like she does on the streets, and she refuses to use the little helpless girl tactics that she pulls out to make mob rivals and her father think she's weak.

With Logan, she is dominated but she feels stronger than at any other moment during the day.

Because she picked him out of every man she could have had....and she picked right. There is no doubt that he gets her. He gets why it has to be fast and dangerous and feel like swallowing down death when she comes....he gets why its not roses and champagne and fancy hotel suites. He gets the rage burning through her mind, tearing up her soul.

And he digs it.

She wants to scream because it feels so good, his body stroking hers, but she instead whispers out her pleasure....loving the fact that if she does break and scream they will get caught, and wouldn't everyone in the mansion be shocked to learn what goes on out in the garage when no one is looking. And not just the garage....the backseat of the limo, the basement, the laundry room, anywhere there is not a camera or a gaurd. It has to be close to the house because it would take too long to drive across town to a motel.

Claudia barely even knows what she is saying: his name, curse words, yes, jibberish, she isn't sure.

Hell she might have even let a _please_ slip out.

When it comes to sexual partners, she's had good before and she's had great but she's never had anyone like Logan. It's a rare brand of crazy they share...but they do..together they are combustible.

Kerosene, a torch, and a wood pile. It makes her pant to think she's drifting this close to the fire.

She will get burned eventually. The only question is when.

He grabs a fist full of her hair, hisses in her ear, "Come for me," and that's all it takes to send her spiraling over the edge, her legs wrapped tight around his back as his breathing changes and his face contorts. "Fuck yeah, just like that."

A wicked sin tainted grin creases over Claudia's lips as Logan eases his hold on her hair and his body relaxes. She clings to him for a moment, the first tender one between them that night. This part never lasts long.....the mutual comfort allowed in the afterglow...a minute or two and then its back to their separate corners, their vastly different worlds.

She doesn't waste time wishing for that to be different- for him to be different. It is what it is. She's realistic about why they can't be a couple.

Maybe he could have been her man, if he hadn't screwed up every chance he ever got to make something of himself. If he was more than a chair-pusher murse for her Daddy. But he had. He was. He couldn't run shit with her...and Claudia wasn't about to compromise her plans or change her standards for nobody's ass.

She was gonna run Port Charles, one way or another, whether the likes of Corinthos, Morgan,

her father and his lawyer believed it or not. It might take time-and she might have to be a whore, liar, killer and thief first- but she would run that city...and Logan wouldn't be running it with her.

But that wasn't what she wanted to think about as he moved away from her body that night causing

her five inch high heels hit the floor again. She didn't want to think about when they weren't able to be all the other needed anymore.

Because, for now, they were. And, for now, Logan Hayes gave her just what she wanted most. Mind shattering orgasms in private, and "Yes, ma'am," in public.

The best of both worlds.

He was staring at her, with his ever probing, slightly menacing glare- the one that bordered on criminal, the one she liked the most- when she patted his face and whispered "Thanks, doll," with a smirk.

He looked like he didn't want to smile back at her, at least his eyes never lightened, but the corner of one side of his lips turned up, as if he couldn't fight off the grin. "Get back to work."

_Yes, sir,_ she thought as she watched him walk out of the garage. When he saw her later it would be back to business as usual, until the next time she sent him a text: _Pool house. Five minutes._

Then he would be the boss, and she wouldn't his "Ms. Zacchara." She would be his slave, and love every sweaty, body clenching, glorious moment of it.

THE END


	33. Hush, Jomax tragedy

**Hush**

"This is my fault," she whispers against his ear, as they huddle in the farthest corner of a pitch black room that is....ever so slowly but surely...filling with smoke.

"Hush," he murmurs back.

They can't spend their last few moments on earth arguing about if its his curse or hers that has trapped them in this burning building.

Her words are tear filled. Her body shudders against his. "I tried to warn you. Why the hell didn't you listen to me?"

Its true. She had warned him. Maxie told him before they ever even kissed that every person who loved her paid the price, one way or the other, for that mistake.

But he had refused to listen.

Because he's Johnny Zacchara- and no matter what games he plays at - he will always think he knows it all, that he can be as reckless as he wants and never die. That life should be easy- go his way.

And yet he has known from the day his father sunk a bullet in his mother that his life was never gonna be what it should be.

That dichotomy- wanting it all and knowing that it would all be ruined in the end- has tortured every waking moment of his life since he was eight years old. Made him lash out. Made him run wild. Made him fight back. Made him more that half crazy. Made him not believe her words.

He could have fought his attraction to her longer....kept lying to himself forever...but that would have been the smart and cautious thing to do. And Johnny's just not made that way.

He's made to jump from roof top to roof top in the middle of the rain, half hoping he doesn't make it but always, always, always knowing deep down that he will. Because he was not meant to die by his own reckless ways. It would be some mob shit that took him out. Like tonight.

Trapped in a warehouse that is half collapsed, out of bullets and with no one left alive to fight anyway, steel beams locking them in this room, as the building burns around them. His father's legacy finally catching up with him the way he always knew it would.

That's why he took what Maxie offered him. Because she was right. He was bound to die young. But not by loving her. That was the one thing he got right in this whole fucked up thing called his life.

Finally jerking her close that cool Spring day and kissing her until she couldn't even form coherent sentences anymore. Being the selfish, foolish, destructive man that he could no longer deny he was deep down underneath all the niceties and fairytales he had tried to weave before then.

He was never made for fairytales or happy endings.

His eyes tear, and he tells himself it is because of the smoke, and because of her....because he can't save her. But not because his life will soon end. That don't matter. He was more than half dead every day but the ones he spent in bed with her anyway.

Maxie's breathing is shallow. They have tried to find a way out, only to be driven back by the flames. Soon they will lose consciousness. The blackness they have been slowly sinking into all their lives will consume them. The grave that has been calling will finally take them in.

She asks again "Why couldn't you listen? Why didn't you run from me? Why? Why?" She starts coughing. "Why, Johnny? Damn you!"

His lips find hers in the dark, and speak against her mouth, "You know why," and then he's kissing her, pushing up that little dress of hers, pushing aside her thong, letting his hands splay on the soft warm flesh of her thigh.

She's his. She's all his. And nothing else matters. He can't think about who he is leaving behind or if he could have escaped this fate. There is no time for regrets. There is only time for her.

And he will take her. Again. Because he's just that crazy.

She's shaking and crying and clutching at his black t-shirt. The fire is crackling as it consumes the door. Her hand fumbles through the dark and finds his zipper, yanking it down with frantic urgency...it always has to be fast but this time it has to be now, or never.

Her hands stroke him. And in every touch there is more than just desperation. There is a tender sort of love that shouldn't ever be given to a man like him. But she did and she does and he takes it. He takes from her. Because he's not strong enough to do anything else.

His lungs start to fill with smoke. He can barely think straight now but he still wants this...her...still wants her one last time. Now. Now. Now.

Then her legs come up, wrapping around his waist as they move together, crying and shaking and gasping for breath but there is none to be found. Its all ending...its nearly over...they were both right when they said this will end in death, you better know what you're getting into....and he had.

And it was so worth it.

As they cling together, not willing to let go even after their mutual release, she whispers "I'm sorry for getting you killed."

"Hush. Just hush."

THE END


	34. Two Sides, Lucky and Rebecca

**Mature. Someone requested a sexy Lubecca fic and this kinda different style of one shots is what The Muse came up with this time.**

Take One

Voices in His Head  
Lucky and Rebecca  
April 2009

"I can't be his Emily." She looks dead in his eyes....showing her anger, her frustration, her fears. _She's shows her whole heart to you._

"You don't have to be."

Rebecca Shaw...._Rebecca, Rebecca, Rebecca, a pretty but plain name, swallow it down like a pill and don't ask too many questions_. She leans against the refrigerator at the Spencer house. There is no mention of the fact that Emily did that countless times in her life.

Lucky brought Rebecca there after they spotted Nikolas and Liz kissing at Jake's. They drink beers together and talk about everything and nothing for a while until the conversation circles to where it was going from the start.

Where they have been going from the start. _When was the start? Don't think about that right now._

With her gravelly voice that she forces to sound hard she asks him "Why can you see me?"

"Because I wasn't married to Emily."

"But you loved her in your own way. She was your best friend....right?"

"You aren't Emily."_ Its simple to believe. _

"No." She sets her beer down on the counter. Her finger loops around his belt buckle as she tugs him close to her. "I'm not Emily." _Anymore?_

He doesn't see Emily when he looks at her. Maybe he just can't let his mind go there. There are times in a man's life when he knows better than to think too hard about something....he moves on pure instinct.

He believes his own lies.

_She doesn't remind me of anyone._

He believes his own justifications.

_She doesn't belong to anyone but herself._

He believes anything and everything his brain can think up that will allow him to go for what he wants most. That will get him across that line.

_She's not Emily. She's someone completely different. I never let Helena steal Emily from us._

And he goes where he wants to go. To Hell with the consequences. Some distant tomorrow is sure to bring joy and pain when the truth is found...._Is she? Isn't she?....._but for tonight he just sinks blissfully into his delusions and denials. Lucky Spencer will be ashamed of himself for this one day.

But he's not feeling that particular gut clenching emotion right now. Because he can't allow his mind to wonder about the truth. Not now. Not when she's so close. And she's looking at him like he's the hero in her story. Like he's the only one on earth that can make her smile now.

She's the deep end of the ocean. She's a brush fire coming to consume him. She's hot and cold and good and bad. Who cares what her name is, really?

She's so close now. Her fingers tugging on his belt...idly...taking her time. And he knows, he knows deep down, he can make her so much happier than Nikolas can.

That is what matters most right now. _Whoever she is, she's yours. All yours._

Her breath is sweet as it falls on his lips. The scent of her intoxicating like the high of pain killers. He's flying and he hasn't even kissed her yet. Her eyes drop down....she's hiding something. But she doesn't have to hide from him. Doesn't she know that? _Emily knows everything about you._

"Lucky," she whispers in this soft, almost terrified voice.

But there's nothing to be afraid of. He has her. He'll take care of her. _You always were the best at taking care of her._

His hands grip her waist, haul her off the ground and sit her on the counter. Then they move to sink into her hair, holding her head still for him. One more look...her eyes on fire with secrets, lies....trust....she's ready to give herself over to him...only him....and then his mouth is on hers.

Lucky chokes on her name in his head: _Rebecca. Rebecca. Rebecca. Swallow it down like a pill._

This is everything he ever wanted. Everything. Everything. _You can have it all with her. Just don't think too hard right now. Don't think._

She moans against his lips. _Don't think, Lucky. Don't screw this all up._

He can have all he wants. _But don't think there's no cost. You'll pay for this one day, Spencer._

**THE END  
Emily's one shot follows the song.**

It's too late, baby  
There's no turning around.  
I've got my hands in my pocket and my head in a clouds

This is how I do  
when I think about you.

I never thought that you could break me apart  
I keep a sinister smile and a hold on my heart  
You want to get inside?  
Then you can get in line.  
But not this time.

Cause you caught me off guard.  
Now I'm running and screaming.  
I feel like a hero and you are my heroine!

I won't try to philosophize.  
I'll just take a deep breath and I'll look in your eyes.  
This is how I feel-and its so surreal.

I got a closet filled up to the brim  
with the ghosts of my past  
and the skeletons.

And I don't know why  
you'd even try  
but I won't lie  
you caught me off guard.

Now I'm running and screaming.  
I feel like a hero and you are my heroine!  
Do you know that your love is the sweetest sin?

And I feel a weakness coming on.  
Never felt so good to be so wrong.  
Had my heart on lockdown.  
And then you turned me around.

I feel like a newborn child  
every time I get a chance to see you smile.

It's not complicated.  
I was so jaded  
and you caught me off guard.

Now I'm running and screaming.

I feel like a hero and you are my heroine!

Do you know that your love is the sweetest sin?  
Do you know that your love is the sweetest sin?  
Do you know that your love is the sweetest sin? (Boys Like Girls)

____________________________________________________________________  
**  
Take Two**

Voices in Her Head  
Lucky and Rebecca  
April 2009

His kiss is breath stealing perfection. He probably thinks he's her second choice or this is somehow about his brother. Its not. Rebecca wants Lucky for the way he looks at her. Like she's someone worth ruining himself over...and at the same time...someone who can save him. _You know you'll only bring him down_.

She can't let him see who she really is. Because who she is isn't who she wants to be. Not at all. She wants to be the woman reflected in his eyes. _Just enjoy this cause it won't last. Stop thinking so damn much._

His hands are tangled in her hair. Holding her still as his mouth devours her. The beer on his tongue reminds her he is not thinking straight, and that's probably for the best. She's fought this and craved this...ran from him, ran to him....thought about running away before he found out the truth about her...she's wanted him since the moment she saw him outside The Metro Court Hotel. _The connection was palpable. Don't you even wonder why?_

And now he is hers.

There was a moment earlier, when she was leaning against the fridge, with the cool glass of her bottle of beer pressed to her lips, when his eyes met hers and she knew he wasn't going to turn back. He knew where they were going. He wanted her. He would take her-without apology.

That moment...that single blink in time...was the best moment of her life thus far. _What you can remember of your life, don't you mean?_

That moment she knew he had to have her. Just like she had to have him. To Hell with right, wrong, plans, promises.....to Hell with anything but finding a way to get him out of his clothes. To feel his bare skin rubbing hers raw. That's what she's living for now.

Him. Not her job. Not her schemes. Not her boss. Not her messy past, uncertain future or the confusion in her head. _Ignore the questions and black spaces. Be a puppet on a string. That's who you are at your core now, right_?

She wraps her jean clad legs around his back, pressing her center against him, trapping him against her. Making sure he knows kisses will not be enough for her. She wants it all tonight. _This is how it should have been from the start_.

His chest- hard, strong, muscular- presses against her breasts causing several reactions in this girl he calls Rebecca. _It doesn't matter what he calls you, does it_?

Her nipples harden. Her body gets even wetter for him. And also....she sighs softly against his lips because that chest of his is symbol of all Lucky is to her...all she hopes, against all hope, he will always be....he makes her feel safe. _You need this. There's no shame in that._

She isn't sure where to put her hands. She wants to touch every part of him. She runs her fingers over his back, up under his shirt, pressing him ever closer to her. He can never get close enough for her.

He yanks her off the counter just as quick as he set her there. With her legs wound tight around him, their mouths still fused together in this endless stream of kisses and bites and moans, he carries her to the living room. Presses her down onto the couch, laying himself on top of her. The hard length of him is proof he wants just what she wants. She smiles against his mouth.

Lucky breaks their kiss. In a low, gruff voice he demands. "Tell me to stop now.....or don't tell me at all."

For her answer she takes his hand and moves it down between her legs. Their eyes stay on each other as he rubs against her jeans. _Would you agree to burn in Hell later just to have him right now?_

He stares at her like she's his next breath. She's never been this to anyone else before. Not this. Not air. _He's not just anyone, is he? This isn't casual_.

Lucky tugs Rebecca's zipper down. He pulls off her shoes, tossing them to the ground with a thump, and then she lifts her hips and the jeans follow. His eyes settle on the damp white panties that still cover her. He licks his lips.

Off comes his shirt.

She sits up quickly. Her mouth is on his in an instant. Nothing feels right in her life anymore but him. _He'll always feel perfect. At least you know one thing now_.

Rebecca's fingers make swift work of yanking off Lucky's belt and undoing the button on his jeans, sliding down the zipper. She wants to feel him in her hands.

He groans deep in the back of his throat as he breaks their kiss. "You first," he grunts.

She almost argues with him. He doesn't get it. She could come just from touching him at this point. Every part of her is throbbing over him already. She like a live wire. She wants to control this moment. Wants to own him like he already owns her. Rebecca wants to watch her hand wrapped around him. Know she has that power over him. That would get her off right there. Or get her close. Get her dripping wet and ready for him to take her that last inch.

_  
You don't even understand you. How is he supposed to? But you know him. You know him. Let him give you what he needs to. Surrender_.

Rebecca pulls off her top.

His mouth moves to her throat. Laying opened mouth kisses on her skin with a slow reverence that wasn't there a moment before. Her eyes drift close. Her body shudders against him. His fingers are slipped up under the edge of her underwear, gently at first he moves over her swollen flesh, while his mouth never leaves her neck. His paces quickens. Her breaths get more and more shallow. His finger pushes inside of her and she lets out a gasp. _Its good, isn't it? You knew it would be this good. Worth the sin._

She runs her hands through his hair, tugging on it. Her head falls back when she arches against him. His mouth moves down to the swell of her breasts. Then his tongue licks at the hard nub of her nipple, through the silk of her bra.

"Oh," she sucks in a breath. "God," it hisses back out between her teeth.

_Lucky, Lucky, Lucky, this is Lucky making love to you tonight. His hands. His mouth. He'll be inside of you soon. This is your Lucky. Enjoy this. Nothing lasts forever....not even death, right?_

A second finger slides inside her. But she wants more. She wants him. "Lucky....come on...please....please."

He slows the pace of his thrusting fingers. Breathing out over her skin, "You're beautiful like this."

She looks down and he's looking up at her. Then his mouth is on hers again. One of her legs locks around his back, pressing herself against his hand as she furiously moves, desperate to get there and also desperate not to. She's aching to feel him sunken inside of her.

Her nails claw at his back. He rips his mouth off hers as she tightens around his fingers. His mouth goes to her ear. "Yes....yes....just like that."

_You feel like a fool for calling anything you had before this love, don't you? Don't worry. He'll forgive you. Doesn't Lucky forgive everything?_

The room is filled with the sounds of her moans as she climaxes, his thumb rubbing her clit and making her scream out the same curse words five times in a row. When his fingers finally slide free of her he starts kissing her again...slowly...like they have all night. But she still doesn't want slow. Rebecca pushes Lucky on his back. Now its her turn.

_If he only knew how long you've wanted to do this. Better not to be too honest right now....honesty is not your strong suit anymore anyways. Do you even know what the truth is? Or just what you've been told? Just the lies you spew? Maybe if you looked deeper you'd find something better for yourself.....more like this...less like that sick, empty feeling you've been carrying around for months now._

Soon she has her hands and mouth on him. She takes it torturously slow. Though she wants it fast, she wants, more than anything, this to be amazing for Lucky. She wants to be amazing for him. What no other woman can be for him. She longs to leave her mark on him in his memories. _You'll always be in his head. Always_.

He lets out these soft grunts. With him throbbing in her mouth she looks up at him then lets him slide free of her lips. Standing up, on shaking legs, Rebecca strips off her panties and bra, as Lucky sits up, then she settles herself on his lap.

The wetness of her slicks over him. She smiles as she places her hands on his shoulders. "I'll never regret you, Lucky."

"Good."

She whispers, her breath warm on his skin, into his ear "You'll always be my best memory," and the she sinks herself down onto him. _Your best memories are all of him. Just remember. Remember.....Rebecca?_

**THE END**


	35. Instant Addiction

Note- Is anyone interested in this couple? If so I'll post this story here (its already posted elsewhere). If they don't have any fans then I won't bother. Let me know because its just a matter of transferring the fic over here from there.

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon  
September 2010

Instant Addiction

_She'll show up_, he told himself.

It stunned him how badly he craved her. Made him feel unlike himself. Or like a self he thought was long dead and buried in his past.

Jason paced the floors of the hotel suite like a caged animal, yanking off his tie and then his suit jacket, tossing them on the nearby chair, kicking off his shoes, ripping his shirt out of his pants so it hung loose around his waist instead of being tucked in.

In his head, there was only her now.

Only that kiss they had shared five minutes before. Hidden in the shadows on the balcony outside the Grille, his mouth devouring hers. Making him remember what pure lust felt like again.

Like swallowing down white hot coals and begging for more. Begging to be burned alive under her lips, her touch, dying to the sounds of her moans and purrs filling his ears.

He never would have guessed it would be her that gave that back to him. He had noticed she was smoking from the word go but that didn't matter way back then. How she looked in jeans and black leather knee high boots didn't matter either.

She was always off limits in some way: his boss' lawyer, lover and the mother of Sonny's kid. She always belonged to Sonny- not him. In all the years they knew each other, before tonight, Jason hadn't given taking Alexis to bed a second thought.

Tonight, though, she would be Jason's woman. If she ever showed up. He glanced down at his watch.

_Damn it, _he thought, _Where are you?_

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Well, wasn't this just like her life. Tipsy at her daughter's big fancy wedding to a doctor (a doctor! Thank you, Jesus.) Tipsy and feeling up her daughter's ex-fiancee on the balcony while people danced just inside the doors not twenty feet away.

Alexis Davis wondered if she was finally losing her mind, falling into madness as all Cassadines eventually do at some point. What else in the world could explain this?

Diane sat next to her at the bar, as Alexis downed a shot of tequila. "Another! I'm the mother of the bride and I'm going to be a grandmother before I qualify for AARP so just, here," she reached out and her hands closed around the bottle the bartender held "leave it."

Diane raised an eyebrow. "I know you are not about to say no to that man. Is that even heard of? Has any woman ever said no when asked to lick, suck and otherwise debauch the naked body of Jason "Stone Hard" Morgan?"

"SHHHHH!" Alexis then whispered "Its Stone Cold and shut up about that."

Diane took the bottle. "I can't let you do this. Pass this up. Let him sit in that room...all ready....its a sin, I tell you."

"You go to his room then. Here's the pass key. Enjoy."

Diane picked it up. Alexis grabbed it back and added "You're unbelievable!"

"I just know that these kind of opportunities come around but once in a lifetime. He would not have to say more than _Do you want _and I would be stripping off this dress like it was on fire."

Alexis glared at her. "I don't do that. Random sex with...well not a stranger...it would be better if he was a stranger. That I could work with much better."

"Close your eyes, he can be anybody you want."

"I would know it was Jason and that's the point. Its Jason! Jason! OH MY GOD. How could this happen to me?"

Suddenly, from behind them, they heard Carly asked "What's Jason? And what happened to you?"

Alexis spun around. State's evidence number one in the case of Why Alexis Can't Screw Jason. His best friend and famous harpy, known far and wide for ruining Alexis' best chance at love and then stealing her best friend away...kinda...Carly Jacks. "Shouldn't you be home taking care of my god daughter right about now?"

"Shouldn't you tell me what happened to Jason before I start screaming holy hell up in here? JAX! Get over here and make her talk!"

Diane snarked "She didn't even give you a chance to answer. That wasn't a very fair threat at all."

Alexis said to Carly. "Be quiet! Oh, look, people are staring. Great. I don't see why you didn't RSVP your regrets like I suggested."

"What happened to Jason?" She said to the bartender. "Get me a phone. I have to make a call. JAX! Come on already! You can talk to Ned anytime! Something is going on with Jason and Alexis!"

Alexis jumped up and put her hand over Carly's mouth. "I'll take this down when you promise to use your inside voice."

Jax came walking over. "My favorite women in the world, what seems to be the problem?"

Carly pushed Alexis hand down. "She know something about-"

Alexis said "Jason fired Diane and hired me, that's all. I'm conflicted about it. Loyalty versus money versus morals...its a lot to think about. A bad position to be in, that's all." She drug out the last two words.

Jax frowned. "Your first client in private practice is going to be a mobster? Maybe you should reconsider that."

Carly narrowed her eyes at Alexis. "Hmmm. Is that all? Why the secrecy? Is something else going on? I should go call Jason, get to the bottom of this."

"No!" Alexis yelped. "He's busy right now. He had to leave because he got a call about work. You know...shooting people and stuff like that....or plucking coffee beans....something...you'd know better than me what he really does for a living. I just go into court and tell the world that Sonny and Jason are honorable law abiding misunderstood family men. Now if you will excuse me, I really must go. I have an awful headache. Since Sam and Matt are gone already....I really don't need to stay any longer, do I? Night!"

Jax kissed her cheek. Alexis shot Diane a look that said: Not a word! Then she hurried towards the elevator. Once she was inside and alone she leaned against the wall, then placed a hand over her fast beating heart.

No wonder Carly was still insane over Jason all these years later. One kiss from him and Alexis felt scorched. What would she be like after a whole night of him laying those kind of kisses all over her body....of that muscular body of his, that she always pretended not to notice, rubbing against her in every delicious way imaginable.

She would be his sex slave, that's what! No, no, no, no way.

She was not going up to that room. Just thinking about the kiss now was already making her heat up again. The alcohol making her head foggy. Remembered caresses making her skin burn as if he was touching her at this very moment.

Alexis hit the stop button in the elevator, as her breathing became unsteady. Lord above, what was she about to get herself into?  
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Earlier that evening......_

He didn't have even one drink at the wedding. He didn't want to get out of control. Let his emotions loose.

Instead Jason tried to keep himself under tight control. But the church service had been a freaking nightmare to get through. Everywhere he looked were reminders of all the happiness he lost: there was Carly holding Maggie Jay, her baby with somebody that was not Jason. Her daughter, finally. Then there was Liz with Jason's son on her lap, as her hand held Patrick's. It was one thing for Jason to give her back to Lucky, and his son to Lucky, but to watch her find love with someone else....that made Liz another person for him to be happy for since she got what she wanted, even if Jason got nothing. And Sam...glowing in her wedding gown....living the right life. He could see that. There was also Spencer, a child he very rarely saw, who reminded him of a baby that was never born.

Everywhere he turned he saw the lives he gave up.

By the time he hit the balcony, and noticed Alexis standing deep in the shadows- leaning against the wall with her eyes closed- Jason wanted some way to forget who he was.

Not that he ever got what he wanted. Cause he usually didn't let himself take it.

Concerned for Alexis, he walked closer. "You okay?"

She startled and her eyes popped open. In the moonlight she looked damn good in this green, plunging neckline gown she had on.

"Oh, its just you."

"Did you want to be alone?"

"No. I was just...you know...adjusting. I'm the mother-in-law...probably soon to be grandmother as Matt is talking surrogates already. So...its...well you can imagine...an adjustment." She whispered "I'm old now."

He tried to not roll his eyes. She was still hot as hell. She had a daughter in first grade. She could work a pair of Levi's like nobody's business. She even looked good when she had her glasses haphazardly propped on her head while she rambled.

Jason noticed all that but he never took it personal before. Tonight, feeling like his life was a mess, he hated seeing her down on her life too. "You're not old."

"I'm ancient!"

"I'm ancient too then. I know Maxie thinks so. She bought me...don't tell anyone this...some kind of cream for wrinkles."

Alexis laughed so much she nearly fell over, and clutched at Jason's arm. The feel of her hand on him changed the temperature for Jason. She lightly brushed against him and he stiffened....seeing her not as the women he knew for years...but just as a sexy chick he wanted to push against the wall, then kiss till she only knew one word: Jason.

She looked up at him, still chuckling, caught the look in his eye and the laugh died abruptly on her lips. She stared at him, searching his eyes, while he moved closer to her.

Without a word being spoken they came together in a completely x-rated kiss. His tongue slide erotically against her lips till she opened for him and then evaded her mouth like he wanted to possess every inch of her. The kiss only ended when he started to slip down the strap of her dress and she suddenly seemed to realize they were close to having sex in public. He realized nothing but that she was delicious and he wanted to keep going.

Alexis pushed at Jason's chest gently. Both were breathing heavily.

She swallowed hard. "We don't....like each other...like that, do we?"

He pulled out his wallet and took out the pass key. "The Presidential Suite. Follow me in ten minutes."

"You booked it for the night already? I don't understand...."

"Carly lets me use whatever room I want. I just need to make sure that one is empty. If its not, I'll call you. Here...take this."

She took the key, staring at it in a daze.

Jason leaned forward, like he would kiss her again, but just ground out "Make it five minutes," and then left. Alexis mouth dropped open as she watched him walk away. He looked back right before he stepped inside.

Damn. She shouldn't have worn that dress. It was that dress that did him in. Not that he was complaining.


	36. jason and alexis, part two

**Note- Glad to hear a couple of people want to read this. Let me know when you've finished this chapter and I'll post the next.**

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon  
September 2010

**Instant Addiction  
Part Two  
Mature content**

He was pretty sure if she didn't show up soon he would have to take matters into his own hands...and that would really be a let down considering Jason wanted his hands on her, not himself.

He yanked out his cell phone to call Alexis and see what the hell the hold up was. He told her five minutes. It had been more like twenty.

Jason was pacing the room, overheated. wanting a drink after not having one at Sam's wedding. But he ignored the mini fridge cause he wanted his mind completely clear for when Alexis came through that door.

Before he dialed he told himself the same tired, old, worn out line he always did: People have the right to make their own choices.

And Alexis did. The last thing he would do is force her. That was completely out of the realm of what he was capable of doing but he could call her and ask what was up. Not try to talk her into anything. Just ask. That wasn't going over the line.

Who the hell was he kidding? Whether it was right or wrong to push this issue, he was calling. Jason found her name in his contacts and dialed.

She sounded breathless when she said "Good, this will save me a trip, though I was already stepping off the elevator."

Hearing that he headed for the door of the suite.

Alexis went on "You have to tell Carly that you are trying to hire me as your attorney. Don't ask why. Its a long story. Just do that, okay? Remember. You fired Diane and you want to hire me. Okay, well, have a nice evening then."

He yanked open the door and looked into the hall. She was standing at the elevator. "Hey."

Her head turned. Her eyes widened. She spoke nervously when she said "I was just going."

"Yeah?"

Alexis walked toward him, very slowly, still holding her phone, as Jason shoved his in his pocket, of his already feeling way too tight pants. She looked slightly dazed. "I only wanted to give you that message. Our alibi for your very nosy and, can I mention, extremely loud best friend."

"You changed your mind?"

"I wouldn't put it that way. I never agreed to anything." She rifled in her purse and pulled out the key. "Here. This belongs to you."

His eyes bore into her. Was she serious? She could walk away from that kiss? He felt like pushing her against the wall in this hallway, getting up under that green dress she wore, and telling Spinelli later to destroy the security tapes.

Jason let out a short breath as he took the pass key. "You seeing someone?"

"Me? No. Not anymore. I mean there was this little flirtation with Cruz but, as you know, he's not really my type. Sure he's very attractive. Not in the way you are but...uh...he's good looking. Unfortunately, he doesn't quite suit my tastes."

No more talking. That's what he felt like telling her. How did Cruz freaking Rodriguez get into this conversation?

Alexis added "He's too law abiding."

Jason nodded, while looking at her cleavage. He forced his eyes up to meet hers. But she had great eyes too...and a great mouth. Those lips tasted so damn good...fuck, he was horny.

"Uh-uh."

"Its not you. Its me! I have to go now."

She was halfway down the hall when he ground out her name in this sexually frustrated tone. "Alexis......"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Oh God. Good God. The way he looked at her. The way he said her name. He was practically dripping sweat on her, breathing hard....looking hard....oh hell.

She spun around and then she rushed back down the hall. Her hands grabbed his face and she kissed him with all this pent-up heat that had accumulated in her over the last long year that she spent sleeping alone.

Cruz didn't do a thing for her. Nice ass but way too normal. She liked this...extraordinary. Give her this any day of the week.

A man that was dangerous and complicated.

Jason lifted Alexis up, straight off her feet so that they dangled beneath her, turned them around and walked inside the room, kicking the door closed.

All the while his mouth was doing indecent things to hers.

Being a sex slave could be a nice change of pace for me, she thought.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Cruz wanted her? Fuck him. He wasn't gonna lay a hand on Alexis anytime soon. Jason didn't like to share. That was his one rule.

It was a iron clad one.

And this woman, for right now, was all his. His to kiss senseless. His to strip her dress off of...his to wrap his arm around her waist from behind, as she moaned and offered her neck to him to suck, her breasts to massage, her lace clad ass to rub until she was squirming beneath his fingers.

His. He liked this. Her.

This was just what the freaking doctor ordered.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Oh. What am I doing? Alexis thought, even as she moaned loudly when his fingers twisted her nipple while his mouth sucked mercilessly at her neck. She faced away from him, leaning back to rest on that rock hard, wall of muscle, chest of his.

What am I doing here with JASON MORGAN? My daughter's ex....and Sonny's friend...and Carly will freak...and....damn, she thought before deciding ...He can kiss me for a couple years and then I'll tell him this was all a crazy idea.

She spun around. She wore only her lacy, already more than a little damp, underwear now. Alexis wrapped her arms around his neck. Their eyes met. Her tone was throaty when she warned him "You should be more careful who you kiss on balconies at weddings."

"I make sure I know who I'm kissing, Alexis....I knew."

Then he kissed her again. His mouth always doing things to her that she had forgotten mouths could even do.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason's blood was boiling thick in his veins by the time Alexis started to unbutton his shirt and then slid it off his shoulders, her hand slipping up under his t-shirt to caress his abs, while her mouth moved to kiss his shoulders.

Each touch made him throb a little worse over her. He couldn't believe anyone could still get him like this. It had been so long since he felt like he wanted a chick, damn the consequences.

Yet that is how he wanted Alexis.

He stepped back and yanked his t-shirt off , tossing it away from him, and then wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close to him again. Her bare breasts mashed against his chest creating friction that sent a fresh wave of sparks down his spine. She made this soft yelp sound as her pelvis slammed against his.

I've got to get inside of her, Jason thought, Not in five minutes. Now.

But he wanted to make this good for her. That had to come first. Her eyes were wide and lust laden, shocked, dark, dragging him under her spell. They never looked like this before for him.

How in the hell other men had ever managed to walk away from her, he had no clue.

Jason's hand slid up her back, then into her hair, and he started to pull out pins to take it down. "Is this okay?"

"Mmm-hmmm."

She murmured that in way that suggested he could do whatever he wanted to her. That made him twitch with anticipation. There was a long list of what he wanted to do. He wanted to keep being with her till it didn't feel this good anymore. This room could be their playground till real life invaded again.

Her hair spilled onto his hands, as the pins fell to the floor. Jason gently massaged her head for a moment, eliciting a soft sigh from her. Her eyes drifted close. Alexis muttered "Sinful."

"Worth it." Jason dipped his head and nibbled on her neck. The smell of her invaded his senses every time he feasted on this long, smooth throat of hers...and he kept going back to it over and over, making love to this part of her first before he planned to move on to every other part of her.

It would be a long night...weekend...month. How long could he get off from work? What were the Zaccharas up to this week? He couldn't remember right now.

They better cool the fuck out. I don't got time for their shit, he thought.

All Jason had time for was discovering every single way to make Alexis scream in delight.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

She ended up straddling him as he sat on a chair. Not very romantic but hot damn did it feel good. Alexis was losing control of all her willpower and all the mental blocks that made her stop herself before she did anything too reckless.

Because this was reckless. Oh so dirty and reckless but she was loving every sweat slicked minute of it, as she rode him, and his strong, thick fingers held onto his hips.

Jason Morgan....the man she knew for over a decade. The man that was off limits to her. The man that was making her body shiver from head to toe, that was blowing on her wet, flushed skin, that was grunting and telling her how good she felt, that was making her feel alive, like a woman again....not ancient.

She never knew he was anything like this....that she could crave him this much. She had never even guessed.

Her held fell back. A series of prayers went up to God, then she was screaming incoherently as Jason sucked on her shoulder and thrust into her one final time.

Note- The Zaccharas are John and Rudy.


	37. jason and alexis, part three

Mallory: this story is written for Ayshen, and is posted at If Only in My Fantasies. The site is all about unconventional couples so this story is littered with off-the-wall pairings. There will be several more love scene chapters, interspersed with a great big story about the way life is different in Port Charles next year. Starting with Matt and Sam being married, Sonny's new marriage, what happened to John and Claudia's lives etc. But mainly this is about Jason and Alexis and the hot sexual connection they discover between themselves.

Thanks for reading!

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon  
September 2010**

**Instant Addiction  
Part Three  
Mature language**

Alexis sweat slicked body was still joined with Jason's, as they both recovered from the fast and furious way they came together, when her cell phone went off.

Breathing hard, with her head laying on his shoulder, as her hand had been idly running over his abs...she was mesmerized by his body.....she said "That's Viola's ring tone. I have to call her back right away."

Jason lets out a ragged breath between his teeth. "Okay."

XXXXXXX

Less than five minutes later she grabbed her clothes to head for the bathroom. Molly had a fever and sore throat. The strep she just got over could have returned. She was crying for her mother.

She explained to Jason but he only nodded in response. He looked about ready to fall onto the bed and sleep for a few days.

Alexis slid into the bathroom, feeling the cold hotel air conditioning on her overheated skin, and the cool tile floor beneath her bare feet. She looked in the mirror and saw a woman who had been thoroughly fucked.

God. How long had it been since she looked- and felt- this way? Way too long. Who knew it would be Jason that did this for her...to her...with her. She now saw Jason, silent and immoral but moral in his own way, Morgan in a whole new light.

When she later came out of the bathroom he had his pants on again, but nothing else. "Do you need a ride?"

"You, looking like that, on your motorcycle would get headlines...the type that I couldn't explain to my girls."

"I'd get dressed and I drove my SUV."

"I drove too. I'm fine."

"You were drinking. You sure?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

"Well....good bye then...I mean...good night then....or good bye....whatever...though of course we will see each other again. But, most likely, not like this again. So good night and good bye, Jason. That's a great little pass key you got there. Its my new favorite thing about Carly...my only favorite thing...except for Maggie Jay, of course, and the boys....but I think their fathers have a lot to do with who they are, not just her...well...I need to go now."

Jason pulled her close to him. She went silent.

"First," he ground out before kissing her deeply, just as indecently all the other times he kissed her earlier. "Second..."

She was gasping for breath.

He went on "I will call you."

Alexis nodded, numbly, stumbled backwards and hit the wall, turned and rushed from the room, without her purse or shoes. Jason chuckled. Grabbing her stuff he walked into the hall, where she was turning around to come back. He handed it to her.

She said "Thank you," in a breathless way that caused his eyes to flare with heat.

Alexis fled for the elevator before poor Molly didn't see her mother tonight at all...because her mother would be riding Jason Morgan till dawn if she stuck around there.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was simple for him. He liked having sex with her. He felt they should do it again and often.

They were both adults. They enjoyed each other's bodies. He was past the point where he could spare any more emotion on guilt. If other people had a problem with them then those people just had a problem. They would deal.

It wasn't about to stop Jason from calling Alexis tomorrow.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

For her it was very complicated. This man had been in love with her daughter. This man had listened to Sonny talk about whatever his feelings used to be for Alexis. Then there was the Carly factor to consider. There was something very daytime talk show about Alexis and Jason now becoming lovers.

But it had felt good. She would hate to have to tell him that their one time was the only , it wasn't like she was the type of woman who engaged in no-emotion sexual flings.

When he called she would just explain it had been a one time thing.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He didn't call. Work got in the way the next day. When he went to Greystone, he walked in on Alexis talking about Winston Academy.

Her back was to Jason but Sonny spotted him and said "Hey," causing her to spin around and yelp when she saw who it was.

Jason nodded at Sonny but said to Alexis "Hi. You okay?"

She didn't look okay. She looked like she was going to swallow her tongue. He really liked that tongue now...and the body it was attached to...and he could use a lawyer. She was better than Diane, and Diane had unexpectedly quit on him anyway. Plus if Jason did not hire Alexis, like their cover story said he had, then he would have to tell Carly something he wasn't ready to yet. So Jason did not want Alexis to choke to death in front of him on her tongue.

Not that he would have two days ago either. But two days ago he hadn't spend hours thinking about her tongue licking him.

Sonny moved around Alexis, to look at her, and raised an eyebrow, just as she regained the ability to speak. "I'm fine! Kristina is going to Washington DC for a week on a class trip and we were talking guards. What do you think...Milo or Max? I think Milo. He's such a sweet young man, right?"

Jason looked at Sonny. "Whatever you two decide."

"Milo is fine, Alexis. Can I get you some water?"

XXXXXXXXXX

She would like to tell Sonny _Yes, pour it over my head, please, so I can stop picturing your friend naked._

But that would cause all sorts of drama that she just didn't need in her life.

_Is it hot in here_? she asked _herself Doesn't Sonny realize we are experiencing an Indian Summer? Really? A little air conditioning, please. Can the adults who are having hot sexual fantasies get a little A.C. in here? Is that too much to ask_?

Sonny poured the water. Alexis drank the water. Jason said to her "I was planning to call you."

Alexis choked on the water. Sonny got her a napkin. Alexis shot Jason a dirty look.

He added "Diane resigned as my lawyer this morning so-"

Sonny asked "Why's that? You two get into it?"

"She said she had her hands full with you and her other clients."

Sonny frowned. "We pay her enough to not have other clients. I'll talk to her."

Jason said "Its fine. I was thinking I'd just hire Alexis instead. That okay with you, Alexis?"

"I'm not sure I really have the time. Molly just started playing in the indoor winter soccer league at the community center. That's really going to be a time investment for me with the practices and games and trips to the doctors for sprained this or bruised that. I could really be tied up for the next few months."

Sonny said "Come on now. You can fit Jason in, right? He needs the best and you've always been the best."

Jason nodded. "The best."

His tone was just a little too deep, deeper then it had been two days back when he talked to her.

Alexis grabbed her briefcase and sputtered "Okay, okay. I'll...fit him in....but I have to rush now. I have soccer cleats to buy." She kissed Sonny's cheek and then scooted past Jason, hurried through the foyer saying "Good night, Marco."

"Its Niko, ma'am. Remember?"

"Sure! Good night, Milo!" and then she was outside, sucking in nice healthy air and feeling like strangling Jason Morgan to death for being so damn sexy and making her so turned on.

That leather jacket never looked so good before. Why did it spark a million fantasies today? Like her wearing just that jacket on the back of his motorcycle as they sat parked in some field in the middle of nowhere late at night, with a light rain falling down, and his mouth sucking at her nipples while they got all wet together.

_AHHH!_ Alexis thought as she got in the car._ I need to stay away from that man. And he wants me to be his lawyer! Thank you very much, nosy ass Carly, for making me say that lie._

Long hours going over his latest case. Him reaching over and taking her glasses off her head, sitting them down, pushing the files off the table, and pushing up her skirt as he bent her over....

_AHHH_! Alexis backed out of the driver_. What has Jason done to me? I used to be rational! Wanting to screw Jason is not rational_!

XXXXXXXXXX

Sonny asked Jason "What was that about?"

Jason stared at him for a moment then said "Our shipment almost got caught today in the Fed's investigation."

"What? How did that happen? Who screwed up?"

"I think Raynor got someone to turn."

"A snitch in the ranks?"

And then Sonny was so busy thinking about that he didn't have time to wonder about Alexis' strange behavior. But later he would. And later someone was going to tell him when this flirtation between his friend- or more like a brother to Sonny's way of thinking- Jason and his former love and the mother of his daughter and niece, Alexis, had started.

Because he was not blind. He could see something was going on between them.

He just hoped Alexis didn't get hurt in all of this. Sonny might be in love himself with someone else but he wouldn't stand by and watch Alexis get played with. He would have to go scope out Carly's marriage- and soon- make sure that she was happy with the Australian jackass so that Sonny knew Jason wasn't going to be having Carly on his doorstep...looking to come back home... anytime soon.

Alexis better not become nobody's collateral damage.

**Note-  
**the reveal of Sonny Corinthos' wife in the next chapter.


	38. jason and alexis, part four

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon  
September 2010**

Instant Addiction  
Part Four

After running into Jason for the first time since they had wild, fast, no hold bars sex after Sam's wedding, Alexis went straight home and opened a bottle of wine.

Ric had the girls.

Since Ric started dating Nadine he had become all about family. Alexis loved Nadine. Sometimes Alexis thought she should marry Nadine herself- but the whole living on a farm thing, not to mention, the Aunt Raylene stories plus the lack of the necessary right equipment on Nadine's body made Alexis forgo pursuing that idea.

But there was no denying the fact that Nadine had been good to Nikolas and she was great for Ric. Nadine being around Ric made Alexis feel comfortable enough to send both her girls with them for visits. The kids wouldn't be home till bedtime.

Molly's step throat hadn't came back. Her fever broke by morning and she was feeling up to spending time with her Daddy. Alexis told Ric not to tire her out and call if the fever came back.

Alexis guzzled down one glass of wine and poured another, while shaking her head at herself.

Sex with Jason? Really? she berated herself. He's Jason. JASON! This will be so messy. We know all the same people, go to all the same functions, love the same family members....its just too many overlapping, conflicting, confusing ties. We would never work as a couple. COUPLE? Oh my God, I am thinking of being half of a couple with Jason hitman Morgan. Then I'd have to really work hard to keep him off death row. I can't have my boyfriend on death row, can I? My boyfriend....I am not going to date my daughter's ex. I'm not. No matter if he gave me the best orgasm I've had in the last ten years. SO WHAT? I'll buy more batteries and a new model.

Her thoughts went on and on like this until there was a knock on the door. She looked over and into a pair of blue eyes that were known for three things: making men piss their pants when he stared them down with his gun pointed in their faces, making women want to drop their panties when he so much as glanced their way over a cold beer at Jake's, and blank stares.

He was giving her the second look now. She swallowed hard.

Alexis' eyes fluttered close. Being a sex slave could have its advantages, she thought. It's a way to kill a Sunday afternoon at least. No....bad Alexis. No. There will be none of that now.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jason watched as Alexis sat on her couch, holding a glass of wine, and ignoring him as he stood on her deck. He knocked again.

Her eyes jerked open. She sat down the wine, walked over to the door, and opened it. "In need of a lawyer already? What is the charge?"

"Can I come in?"

She motioned for him to come inside. Damn she looked good today too. Unlike last week Jason now noticed how her skirt shaped to her ass when she walked, and how delicate that lace blouse with a couple of buttons undone looked underneath that suit jacket. He wondered why she was so dressed up on a Sunday, though.

If she had on jeans then they could go for a ride on his bike. Her pressed against his back sounded like perfect foreplay to him. Not that he didn't have some other ideas for foreplay that would also work. He couldn't look at her now and not see her naked skin flushed as she threw back her head and moaned his name.

He needed to focus. She wasn't an easy woman to convince of anything. Let alone to have sex with him....today...tonight at the latest. But if she was in the slightest way into him, then he was going to tell her he was feeling the same thing.

Most times Jason didn't like to admit to his feelings. But that wedding...seeing everyone else happy, even Spinelli had Maxie and they lived together...made him want some happiness he could claim as his own.

Jason walked into the lake house, as Alexis closed the door. Before he could say a word she was ranting "The best? Did you have to say the best in that tone? Now Sonny knows! He knows! And if he knows then she will know and then, once that best friend of yours knows anything, its about one second till the whole world knows. You know that's true. So the world knows now. The world is aware we had sex."

"I don't think the world cares."

"Why did you look at me like that in front of him? And say the best like that?"

"Like what?" he asked, annoyed with how this was going.

"You know like what! Don't play innocent now. Like a man who wanted a woman..." she whispered "naked."

"The last thing I wanted was Sonny to know anything or to embarrass you."

"I'm not embarrassed."

"Sonny didn't say anything about us but...yeah...he probably suspects. Will that be a problem for you?"

"Its not what Sonny knows, its her."

"I can handle Carly."

"Well, Lord knows, no one else can." Alexis grabbed her wine and downed it. "We are not going to Greystone together again for a long while. I'll be your lawyer but no social encounters."

Jason stared at her.

Alexis asked "Okay? Agreed? We don't want to complicate things in our lives, right?"

"I don't want to complicate your life in a bad way."

"Good. And I don't want to complicate yours. Wow. That was easy. Well, good night."

He shook his head and headed for the door.

Alexis spun around. "What was that? Are you...mad?"

He turned around to face her. "No."

"You're mad. Why are you mad?"

"I came here to talk to you but you just talked at me and told me to leave. So I'm leaving. I'm not mad. I'm just leaving." Jason walked out the door and headed for his bike.

XXXXXXXXX

So much for that, Jason thought.

He felt like a fool. Alexis was not even remotely interested in him. He thought they made one hell of a hot connection and she thought it was something that they needed to hide from the world and never do again.

He was sure "the world' had less than no interest in who Alexis slept with.

Jason didn't even get why she would care what this nameless global world or Carly or Sonny thought about this. Alexis went to Sonny's wedding, like Jason went to Carly's. So Alexis had to, in some way, support his marriage. Though Jason knew it was not just over because the person moved on...feelings would always linger, family was family and love ran deep...but Jason rarely let what Carly thought stop him from screwing anybody.

He'd never get laid if he lived his life that way.

With his jaw tensed and jumping beneath his skin, he climbed on his bike- pissed off, disappointed and ready to ride to Alaska if that is what it took to forget about the night before. Just then Alexis came running outside. "WAIT!"

She breathlessly grabbed onto his bike handles.

Jason tried not to smirk. Maybe things weren't quite completely over yet. He could at least hear what she had to say.

XXXXXXXXXX

Sonny's wife walked into the living room at Greystone, saw the expression on his face, and asked "Uh-oh," her voice low in the back of her throat "what's got you all worked up?"

He stood by the bar. Throwing up his hands in frustration, while shaking his head, he said "The damn Feds again!" Sonny pointed at her. "And, get this, Jason....is into Alexis."

Her eyes sparkled. With her voice low and tingling with heat she breathed out "Hot."

His voice was light with a warning to not make him laugh, as he poured himself a drink."Come on!"

She laughed. He chuckled and added, with a small smile, "Don't start with me right now."

She always teased him and he always felt better. His temper was nothing for her to worry about because one look in her eyes and he was smiling again, despite himself or how he felt the second before.

She walked over and massaged his shoulders. "You okay?"

He was quiet for a long moment. "I want her happy. Can he really make her happy? You know him...its always Carly first for him, and Jason first for Carly...I lived that..I don't know...I don't know that it'd be any different for her."

Gia Campbell-Corinthos whispered sexily in her husband's ear. "You never can tell what two people might be like together."

Sonny relaxed. She always did make him feel a hell of a lot better with not much work on her part.

Note-  
This couple also has another scene later in this story, along with a look at the marriage of Sam and Matt, and more unconventional couples that are together when this story takes place.


	39. jason and alexis, part five

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon  
September 2010**

Instant Addiction  
Part Five

Alexis debated if she should just let Jason walk out, mad at her- whether he would admit to that or not- or if she should stop him. She almost thought...by the look in his eyes...that she had hurt his feelings.

That had not been her intention at all. Sure she would like to have some crazy, wild, sex everywhere and anywhere, sort of thing with him but she had to be reasonable. She was a mother, a mother-in-law, a devoted aunt, god mother, best friend, ex-wife, baby mama of a mob boss, lawyer with responsibilities and she could not just have hot nasty sex for the fun of it.

Could she?

_Could I?_ she asked herself.

No! She couldn't.

_No! I can't_, she told herself.

She just had to stop thinking that way about Jason. Because she knew her. Great sex led to her wanting more. Hello? Ever heard of Ric Lansing. He wasn't even nearly as good in bed as Jason but he was quite endowed and he was energetic and he was there...wanting to be her rock...and so she married the guy. Not her finest hour.

Though Jerry Jacks was worst. God, she had made some mistakes in her life.

Jason was a totally different type of man though. Alexis suddenly realized that maybe Jason thought she believed he was not good enough for her to even want in her bed...that she felt he was less worthy to be with her than Ric or Jerry. Which was not what she thought at all.

She just thought sleeping with Jason was complicated and she wasn't up for complicated when they weren't going to be a couple...were they?

_Why do I keep thinking this would lead to more than just sex if we let it? There is no proof or evidence to substantiate the theory he wants that, _she berated herself as she ran outside to stop him from leaving, in her bare feet since she had stripped off her shoes and panty house right before she opened her bottle of wine.

"WAIT!"

Alexis ran off the deck, down the driveway, passed the guards who were shocked at this scene, and grabbed the handle bar of Jason's bike. "Come back inside."

"What is it you want to say?"

"Inside."

He nodded and followed her inside. She started to pace. "First, Jason, I'm sorry if you were offended. You know I care greatly about you....that came out wrong...that's what I say to Sonny and you...you are a lot of things..." she looked at his ass and then looked away, as she paced a circle around him "like a hitman and my daughter's ex-lover and Sonny's right hand man and a lot of other good and bad things that I really don't think I need to get into because you know them already as well as I do...because we know each other well...but what you are not is Sonny to me. So I won't talk to you like I talk to him..." she let out a breath. "I like you, Jason."

A small smile curved his lips. "That's better."

"I like you but I don't like flings. Sorry. Thank you for asking, though."

"Did I ask you for a fling?"

"In a roundabout way, yes, you did and you were mad when I said no. Don't try to play it off. I can read people. It's the litigator in me. You were mad when you walked out....weren't you?"

"Yeah."

She smiled slightly. "That's sweet."

"Alexis...can I talk now?"

"I don't see what is left to say, really. I don't do flings anymore and so what happened last night...while being mind blowing...can not happen again. I really believe, if you think more about it, you'd agree."

"I won't try to talk you into something you don't want."

"You'll agree when you really think more about the logistics of this."

"If you aren't interested, I get that. I should go." He walked passed her.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Mind blowing. Those two words stuck in Jason's head. He was let down that Alexis was hell bent on them not pursuing anything but at least she enjoyed what happened as much as he had.

That would have to be enough for him. Because she wasn't offering more.

He'd have to get by without ever burying himself between her thighs again. And he'd have to forget about all the fantasies he wanted to act out with her now. That ride to Alaska was looking better and better. Cause he did need to forget the sex they had.

Or else he'd do something like grab her and kiss her. Lose control of his emotions. He didn't want to feel or act that way ever again...he'd done it before and it scared the hell out of him to be that way.

Jason pulled open the door. The gaurd standing there, Marco, nodded at him.

Alexis asked "And you agree, right?"

He felt like groaning. She wanted to talk about why they couldn't ever sleep together again. Talk. He didn't want to talk. He wanted her naked on her dining room table, with the curtains closed so the men couldn't see them...but then they would still hear...who gave a fuck what they heard?

He wanted her naked no matter who would know about it.

Jason slowly turned around. He closed the door again. "I don't agree to anything you've said since I got here. The only thing that made any sense is I'm not Sonny."

"And I like you. Don't forget that part. I do like you immensely."

Immensely. He was moving up now. Mind blowing and immensely. He couldn't remember savoring words so much since the days when Brenda was his wife....sometimes a word or two made a real difference to a man.

"Good."

Alexis' eyes were wide and confused. She nibbled on her bottom lip for a moment. She took off her glasses and waved them around. Jason simply stared at her, wondering when she went from gorgeous to also cute. She was getting to him now and he knew it.

He was taking her way too personal after one night of sex.

But this was Alexis. Alexis. The woman he knew for over a decade. A friend. Someone he trusted. Someone he confided in. He could get pissed at her or argue with her but he knew she had his back-and that was just what she was not supposed to do with the job she had.

But she did it anyway.

There was a time Jason felt like shit in her eyes- when he dated Sam. He thought they got past that though. That she knew he gave up Sam that summer to protect her, and even if he screwed it all up later. He had really loved her daughter and done right by her for a while there before they went to hell. Jason thought Alexis respected him again now.

Maybe it wasn't about what she thought of him though. It was just that she wasn't in the right place to start something new. He could understand that.

Waving her glasses around Alexis said "But you don't agree with me? Why? How do you figure a fling would be beneficial to either of us? I mean yes it would be a stress reliever but lets not lie...fantastic sex leads to emotions getting tangled up in it every time...that's just what fantastic sex does-" she stopped abruptly, looked at the glass doors, and whispered "Do you think Marco can hear us?"

She put her glasses down, grabbed Jason's hand and drug him to the hallway. "There, that's better. Okay. So you see I'm right, don't t you?"

He was still holding her hand. Her soft, warm, gentle hand that had closed around the hard length of him the night before. He really liked this hand. He pulled her closer to him and she yelped. "I don't even know what you're talking about."

"What? Are you not listening? Please focus. Its important. And hard to say so its not fair to make me repeat myself." Alexis let out a short breath as their eyes held on each other.

Jason wanted to just lean over and kiss her. There was a wall not a foot away. They could get this worked out the sweatiest way possible. But he had restraint and he stepped back, letting go of her hand. He rubbed his head. "You don't want to fall for me."

"Did I say that? I don't think I said that- exactly."

"What did you say then?"

"That I would fall for you if...that...last night...that amazing time...happened over and over."

Amazing. Over and over. Jason was finally starting to like where this was going. Now if he could just get how her mind was working. Saying each word slowly he asked "And that's a problem because?"

Her eyes widened to huge brown orbs. She spoke super fast when she cried "It would be very complicated!"

She looked like she just might pass out. Jason touched her arm. "You okay? Alexis? Hey. Lets sit down."

He tried to lead her to the living room but she grabbed his hand and drug him to a bedroom. He looked around and saw lots of dolls, a tea set, and tons of purple everything: bed spread, clothes, curtains. This was Molly's room.

Alexis leaned against the door, breathing erratically. "Last night was nice. Agreed?"

"Yeah."

"And its clear it was meant to be a one time thing. Agreed?"

"Its not clear to me. But I'll go along with what you want...without pushing the issue...because I respect you too much to...try and get you involved in something you don't really want."

"What...exactly...would you imagine we might become if this was something I wanted?"

"I wouldn't imagine. I don't do that."

"Jason! Please. Answer me. This is big. Do you want to leave here knowing where we stand or not? Cause I would prefer to not be left here wondering. That's just me though. Maybe you feel I'm bothering you with my incessant questioning. I do that, be warned, I question things to death."

"I know that."

"Right, of course. You know. You've known me for years. So you know."

"Yeah."

"Are you going to answer me or not?"

"What is the question again?" He really had to pay closer attention.

Thinking about kissing her till she moaned, then ripping off that silk blouse and letting his mouth go to work on her breasts till she was pulling at his hair in ecstacy, then sliding down that skirt and using his teeth to get those lacy, hopefully soaking wet, panties off her would not help him right now.

Alexis made things complicated. Jason liked things simple. But he wanted to sleep with her again so he was willing to let her put him through his paces. He didn't need easy. He didn't need uncomplicated. He just needed to be inside of her another time.

That felt right. After way too long of feeling nothing but wrong.

Alexis asked "If we have sex again don't you think it would lead to dating and don't you think that would be a disaster waiting to happen and don't you think you should leave while we can still say we didn't go too far today despite being extremely tempted to? Don't you think so too?"


	40. jason and alexis, part six

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon  
September 2010**

**Instant Addiction  
Part Six  
Mature**

Alexis asked, with her back against the door of her youngster daughter's bedroom, "If we have sex again don't you think it would lead to dating and don't you think that would be a disaster waiting to happen and don't you think you should leave while we can still say we didn't go too far today despite being extremely tempted to? Don't you think so too?

She paused and added "Don't you think its unwise to risk heartbreak over this?"

"No."

NO? she repeated in her head. No? So he wants to really go there...more than just to have some more hot sex...he wants to risk his heart on this? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

A long moment passed where he simply stared at her before he said "Alexis-."

"WHAT?"

"Are you okay? Do you want to sit down?"

"Perhaps that would be best." She sat on Molly's bed.

Staring at Jason standing there, in his normal Jason wear- jeans, black tee, leather jacket- looking like normal old hitman self, Sonny's buddy, Sam's ex, that Jason she knew so well but feeling like....her Jason...was very confusing for Alexis. Last night made her feel alive and wanted and delicious.

Today made her wonder if she was going to somehow get a lot more of last night in her life.

She swallowed hard. Jason rubbed at his head. "All I know is I don't want to leave here....thinking we're done."

"We're."

"What?"

"Nothing. Its just you used this plural...for you and I...we're."

"Are you feeling all right today?"

"I don't need a doctor. I'm just dazed. If Jason Morgan was in your house talking about having sex and dating and using we're then you would be dazed too. Wait, that didn't make sense...okay if...lets say Heidi Klum was in your house..."

"Lets say Alexis Davis." His tone was one hundred percent sexual frustration.

Okay. No more talking. Talking was for talkers. Alexis wanted to no longer be a talker so she bounded off the bed and practically threw herself on Jason, kissing him like she needed his mouth to get her air to stay alive.

XXXXXXXXX

What just happened here? Jason wondered as he lifted Alexis off the ground in this steamy, indecent, mouth wide open, tongue tangling, feel it in your groin, kiss.

One second she was saying she didn't want to risk getting hurt and the next she was saying he was some sort of amazing man that made her breathless and dazed, then she was kissing him. Jason was pretty unsure about why Alexis did what she did, and said what she said, and worried over what she worried over, but he was glad that she got past whatever was holding her back.

He'd been aching to kiss her since his eyes opened this morning.

He had scratch marks down his back from her that weren't healed yet, and he wanted to get some more. But not in her kid's bedroom. Still his brain was so foggy that he did start to push her against the dresser, when he realized that it was a mini child's size piece of furniture.

Jason jerked his lips back, breathing hard. "We're doing this?"

"I really don't know. I mean you said you wanted to, didn't you? Right? I understood...you to...have said you'd....take a risk on us. So that...means...we're doing this.....aren't we?" Her lips were swollen and her breathing erratic. Her eyes were dark with hunger, but also confusion lurked there.

"We're doing this," he repeated and then he grabbed her hips and ground against her, making her throw her head back and moan. "Damn....that's what I wanted to hear today."

"Bedroom."

"Lets go."

Fuck yeah. They were doing this. All that talking had been worth it. Even if he didn't know why she worried so much that he wouldn't want to date her. She was Alexis Davis....he was a man who could appreciate a gorgeous, intelligent, loyal, intense, cunning, brilliant, sexy as hell in jeans, gowns, and business suits hot blooded woman.

She was Alexis, who he knew since Michael was a baby. Hell yeah he would date her. He should have thought of opening with that sentence when he came through the door today. Then he would already be inside of her-the only place he really wanted to be now.

Because that felt right. He didn't want to have to walk away another time from something that felt so good...he didn't want to mourn her...he wanted to make her scream his name until she forget any man had ever been in her bed but him.

Jason followed Alexis into the hall, getting hard and hot just thinking about what they were about to do, pulling off his clothes as he did.

XXXXXXXXXX

She hurried down the hallway to her room. As they walked she stripped off her jacket, and tossed it on the floor, stripped off her silk blouse and it went to the floor, stripped off her shirt and threw it down near the door of her room.

She wasn't shy about her body in front of him-like she was sometimes in the mall when she tried on clothes and salespeople lied that everything fit perfect. There should be a law against doing that.

Alexis knew that Jason found her hot. The way his body reacted to hers the night before proved that to her.

She spun around in her room and faced him, to find his shirt and jacket were laying by his feet and he was yanking off his shoes and socks. As soon as Jason straightened, Alexis immediately started to lay kisses on his chest, while whimpering lustfully. He grabbed her ass and squeezed it.

"Jason," she said breathlessly, looking up into his eyes, that were filled with desire for her, "this is a surprise."

"Yeah," he ground out.

"The next time you see a woman on a balcony-"

He picked her up, her legs wrapped around his waist. "Can we talk later?" He walked toward the bed, kissing her neck as he did.

"Don't kiss her."

He put her on the bed, she lay there, propped up on her elbows, as his eyes devoured her. He grunted "Why? It worked out." Then he started to take off his jeans.

"Unless its me!"

"Got it." He kicked the jeans off, then the boxers.

She reached out and took him into her hands. He let out a deep seated moan. She loved the feel of caressing him. It was pure power and lust and insanely erotic. Her eyes drifted up to meet his.

He watched her hand moving up and down his shaft. Her tongue came out to lick him.

"Fuck," Jason cursed as she circled the tip of him.

She couldn't compare this to any other man she had been with...each were different, special in their own way...but none were like being with him. Alexis and Jason together were unique. It didn't remind her of anything else she'd ever known before. It was so much more wilder. So much more feral. Animalistic.

Alexis found herself pushing past the limits of what she would normally do, caressing places she usually didn't...and each time she gently squeezed here or ran a finger there....he jerked beneath her hand, into her mouth, and she felt like she was just the woman he needed in his life.

Who else got him like this? If he could really leave her today and find someone else that could make him this crazed then Alexis did not want the details. She liked that she could take Jason here though. She could match him move for move...and together they became more than they were apart....better...more intense...more alive.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason knew he was getting close to exploding. Usually he could last a while but her mouth, hands, the things she did with them, it was all too good. Too hot. Too erotic. Too wet and nasty and beyond what most women bothered to do all at once.

She was ruining him for other chicks. He didn't mind though.

"Alexis," he choked out. His tone a warning.

She let him slip out of her hot, wet, mouth but kept stroking him as he climaxed. He thought he seriously would pass out when she drug her finger through his release, as it rested on her chest, and licked that finger.

Whoa. He might not leave this lake house again. The lake house seemed a nice place to die. He could just stay here for good.

Jason knew he was losing his mind. But he didn't blame her. Hell, he had needed to lose it like this for a while now.

He lay down on the bed, panting and spent. Alexis starting kissing his chest and working her way down his body, to that trail of hair, which she kissed, making his gut clench. He pulled her up and brought her mouth to his.

One word went through Jason's head: Mine.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Later Alexis found him gripping her thighs as he stood next to the bed and pumped into her, hard and fast, like the night before, then harder and faster, harder and faster, till her mind was just a blur of colors but no images, and her ears were filled with the sounds of them, all the desperate words they let slip out of their lips, and the steady creaking of the bed, and her body...her body...that was his.

"Oh my GOD. JASON!"

All his.


	41. jason and alexis, part seven

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

** Instant Addiction**

**Part Seven**

This time they got to cuddle. Alexis rested her head on his still beating fast heart. She intertwined their fingers. She kissed his chest one more time. "Surprise me again tomorrow."

He ground out, barely able to catch his breath, "Count on it."

Her eyes drifted close. He kissed her sweat slicked forehead. Her eyes opened and looked up and into his. They shared a tender gaze.

Alexis realized she should have guessed he wasn't thinking about a no emotion fling. They might not know what they would end up but this was too powerful to play off as not emotionally charged.

Jason must feel it too. The way they became a whole new entity together.

She could do dinners, walks by her lake, sex in the backseat of his bullet proof limo (after it was checked for bombs, naturally), and whatever else Jason wanted to share with her. She could care more about his hurts, his losses, his dreams...about his son he couldn't see...she could offer a shoulder to lean on. She could give him herself...and she could try....because he made her want to.

Not just because the sex was good. This was Jason. The guy she knew for so far back she nearly forgot who she was before she came to this town and got caught up with these people. He was one of the few men on earth she knew really well...even if he confused her sometimes with his way of thinking and not speaking.

But this was Jason. Of course she wanted to date him if he wanted to date her.

XXXXXXXXXXX

He didn't think this would happen to him again in his life. That he would be in bed with someone that mattered. Someone he knew and trusted. Someone who got him. Someone who wouldn't wonder who he was...why he loved his chosen family, and why it took him so long to go back to his birth family, and why his son called Lucky Daddy, and why he couldn't go steal Carly away from Jax already and get it over with.

Alexis didn't have to say: What's wrong with you, Jason? Why are you so fucked up anyway?

She knew him already. She knew why he was cold, sometimes, and why he was loyal to who he was loyal to, and why he was lonely and why he needed her.

And if she didn't know the last part, then Jason would figure out a way to show her. Cause she was the talker. He liked action.

He wasn't madly in love with her....not yet. Give him time. He could see liking this for a long time to come. And that was more than he had in so long...so damn long.

He really did need her- and he knew that.

XXXXXXXXXXX

A few minutes later, when Alexis was nearly asleep, Jason ran his hand through her hair. "When are your kids coming home?"

She bolted up right, grabbed the clock and said "Any-"

"MOMMY!" Molly yelled

"Alexis! You here?" Ric yelled

Jason jumped up and hurried to the bedroom door to lock it. While Alexis whispered "Clothes! Put on some clothes...wow...that is a great ass..clothes! Now! Move it!"

"Okay, I'm moving!. You did want the door locked right?" he asked in annoyance.

"Of course!" she whispered as she put on her clothes.

"MOMMY! I'm home! Nadine made us deep fried frog legs! We brought you some!"

Alexis whispered "You can keep them," and then said loudly "That's great, sweetie. Mommy is changing. Go to the living room with Daddy, okay?"

"Alexis," Ric's deep voice was closer now.

Jason glared at the door, as he slipped on his jeans.

Ric went on "Hey. I think Kristina got Molly's sore throat. She was complaining about it but it could just be that math test she has tomorrow that she is trying to avoid."

"Okay. Thanks! I'll look into that!"

"Everything okay?" Ric asked. "You're not sick too, are you? I swear I can't get sick. I have court all week."

"I'm just getting changed. Can I have five minutes?"

"Sure. Take your time. Come on, sweetie, let Mommy finish up, okay?" His footsteps could be heard walking away, and so could Molly's.

Jason hissed out, under his breath, "Fucker." He slid on his shirt.

Alexis whispered "We can save the arguement about why you have to work harder to get along with him for another day, you have to go now." She opened the window.

Jason raised an eyebrow.

She said "Go."

He slipped on his shoes, saying to hell with his socks in the rush, and grabbed his coat. He walked over to the window. Raising one hand to cup her face he kissed her deeply. "When do you have time again?"

"For....what exactly?"

"Me exactly."

"I mean...sex or drinks and dinner or working on a legal matter or taking the kids to the park?"

"Would you....take your girls to the park...with me? Its dangerous."

"I know that. That's why the kids play in the backyard on their swingset. You can come play whenever you want."

He nodded and then climbed out the window. He looked back inside. "For all of that. There's your answer. Night, Alexis."

She stood there speechless as he slipped away, but she was well aware of one thing: now all the gaurds would know about them.

There was no way to secretly date Jason Morgan so she better, as Spinelli always said when he was eating chips on her couch with Sam, "man up" and face what was coming. Everyone was going to have something to say.

But it would be worth the hassle. Because Jason wanted "all of that" with her. She smiled as she left her bedroom and went into the bathroom to finish fixing herself up before she saw her kids.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason showed up at Carly's house around midnight. He had gone home, showered and fallen into bed for some much needed sleep, but he woke up just three hours later.

Getting dressed again he ended up on her porch, slipped his key in the door, nodded at the gaurds and went inside. Sitting on the couch, he flipped on a light and waited for her to come down.

If she was awake, she would have heard the door. If Jax was awake, he'd tell her.

So Jason waited.

Sometimes he had to wait hours. Wait for her to want water, or chocolate, or pizza at 3 am, like she did way too many nights. But she always woke up the nights he waited.

It wasn't ten minutes later when she came down, looking half asleep. Jax had woken her up, obviously.

"Jase," she said softly.

He rose from his seat and hugged her. She sat on the couch and he sat back down. She tucked her feet around her and pulled a blanket off the couch to wrap up in.

"Sorry to wake you."

"M.J. will need her bottle soon anyway. What's up?"

"You're going to hear things tomorrow...from the gaurds ...so I wanted to tell you first."

"What kind of things? Is there trouble brewing?"

"With the Feds, yeah, there is. And I need to talk to you about that but not tonight."

She stared at him for a moment. "Is this about Alexis?"

He nodded. "How did you...?"

Carly shrugged. "Her story about you hiring her sucked. She didn't sell it good enough."

"I did hire her."

"Before yesterday?"

"Today."

"Exactly. But yesterday she was blabbering on like a fool and I knew she was hiding something about you...something too personal to tell me. And Sonny was here earlier....he wants to know if me and Jax are stable."Carly's voice fell into a hoarse whisper "Usually that means he wants me back...but he's happy with Gia...so that means...he's afraid I want you back.....guess he just don't get that its not an option anymore."

With his voice filled with emotion, Jason choked out her name, as he felt it vibrate through every part of his soul. "Carly."

She gave him a sad smile. "So, tell me....Alexis?" She screwed up her face in a sign of displeasure.

Jason laughed through the tears he didn't shed. "Yeah."

Her voice was light and teasing. "I'm gonna need more than yeah!"

With a small smile he asked "What do you want to know?"

"Everything," she said, as if this was the latest movie at the theaters. But Jason knew she didn't want to know cause it was good gossip. She wanted to know because she wanted to know all his secrets and all his memories.

He hadn't wanted to tell her this today. He wanted to wait till he really had to tell her. But the guards would talk. He couldn't let her feel lied to again. Or shoved aside. Or like he was sneaking around on her again because he wasn't.

"It just started. We're...figuring it out. But I'm doing this so you should know that...and you should not fight with her about this...for me. Please."

"Just started...as in when?"

"After the wedding."

"Last night....so...you're here already."

"Yeah."

"Oh."

_She knows me way too well,_ Jason thought. But he would never wish that away. Carly's eyes told him what he hadn't quite admitted inside his own head yet. He came to tell Carly not just because of the gaurds but because he needed her to know he was serious about someone else....again...finally.

And this time she heard it from him straight out. Because this time he wasn't playing around.


	42. jason and alexis, part eight

****

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon

September 2010

Knock. Knock.

Knock. Knock.

"Well, get that, dummy!" Max told his brother as they sat in the coffee shop office.

Milo jumped up from his seat. He put on hand on his gun, situated at his hip, and asked "Who is it?"

"Alexis Davis."

Milo smiled widely and pulled open the door. "Hello, ma'am. Morning! Come on in."

She slid in with a smile on her face. "Hello, men."

"Hello, Ms. Davis. Good to see you. We'll just get out of your hair," Max said, but he threw Jason a very knowing look that said: You are one lucky mofo! Carly, Sam, Alexis...GOD! Why ain't that me?

Jason motioned for Max and Milo to leave, which they did, while he slowly stood up from behind his desk.

It was two days after Sam McCall became Sam Davis Hunter-Drake (long story, one Jason has heard and understands. He gets why names mean something. Why he can't be Jason Quatermaine ever again. Why it was all different when Michael bore the last name Morgan. Why Carly named two of her babies after Jason. Names meant a lot.)

Jason had been trying to concentrate on his paperwork- like he would on any other Monday morning- without much luck. Not only was he distracted by memories of Alexis' mouth wrapped around his cock...he also had the Giambetti brothers babbling away in front of him, like they did often, about the football game the day before. Jason choked down cup after cup of plain back coffee to stay awake and to try to get his focus back. The night before he spent more than an hour talking to Carly before then going on a long ride on his motorcycle before falling back in bed at four am- only to get up at eight.

He was exhausted. But in a very good way. His eyes worked up and down Alexis, as she stood there in her business suit. She looked even hotter than normal because he knew that underneath that button-down exterior lurked a sexpot the likes of which the men in this town would be shocked to find out about.

"Hey," Jason said to Alexis, the word long and drug out, filled with heat and intensity.

"Hello again." She dug into her purse and pulled out a pair of socks. "I was on my way to the office and I thought that I would drop these by since you might need them. They're very nice socks after all and who knows if they are a particular favorite of yours or something. So here. Your socks. I better head on my way now.....it was good to see you again, Jason." She held out the socks toward him.

He fought back a smirk as he walked around his desk, and trapped her against the front side of it. With his body pressed to hers, he heard her breath hitch in the back of her throat, as he slid his hand over her hand, took the socks, and dropped them on the desk. "You don't need excuses to come here."

"As I mentioned," she said breathlessly "they could be a favorite pair of yours...so I wanted you to have them back...that's all."

"Alexis," he ground out, as his mouth dipped to kiss her neck.

She softly admitted "I wanted to start my day off like this before I faced this evil wench judge I have to go before in an hour."

"Mmm." He feasted on her soft, sweet smiling skin.

"Jason," she whispered. Her hands ran up his back.

He couldn't get enough of tasting her, having her hands on him, knowing she was going a little nuts over him. This was more than he thought it would be when they kissed on the balcony. She was more.

Cute. Hot. Life altering. Life infusing. Breath stealing. Fucking perfect.

When was the last time he had perfect? He didn't even want to go there in his head. Just leave it at...it had been a long ass time...and he had been sure that perfect was gone forever for him. Then there was Alexis and her green gown. Maxie had always told Jason that fashion mattered...hmmm, looks like she was right for once.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis hadn't meant to show up at the coffee shop. Rationally she did not want to be there at all. Of course not!

Be where all the guards could see her and see she was hot for Jason? No, thank you. No, siree. That was not what she called a good idea.

But on her way to work she had started thinking about Jason, how her body was still sore from Jason, and how she wanted some more Jason in her life....so she made a left turn at Main, and gave herself what she wanted most.

And she needed coffee. So....she could justify the delay in getting to her office. Plus, if she got to see Jason, it would improve her mood and then she would do better in court, her client would be happy, her new practice would flourish.

Plus he needed his socks. His feet might be cold.

So she had her excuses piled up when she went into his office. She tried not to blush when the Giambetti brothers looked at her and she could see they had heard the rumors already. Then she told Jason her sock alibi and pretended like she was just going to leave....hoping he would not let her leave..cause if he did let her leave...she'd have to walk behind that desk, straddle his lap, and give him a lesson in what happens when you tick off a Cassadine.

Let her leave? That was crazy talk! She had braved his guards and the gossip mill for his kiss. He better come correct and give it up.

Jason did, first licking and kissing and sucking her neck, then her jaw and finally his mouth joined with hers. Sweet, freaking bliss.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Gia Campbell- Corinthos strolled through the coffee shop looking like the spokesmodel that she used to be. She was dressed in an outfit she got on a shopping trip with Maxie, wearing lipstick Serena suggested she buy, sporting shoes that Diane found on her last trip to Paris, with a cross around her neck from her brother Taggert, and one hell of a rock on her hand from Sonny.

She had come home and melded right back into Port Charles life flawlessly. Now she was best friends with Nikolas, Lucky, Emily and Liz. But she wasn't one of their silly Scoobies. She never had been and never would be. That gave her a certain sort of freedom though. Because she was also friends with Johnny and Maxie, with Jason and Carly- her girl from back in the day, and the only woman that Carly ever liked Sonny with- and she was friends with Serena, Lucas Jones and just about every gaurd Sonny had on the payroll.

That included her two favorites- those gorgeous Giambetti brothers. She smiled as she reached the door to the office and saw Milo. "Hey. Just how often do you work out? Every day? Every hour? What does it take to look like this?"

She often mentioned his great physique. Sonny didn't like it but Sonny couldn't tell her how to talk to people.

Milo blushed deeply. Everyone knew she was a flirt. She had such a good marriage that nobody took her words seriously. Because ask this woman about the man that was waiting for her at home? And she lit up like the fourth of July.

_Who would have known? _the whispers around town went._ Sonny Corinthos was actually good for somebody. Shocker._

Milo stuttered "Well it's a mix of diet and working out, really...uh...I could give you some recipes. Not that you need them!"

She chuckled. "Thanks. But forget it. Sonny's kitchen is off limits to everyone but his father and Alexis. Don't ask." She rolled her eyes in a good natured way. "He thinks he can teach her to not burn water. I say he's insane to try but you know my husband."

Milo nodded.

Gia added "He in?"

"No....uh...Jason is...uh...with someone."

Gia smiled widely. She leaned closer to Milo. "So its true then? Jason and Alexis are doing the dirty dirty?"

Milo gulped. "I couldn't confirm..."

Gia leaned back. "Its cool. I wouldn't want to put you in a bad spot. Hmmm. Sonny said he would be in by now. I better call and see what's keeping his ass...hope he hasn't gotten himself into any trouble." She pulled out her phone, dialed and then, from behind her, a phone rang.

She turned around, smiling from ear to ear, as Sonny walked across the coffee shop. His eyes warmed a million degrees at the sight of his wife. "Hey there, you."

When he got to her, she wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled even brighter. "I need money."

He laughed. "What else is new?"

"There's this yatch."

"We have a yatch."

"Its prettier."

Sonny his head he told her "Do I get to see it before I write a check?"

"No. Its ours already. The dealership is waiting for you to call in confirmation."

"You are dangerous, you know that?" he teased. "Where's your gaurd? I pay Gino good money to keep an eye on you."

Gia slid from Sonny's arms. "You pay him to keep me alive. I don't need any sitter."

"Really? Should I ask Mac about why he locked up you and Serena after that girls night out? Since you're an angel and don't need anybody keeping you out of trouble. That right?" he teased, stopping a fight that could have reached nuclear levels.

She chuckled. "Get me my yatch and I'll forget how bad you piss me off with your chauvinist shit."

"What's the dealer's number?"

Gia smiled widely and reached in her purse, she passed him a business card. "And tell him we want the platinum package."

"What's this gonna run me?"

She pouted. He shoved the card in his pocket and grumbled "Okay, okay, move your cute ass. I got work to do."

Gia and Milo, looking completely ridiculous, flung themselves over the door.

Sonny asked "What the hell?"

Milo stuttered "Boss...Mr. C....boss, uh....Jason is busy in a meeting...uh."

Gia grabbed Sonny's hand and pulled him over to the counter. "Get me a coffee. You know what I like."

"What's going on in my office?" his eyes bore into hers.

"Lets just say...I think Jason is gonna teach Alexis how to cook, instead of you. Now about that latte...I'm waiting, baby."

Sonny looked back toward his office, just as Alexis came walking out, looking completely flushed. She walked past him, in a daze, and left.


	43. jason and alexis, part nine

** Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part Nine**

Jason was wiping at his mouth, wearing a small smile, when Sonny walked into the office. "Hey. We got to talk about this federal investigation."

Sonny closed the door. "Yeah, yeah...that can wait. We got to talk about something more important first."

"What's going on?"

"That's what I want to know, Jason. What is going on...between you and Alexis?" Sonny motioned with his hands and titled his head and generally acted very concerned about the answer he would get.

Lives depended on this answer. Jason knew that. He had planned to talk to Sonny but not for a while. After they told Sam. Carly knew now and that was all that Jason worried about. He could explain to Spinelli, Sonny, Emily and the rest of the people he cared about later...when he knew more...when he was sure that Alexis wouldn't get gun shy on him.

He'd simply tell them: I'm with Alexis now. Leave it at that. The less talk the better is how he always saw life.

Jason let out a very long breath. "Where are you getting this from? Someone say something to you?"

"No! I got eyes. Come on. Talk to me. What's the deal? This is...this is the mother of my kid, my niece, too. This is.....Alexis. So tell me that you ain't yanking her around and that we don't got major problems right now. Tell me that when Carly comes running Alexis won't be SECOND!"

Out of nowhere Sonny had just lost it, as if he couldn't stop himself. He started out talking in a low gravelly voice but it got more and more agitated till he was screaming. Sonny turned away, panting.

Jason said calmly "Alexis understands about Carly."

Sonny shook his head, looking down. "When did you get interested in Alexis? Will you at least tell me that much? Damn, tell me something here!"

"At the wedding."

Sonny turned to look at Jason. "The wedding? What wedding?"

Jason gave him a wide eyed look. "Sam...you know. Sam got married Saturday."

"I know that! I was there! Gia had to buy three dresses for it. But....that was two days ago. I don't get...that was only two days ago."

"Yeah."

Sonny rubbed the back of his fingers across his lips. He let out a ragged breath. He asked, desperately, "You gonna treat her right or not? Huh? Can you give me your word or not, huh?"

"I'll treat her right."

Which was more than Sonny ever did for Carly. But Jason didn't say that because Carly made her choice...to stay with Sonny...and Jason made his...to be the best friend. Just like Sonny made his choice about Alexis. And Sam made her choice about Jason....when she could have came back to him the year before, and at the last second she picked herself instead.

She made the right pick.

After another series of choices and twists and turns and life changing days, they were here. And Jason had figured he would be the one left lonely again. But he wasn't. And he didn't plan to let Sonny take this from him.

Sonny had taken enough. All after Jason let him. No more. This time Jason wouldn't let anyone mess up what he wanted. And he wouldn't mess it up either.

He knew what the cost would be. No more great kisses, and no more hope, no more hearing Alexis babble and hearing her breath hitch in her throat, no more creamy white thighs, and no chance to see her eyes get dark with hunger for him.

He would not mess this up. That was not an option.

Sonny said "Treat her right then. Keep your word."

Jason nodded.

XXXXXXXXXXX

She had a date with Jason Morgan. A date with Jason. She was now dating Jason. That unbelievable truth kept repeating in Alexis' head as she headed off to work that Monday morning, after leaving the coffee house throughly kissed and left speechless.

Driving to her law office she was lucky she didn't crash her car for all the memories that were shooting through her head. Her back against the wall on the balcony, her dress strap sliding down as Jason really thought about fucking her in public.

How could she get anyone crazy in lust like that, she just did not know.

She remember his mouth sucking on her shoulder as he thrust into her and she drove herself down onto him over and over again, while she sat on his lap in the hotel room. Her screams when he took her in her bedroom. And just a few minutes before, back in his office, the sweet and tender way he asked, after he broke their kiss, "You wanna get some dinner tonight?"

It was a simple sentence but, for them, it was a turning point. A date.

She had asked "What do you have in mind because, as I'm sure you can remember, I don't cook anything but popcorn well. I microwave like a pro, though. And I'm getting a little better at the stove top but I don't think you should chance it. Voila cooks a lot for the girls. That's why they look so healthy. So I can't cook for us tonight and I don't know about public...I mean...Sam isn't home and I can't call her on her honeymoon to say this...and we really should tell her before we go public, don't you think?"

"I'll cook."

"You can cook?"

"Yeah."

"I should come to your place?"

"Yeah, you should.....can Viola stay over with the girls?"

"I'll ask her."

"Ask her," he ground out, bending to connect his lips with hers.

One more soul healing, sensual, full of promise of lots of naked goodness, kiss and Jason opened the door to show Alexis out. "You have court, right?"

"Right," she whimpered, grabbed her purse and stumbled out the door, past Milo and a room full of blurry faces.

Right. She had court. Couldn't just push Jason down on the floor and ride him till he exploded inside of her...and she felt that rightness that he always made her feel...that aliveness. Sex was sex, but it always led to emotions for her. Whether they were good or bad emotions. With Jason sex led to wanting more sex, and wanting to stay important to him. Because he was making her life interesting again.

She just hoped Sam didn't hate her for this. She wouldn't lose her daughter, not for anyone. She wouldn't give up Sam to get Jason.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Matt could not believe this stunning woman was his wife. He watched her, as she sat with one leg bent, her head resting on her knee, staring at him, on the bow of their rented boat in the Caribbean.

He had known love before her. Once. And after Nadine he was sure that he was done for. He just couldn't believe it. His best friend left him that wrecked.

She got scared and she gave up- after she had come back from visiting that stupid Ohio farm for a month and came home to find out that he had developed a friendship with Sam. But Matt hadn't wanted Sam then. Nadine swore she saw the truth in his eyes though. Swore that he looked at her different, kissed her different, loved her different.

And different wasn't enough for her. Not when they used to have beautiful.

So Nadine left him. Left him crying, with a ring in his pocket that he never got a chance to show her, and his heart shredded.

Months later it was Sam who took him out drinking, when he finally was sure Nadine was not giving him another chance. After the quick, hot, beautiful thing he had with the nurse changed into a friendship that he could count on more than their broken love. Sam did tequila shots with Matt, danced on a table for him, made him laugh and then she took him star gazing.

That was when he fell.

Staring at the night sky, she lay her head on his chest and whispered about Danny, Lila, Cody, Evelyn, Amiela...all the fake names...how she couldn't have a baby...Jason, Jake, Carly, Lucky, Liz...she told him everything. The sun came up.

And then she told him the thing that made his new love become shaky. Sam had went to Nadine and told her that she had feelings for Matt. Went to her the day she came back from Ohio. Asked her if Matt and Nadine were serious or not.

For a while, Matt couldn't look at Sam. But he missed her....and he remembered her soft confessions..and he knew that life was really living with her. So he went to her. Told her off. Kissed her like he meant business. And not much later they were planning a wedding- to her mother's utter delight.

Now they were sailing together and talking baby names. When they got home they would look for a surrogate to carry their child for them. Their little Davis/Hunter- Drake genius con artist in the making that they were both aching to create.

Sam suggested "How about Noelle?"

Matt grunted. "Noah would like that too much. I'm not looking to make him that happy."

She smiled. "Okay, we can go another way. What about Star?"

A boyish grinned tugged at his lips. "No son of mine is getting named that. He'll be dubbed a pussy from pre-school."

She giggled. "For a girl! Come on! You like it, don't you?"

He walked slowly across the boat, wearing just board shorts and flip flops, and pulled her into his arms, lifting her onto her feet as he did. Her body pressed against his. "I like you. I know that."

Brown eyelashes fluttered at him as she searched his gaze. "Forever?"

He kissed her nose. "Try to chase me off. You know what Aunt Raylene says about fidelity, don't you?"

"Nadine's rubbed off on you so bad. But I love her for that. What does Aunt Raylene say, Matt?"

"That the only animals that mate for life are swans and beavers and you can't make a man behave

like either if he don't wanna be. Well now its swans, beavers......and me."

Matt knew Aunt Raylene had been wrong. More animals mated for life. But a lot of her sayings were not technically accurate. They were still good words to live by.

Sam smiled widely. "Star Davis Hunter-Drake?"

"I look forward to meeting her."

"And if she's a boy? Matthew Junior."

"No. I got to put my foot down there."

"Why? I like your name."

"I like how you say my name in my ear....all breathless and desperate....but I don't want to name our firstborn after me. Maybe a kid down the road. Third or fourth kid, talk to me then. After I name one for that annoying brother of mine and you name one for that partner of yours."

Sam jumped in his arms, her feet dangling as she held onto him. "God, I love you!"

"Cause I'm very lovable."

She chuckled happily, with tears in her eyes.

Matt added, softly, as he held her tightly, "Our first son should be Daniel."

"I love you," Sam repeated.

Somewhere...Matt hoped...Nadine was happy too, and that she knew he appreciated what she had sacrificed for him.

Sam whispered, reverently, "Daniel Davis Hunter-Drake....God, I really want to hold my baby."

"You will."

(Daniel is traveling tonight

on a plane.

I can see the red tail lights

heading for Spain

and

I can see Daniel waving good bye.

God, it looks like Daniel.

Must be the clouds in my eyes) (Elton John)

Note- When talking about Samantha Davis Hunter- Drake, Star Davis Hunter-Drake, Daniel Davis Hunter- Drake, Patrick Davis Hunter-Drake, and Damian Davis Hunter-Drake, the Davis is always a middle name not used in everyday life. Matt is now known as Matthew Hunter- Drake, MD.


	44. jason and alexis, part ten

****

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon

September 2010

****

Instant Addiction

Part Ten

"I have dresses!" Diane said as she walked into the lake house on Monday night, followed by Maxie and Lulu who were carrying more dresses. "Jason will drool, I promise."

Alexis' eyes got wide. Great, now the loudest best friends to ever previously hate each other's guts in the whole world- otherwise known as Maxie Jones and Lulu Spencer- were now aware that Alexis was dating Jason. Why not just take out space in the Port Charles Herald? Really._Good work, Diane,_ Alexis thought, as she shot her a look.

Diane asked "What? Oh them. Ignore them. This is fashion. Sacrifices must be made."

Maxie chirped "Jason? Really? Please peel that nasty old leather jacket off him and burn it. You would be doing society a favor."

Lulu set down her dresses. "I wouldn't peel nothing off Jason before asking Carly. In fact, if my cousins asks, I was never here."

Alexis let out a sigh. "Just let me see what you brought."

She wanted to look good for Jason. No, scratch that. She wanted to look amazing. So amazing he would think that green gown from the wedding was child's play. So amazing, in fact, that dinner got very cold as she got quickly naked.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Spinelli was playing pool with Jason when he got a text message. After reading it his face contorted with what, Maximista

Stone Cold was hitting it with The Mother of the Goddess...Alexis Davis....who Spinelli thought of as his own mother now...Sam's life giver...Samantha his partner in private eyeing, and part of his big extended family.

Well, this was a news flash to say the very least.

"Your turn to break," Jason said.

"May I inquire about a private matter of the romantic variety?"

Jason ran his hands down his face. "Who was that message from? Milo?"

"Maxie." Spinelli spoke quickly "We do not have to discuss it if you do not wish to reveal yourself presently!"

"Its fine," Jason said, in frustration.

Spinelli raised an eyebrow. "So how did this entanglement come about with The Goddess Mother...

or as she is more commonly know, Alexis, who you know I have grown close to over the months since McCall Jackal P.I. was formed."

"It just happened."

"Have you harbored romantic secret notions about her for months? You are aware I am here for support if you ever wanted to discuss anything, even intimate things. Though we no longer reside together in this humble abode I am right across the hall should you need my counsel."

"I know that, Spinelli."

"So is that an affirmative to having secret romantic thoughts?"

"No. Its not. I just saw her at Sam's wedding," Jason threw up his hand in a way that said: You know how I must have been feeling at that wedding.

With just a few people Jason could give a look that said more than words. Carly always read his looks perfectly. Spinelli messed up their meanings sometimes but each day he got better. Which was good for Jason cause he didn't like long drawn out explanations.

Jason went on "And something changed."

"Out of the clear blue sky?"

"Yes."

"I can see that it took you by as much surprise as it has I.....I do want The Goddess Mother to be happy and there is no man I would pick for her that could be better than you, my mentor and friend....so....you have my blessing."

Jason let out a long breath.

Spinelli smiled. As Spinelli texted back Maxie, Jason headed upstairs to shower.

XXXXXXXXXX

Looking absolutely stunning, in a black, low cut knee length dress that had a split up the side that revealed so much leg Alexis was worried she would get taken in for indecent exposure (hence the coat she had on over said dress and said indecent split) Alexis sat in a cubicle at General Hospital with two cranky, sick little girls.

She had called Jason to cancel and tell him that it looked like both Kristina and Molly had strep throat. She had been completely dressed and ready to leave when Voila brought the girls home from an art lesson early. They were both feverish and miserable.

Without taking time to change Alexis decided to bring them into the ER. They had fevers that were high enough to worry her, and she took no chances with her babies.

"Mommy, can I have my ice cream now?" which she asked every five minutes, even though Alexis had told her that she couldn't till they were done here.

Before Alexis could answer, Kristina told Molly "You're not getting any ice cream right now so stop crying about it already."

"I don't think that doctor is coming back ever!" Molly cried, as tears came to her eyes. "I wanna go home!"

"Stop being a whiny little baby," Kristina told Molly.

"Kristina! Don't talk to your sister like that. I know you're cranky but so is she."

Just then the curtain was pulled back to reveal Nadine and Jason. Nadine smiled brightly "Look who the cat dragged in, girls."

"Hi, Uncle Jason," Molly said.

It took Ric a long time to get over the fact that his daughter called Jason her uncle. Alexis still figured Ric hated it, but he did it silently now, at least.

"Hi," Kristina said, grumpily. She was her Daddy's little girl and could work a bad mood like nobody's business.

Alexis decided she would call Sonny, even though before she figured she wouldn't bother him, because she could use some help with these little cranky faced kids she had on her hands. Nadine already called Ric- who Alexis also said not to bother- because Nadine was all about fostering a closer Daddy/daughter bond between Molly and Ric. He would probably show up soon, Alexis knew.

But neither Ric nor Jason would make Kristina feel better. Only Sonny could. Alexis had denied her daughter Sonny so many times that Kristina didn't even ask for him anymore. She just saw him when the adults let her.

If he came down here tonight, Alexis was sure, it would make Kristina feel better than any medicine could. Alexis berated herself for not knowing what her daughter needed sooner.

Jason said to the girls "Hi. I heard you both have sore throats. You know what Michael and Morgan like when they have sore throats? Ice cream."

"That's what I told my Mommy!" Molly cried.

Kristina rolled her eyes.

Nadine said "I betcha I could track down some ice cream around here some where." She looked at Alexis "Would that be okay?"

"You're a god send," Alexis said.

Nadine said to the girls. "Be back in two shakes of a otter's tail."

Molly giggled.

Alexis finally focused on Jason. Their eyes met and held. He touched her arm and nodded to the hall. Alexis told the girls she'd be right back.

When they were outside the cubicle, with the curtain closed, they walked more down the hall for privacy, and then Alexis said "You didn't have to come. They'll both be fine."

"Are you okay?"

"Stressed. Do you have any idea what its like to have to entertain two kids who are both hot, tired, hurting and mad at you for making them come down to the hospital? Its not the most pleasant experience I've had this week."

"Can I do anything?"

"Really, you don't have to be here."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"I don't want to bother you or burden you. You expected a lovely evening and instead you get this hospital that you hate as a consolation prize."

Their eyes held for a long moment. Alexis opened her mouth to once again tell him he could leave when Jason looked her up and down and said "You look...great."

Those three words set her skin on fire. "This? This is Diane. Blame her. And Maxie and Lulu. Though Lulu was the lone vote for jeans."

Jason nodded.

Alexis asked "Was Lulu right?"

Jason reached out and undid the belt on her coat, so he could see her dress. His eyes flared with heat. He leaned close to her and spoke against her ear "Lulu was wrong....but I like jeans too."

Alexis smiled. Jason moved back and they just stared at each other.

She said "What a lousy first date."

He shrugged.

She asked "You don't agree? This is miserable, if you ask me."

"Its not to me."

"How could that possibly be true? You're just being polite. Well, don't bother. I'm a seasoned vet at this kinda stuff with my girls. And its always gross, tiring, and just one hectic, schedule ruining mess. This is why they dubbed modern motherhood The Mommy Wars. No one can ever pull it off without feeling imperfect, frustrated and inadequate. Sitting here with my daughters sick and waiting on a doctor who seems to have fallen off the planet is the height of helplessness. And not a good first date at all."

"Listen, you want me here or should I go? I don't want to intrude."

Alexis stepped closer to him. She whispered "I want you here. Molly wants Ric. Kristina wants Sonny....I want you, Jason." She searched his eyes.

"I...I...can't be this for my boys...but...I'd like to be the guy that is here with you with your girls."

She nodded and motioned for him to head back to the cubicle. He took her hand. She stopped cold and looked at their hands. She hissed "Public."

"I don't care...if you don't care."

After a long moment, Alexis relaxed. They headed back to the cubicle. But now they were revealed to all of Matt Hunter's co-workers. Port Charles was just a very, very small place sometimes.

Six degrees of separation would have been nice. That town was more like one or two, at the most.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Late that night, they ended up sitting in Alexis living room. Molly was laying on the couch with her head on Alexis lap, while Alexis was resting against Jason, who had been reading Molly a book till she fell asleep

Kristina went home with Sonny and Gia. That was where she needed to be. So she could learn that when she really needed him, her Daddy would come running to save his princess.

Alexis had changed into sweats and put Molly into her pajamas.

"She's out like a light," Alexis whispered.

"You want me to carry her to bed?"

"Would you? You're a lifesaver. My back thanks you."

Jason smiled slightly, stood up, and then he lifted Molly into his arms. When he came back to the living room Alexis was laying on the couch. She started to sit up when she saw him. He said "That's fine. Lay back down. I should take off anyway."

He grabbed his jacket and keys.

She sat up. "I'll walk you out."

"Go to sleep. You're exhausted." Jason slipped on his leather jacket and shoved the keys in the pocket.

"I really am."

He walked over, motioned for her to lay down, and covered her in a blanket that had been on the back of the couch. He crouched down, smoothing back her hair.

Alexis whispered "You made a good call, Jason."

"You're tired. I know."

"No, not that......when you said you didn't agree with me."

_"Don't you think its unwise to risk heartbreak over this?" Alexis asked Jason._

_"No."_

His eyes darkened, not with lust, but a different sort of hunger....a hunger for this...for sweet connections and commitment...and for learning how to be together, after years of just being around each other but not truly investing in each other.

Jason nodded.

Alexis smiled. "Smug, aren't you?" Her eyes twinkled at him. She reached out and played with his hair. He caught her hand in his and kissed her palm. She let out a happy sigh. The same hand he was softly kissing, cupped his face, Jason's eyes drifted close as she caressed him gently.

This was their version of romance. And she loved it. It felt palpable...and yet easy. She finally was breathing a lot easier now.


	45. jason and alexis, part eleven

****

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon

September 2010

"I don't like it," Ric ground out harshly, as he stood in Alexis' living room four days after the girls were both diagnosed with strep throat.

Alexis had a week from hell. Days spent in court doing a trial with a judge she hated, and nights spent with the kids who were sick. Both Kristina and Molly didn't take being cooped up well and we're running their mother ragged. Plus Jason went out of town so Alexis missed that energy he brought to her world. That added excitement and spark. That reminder that she was more than a mom, aunt, lawyer, godmother, friend, and ex to two men who still made her crazy. Jason made her crazy too. But in a way that sent her body shaking in spasms that she thought, when it happened, would never end. He made her crazy in a fucking hot way that she absolutely loved.

Now he was finally back in town- after four horrible days without him- and he was about to come over.

Unfortunately Ric had stopped by to drop off medicine for the kids, and this was his first chance to tell Alexis- in more than a bitter laced tirade left on her voicemail- just what he thought about the fact she was dating Jason. Nadine had filled him in on it. Nadine and her complete honesty with her Richard.

__

Thank you so fucking much, Nadine

, Alexis thought, mad at the farm girl for the first time ever.

"I don't care what you like, Ric."

"We're co-parents. You have to care. I get a say."

She was scrambling to clean up the living room from all the kids toys before Jason showed up. Shoving a big pile of stuffed animals in a hope chest, Alexis said, "Of course you get a say in the girls. You know that."

Over the last year Alexis and Ric had forged a better friendship- all brought on after Sonny and Ric had a huge emotional conversation about Claudia and the baby. It brought the brothers closer. Somehow, Claudia carrying a child that could belong to either of them had become a bonding point. Bizarre but true. It might have helped that Alexis went to Sonny and eased a lot of his pain for a few months there...until Gia showed up...and Cruz hit on Alexis, and it was back to their own corners. Not that they had been thinking about sleeping together.

Okay, maybe she had been thinking about it, but then she thought again. Because he was married to psycho Claudia back then. Alexis would not get in the middle of that marriage. She wasn't anybody's fool.

Alexis told Ric "But you don't get a say in who I see socially."

"See socially? What a pleasant euphemism for jumping into the sack with a HITMAN!"

"SHHHHH!"

"Sorry." He shook his head wearily.

For a moment, she saw real traces of the broken man he used to be...and that hurt her to see that ugliness flaring in his eyes once more. She might never love this man again but...okay...she cared about him. She liked the changes Nadine made in Ric. How he was more confident and secure. How he smiled more. How he could hang out with Sonny now. How they were all co-parents. Nadine made Ric into the man Alexis used to believe he really was...the man he lost in vengeance plots and insanity in panic rooms and jealous, desperate affairs later on...but all it took, it seemed now, was him hearing about Jason being with Alexis and he was back to being the abandoned little boy he started out as. Yelling for someone to listen to him but everyone turned their back.

She had no choice but to ignore him this time though. He wasn't taking Jason out of her life. No way in hell. She was a Cassadine. She didn't get ran over for nobody.

Their eyes warred. Ric sighed. "Reconsider," he begged.

"You have Nadine. Why is this any concern to you?"

"Just because I love Nadine does not mean I stop caring about you, Alexis. I care about you! I care that you don't end up dead because your 'seeing socially' a killer!"

"Be quiet! If the girls hear you, I swear to God, I'm gonna kick your ass into that lake outside and tell the guards to stand on the shore with their uzis so you can't get out."

"They don't have uzis."

"You know what I mean."

Ric stepped closer to her. "Why would you want Jason in your life? Is this...because..."

"Don't even try to understand it because its not any of your concern."

"I don't think you even understand it. Are you doing this...is there a possibility...this is all because Sonny married Gia?"

"That was four months ago. Do you think this is that much a delayed reaction?" She moved around Ric and kept straightening up. "Besides, why would I care who Sonny married? I mean he marries, or tries to marry, or marries and then annuls the marriage, at least once a year."

"This time its going to stick, though. We both know that."

She started picking up crayons off the table. "Help me with this mess, would you? Be useful instead of just annoying."

Ric sighed and started to pick up DVDs of kids movies. "Sonny is worried about what you're getting into with Jason too, you know that, right?"

"I don't know anything like that. I haven't spoken to him about anything but the girls. Maybe he...surprisingly....is trying to respect my boundaries." She picked up markers from the table. "Could that be something for you to try? What do you think?"

"Maybe he just doesn't want to be the reason you see the truth about this whole thing."

"What truth is that?" She turned and looked at him.

"There's no way you'll ever last with Jason. He's beneath you in every way. And if he doesn't get you killed, he will surely break your heart. I've seen it happen to Liz and you saw it happen to Sam. He's only about one woman-"

"You're clutching at straws now!"

Ric raised an eyebrow. "Can you really stand to lose a man another man to Carly?"

"Thanks for the medicine," Alexis said through clenched teeth. "Now get the hell out of my house."

Ric looked down, shaking his head, accepting defeat. "Fine! But keep my objection on the record."

"Duly noted, you selfish prig."

Ric walked closer to her. A small smile tugged on the corner of his lips."Well, that was uncalled for."

"And you coming in here- and thinking you have a say in my relationship- wasn't?"

"I'm sorry I upset you."

"I'm sorry I called you a prig, prig."

He kissed her cheek while she stood there stiffly. "Nadine says she wants to sit with the girls tomorrow afternoon, give you a break, since Voila has the weekend off. Three sound okay?"

"Tell Nadine she's wonderful, and her boyfriend is a jerk." Alexis gave him a small smile.

Ric smiled more fully and said softly "Yeah, well, look at your boyfriend."

"I don't call him that. Now go away."

"Be careful, please."

"Good bye."

Ric smiled at her, trying to make some sort of peace before he left.

Just then Jason knocked on the door.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason felt his blood boiling with rage at the sight of Ric Lansing kissing Alexis' cheek and then they smiled at each other.

There were so many days Jason wanted Ric dead. And others when he accepted, because Carly still cared if Sonny went insane, that Ric couldn't be murdered by Jason. But that didn't stop him from wanting to beat the living hell out of the man till he was looking at Jason through two black eyes and a mouth full of broken teeth.

Ric was a menace, a liar, a snake, a threat, and all around just Jason's most hated enemy. So to see him touching Alexis made Jason's jaw clench.

To remember that Alexis used to sleep with this guy....it made Jason sick. But the past was the past. Best left in the past, as much as it could be.

Still she didn't have to smile at Ric now.

Of course she got to do whatever she wanted, and knowing Alexis like he did, even if Jason was the type to tell her what to do she was the type to tell him to go straight to hell with his orders. She'd do what she wanted.

For Molly's sake, and her sake only, Jason knew that Alexis had to keep being friendly with Ric.

But seeing it. Seeing it made him want to snap Ric's neck.

Alexis walked over and opened the door. Thoughts of Ric fell away from Jason's mind as his eyes settled on Alexis.

She was wearing jeans. Hot damn. This was a good day after all. "Hi."

"Hello. You're home," she said in this dreamy tone, then snapped out of it. "I mean, of course, you're home because you're here, which is not your home, but by home I mean Port Charles.....you're back. Come in."

Jason walked inside.

Ric said "Morgan."

"Lansing."

"I was just going."

"Good."

Ric shot him a disgusted look and left. Alexis closed the door after him. The room filled with all this tension and heat in the second they were alone together. Alexis turned back to face Jason, and leaned against the door.

He looked at her. Those brown eyes of hers...dark, deadly, world taking over Cassadine eyes...were hungrily looking at Jason- like a piece of meat and she was half starved to death.

He'd be dinner for her...anytime. Tell him the place. Jason started toward Alexis and she started toward him, they met in the middle of the room and, without saying anything, started kissing.


	46. jason and alexis, part twelve

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**,

September 2010

Instant Addiction

Part Twelve

_Mmmm. Mmmm. Mmmm_ she thought as she gripped his face while his tongue slid into her hot, waiting mouth, _I missed this. He tastes so good, feels so good, makes me feel so alive. I really need this right now._

By the time they broke apart, she was clutching at his shirt- a blue button up business shirt, instead of his normal black or gray tee- and not even caring that the gaurds could look in the window and see. Now if the girls wandered into the living room and caught Mommy kissing Uncle Jason....well, that would be awkward to explain. She needed to sit down with them soon and tell them about the new changes to Alexis relationship with their relative.

But how would she explain it?

She murmured "Dressed up for me? Or was your out-of-town business something requiring a suit and not a gun?"

His voice was low and throaty, his eyes locked on hers, when Jason said "For you."

She smiled widely and stepped back. "Well, I'm afraid its wasted on me. Fish sticks don't require any sort of fancy attire."

"I thought we'd go to dinner."

"I really don't think I can leave the girls...besides I'm not dressed for it, and then there is the whole being in public thing. We have to put Sam first...whatever that means....you agree, right?"

"Yeah."

"So, fish sticks it is."

"No, wait. I didn't agree to fish sticks. I agreed about Sam. Fish sticks...no. Carly feeds those to Morgan and I can barely look at them without gagging."

"They're good!"

He shook his head.

She added "Have you tried putting ketchup on them or tarter sauce? You're not supposed to eat them plain."

"Look, I know some people like them. Spinelli does too but-"

"That's right he does. Spinelli loves my fish sticks. He actually finds my cooking superb. He's the only person who ever told me that. Did I ever mention I love that kid?"

"He loves you too."

Alexis knew that. Spinelli had became a real fixture around her house. He seemed to take to the family environment. Alexis understood all too well what that could mean to a former loner- the kid left alone way too often during childhood. She had wanted to give that kind of family to Zander once. And now Spinelli, with those big needy eyes, lapped up all the attention she couldn't give her other boy.

She said "Well, I know that he is a very good friend to Sam and she needs all the friends she can get. She's flourishing with Matt but I worry still, you know? I remember...and I won't forget....when she was just one drink away from destroying herself....and I won't put her back there...not for anything."

"I understand."

She started for the kitchen. "If you don't want fish sticks, come on, lets see what else I have. Maybe you can do something with what Voila bought, because its fish sticks or popcorn if its up to me. Wait!" She spun around, smiling. "Sonny taught me how to boil noodles al dente. How about pasta? The sauce has to come from a jar, though."

"Another time. I want to take you to my place."

"Voila is off till Monday."

"I found you a sitter, if the girls are okay without you. How are they feeling now?"

"Better. But still cranky at times. Who is this sitter? Carly?"

"Would you have a problem with that?"

"I trust her with my goddaughter and my best friend so no. But then again I never had a choice with all that. Jax made me cause he wouldn't budge on the idea that he's in love with her. I still consider it a flawed theory but who is to say? They haven't talked divorce in what? How old is Maggie Jay now? Almost ten months."

"Its not Carly. Its Spinelli. Since...Sam is on her honeymoon...he hasn't been able to come over like he usually does a couple of nights each week to hang out with you, her and the kids...so I think he misses Kristina and Molly."

"He could come over even if Sam isn't around. I should tell him that. I thought he knew." Alexis walked back over and sat down on the couch.

Jason sat next to her. "He should be here in ten minutes. I told him seven thirty."

"Thank you for this. Its very thoughtful."

His hand went to her jean clad thigh. "Spinelli said he'll sleep over, if you want...."

"I want."

Jason leaned closer to her, murmuring, "You play pool?"

"Hmm?" she could barely breath with his lips so close to her.

"I keep thinking about you and my pool table."

Images of herself naked, with her ass on the edge of that table, and Jason driving into her, as she dug her fingernails into his back, exploded in her mind. Moans filled her head, heavy breathing, begging, pleading for him to touch her there...where she needed to be stroked so she would start screaming hoarsely...and then feeling him come inside of her.

She was on birth control.

That first night they had this rushed, half dressed conversations about diseases and decided to not use condoms. It was a sign of trust...that he wouldn't lie about his medical health...and without thinking too much more about it he was inside of her and she was glad she knew him well enough to believe his words. Because it felt amazing to have Jason, without any barriers, being clutched by her walls as she stopped thinking so much with her brain and just let him make her body feel all that she craved.

That sinful, perfect, body shivering goodness that she now associated in her head with just one man: Jason Morgan.

XXXXXXXXXXX

I keep thinking you and my pool table, he had just murmured, with his lips nearly touching hers.

She whispered, breathlessly, "I'm very adept at billiards."

A very small smile tugged at the corner of Jason's lips before his mouth came down onto hers in a slow and tender kiss. He loved kissing this woman...like loved it to an insane degree...because she was fierce and independent and not easy on him, but he didn't want anything less than extraordinary.

Alexis was extraordinary.

he brought life back into his world. And Jason needed that, wanted that, and would do whatever he could to keep that.

Pulling back, he looked into her eyes- all glazed with desire for him- and nearly had to idea to take her right there. The guards on the deck be damned. But the girls were home. "I should go say hello to my nieces."

"Yes," she said in a daze "go say hello...they will love that."

Jason stood up and headed for the back of the house.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis was sitting in the passenger seat of Jason's SUV. She was ranting. "It was so mortyifying! Mommy, why are you having a sleep over with Uncle Jason? Oh, I don't know Molly....he's hot naked! What was I supposed to say? I'm his lawyer and we need to work till dawn reading books and talking about how he should stop killing so many people?!"

"Alexis-"

"Thank God Molly asked before Kristina. So I could at least have a trail run with the one young enough to buy anything! But Kristina.....she knows now. I had to explain we are dating and she's old enough to know what that means. She gets it. Molly doesn't though. I just hope that she isn't scarred for life because of my answer to her...you know kids get confused and you're her Uncle!"

"She seemed fine with your answer."

"You really think so? Jason is Mommy's friend. Was that good enough? Its not like I spend the night at Diane's! Well, I have gone out of town with her and Kate so...maybe...its not that odd. Maybe."

"I think its fine. She was busy playing video games when we left. She didn't look scarred."

"Are you sure? I trust your judgement."

"Trust your own. You're a great mother, Alexis."

"Yes, I am. I work hard at it."

"I can tell."

Alexis sighed.

Jason said "I can take you home, if you want, cause I don't want you upset."

"I'm okay...now. Thanks for talking me down."

"No problem."

"Have you had moments like this lately, Jason?"

He raised an eyebrow.

Alexis went on "Did Carly lose her mind about us? Does she even know? She hasn't snuck up on me with a hose to drench me like she did before. And she didn't trip me in the lobby of the hotel when I went to see Jax. But she was on her cell. I think she was distracted. I'm still expecting to be tackled, at the very least, when she hears about us."

"She's known since Sunday."

"How? Sonny blabbed, right? I knew he would."

"I told Carly."

"Why in the world would you want to do that so soon?"

"I promised her.....no more secrets."

"Well you are entitled to your privacy. Do you have to tell her everything? Did you," her eyes got wide "tell her everything?"

"No!"

"Good!"

"I...." he pulled into the parking garage at Harborview Towers "wanted her to know."

Alexis tensed up. She fidgeted with her purse, looking out the window instead of at him.

Jason parked. He got out, walked out and opened Alexis door. She slid out and he moved closer to her. He raised his hand and pushed some strands of her hair out of her eyes.

He said "Long week."

"Yes."

"If you don't want to spend the night...its okay."

"You want me to, right? I mean you arranged for Spinelli to sleep at my house and I went through that torture of telling the girls Mommy is dating again so I figured we are on the same page....that my spending the night here is worth going through whatever stress we have to. Agreed?"

Jason pushed her against the side of his SUV, kissed her until she was whimpering against his lips, and then said "Yeah, this time I agree."


	47. jason and alexis, part thirteen

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 13**

**Mature**

The air crackled with delicious, hungry, mouth watering tension as Alexis and Jason stepped onto the elevator, at Harborview Towers on that Friday night, almost one week after they slept together for the first time.

The elevator doors slid closed.

She snuck a peek at him from the corner of her eye, as they stood there in complete silence. Tonight wouldn't be about going fast and getting crazy, she believed. This date was about figuring out what they wanted or if they could give it to each other: emotionally speaking, that is. They could give each other orgasm after orgasm for days on end, that was the simple part.

It took one honest conversation to figure out the hard part. If they wanted to risk getting hurt should this not work out. He was willing to, he said, and that was enough for her to want to risk it too.

Tonight they would start the dating part of this relationship. That meant hours and hours of verbal foreplay before she could feel his hands on her ass again.

She wondered what he might think about a quickee, then the verbal foreplay, then the pool table.

If she was good at anything- other than gate keeping- it was making plans and schedules to keep her life in order. She opened her mouth to say: _Thank you for dressing up for me...but you look a little warm...._

Before she could say anything, though, his hand shot out and pressed the stop button for the elevator.

She swallowed down a gulp and then moved away from Jason, leaning against the left wall, as he turned and their eyes met.

Pure, unadulterated lust sparked in his steely blue gaze, making her choke back a whimper at the sight of him wanting her that intensely. Her tongue licked at her lips, wetting them. He moved like a lion toward her....on the hunt....about to possess his prey....about to own her life with his mouth.

One hand went to flatten next to her head the wall, while his mouth dipped down and licked at her pulse point on her throat. Alexis whispered "Cameras."

"Its handled."

His body brushed against hers, setting up a chain reaction that caused her nipples to tingle shooting sensations throughout the rest of her that she felt race down her spine and across her rib cage at the same time before rushing through her center right down her legs and curling her toes. She arched against him as he kept nipping and sucking on her neck.

Alexis all but moaned the words "You planned this."

"Just for three days."

"At least..."she whispered as her hands moved to his belt "it wasn't..."

Jason replaced her shaky hands with his and yanked off his belt, then undid his pants, pulled down the zipper over his throbbing erection, as she watched him reveal himself to her. A full body shiver wracked over her.

Dry mouthed, she finished her sentence "Four days."

All the days they had been apart.

Jason took her hand and brought it to his hardness. He groaned in pleasure as she started to stroke him. "The last day.....was the...pool table."

XXXXXXXXXXX

This was a sight he would never ever forget: Alexis on her knees with him sucked into her hot, wet, perfect, tight fitting mouth, nodding her head, giving him permission to release down her throat.

Seeing that, while feeling her tongue working over him, and her hand squeezing his balls, sent him past the point of control. He was completely out of his mind over this woman. And he loved it. Loved every second of it. He didn't give a good damn if that made him weak or needy or pathetic. Whatever. He'd be all that over her. Sure. Sounded good.

At this point he just wanted her in his life.

She made him weak....and for the first time in his whole damn life he was not scared of the weakness that came from needing a woman more than he needed control.

Jason gripped Alexis' head as he exploded, letting out a deep moan, while she swallowed and swallowed and swallowed. Throbbing and jerking into her mouth he felt this flood of possessiveness over her. She was so good to him. He told himself he would be good to her too. Not just when they were like this...not just having sex....he would be good to her in every way she needed.

Till she needed him so much Alexis Davis wouldn't ramble about how they didn't work....she'd ramble about how they needed to keep going with this. And then he'd strip her out of her clothes and say: I agree.

He'd given up what he wanted enough for twenty lifetimes. He'd be damned if he gave Alexis up too.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Ric walked into his home, still ticked off that Alexis was now screwing around with Jason. He heard a noise coming from his kitchen and smelled, what he would have sworn, was pot roast in the air.

"Nadine?"

She came walking into the room, hurrying and wearing the expression of a kid caught with her hand in the cookie jar. She wore a pink apron with ducks all over it. "I broke in. Don't call the cops. You weren't answering your cell and it was the act of a desperate cook."

He smiled slightly, despite his bad mood, at the sight of how adorable she really was, with her guilty eyes and country clothes. "Sorry. You were stuck waiting on the doorstep?"

Nadine said "And I would have waited and waited, Girl Scout's honor, but if I didn't start the roast we wouldn't eat till midnight. So I took matter's into my own hands. Can you forgive me? Aunt Raylene raised me better than being a cat burglar, I promise."

He walked closer to her and asked "Why don't you have a key by now?"

"Must be that you never gave me one."

"We should fix that."

"You think so?"

"How did you get in anyway? Break a window?"

"Picked the lock."

His eyes widened. "You do always surprise me."

She wrapped her arms around his neck. "In a good way? Or a run for the hills and hide way?"

"A very good way," Ric promised as he slowly nipped at her bottom lip, eliciting a happy sigh from her, Nadine's way of telling him she wanted more than just playing around....she wanted a deeper kiss...she wanted him.

That amazed him. Every time she stood in the same room with him, and didn't slap him across his face, Ric thanked God for this woman. For the soft, sweet, gentle goodness she brought into his cold, black world.

Though it wasn't all a bed of roses. They had their wild moments- locked in break room at General Hospital screaming at the top of their lungs about how they both didn't want anything more than the one drunken night they shared...locked in there by Leyla because she could take no more of Nadine's blabbering about Ric. Nadine yelling with tears in her eyes as she begged him to, even if he wasn't with her- cause of course she didn't want him with her, she said- to please take care of himself better from now on. Love himself more. Be good to himself. Be happy.

He didn't even really remember happy till she became the woman in his life. It was this distant foggy feeling that he used to find with Elizabeth. Then Nadine was with Ric and he was touching that kind of perfection again.

How he could ever get by without her again he did not know. Give her a key? Hell he should have bought a ring by now. He knew he wanted her as his wife, what was he waiting on? Perfection shouldn't have to wait for no man.


	48. jason and alexis, fourteen

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 14**

**Mature **

Alexis smirked as she stared at a wicker basket that sat on Jason's bathroom counter. It was filled with stuff from an expensive bed and bath boutique in Crimson Pointe Galleria. She loved that store.

There was a note propped against the basket with her name written on it.

She opened it: Enjoy.

She smiled. Enjoy. She planned to enjoy every second of this night. Alexis opened up the tooth brush, brushed her teeth, washed her face, fixed her make-up, put on lotion, squirted on some more perfume from the bottle in her purse, and then headed downstairs again.

She looked around the Penthouse. For a second she was thrown back in time. She was at the door, Sonny was in the hall. Popcorn was popped.

If this memory taking over her mind, as real as if she stepped back in time, had happened to her four months ago- the day Sonny married Gia- she would have sobbed herself sick, where no one could hear, and then called Diane to go drinking. But today she smiled. It was a good memory...a memory that led to two daughters (because there would be no Molly if there was no Kristina Adella).

That night when Sonny was at her door, when she lived in this Penthouse, was over a decade ago. It was fine to not feel just the same as she did then. To feel so much more for Sonny, and to know who they would always be to each other. To know that their connection could never die.

But the road had twisted- so many damn times- that they were in a different future than she had imagined back then. And she was happy right now. So the pain had been worth something, after all....worth the hurt because they got the daughters, the connection, the future they didn't expect.

Smiling slightly, she walked into the kitchen to look for Jason. "Hello, can I ask...did you redecorate recently? It looks different around here."

"Maxie did, this week."

"She get inspired?"

"She said it had to be done. I stopped arguing with her. It doesn't change her mind ever." They way he said it left no room for questions but Alexis wondered if she was the reason the place got redone...new woman, new couch and bed and sheets. Maxie was smarter than she looked, really.

Alexis glanced down at the wok that Jason was cooking in. "What are you whipping up?"

He stood there, with just a black, sleeveless t-shirt on and his dark slacks, but no blue shirt anymore.

"Stir fry. You want to help?"

"That depends. How do you feel about dying from food poisoning?"

He let out a short laugh. He didn't laugh much but he really had a great one. He so rarely allowed himself to relax to the point where he let it out, though. "You just watch then."

"Agreed." She looked into the wok. "Looks delicious. Who taught you to cook?"

The second she said it, she knew the answer. Alexis groaned and added "Sonny!"

Jason smiled slightly.

She smiled back. It was a nice moment. One that made her a little nervous. But not so nervous that she couldn't breath. Good nervous. Alive. Aware. She said "I can do something. I can open the wine."

"Wine?"

"No wine?"

He made a face that said: Oops. "I drink beer. There's some bottles of tea too. Some vodka in the freezer...oh yeah and there's champagne."

She raised an eyebrow. "No wine but champagne?"

"Maxie ordered a case. Pay on delivery."

Alexis laughed.

Jason said "I told the guy to take it back but she was here and, you can guess, she started talking a mile a minute till...yeah...he just left and I had all this champagne."

"What did she want it for? Starting her own wine cellar on your dime?"

"She said for celebrations. Yeah...I don't know...that's how she thinks."

Alexis smiled. "I think I like how she thinks....that's scary."

"Hell yeah it is."

Still smiling she said "I'll take the champagne. Thank you."

"There should be something around here to chill it in."

She laughed. "Something? Well...I suppose I can rough it."

"Sorry."

"Don't be, Jason.....I'm having fun so far."

"Good."

The way he said it, with his voice so deep and filled with possessiveness, made goose bumps rise on her skin_. This is going to be a phenomenal night_, she thought as their eyes held on each other. For a long moment Jason didn't look away.

Smoke rose out of the wok. Alexis yelped "Jason!"

He snapped back to attention. "Shit."

"I thought you said you could cook?"

"I can."

"I can burn too. Anyone can do that."

"I can cook." He dumped out the burnt food and said "I just need to start over. It will be good. Don't worry."

"I trust you."

The wok was forgotten as Jason pulled Alexis flush with his body. Looking down at her, in her jeans that made him watch her ass every time she left the room, he murmured "Thanks," before capturing her mouth in a wickedly, erotic kiss.

XXXXXXXXX

Nadine sat on Ric's couch, with her feet tucked up underneath her, as he drank his scotch. She reached out and let her fingers tangle in his hair. "What's got your smile turned upside down tonight?"

"I went to drop the girl's medicine off before I came home."

"Uh-oh."

"She won't listen!"

"Richard."

"I know you believe I should let sleeping dogs sleep because of whatever Aunt Raylene told you but-"

"Because a sleeping dog never bit nobody."

"That may be true but dating Jason has gotten a woman shot before. Alexis' own daughter. Sam can never carry a baby now because of wanting to date Jason. She's lucky to be alive at all. It will be no different for Alexis. If she doesn't care about the danger, I have to, because someone has to consider the girls in all this."

"And tell me, Mr. Considerate, were you considering those girls on the night you slept with Sam? Where were the girls then, Mr. All About Your Girls, hmmmm?"

"That's not fair. You shouldn't throw back in my face what I've told you and punish me for being honest. I wanted to keep all that, and the rest of my past, a secret but you insisted on honesty. So be fair about it."

"You know I'd never try and rub your mistakes in your face. I'm sorry if you felt that way, even for fraction of a second. What I was trying to say is that....you still loved the girls but you did what you did..."

"And it was a mistake. Like Jason and Alexis are a mistake."

"That's their business. We need to mind our own beeswax." Nadine reached out and took his hand. "Its not that I don't care what happens to Alexis, of course I care. I care like mad crazy amounts of caring! But she's a big girl...let her make her choices...cause she let you make yours....remember? Me."

He leaned over and kissed her. "I remember....you."

"Don't forget."

"Never."

"Richard.....I'm gonna pray that it all works out for Jason and Alexis, that they are happy and safe, and that it all works out for us....because you might be a hard man to pin down...but I want to pin you down. I want to give you this dream come true happy ending that you don't even believe is possible, but I know it is. And I know I can prove it to you....without scheming, either. Or much scheming, at least."

He smiled. "I believe in you. That's the one thing I do still believe in."

Nadine squealed softly in happiness and climbed onto his lap, as he held the scotch away from his body so it didn't spill. She caressed his cheek. "Did I ever mention that I'm head over heels, old fashioned, forever and ever amen..." her voice fell into an emotional whisper "in love with you?"

He smiled and chuckled. "Not exactly in those words, you haven't."

"I am, Richard," she said solemnly.

"Marry me then."

She jumped off his lap. "What kind of proposal was that, you hound dog! I....I...I...can't believe you would...just spit it out like that....where's the romance?! Where's the big moment! I didn't even know you were thinking...of course I hoped you were....but I didn't know. And then you just say....oh," her voice got soft "were you serious?"

He set down his drink and stood up. He swept her off her feet and headed for the door.

Nadine cried "Where are you taking me?"

"To get you a big moment."

"Richard!" she cried happily.

He stopped and kissed her senseless. When she was finally smiling, dazed and quiet, he headed out the door. It wasn't until they were a block away that she smacked his arm and said he better go back and turn off her pot roast, cause if he ruined it he was going to be in so much trouble with her.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"I need to schedule some time with you next week," Alexis told Jason as they sat at his kitchen table, eating dinner.

"Okay."

"We need to go over what is going on with this federal investigation into your business. Diane has kept me up to date, as much as she knows, but I have the distinct impression she doesn't know everything that you and Sonny do." Looking into Jason's eyes, Alexis said "I need to know everything."

"I'll talk to Sonny. We can all sit down. Go over it."

"Rico charges are very serious. You do know, if you go down, then they all go down. From Bernie all the way to Milo and everyone in between-in for a little, in for it all. That's how it works."

He nodded.

Alexis said "So you can't go down. The girls love Milo dearly. There would be hell to pay from them should he get locked up."

"You should meet his mother. She beat me upside the head with her purse before because he got shot in the shoulder. Milo can't get arrested."

"Its cute that you fear Mrs. Giambetti more than you do prison."

"She's not Mrs. Giambetti. Maximus divorced her something like twenty years ago. Then married five more women after her."

"A real player."

"An idiot. That guy ever comes back to town and we're going on vacation that week."

She smiled. "We'll see."

Jason nodded. He could see a future with her. When it was right, it didn't take Jason Morgan long to know it felt right and it should keep going. He had felt this rightness before...and it felt too good to walk away from like he did before when he was so sure that he could live a life of misery for the greater good. This time he wanted a life that felt good....he wasn't dead yet, he was sick of living like a dead man walking.


	49. jason and alexis, fifteen

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 15**

**Mature**

Alexis was all tranquil and relaxed when she walked into the Penthouse living room after dinner, carrying her glass of champagne, with Jason walking behind her. "Do you know what Diane said at Sam's wedding? That I would literally be out of my mind to not go up to your suite."

"Diane knows?"

She looked at him and laughed at the expression on his face. She didn't realize he liked keeping things strictly professional with Diane and Bernie. Milo and Max were like family, they saw and knew everything, but Diane and Bernie were kept at a comfortable distance.

Alexis answered, as she leaned against the pool table, her jean clad ass resting slightly on it. "She is one of my dearest friends. I have to tell her everything."

"You have to? Okay then." Jason threw up his hands in a What the hell? joking kind of way.

As they stared at each other his eyes filled with lust and all but devoured her. He looked at her like she was candy he wanted to nibble from head to toe. All the air was sucked out of the room when he started slowly stalking toward her, yanking off his shirt as he did.

Alexis joked "Eager, aren't we?"

She set down the glass on a nearby table.

Jason didn't say a word, his light eyes just went darker and more intense the closer he got to her,

reaching out with one hand to pull her back to the pool table. He rested his hands on either side of her, a low moan escaped the back of his throat right before his mouth hit her neck.

A moan that said she belonged to him tonight.

It seemed to Alexis he could not get enough of her neck, and she was not complaining because when he kissed and sucked and licked at her pulse point her temperature rocketed, always turning her into a shivering, aching, inferno...hot, wet and ready for him.

Her hand came up to tangle in his short dark blonde hair. He must have liked that because Jason pressed himself roughly against Alexis, and she moaned in delight at the feel of his hardness....all for her. She threw her head back, letting her hair hit the pool table, and arched her body against him, spending sparks through her at every place their bodies met.

Jason hauled her fully onto the table, undoing the button on her jeans with a quick flick of his thumb and forefinger. She lifted her ass and he pulled them down and off her. He moved between her legs, as she titled her head and his mouth settled onto hers in a tongue tangling kiss. Her hands wrapped around his back, slipping under his shirt, feeling all those gorgeous hard muscles that made her heart race whenever she saw or touched them.

His hand caressed her thigh. He pulled his mouth away from her, leaving her breathlessly panting.

_Jason, Jason_, she thought, his name repeating in her head, _Jason...this is Jason...and this is right...OH MY GOD! Jason.....I could really do this for a long time....be with Jason...be Jason's woman....wow._

His voice was a low demand when he said "Tell me what you what."

She swallowed hard.

He repeated "Tell me."

"I want...." her words trailed off. Her breathing got more and more shallow.

"Say it for me."

"Your mouth on me."

He sunk to his knees and started to lay soft, tender kisses on her thighs, as the moonlight fell over them in the darkened room. She started shaking, in anticipation of that mouth moving from her thighs to lick at her slick, wet folds. Jason took his time, kissing and caressing each thigh, making her whimper in need, before he slipped a finger beneath her lacy black panties.

The feel of him sliding against her wetness made her jerk with pleasure. With feather light strokes he teased her until she was pushing against his finger, needing more pressure and faster strokes. Jason used his mouth to drag off her underwear. The sight of this strong, intimidating man doing that for her...to her...got her even more turned on, to the point she was throbbing and every touch was like an electric shock to her system. She withered and moaned as his mouth began to lick, with long slow strokes, against her center, with her legs thrown over his shoulders.

His words were against her skin as he demanded "Tell me again...what you want."

"I want....oh...yes, there..there...oh!"

"Tell..." he blew on her "me."

"I need your mouth on me....now."

In an instant Jason lifted her up, carried her to the couch and laid her down. Sliding a pillow under her ass he stared for a long moment between her thighs, till she closed her eyes because it was just too much to see him wanting her that badly.

He murmured "Gorgeous."

She felt his mouth on her, giving her just want she craved this time. Not soft or slow teasing-quick, frantic, invading- until she was clutching with both hands at the arm of the couch, behind her head, and her whole body was raising up off the couch, bucking against his mouth as he sucked her clit while thrusting into her with his fingers.

He kept up his ministrations as she rode out a body shattering orgasm. Only when she completely went limp, with a sweet satisfied smile on her face, did Jason stand up, kick off his shoes, socks, jeans and boxers and then crawl onto the couch, sliding in behind her. He turned Alexis to face away from him and slid into her from behind, his hand worked her breast, roughly- just the way she liked- and his deep strokes sent her into another orgasm right away. He kept thrusting into her and it heightened and subsided and then, minutes later, when he was sucking on her neck, and getting closer and closer to coming, his hand slid down to rub at her clit.

He had caught on that first night that she needed that to really have a screaming, loose control moment. And every time he gave her that moment. When she felt him flood her with his release one last orgasm clenched her walls, milking him for all he was worth, as she let out a loud moan while he cursed in her ear "Fuck....fuck...fuck....damn! Oh, fuck...so fucking sweet."

Nothing sounded better to her ears then the sound of Jason Morgan coming undone.

XXXXXXXXX

Nadine climbed out of the car, sleepy since she just woke up, and instantly tears sprung to her eyes. Ric had refused to tell her where they were going and eventually she fell asleep as they drove on the interstate for long hours: in search of a big moment.

The kind she used to want Matt to give her. Until her heart broke and she realized her doc wasn't gonna be her husband. Fate had other things in mind. So she gave him away....and she cried for months and months, while she learned to be just his best friend...and then she was in his wedding last weekend. By that time she was so deep in love with Ric that she was smiling over Fate and Fate's crazy schemes, not as angry as a hornet's nest that she had been screwed out of marrying a doctor.

Because she thought maybe Fate got it right. She wasn't meant for a Prince, as hot as he was and as much as she loved that little boy he had and the castle, and she wasn't meant for the sweetest, most perfect doctor in all the land. She was meant for this imperfect lawyer who needed her most.

With her eyes flooded with tears Nadine looked around the farm she grew up on. "You brought me home, Richard."

In the early morning sunrise he dropped to one knee. "Its this place that made you who you are... and that makes me love this little piece of dirt just as much as you love it.....Ohio, I never thought I'd love anything about Ohio this much...but I do, Nadine."

She whispered, tearfully, "It's a real fine state, I'll tell you that."

"If it makes women like you, then yes, it really is." He stared into her eyes for a long moment. "Its probably unfair to ask you to be my wife....I've only ruined every chance at happiness I ever had...so much so that I scare myself...but I promise not to ruin you. I would leave you before I let myself lose my mind and hurt you."

She fell to her knees and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Don't you dare talk about running out on me, mister." She kissed him, softly and sweetly, with tears running down her cheeks.

Ric whispered "I never expected you."

"Of course not! I'm very unexpect-able!"

He chuckled. "Yes, you are that. I never thought any woman could make me feel quite like this again, but you have, and I do want to marry you. When I said that last night it was not a spur of the moment realization....I hadn't planned to ask you then but I planned to ask you someday....so....will you marry me, Nadine Crowell? Be my wife. Let me be the happiest man in Port Charles for once....its my turn."

She smiled widely. "Don't be such a greedy Gus! Everyone can get happy endings!"

He whispered "Is that a yes?"

She pushed him onto the ground and laid on him in the grass. "Yes! Yes! Yes! What took you so long? I wanted to beat Matt to the alter!"

"Sorry!"

"I love you, Richard, so very much."

Just then they heard a screen door creep open. "Who's out there?"

"That's my Uncle. He has a shot gun and bad eyes. Just don't make any sudden movements."

Ric knew that a life with her would be wild. But it was just the life he wanted.

Nadine had saved him from utter despair after Claudia's baby was born and the DNA test was done. It proved Ric was the father, and so he had wanted to bring his newborn daughter to live with him, but the doctors had other news for Claudia, Ric and Sonny.

News that changed everything.

They had discovered that Claudia had a rare disease. She would die within three years. Because of that Sonny agreed to let her live out her life on his island and Ric agreed to let her keep the baby there with her.

There were guards that watched Claudia's every move. She couldn't escape and she couldn't mistreat his child.

But leaving the baby there meant he had to miss out on most of the precious moments of Antonia Dominica Lansing's first few years of life. Little Toni would be a toddler before she really got to know her Daddy. That ate a hole at Ric, until Nadine came along and showed him that life could be good still. That they could make a family together. She helped him get along with his brother and Alexis, and she went to visit his baby daughter with him. She forged beauty out of ugliness...in him and his world.

She made him over. And he would love her forever for that. Forever.


	50. jason and alexis, sixteen

**Note- There is a lyric change in the song- the word "for" is changed to "on."**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 16**

On Saturday morning, Jason walked out of his shower and into his bedroom to see Alexis sleeping in his bed. Her long brown hair fanned out on his white sheets. The sunlight cut a swatch through the room, falling on her, basking her in its glow.

She took his breath away. He'd looked at her almost every day for over a decade but not until he really needed her...and some relief from misery...did he look at her like this. And she looked damn good to him now.

Jason knew it wouldn't always feel quite like this. Time changed and rearranged everything. He was prepared for time to fuck with his happiness eventually but for right this second he could stand at the bottom of his bed and just enjoy the sight of Alexis laying there.

Hot. Loyal. Brave. Never broken by this fucking shit hole town and all it did to them. By the business Jason was in...and how it kept trying to ruin her...but it couldn't. She was a Cassadine and she ruined people, not the other way around.

He could have asked several different women to go upstairs with him after that wedding last week (Lainey looked good to Jason, then there was always Olivia who had a real thing for him, or Kelly or even Kate, who looked at him like she'd like to have some intense hate sex to pay Sonny back) but no other chick could have filled in the empty spaces in his life so quickly and completely.

Jason was not one to get mushy. Only a few people made him that way. But he could admit the truth in his own head: he wanted to keep waking up to see Alexis in his bed.

His life was not done, like he used to tell himself. He had time to feel good left. Time to take just a little bit of happiness for himself again. It was about damn time he did something about his miserable little existence. And that something was not adding more pictures to a lockbox. It was adding Alexis to his everyday life.

There was no fear. When its right, its right.

(Closed off from love

I didn't need the pain.

Once or twice was enough

and it was all in vain.

Time starts to pass

before you know it

you're frozen.

But something happened

on the very

first with you.

Pain melted to the ground,

found something

true.

And everyone's looking around thinking I'm going crazy) (Leona Lewis)

Jason heard a familiar pounding on his door. Since he was dressed in just jeans, he quickly grabbed a t-shirt from his door and jogged downstairs. He slipped on the shirt, and still barefoot with wet hair, answered the door.

"Carly," the word was infused with warmth, and a million things only she would understand.

"Hey, Jase. I'm glad you're home." She walked in, carrying her daughter. "Guess who misses you?"

Carly thrust Maggie Jay Jacks into Jason's arms. He smiled and held his god daughter. "Hey." He pressed a kiss to her forehead.

She was just ten months old, with bright blue eyes and a shock of light blonde baby fine hair. Jason really thought she was beyond beautiful and perfect. She grabbed his nose. He chuckled and told Carly "I know you didn't come by just because Maggie missed me."

Carly was looking around his place. For a second he wondered if it looked obvious what had went on the night before but he couldn't see anything that hadn't been cleaned up already. Though he hadn't told Carly he was having Alexis over last night had been his first night back in town after four days away, and Carly wasn't stupid.

The next words out of Carly's mouth were "I won't stay long and interrupt your date."

There was a certain feeling Jason got when talking to Carly about her husbands and his girlfriends. It was not a good feeling at all. More like a heart clutching, hold your breath, shut down your brain feeling. He tried to push past it. "What do you need?"

"Nothing important. I was just taking Maggie to the park and we drove past your place, and I wanted to see how Maxie redecorated."

He knew better than that. "You're snooping. Quit it."

"What, Jase? I wanted to see what she did. Where is this couch from? Is it imported?"

"You wanted to catch me with Alexis."

"I've caught you with enough women to know I don't like it. Why would I put myself through that?"

"You tell me."

Maggie Jay let out a cry, her face turning red, and reminding Jason of Carly. He bounced her until she was smiling again.

Carly walked close to Jason and touched his arm. "I just wanted to see if you're happy with her...like you thought you would be last week....so....are you?"

He just looked at her for her answer. Its all he needed to do. In truth she had her answer the second he opened the door- like she knew she would when she dressed her little girl in a pink sundress that morning and plotted to crash Jason's date.

Carly went on "You have great instincts so I should have figured!"

She leaned against his arm, staring at her daughter and added "M.J. did miss you. Are you coming over tomorrow night? If Morgan's team wins their baseball game they'll be league champs and you know they're gonna win because he's gotten so much better now since his days of running the bases backwards for t-ball. I'm having cake and ice cream for him and he wants you there."

"I'll be there then."

"Six thirty."

He passed her the baby, kissed Carly's forehead and then said "Have a good time at the park."

Carly smirked. "You have just a decent time with Alexis."

Jason shook his head at her logic and laughed. He opened the door for her and she left. He let out a long breath. He could handle this. They could handle this. It was better than with Robin, Brenda, Sam or Liz. All of those times were messy. Jason made them messy by lying. Courtney was complicated- every day and every moment complicated. But Carly supported that at least. She'd support this too. Looking at Jason she'd know and she'd get on board.

He trusted and loved her enough to believe in her. And this time he did things right, he told her the truth without waiting months and months for her to figure it out herself. He didn't blind side her and so she didn't feel disrespected. He was getting better at this. It had only taken a decade to start to get the balance just right.

His phone rang. He walked over to the desk and picked it up. "Morgan."

"Jason," his sister Emily's voice broke.

"What's the matter?"

"Jason, its..." she whimpered.

"Tell me what's wrong."

He heard crying and his heart raced in panic.

A different voice came on the line. "Hey, its me," Liz said "Lucia is at General Hospital. She has meningitis. Can you come down and sit with Emily? She needs you."

"Has....has someone called him?"

"Not yet."

"Tell Em I'm on my way."

XXXXXXXXXXX

Elizabeth Drake hung up the phone at the nurses desk and then wrapped her arm around the back of her friend. "He'll be here soon."

Emily nodded. Her eyes were haunted. Just a year before she didn't know what the hell she was going to do about being pregnant with a baby from a relationship she called a fling- back when her head was a wreck, back before she even had her memories back, when she was Rebecca running from her feelings for Nikolas. And who did she run to?

The exact arms of a man who she had no business tangling her life up with, and now her baby daughter's life.

She couldn't call him. See him. Want to lean on him. Want to believe in him. Not when she knew better. He loved another woman now. Emily had told him he didn't belong in her life and he believed her. But he was a good father. He should know his girl was sick...Emily just couldn't think straight right now.

She needed to be held. She wanted to be held by Lucky, her best friend, but he was on a stake out. She really needed her brother Jason to come there, hug her, and make her feel like her daughter was not about to die.

Liz said "Let me call Johnny."

Emily whispered "Call him," then she turned and headed back to the Neo Natal Intensive Care Unit. Her fourth month old baby girl was so sick that her life could end today.

The baby she didn't want to have...the baby she couldn't live without now. Lucia changed her whole world. Healed her when she was lost after Helena brainwashed her, and made Emily feel a soul shaking connection to a mob prince.

A mob prince who believed her when she said she didn't want him. That was what she believed too, at the time,- five months pregnant and confused as hell. But now, all these months later, when she looked in her little girl brown eyes she saw the man who made love to her when she was wrecked, and who she told that she never loved at all.

Such a lie. Whatever she did feel for Johnny now was powerful and it was reinforced every time she looked at Lucia. Her beautiful little girl....her sick little baby girl...her baby....Emily sobbed, as she leaned against the wall outside the intensive care nursery....thinking: _My Lucia._

(My heart's crippled by the vein that you keep on closing.

You cut me open and I

keep bleeding

Keep, keep

bleeding love.

I keep bleeding.

keep, keep

bleeding love.

keep bleeding.

keep, keep bleeding

love.

You cut me open.)


	51. jason and alexis, seventeen

September 2010

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 17**

Emily was standing in the hallway, outside of the neonatal unit, being held by her brother, Jason, when Johnny came running down the hallway. Jason spotted him, stepped back from Emily, and she turned her tear stained face to look at her former lover.

Not boyfriend. Not fiancee. Johnny was only her lover of several months back when she was crazy, crazed, lost in pain and grief and anger, going by the name Rebecca because that bitch Helena had kidnaped and brainwashed her. Before she got her memory back, Johnny was perfect in her eyes.

But nothing felt right or sane or like it fit with him when she started to gain her memories back. She pushed hard at Johnny....told him to get away from her and go back to his own world...and he did.

He was there for her, as much as she let him be, and their daughter but he fell in love with someone else. A waitress named Jane. She was simple to love. She was sweet and uncomplicated. Not like Emily, who was all jagged pieces inside now. Only comfortable around her family, Liz, Nikolas, Gia, Sonny and Lucky. The people who knew her way back when.

She never thought she'd miss Johnny when she pushed him away. But she did. She missed when his eyes used to fill with hunger and heat for her. She missed how he would whisper in her ear "You're amazing," and how he used to think she was someone incredible.

Now he knew she wasn't amazing- she was a former princess turned hot mess. And she let their baby get sick.

Johnny asked, breathlessly, as his hand flattened against the glass of the N-icu and he started inside at his daughter. "How is she?"

Emily tried to hold back her sob when she said "Critical."

Jason stepped back even more, to give them privacy.

Johnny turned to look at Emily. "What did the doctors say? Can they save our girl?"

"They're trying."

He sucked in a huge shaky breath. His hand slowly rose and touched her arm. His eyes met and held on hers, both of their brown eyes tear filled. Then he pulled her into a hug. She hadn't been held by him since the day their child was born, and they all curled up together on Emily's hospital bed.

She gripped Johnny tightly now. She could live without him loving her again....maybe not happily but she could live...but she would die if they lost their baby girl.

Just die.

Johnny whispered into her ear "We're not losing our girl...I just won't let her go, you hear me?"

Emily nodded, then rested her head on his shoulder.

XXXXXXXXXXX

A few hours later Alexis walked down the hallway at General Hospital and saw Jason sitting in a chair, near the neo natal icu. He stood up when he spotted her. "Hey, you didn't have to come down here."

He had left a note by the bed for her, saying he didn't want to wake her up and he would call her later. Alexis showered, dressed and decided to come down to check on Emily herself. "How is Emily doing? How's Lucia?"

"Em and Johnny are in with her...I don't know how she is...the doctors gave her medication. We're just waiting to see if it works."

"You're here alone?"

"Emily didn't want the family here causing a lot of chaos. They're down in the waiting room with Alice under strict orders to not let any of them out."

Alexis touched Jason's arm. "Are you doing okay?"

"I'm just worried for Em."

"She's stronger now and Lucia was a healthy, full term, perfect baby at birth...she can beat this. We have to believe that."

"Thanks for coming down."

"Of course."

Alexis hesitated a moment, with her eyes locked on his, and then she hugged him. She felt his tense body relax underneath her touch. A man like Jason might look like he never needed anybody to comfort him, like he was a rock that others could lean on always, but the ones who knew him best knew better than that.

He needed to lean on others sometimes. And today Alexis was willing to let herself be the shoulder he rested his head on.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Hours later Emily was sitting in the chapel, all alone, with candles lit. She silently prayed for God to save her precious baby girl. She apologized for not wanting Lucia from the very first second she learned she was pregnant- and for all she did to hurt Johnny. She swore to make it right.

Emily never heard the person walk into the hospital chapel, and didn't notice him till he sat down next to her. Turning to look at him, her face crumbled into tears of relief.

"Hey, its gonna be okay."

She clutched him tightly. "Lucky.....she's so sick!"

"Shhhh. She's strong like her mama. You believe that, right?"

Emily would honestly believe anything Lucky ever told her.

XXXXXXXXXXX

It was nearly four in the afternoon when Damian Spinelli came running down the hallway at the hospital. "Stone Cold! Goddess Mother! The Jackal has arrived...sorry about the late hour but I could not leave the lake house until the dastardly D.A. and the sweet nurse showed up to relieve me of my Mini Goddess caring duties. The kids are fine, if you were wondering, and I do believe their illnesses will soon be eradicated....now how is The Littlest Princess?"

Alexis smiled at Spinelli. For all his exuberance he was a remarkable young man. "Liz told us a few minutes ago that Lucia's vitals are improving now."

"That is fine news!"

Alexis said "Thanks for staying with the girls last night. So Ric and Nadine were a little late getting over there this afternoon?"

"Just slightly. They said something about driving all night and all day due to an impromptu trip to The Buckeye State."

Jason asked "They went to Ohio last night?"

"It appears so and today The Sweet Nurse was sporting, what she said was, a newly purchased, blinding bright diamond on her ring finger. I fear she's being sucked further under the spell of The Dastardly D.A."

Alexis said "At least she's good for him. Lets just hope for Nadine's sake that Ric is good for her back."

Jason shook his head, wearily. Alexis knew what that look meant: The only good Ric is a dead Ric.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"I wish I could hold her," Johnny whispered to Emily, as they stood next to Lucia. She was inside of this tent that gave her oxygen to help with her uneasy breathing. "So I could comfort her."

"You are...you're here."

"I just feel so damn helpless!"

"Johnny...." she murmured.

"I know you always said you could raise her alone but I should be able to do something for my daughter. Make this right for her."

"That was a mistake. I can't raise her alone."

He jerked his head to the side to look in her eyes. He moved closer to her. "You're just scared. I should stop making it worse on you."

"I can't keep pushing you away. Its hurting Lucia and its killing me to keep up the lies."

His eyes widened. Those dark, brooding, pain filled eyes locked on hers. His breathing became shaky. "Lets talk more....when our baby is healthy, okay?"

"Okay."

He stared at her for a long moment.

Emily added "She has to make it. I'll die. I know I will. I'll die if we lose her."

He hugged her tightly. "There's no way I'd let either of you get away from me for good."

And that is when Emily knew, what her and Johnny created together could withstand anything. It was stronger that she ever gave it credit for. Johnny was stronger. More of man than she knew. He forgave everything...and he never tried to run away, even when she told him to turn his back and never look at her again.

Because she had been ashamed of who she was, and confused about who she would be. Until now. Now it was clear. She was Lucia's mom and she wanted to give herself permission to have faith again...for Lucia's sake and her own....and for Johnny, the guy who she hurt more than she ever hurt anyone.

She was grateful that Johnny wasn't the type to hold that against her for life.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Once Lucia started to make a turn for the better, after a long day at the hospital, Jason walked Alexis to the parking lot so she could go home and check on her own sick daughters. Jason and Alexis had been surrounded by people all day- though it could have been worse...it could have been Nikolas, Sam and Matt, all people in the dark about the fact Jason and Alexis were dating.

Nikolas was in Russia on business. Sam and Matt had another week left on their honeymoon.

Jason hadn't expected Alexis to show up at General Hospital but he was glad she took it upon herself to do that. It was rare for him to lean on anyone- but Carly- still it felt right to have Alexis there by his side. She was strong enough to weather any storm. She proved that over the years. Jason didn't have to worry she would break if he leaned on her.

It wasn't that he cried and she wiped away his tears. It was just that she was there. There. When she didn't have to be. She wanted to be...for him. She wanted to be there when it wasn't sexy or fun or exciting. When it was messy and painful, scary and sad.

Today showed Jason that Alexis wanted something real. Like he already knew he wanted.

They reached her car. Jason had Milo bring it by for Alexis, since Jason drove the night before and Alexis had to take a cab to the hospital earlier.

Jason said "Hope the girls are feeling better by now."

"They're almost completely through this latest bout of strep. Thank God cause I can't take much more of two cranky fussy kids fighting with each other. The last time I called though they sounded pretty good. If the doctor clears them Monday then they will head back to school the next day. They seemed to do fine without me last night. Of course, Spinelli is like a miracle worker with them."

"The boys always love when Spinelli stops by Carly's house too."

"He'll be a great dad one day."

"Yeah, one day." Jason said, his voice warning that it needed not to be anytime soon.

She smiled. "I'm not advocating Maxie get pregnant. I'm not for babies having babies. Although I did that myself. But that's why I know its so hard to deal with at a young age."

"I was just about their age when Michael was born."

"I remember."

He shook his head. "I didn't know what the hell I was doing. And now I look at Emily with Lucia. She's going through so much. I want to make it okay for her again."

"She knows you would if you could. That's the best you can do for her, Jason. Just be there when she needs you. You're good at that. Ask Carly! She's given you a second job of being her rock. Or maybe that is your first job. You just moonlight in the mafia."

He gave her a slight smile in response to her joke. "Carly stopped over this morning."

Alexis eyes widened. "Was she carrying a hose?"

Alexis had mentioned before how Carly sprayed her with water, drenching her, a few years back and she knew that it was no accident. Carly liked it way too much.

Jason chuckled. "She just wanted to see what was up."

"I'm surprised I slept through the screeching when she realized I was there. Or didn't she catch on?"

"She knew. She's.....going to be fine with it."

"Going to be,"Alexis smiled and joked "I'll keep dressing in waterproof clothing for a while longer anyway." Their eyes held and the tension increased. "Well...I better get home now."

She unlocked her car and then turned to face him again, saying, "Last night was lovely. Just one little suggestion for you: Buy wine! Merlot!"

"Okay."

She murmured "Good by then."

Alexis turned to get into the car, but Jason took hold of her hand and pulled her back around to face him, tugging her flush with his body. Her breathing quickened. His mouth descended on hers. Did she really think she was going home without him getting his lips on hers another time?


	52. jason and alexis, eighteen

_**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**_

_**September 2010**_

_**Instant Addiction**_

_**Part 18**_

_Mature_

Alexis wasn't even sure she should expect a good bye kiss from Jason. They only had one date. Were they really at the kissing hello and good-bye stage already?

Not that she didn't want to be at that stage. Of course she did. She wasn't looking to rush into anything...not at all, in fact it would be smartest to stall things till Sam returned...but she wanted to be at the hello and good bye kiss phase because it meant one simple thing: more chances to get Jason's lips on hers.

Every time his lips were against hers she felt more alive than she had in years. His mouth could do things to her that should be outlawed in all fifty states. It was way too dangerous and erotic to be legal.

He pushed her against her car, in the General Hospital parking lot, and their simple parting kiss turned intense, as he slid his tongue over her lips until she wound her arms around his neck and opened her mouth for him.

The rough leather of his jacket rubbed against her silky top, sending sparks shooting through her nipples, as he pressed one leg between her thighs. She doubted he meant to take the kiss this far in public. She'd never seen him behave like this before with anyone else. He liked to remain stoic and aloof, as much as he could manage. Not get caught making out in a parking garage by strangers.

But who could stop when it felt so freaking fantastic?

She longed to be a very rational woman. Sex in public places was bad, bad, bad. Illegal even. Sex with Jason anywhere was good, good, good. What a quandary.

He grabbed her hips and ground against her. Ripping his mouth off hers he looked down at her with lust laden eyes "Give me an hour."

"Jason..."

He stepped back, running his hands through his hair, trying to get his breathing back under control. "You're right. You better get home."

"I was going to say....I'm sure Ric can handle the girls for a couple more hours at least. As long as Emily is okay here without you."

He walked around her car, to climb in the passenger seat. "She's laying down now. Trying to get some sleep."

They both climbed into the car and immediately started kissing again. Alexis gripped his head, moaning into his mouth desperately, as she practically crawled into his lap. Neither one ever held back with the other when it came to sex. That would defeat the point.

They enjoyed each other because it made them feel free. Not like they had to pretend it didn't feel good or wasn't important. It did. It was.

Jason started to kiss down her neck. Pushing aside her shirt, he kissed her shoulder. Her hand slid down his chest and then over the front of his pants, causing him to let out a low, frustrated groan. "Start the car.....lets get out of here."

She didn't have to be told twice. Shaking with hunger, Alexis grabbed her keys, took in and out some shallow breathes, flashed him a sexy smile and then started her Mercedes.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason was hard as hell by the time they were in the elevator at Harborview Towers. He started kissing the back of Alexis' neck, letting his hands rub over her stomach and then up to her breasts, as he stood behind her.

She titled her head so that he could lean down and kiss her. Their tongues danced together as she got more and more breathless. Just like he liked her.

All flushed and crazy over him. Willing to do anything. Hot damn. He really could get used to this. Her. Them.

They worked together.

The doors slid open and there stood Maxie. "OH!"

Jason grabbed Alexis hand, as she tried to straighten her clothes, and pulled her toward his Penthouse. "Hey, Maxie."

"Oh, hi! I wanted to talk to you about my birthday next month. I wanted to take a trip with everyone...use your jet...maybe Vegas or Barbados...I haven't decided but it will be fun. Promise!"

Jason unlocked his door.

Alexis said, as she half hid behind Jason, "That sounds lovely."

"Really? Great! Spinelli will be so excited that you both can make it. And Kristina and Molly too. Will it be an issue if Sam is there? Would that get...weird? I mean she is insane over Matt....but still..this...uh... I think we can make it work, though, right? Right! Positive thinking like Spinelli always says. So you're both confirmed then?"

Jason said "Later, Maxie. Later, okay?"

"Well....okay! Sure! Later then. Bye!"

The door closed.

She called out "Hope you like that couch! It was expensive but so worth it, right?"

Jason pushed Alexis against the door of his Penthouse, praying Maxie would give up and go away. What had she been babbling about? He had to go to Vegas next month? What? Who took kids to Vegas? He didn't even want to know what that was about right now.

What he wanted was to kiss Alexis till she was moaning his name. Hot, wet, ready, eager, so turned on that she went wild beneath him. Yeah, that's all Jason wanted right now.

The day had been stressful, worrying about his sister and niece, but right now was just what he needed to let that stress go.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis felt like she was on fire. Every inch of her skin was burning, aching to be quenched, quivering with anticipation of his touch, his kiss, his mouth, his hands.

This could not go fast enough for her.

She pushed off his leather jacket, as Jason shrugged out of it and let it hit the floor behind them. Alexis ripped frantically at his shirt. He yanked it off. She started kissing his chest, flicking at his nipples, undoing his pants, all at the same time. He groaned in pleasure but moved back. Dropping to his knees he unzipped her boots and slipped them off her feet. She stepped out of them. Jason pushed them aside and then stood up. He helped her out of her coat and shirt.

His eyes feasted on her lace clad breasts. He licked at his lips.

Picking up Alexis he kept her back on the door, as she wound her legs around him. Their mouths found each other in a torrid, desperate kiss. Her fingernails dug into his shoulders. He moved down to kiss a trail over her chest, then covered her left breast with his mouth, sucking at her nipple through the fabric of her bra.

She moaned deeply, feeling that moan right through to the center of her.

He pushed up her bra and licked, sucked and feasted on her breasts until she was begging for release. "Please...please...Jason....I need you right now!"

As soon as those words flew out of her mouth Jason carried her over to the couch, resting her ass on the back of it, his hands moved to undo the button on her jeans. She slid out of them, standing up on shaking legs, and also pushed off her black lace panties.

Completely naked Alexis went to work on getting Jason to the same state. They kept kissing as he got out of his shoes, jeans, socks and boxers. With their mouths joined together they walked around the couch. She broke the kiss and took him into her hands, stroking him till he was thick, hard and ready. Her eyes fluttered up to meet his, letting him decide what position they'd try this time.

He turned her away from the couch and then sat down, leading her down onto the hard length of him. Alexis moaned over and over, letting out a stream of curse words, as she felt him fill her. As soon as they fell into a rhythm she was whimpering at how good it was, with his one hand roughly working her right breast, tweaking, squeezing, twisting her nipple.

She knew he was getting close, minutes later, when Jason started to cry out her name over and over in this guttural, intense way while speeding up their pace by grabbing her hips. She let her own hand slide to her clit and rubbed at it furiously until her body clenched his, stars sprung behind her eyes and she let out a scream so loud that Maxie, across the hall, probably was rushing to find earplugs to drown Alexis out.

Jason grunted "So fucking good."

"Mmm hmmm," was all Alexis had the energy to say back.


	53. jason and alexis, nineteen

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

Note- this chapter was written while listening to the song Must Be Nice by Lyfe Jennings.

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 19**

**Mature**

Patrick Drake never thought he'd be friends with a bunch of gangsters. But this was his life now. Not only was his ex-wife, Robin Scorpio, like a little sister to Sonny Corinthos, the woman he loved with all his heart now, Elizabeth, had a child with Jason Morgan and her best friend, Emily, had a baby with John Zacchara.

Patrick called it the price of doing business- and making a life- in Port Charles.

He tried to look at these men as men not as killing machines and not as selfish pricks, as he had once thought of all of them. Today Johnny was not a mobster in Patrick's eyes he was just a man who had a sick baby in the hospital.

Patrick walked up to John, as he stood staring through the window that peeked into the ICU, and placed his hand on the younger man's shoulder. "How are you doing?"

"Is Lucia in pain?"

"She's on pain meds. Her chart says her vitals are much stronger now than earlier today. She's still got a fight ahead of her but she's in stable condition. You have a tough little girl there."

"That's all Emily," his voice was haunted with worry and grief.

"I know this is really frightening for you. Its one thing when we get hurt, we're grown ups, but when its our babies...."

"Its not fair. I try not to think about how close we came to losing her. I got to keep convinced she turned the corner now."

"When Emma had pneumonia what I did was picture her five years in the future, starting kindergarten, happy and healthy. I kept that in my mind. Believed she'd make it to that day. Try and do that for Lucia. Imagine her and Emma dancing around the living room six years from now, trying to sing just like some pop star on TV. Just believe that day will come. You're a father. You can't give in to the fear."

"I know. I have to be strong for Em and Luce."

"Have you called your sister?"

"I don't want to worry her. I'll call when we take Luce home."

"Call Claudia now, John. I'd want Matt to call me if he was in your place."

John nodded. His eyes never moved away from watching his daughter.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason pulled back on his boxer shorts. He threw Alexis his t-shirt, which she slipped on. Sitting next to her on the couch, he stared at her for a long moment. She was flushed, her hair was mussed and sexy as all hell, and her eyes still shone with leftover heat from their encounter.

Her breathing was shallow and ragged. Something he found hot as fire to hear. He knew he had to get her home to her kids but not in this shape she was right now. "Shower?"

"Together, did you mean? Or would I like one? Because, yes, I would like one, Jason. Thank you."

"Together."

"I could be persuaded."

A small grin curved his lips as he gave her a short nod, reached out and grabbed her hand and pulled her upstairs. Once they were in the bathroom, he started the shower and turned to look at her, admiring her like he always did these days, with a deep appreciation of who she was, on her own, and what she brought to his life.

He said "Thanks...for the date."

She smiled slightly. "You like me now," her voice was low and sensual "but what about next week when we're having our business meeting about the federal investigation and I tell you that you better do everything I say and just how I say it if you expect to avoid a lengthy prison sentence?" Her voice teased him "Will you like me then, Jason?"

"That's business," he said, in a low and demanding tone. He pulled off her t-shirt. "I don't talk business in my bathroom." He pressed her against the counter, rubbing erotically against her, and kissing her neck, as she encircled his neck with her arms.

Jason never saw this coming...enjoying being with Alexis this much...finding it easy to make work. He'd done hard so many times- and he never minded. Those women, those experiences, the memories made it all worth it...but falling into something easy....it dislodged some long held pain that had rested on his chest for years.

Give her up? No fucking way. He was a man who was sick of giving up everyone he wanted to keep close. This time he wasn't giving up jack shit.

XXXXXXXXXXX

It felt too good to worry right now about all the things Alexis knew she had to worry about. The fact that Sam would be home in a week. The danger of being with a mobster- again. (Damn...that danger loving gene she had really got her into some crazy situations sometimes.) And the fact that everything could go wrong tomorrow...that living in Port Charles just about guaranteed that it would all turn into a mess sooner rather than later.

Her mind could go wild with rambling thoughts about all that but when Jason was kissing her neck she was lost in sensations and her worries would have to wait. His mouth did things to her, made her forget the world for a while, and made her want to find some way to keep getting his mouth on some part of her body everyday.

Alexis was far from a silly school girl. She was not getting lost in romantic fantasies about spending her life with Jason. She just wanted what they had today to still feel this amazing tomorrow.

Day by day, they'd see what happened. As for today, she was glad she had Jason interested in her, because he bringing her heart back to life- after years of that heart only loving her family, her best friend, Jax, and also a man who got married way too often, but never to her. She hadn't let that heart love Ric fully-in a deep, soul changing way- and she never risked it at all on Jerry or Cruz or Raynor or anyone else who said she was beautiful, intelligent and lethal.

Alexis had been sure she wouldn't open her heart again but it was undeniable that Jason was sneaking into her heart.

Just a little.

It was easier to fall in love with a man who was already a friend. She wondered, back when she was on the balcony, why she hadn't remembered that little fact? Yes, it was so much easier when he was already someone that was trusted and someone who knew her history.

This was like slipping into a warm bath, familiar and comforting, while at the same time it was like standing in a very hot, steamy shower- intense and deliciously sinful.

Jason lifted her up to sit on the counter, letting his tongue slip into the heat of her mouth. Using his own leg he pushed her legs further apart, as his hand slid slowly over her thigh and then caressed her wetness.

He behaved as if he could never get enough of her. And maybe he couldn't. Maybe he would never have his fill. Right now that was looking just fine with her.

Alexis slipped her hand inside of his boxers, wrapping her fingers around his cock, causing Jason to moan and jerk his mouth off hers. "Shower."

She smiled and slid away from him, climbing under the stream of water. A moment later, stripped of his shorts, Jason was in there too, picking up a bottle of body wash and squirting it just above her breasts. Setting it down he went to work on rubbing it in, massaging her breasts and nipples, making her moan softly at the feel of his calloused, dangerous hands on her smooth tender flesh.

Alexis leaned against the cool tile wall. Jason took both her hands and held them over her head, with one of his hands, as the other gripped his cock and teased her entrance. She wrapped one leg around his back.

He grunted "Its feels so damn good inside of you, Alexis, do you know that?"

She jerked beneath him as he ran over the length of her, then slipped just a little inside. Her voice was soft and demanding when she said "Make me scream."

Jason slammed all the way into her. She arched her back, brushing her nipples against his chest, as sparks flew through her body. He started thrusting at a rapid pace right away. Sending her right to the edge of an orgasm in no time flat. Her whole body throbbed as she left out desperate whimpers.

Soon she was repeating "Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK, FUCK! OHHHHHH!"

"That's right. That's good. Come on," he thrust harder, as her back hit the wall over and over, "scream for me. Scream...uhhhhh."

"Oh, God!" She bit his shoulder.

He let go of the hands over her head. She gripped his shoulders tightly. His hand slipped between their bodies and rubbed her clit. Her walls clenched and she exploded into a mind blurring orgasm.

"JASON!"

He thrust quickly several more times and then came. A second orgasm wracked Alexis, causing her to be so lost in sensations that she couldn't even scream another time.


	54. jason and alexis, twenty

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 20**

She watched him as she dialed her phone, then turned away to concentrate on her call.

Cell phone in hand, he turned and looked at her, as she made her call while dragging on her boots at the same time.

Jason checked in with Robin, asking about his niece Lucia, who was still in stable and improving condition. Emily was exhausted and asleep in the on call room. Alexis checked on her daughters, promising to bring home ice cream since they had been good for Spinelli, Ric and Nadine. She could tell the kids were doing much better, as they had been getting better each day and now were back to full screaming and running around shape.

When they both hung up, she asked "Do you want a ride back to the hospital?"

"No. I can take my bike."

She nodded and stood up. "Well, this was a good first date. Though I seem to have lost my purse and coat somewhere. A hazard of being too caught up in the moment, I guess."

"They're still on the floor downstairs, by the door."

"Oh, right."

Their eyes met and held. There was something about the way that Jason looked at Alexis now that set her skin on fire with the slightest glance. It was as if he had claimed her body as his playground.

She broke eye contact- knowing she needed to get out of this bedroom or else she wouldn't be leaving at all for days. He said, in a determined voice as if he was forcing himself to say it, "Lets go."

Placing his hand on the small of her back, he led her downstairs. They gathered up her things. He picked up his jeans and t-shirt that he had on earlier and tossed them on the back of the chair, then retrieved his leather jacket from the floor.

Jason asked "What was Maxie saying? Vegas?"

"I think I agreed that we're going there with her next month. But who knows if I have court. I'll have to check my calendar. And it all depends on Sam, too, I suppose. This all...depends on Sam, really."

Jason nodded. "Kids in Vegas? Do people do that?"

"I think they do, actually. Though I don't."

"A vacation with Maxie. I think I have a mafia summit that weekend."

Alexis busted out laughing. She knew Jason had to be in a really good mood to crack a joke. She'd never seen him in such a good mood before....she was seeing a side of him than she never even knew existed. It was like being let into a secret world.

XXXXXXXXXX

Her laugh reminded him of the night on the balcony. He rarely made jokes. Really only Carly heard his sense of humor sneak out from time to time now. Sometimes, in the past, Sam had too. It took a real level of comfort to go there for him. Walls falling, which he rarely let happen with people.

Alexis said "You should joke more often."

Jason just shook his head and pulled open the door. "I'm gonna ask Spinelli what in the hell this vacation is all about. Why Maxie would think it's a good idea."

Alexis pressed the button for the elevator. "Well, I suppose, the object is fun."

He shook his head again, as if the idea was out of the realm of possibility.

"Or," Alexis went on, as the elevator doors opened, "it could be a vacation wedding."

Spinelli gasped and stumbled out of the elevator. "How, if I may inquire, did you deduce the true nature of our trip to celebrate the orgins of Maximista's birth? Did she reveal our hidden agenda?"

Alexis' eyes widen.

Jason asked "You asked her to marry you?"

"The Jackal would have come to you for counsel but it all happened in a whirlwind, without forethought, and then after we had decided we wanted to spare ourselves any drama like the weddings of Mr. Sir and The Fashionita, and just invite our closest love ones to a destination celebration that would be a clandestine affair."

Alexis cried "Spinelli, congratulations! Wow! A husband...and Maxie, your wife...wow." She hugged him.

Jason added "Congratulations, man."

Spinelli asked "So you will both attend my nuptials? Because it would not be the same without either of you there to wish us well in our new endeavor."

"I'll be there," Jason said.

"I'll do my best, Spinelli. I'll let you know. I'm very happy for you and Maxie both, though. Truly happy. I can only imagine how excited she is to look for a dress."

"The Blonde One is already complaining about the blisters on her feet from being dragged from boutique to boutique."

After another hug between Alexis and Spinelli, they all said good bye. Jason and Alexis got on the elevator, the doors closed. They looked at each other.

"Married?" Alexis asked.

"That's what he said."

"Just checking."

"It...it will be fine," Jason said."Right?"

"Right!"

"She makes him happy."

"And just because they are young and involved in drama every other week....well...half of all marriages don't end in divorce. So why can't Spinelli and Maxie be in that half?"

"Right."

"I'll believe it if you do," Alexis said."

"Deal."

XXXXXXXXXX

For Jason it was not real- when he was with another woman- until he faced Carly and let her know about it. He could really put that off for a long time- working excuses and justifications like Carly worked her plans.

For Alexis it was not real with a man until she was looking into nearly black eyes and hearing what he thought about the whole thing. He rarely- okay, never- had thought anything good so far.

She ended up at Greystone on Wednesday for one of her cooking lessons. Sonny had emailed her that Gia was working late at her advertising agency and Gia said it would be a good time for Sonny to teach Alexis how to make the sauce that goes over the al dente noodles she now could pull off.

Gia.

Alexis could hardly still believe that the girl who once crushed on Zander and wanted to marry Nikolas- his Princess Sparky before there was an ex-Princess Emily- was now a grown woman who made Sonny happy, and didn't have fits of rage or tantrums over Alexis, Carly, or Lois coming by.

Gia wasn't much of a fan of Kate's. But most people weren't. And they all universally hated Claudia.

There was a time when Alexis would not have been able to hang out with Sonny like this. She would have wanted more than just friendship and because she felt he wouldn't- or couldn't anymore- give that to her, she would have kept her distance from him. That all changed when they found out Claudia ordered a hit on Sonny and Michael was shot instead.

Suddenly Sonny needed her. And he needed her so much and so desperately that she could no longer let her fear and pain keep her across town. During that time, the year before, they found their way to a new sort of relationship. It wasn't all she ever wanted. But it was all they had now- and it was pretty fabulous on most days.

But they still had their bad moments, too. Their 'how dare you, that's just like you, you always do that' moments.

As she walked into his living room, and he stood up to greet her, she said "Please tell me this sauce you're going to teach me to make does not have more than five steps in the recipe. Because I've decided that five steps is really my culinary limit. They should have a cookbook for people like me. Cook Your Way Gourmet in Five Easy- Fireproof- Steps, don't you think?"

A grin curved his lips. He kissed her cheek. "You're not starting a fire in my kitchen."

"God forbid," she joked. "Would you ever forgive me for destroying all those expensive pots and pans you own? I think that might be your breaking point with me."

His eyes settled into hers and held. A moment passed. "How you doing?"

She knew what that meant: how is Jason treating you? "I'm well. Better then well. Happy. So are you ready to start this cooking tutorial? The girls are thrilled that I may finally be able to make them a meal that didn't start off frozen."

"You want a drink first?"

"Sonny-"

"Have a drink, Alexis." He was already walking away to make it.

She sat down on the couch, crossing her legs, and watched him until he came back. He handed her the drink and sat down on the other end of the couch.

Sonny said "Look, I get you don't want to go there-"

"But we're going there anyway, right?"

"Its like this-"

"We're going there," she said, then sipped her drink.

"Its like this," he repeated "I know Jason better than you. I know how he is."

With a slight edge to her voice she asked "And how is he, Sonny?"

"I know how he thinks. And I get that this isn't a decade back, okay? I got that. But this thing between you and him has got me-"

"I just can't believe you are doing this to me."

"Its got me worried, okay? Concerned."

"Oh, you're concerned," she said in a mocking tone.

He nodded, his eyes widening, as he tried to drive home his point. "Yeah, I'm concerned. Hear me out. Cause you don't want to end up six months in and then look up and see you're second. I just want you to know what you're getting into. I know I should shut up about this-"

"Very astute deduction. Shutting up would work fine right about now."

He just shook his head, in the way that said she understood all he was saying but she wouldn't admit it and that frustrated him. "I want you to be first. Sorry. But I do, okay? Take that however you want. I ain't saying to not do this thing with Jason...that's your business...I'm just saying don't expect to be first with him."

"I expected to be first with you."

There it was. After years, there it was. She was older now and she was stronger and she was ready to face this. Probably because she knew he loved Gia too much to lean over and kiss Alexis. There was so much on the line that she couldn't breath.

Sonny's gaze sharpened. He stared at her for a long moment. "I messed up."

Tears came to her eyes and she looked away. She hated crying. Cassadines shouldn't cry ever, let alone in front of others. "If you know that now, then why are you trying to take this away from me?"

"Look, that's not what I'm doing here-"

Her head snapped back around. "Then what are you doing, Sonny?!"

The gaurd came into the room. His name was Gino, and he was another gaurd-Niko's- little brother. Gino was young, dark haired, and very laid back. But he was raised that nobody- but nobody- hurt a woman. Not even the boss. "Ms. Davis?"

Sonny told him "Get out of here!"

Alexis said "I'm fine, Gino. Thank you."

When the gaurd was gone, and the door was closed, Sonny stood up and shoved his hands in his pocket. "You're pissed. I get that. I had to say it though."

"You had to? You just had to. Of course you did."

"Just be careful with Jason. Be smart. If he's good to you, good. But be cautious, okay?"

She stood up. "Did you ever, for one second, think that bringing up Carly would give me flashbacks to when you did just what you're standing here and swearing on a stack of bibles Jason is bound to do to me? Regardless of the fact that Carly is, in fact, presently happily, or so they tell me, married to my best friend. Did you think that, Sonny, or did you just not care?"

"I can't take you being mad at me."

She sighed. "I'm not angry."

"You're so pissed that steam is coming out of your ears."

"Fine! I'm pissed. I just came here to make sauce. You said nothing in your e-mail about giving me dire warnings of impending doom."

"Believe it or not, I want you and him to work out."

"Not."

"What? I do. I want you happy."

"I know that. But only on your terms. Well, Sonny, the world in general, outside those doors over there, does not run on your terms. I do not run my life or my romantic relationships on your terms. Thank you for caring. But I'm well aware of who Carly is to Jason. Who do you think Jax is to me? But I can love someone else...and I have. You're the one who married her, what was it, twenty nine times? Not Jason. I think he can resist her. And if he can't, well then, I will handle it. Like the big girl I am. Like I handled losing you."

"You won't handle it alone, okay? I got your back."

"You are so maddening."

"Yeah."

She sucked in a shaky breath. "Are we making puttanesca sauce today or not? I came here to make sauce."

He kissed her cheek again. "We're making sauce. Come on, counselor." He headed for the kitchen.

She wondered why he was so good at telling her why Ned, Ric, Jerry and Jason were all wrong for her but he could never tell her why he didn't find a way to keep them together. Then he wouldn't have to worry about her being second to Carly ever again.

But he hadn't. So he worried. And she loved him for worrying- and for many other reasons. One of which was at school that afternoon playing her flute and talking by her locker to her first crush, and doing it all with her Daddy's eyes staring out at the world. Alexis might get ticked at Sonny and think he was way out of line and just plain wrong, but she couldn't hate him and she wouldn't run away again.

He was giving her cooking lessons now. She was invested in learning how to make a whole meal. So she was kinda stuck putting up with him for the time being.

Note- Gino DeMarco is a new original character of mine. He will be in Lean On Me. Look for him in a Spixie scene, if you read that fic.

Gino is twenty three years old in this fic. He has black hair, green eyes and a relaxed personality.


	55. jason and alexis, twenty one

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 21**

**Mature**

Jason and Alexis decided to ditch work and steal some time together at her place during the afternoon on Thursday- knowing Sam would be back the next day. Alexis was waiting in her bedroom for him. She'd told the gaurd on the deck to tell Jason to just come in.

Alexis had gone on a shopping trip with Diane to buy some lingerie that would show Jason she was the hottest MILF in New York. Though the term MILF was more Diane's terminology than her own. Still she wanted him to think of her like that. Hotter than any other soccer mom in town.

She wore this bustier that had lace strings in the back with lacy black panties and thigh highs.

"Alexis,' she heard him call out her name as his heavy boots pounded against her wooden floors.

Just hearing him coming down the hall got her juices flowing- even more than they already were since her own fingers had slid into her panties as she sat there waiting for him. Just hearing Jason in the hall told her body that soon he would be filling her to the hilt, driving against the spongy spot he found every time, making her eyes roll back in her head and her toes curl.

Her body knew instinctively by the sound of him getting closer to her that she was about to get throughly- and deliciously- fucked.

He found her sitting on the edge of the bed, facing the door, with her legs spread slightly and her heels resting on the floor. He stopped right inside the door. His eyes devoured her whole. She noticed he had already shed his leather jacket somewhere between the door and her bedroom.

Jason ground out, as he took in the sight of her, with her hair all flowing over her shoulders and her lips moistened and wet, "Damn."

"Its not polite to stare- and its not nice to wear so many clothes when I'm nearly naked."

He stalked over to her, not saying a word, and his hand slid between her thighs, under the edge of the lace that covered her and against her center. His fingers smoothed over a puddle of wetness. "You're dripping."

"For you, Jason. You're late. Its 1:50. We said 1:45."

"Traffic," he said, shortly, as his mouth came down to connect with hers. A low growl escaped the back of his throat as he pushed her onto the bed, following her down, then rolling over and pulled her on top of him. His hands cupped her ass. "You're messing up my business, Alexis."

She brushed her lips against his, sensually, and whispered "If you want to stay out of prison you'll do what I say to the letter."

"Not that." Jason slipped his hands beneath her panties again. Teasing her with soft strokes.

Alexis sucked on his bottom lip. "How....then?"

He rolled her over again, his hand staying on her center as he did, and then sinking into her once she was on her back. "This."

She arched against him. "This? This is good. Not bad. Good....oh!"

"This is all I think about all day." He slipped another finger inside of her. "How good you feel."

As she withered beneath his thrusting fingers she warned "Don't think too much....its dangerous."

For a few minutes he fingered her while kissing her mouth, neck and shoulders.

Jason brushed his thumb against her clit, with enough pressure to make her start moaning "Oh! Oh! OH! OHHHHHH." She was breathing heavily, when his mouth came down and fastened on one of her nipples, through her lingerie. He sped up his pace with his fingers. "Yes! Oh, fuck, yes, JASON! JASON! JASON!"

His lips covered hers and she shuddered to an orgasm moaning into his mouth. When she finally lay still he slipped his fingers out of her then kissed the pulse point on her neck before rolling onto his back.

Alexis kept breathing erratically for a couple more minutes. When she caught her breath she said "No one took a shot at you today, did they?"

He looked at her. "No."

"That's good to hear. Dating mobsters....very worrisome stuff."

Jason lifted a hand and caressed her cheek, kissing her softly. "I'll be all right."

"But you said-"

"I'll deal with it."

"I think about you when I'm in court and sometimes I wonder if I lose my license for providing ineffective counsel."

"Yeah?"

"I always get my head back in the game quickly though. Its just those brief flashes that get me."

He nodded, then sat up and stripped off his shirt. Bending over, while she watched the muscles in his back ripple, he took off his shoes and socks. In one fluid motion he lifted Alexis up and deposited her onto his jean clad lap.

She straddled him, resting her head on his shoulder.

Jason asked, as he undid the back of her bustier, "This new?"

"Bought expressly for you."

"Thanks."

"Did it do its job?"

"Worth every penny."

He reached down and undid the straps that connected to her thigh highs and then slipped the bustier off, revealing her plump, creamy breasts to him. The way he looked at them...the way he cupped them both and licked slowly across them....was filled with something closer to love than lust.

She didn't want to think too hard about that. She just wanted to enjoy Jason suckling at her tits like a man starving. And maybe he had been before her. Starving to feel alive again. Feel invested in someone. To get this kind of connection back again. She had been starving for that for sure.

Her hands smoothed up and down his back, as her head dipped backwards, while he licked at her nipples. She whimpered "So good. So good."

And it was. He always made sure she came over and over. And in between he made every delicious moment heavenly for her.

He swirled his tongue around her nipple. She brought her hands up to hold his head, tugging gently at his hair. He flipped her onto her back and ripped off her underwear. His mouth fastened onto her clit before she even had time to take another full breath in. She bucked upwards, screaming in pleasure. "OHHHHHHH! God! Yes...yes...just like that, Jason. Don't slow down." His tongue was now swirling over this pleasure center.

Jason reached out, and yanked open a drawer on the night stand, he pulled out a vibrator and turned it on. He knew it was there because she had left it out the last time he was over- on purpose. Nearly every day they made love and they never once backed off showing each other what they liked.

He eased it against her, as he licked at her clit and then he eased it inside of her, cranking up the speed.

"FUCK! Oh, you're making me come. Oh God! GOD! Jason! Yes!.......oh, oh, oh."

Her head thrashed on the pillow. Her hands grabbed her own breasts and squeezed.

The idea of him being so into pleasing her got her even hotter than usual and she found herself rolling through two consecutive orgasms. He took his mouth away but kept thrusting into her with the vibrator, and watched her pulling and massaging her own breasts. After she came down from the high, she watched him watching her. She twisted her nipples as Jason lifted one leg and pushed it up toward her chest, changing the angle, and soon she was getting close to another orgasm.

"Jason," she whimpered "fuck me...let go for me and fuck me right now."

She took over working the vibrator. She was so sensitive that every touch was driving her close to coming again. He shrugged out of his jeans and boxers and then pulled her to the edge of the bed. She tossed the vibrator aside and took hold of him, leading him into her.

He held her beneath her thighs and thrust into her with quick, hard, completely filling strokes. "Unhhh..." he moaned "fuck, yeah. That's what I like, Alexis."

She looked up at him. This Greek god of a man. He was more than just hot sex to her. He was someone she knew and trusted and enjoyed spending time with. And he respected her and her job and the fact she was a devoted mom. That made it all mean so much more.

Alexis could feel him hitting her g-spot with every thrust. She let out soft, breathless moans. "Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh."

He kept thrusting, as if he could go all day, and she bet he could. But she was already just about there again. "Slower...." she breathed out.

She wanted this to last. Because tomorrow they might be over.

He slowed his pace. Their eyes met and held. He pulled completely out and crawled onto the bed. He settled her back against the pillows and slid into her, missionary style. He started kissing her as he slowly stroked into her. Jason whispered "You're beautiful to me," and then immediately kissed her again.

They kept going for long minutes, slowly so that they could prolong the pleasure, until she finally threw her head back and moaned "Come with me."

He sped up his strokes, grunting and moaning as his did. She could feel him getting closer and closer to coming.

Alexis urged him on with her words, as she watched his face contort "Just like that. God, you feel amazing, Jason.....the best."

At those words he stroked quickly into her twice more and came. "Alexis.....uhhhhh. Fuck!"

The warm wetness he spilled into her made her feel whole.

He slid out of her and lay down. She closed her eyes again.

Jason said "I'm not giving you up."

She whispered, still with her eyes closed, "We'll see."

Tomorrow Sam would be back from her honeymoon.


	56. jason and alexis, twenty two

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 22**

Jason and Alexis lazed around the lake house that Thursday afternoon after they made love. They slept for a little while, then showered, got dressed and then went out to walk around the lake, as they waited for Viola to bring the girls home from their after school activities.

They ended up standing on the pier with his arms wrapped around her waist from behind, silently staring out at the water.

I'm not giving you up, his words repeated over and over in her mind. Had any man ever said that to her before? Those exact words? Stavros had once said "I'll never let you be free of me," his cold and sinister words chilling her to her bones. He thought he was making her weak with his threats but he only made her stronger. Strong enough to outlast him. Now more than twenty five years after her brother's scars had been borne on her soul, here came along Jason saying he wouldn't let her go either. But, when it came from him, it was something beautiful.

And still Alexis knew it might all be a moot point. Because her daughter- her beautiful first baby girl- had to come first. If Sam couldn't deal with this then Alexis would have to push Jason away.

He knew that. But, in his own stoic way, he was raging against it. Every kiss was a way to brand her. Make her see he wasn't somebody to walk out on. It made her fall a little more for him to know he really wanted to keep her in his life that bad.

To say it aloud- this man who didn't spare a lot of words. To show it with his every caress- this man who could have his choice of women in his bed. To hold her in the late afternoon sun in front of all the gaurds- and just not give a fuck what anyone thought.

Jason awed Alexis. She never thought, before their first kiss, he ever could. She hadn't known the depths of him. She saw his love from a distance- for his sister and his best friend and his mentor, and his boys, his Spinelli. But it was a whole different thing to live it up close.

She didn't want this to be over so quick. Still a part of her was preparing for that. Closing off sections of her heart so it wouldn't hurt as much should Sam disapprove tomorrow.

Diane would say that Sam was a big girl and she could deal. But Alexis was a Mom. She didn't want Sam to bear the burden of pain. That was her job.

Jason asked her, his words stiff with the weight of what they were facing, "You want me to make dinner tonight?"

"We could just order in. You spoil my girls with your meals. They'll think I can do that when you aren't around."

"I think they pretty much get you can't cook by now."

She chuckled. "I'm learning." A long moment passed before she said "I fought with Sonny yesterday."

Jason tensed.

Alexis went on "He worries."

"I never got in his way. He needs to stay out of ours."

"His heart is in the right place but the stuff that comes out of his mouth sometimes. Blunt isn't the word for it. More like brutal."

"I'll talk to him," Jason said, through clenched teeth.

"Don't. If I have problems with Sonny, I talk to him myself. You aren't a go-between. And I don't have problems with him right now. We worked it out. I had my cooking lesson. The peace is holding for now."

"Let me know if that changes. I don't want him upsetting you."

She turned around in his arms and looked into his eyes, while wrapping her arms around his lower back. "I wanted to tell you....I really enjoyed this. Our time together. I needed it."

"Today?" he asked but she knew he heard what she really meant.

"All of it, Jason."

After a minute he admitted "I never would have kissed you if I thought I was setting you up to be hurt."

"Who can tell with these things? So many times I was sure it was right with someone but it never lasted. Now that I think about it, there was only one time in the past when I didn't know- in a big part of me- during the whole relationship that it was going to end spectactularly bad. That happens when you date mainly two types of men: safety nets and psychos. The two times I picked amazing men...I didn't pick at all. It just snuck up on me and then it was my life." After staring at him for a long moment she said "You're the second time."

"Then don't lay down and give up."

She moved out of his arms. "This is my kid we're talking about here! You know what that is, Jason. You know what its like to sacrifice everything you want for something they need. So don't guilt trip me cause you're better than that."

He pinched his nose. He brought down his hand and snapped back at her "You think I want Sam hurt?"

"She won't be hurt! At least not for long. Because if she is then this is over. Its over and I'll make it up to her."

"And who will make it up to you? What we lose?"

"I'll deal with the loss. Its better than Sam crying and feeling like I betrayed her. I've let her down so many times since she was first placed in my arms. She's your ex- fiancee.....she's my baby girl. I owe her more than you do and I'll be the one who decides what happens next."

"I won't try and tell you what to do, Alexis, but Sam's married to Matt now. She's married and she's happy. That's her life now. This is ours. Yeah, this might upset her for a few days, but don't jump to the worst case scenario already. You're preparing to just give up."

"I'm preparing to do what I have to!" she screamed at him, then walked back into the house, while Jason stood there staring at the water, refusing to watch her walk away from him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hours went by with Jason and Alexis moving around each other, in her lake house, tensely. The girls were home and they had to act like things were fine. After dinner, homework and baths- this little routine that Jason loved in a way he couldn't put to words- he called up Spinelli to come over.

Alexis was surprised when he came through the door. "Hello, you missed dinner. Where's Maxie? There's leftovers you can take home if you want. Don't worry, Jason cooked, not me."

Spinelli smiled sheepishly at her. He loved her like a mother and he was always glad when she doted on him. "The Jackal will graciously accept your offer. Maximista is so busy with work obligations and wedding arrangements that we are eating bar-be-que potato chips for breakfast and lunch. It's the food of Gods but I need more substance."

Jason said to him "Thanks for doing this tonight. We appreciate it."

"I'm happy to help out.

Alexis looked between them.

Jason said to Alexis "Spinelli is going to watch the girls for a while."

"I really can't go out. I have briefs to look over and that horrible, anal retentive judge to face in the morning. You know the one, the barracuda with a bad dye job."

Jason said, in a tone that told her how much this meant to him, "I want to take you on a ride on my bike."

Their eyes held. Spinelli said "The Jackal will go check on The Mini Goddesses."

When they were alone, Jason stood there silently, refusing to give her an out. This was an important part of who he was- and of all his memories- and he wanted to share it with her.

Alexis said "I'm not dressed for a ride."

"I'll wait while you change."

"I just don't know. Me on a motorcycle? I'm not the type really. Now Carly, I'm sure she loves to be on that bike. She'd probably mow down a crosswalk full of nuns to get to you and that bike. But I'm not really anything like her, am I?"

"I don't need you to be Carly. I need you to be Alexis."

"Well I'll always be that, Jason. I'll always be Alexis. That means I don't jump at the chance to ride motorcycles at night on dark, twisty country roads where we can crash and die in a fiery explosion. And that means that I don't just throw away what my daughter feels so I can keep dating someone- no matter what I feel. And that means that you and I will always be complicated in ways you've never been with someone else before. I hope that when you look back you remember that the ways....the ways.." she got teary "all the ways we are..."

He crossed the room and held her arms.

Alexis went on "Different from any other relationships you had or I had are all the ways....we were phenomenal."

He kissed her, softly melding their lips together. She threw her arms around his neck and then laid her head on his shoulder. He whispered "I just want to protect you from pain tomorrow but I can't."

She whispered back "I wouldn't change the last two weeks for anything so if there's pain...there's pain...but we had us for a little while."

He was just so used to losing. Mostly because he made sure he did. If was as if he was purposefully destroying all his own chances for happiness for some reason. Maybe guilt. Maybe it all went back to the day he woke up from the accident and he knew he had destroyed his parents by surviving but not being their Jason anymore. Maybe that is why, really, every time any woman reached out her hand and begged him to let them be happy- a wedding, a baby, even one night, one kiss, one more chance- he found an excuse to martyr himself. Some sick psychological thing buried way down that made him fuck up all his happy endings.

This time it was just the opposite though. He didn't want to just nod his head and walk away. He wanted to fight. But Alexis wouldn't fight. She was resigned to Sam deciding for them.

Even if Sam was fine with it, it bothered Jason that Alexis could not get herself worked up enough to tell him that no matter what, no matter how, they would find a way to be together. He couldn't change how she felt though. All he could do was take her on a ride tonight and show her what being with him was all about.

Freedom.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis felt exhilarated. The wind whipped her hair, under the helmet, as she held onto Jason with all her might. When he finally stopped they were parked on the roof- in a parking garage- at an expensive five star hotel in Rochester.

She took off her helmet and stood up. "WOW! Jason....eeee..." She grabbed his arm. "You didn't tell me it was like that."

He gave her a small grin, amused by her delight.

Alexis went on "Look at me, a biker chick. Stefan would not believe this if he could see me now. He would wonder what became of my upbringing and propriety. Sleeping with mobsters and riding motorcycles to out-of-town hotels, all of places. By the way...hotel?"

"Spinelli will spend the night."

"I need to be home when the girls wake up."

"You will be."

She smiled widely and pushed at his shoulder. "Lets go for one more ride before we get a suite....and, just so you know, I want one with the biggest juccuzi bath they have in this place."

He nodded at the back of the bike. "Get on."

She climbed back on. "You're a fun date, Jason."

He just looked back. Their eyes met and held. He kissed her, sweetly. When he broke the kiss he put the helmet on her. "All right. You ready?"

She put a thumb up in the air. Soon they were back on the open road again, finding comfort in being free and together, instead of free and alone- which they both did for way too many years.


	57. jason and alexis, twenty three

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

Note- Kristina Adella has not be sorased for this.

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 23**

Alexis watched Jason as she sat on the other side of the hot tub that was in the corner of their suite. This was their last night before Sam came back from her honeymoon. Every moment had to count.

They'd already spent several hours riding around on his motorcycle. It was getting close to eleven pm and she had court in the next morning. But she couldn't go to sleep now.

Even though they had sex that afternoon, and it was amazing, she wanted him again. She wanted just one more time of him throbbing inside of her. Just in case they had to let this go tomorrow because her daughter just couldn't handle it.

Alexis knew Sam was a grown up. But Sam was still her baby. And her feelings mattered.

Alexis couldn't let Sam be in her mind right now though. She pushed all those worries out and stared at the naked man who had steam rising around him two feet away from her.

He had ordered wine from room service for Alexis and a beer for him. Their drinks sat on the side of the tub. They had just sunken into the water. He asked "How did Spinelli say the girls are?"

Alexis had called to check on them while Jason was paying for the room service. As soon as the door closed they both started undressing and silently got in the hot tub. "They're sleeping. He said something about Kristina instant messaging a boy but he has to be confused. She's not old enough to be into boys yet."

"We better get those IM records."

"I really don't think it can be anything serious. She's just a kid."

"No harm in checking."

"I suppose I just want to believe she's not at the age to be more than mildly curious about the opposite sex. Don't boys still have cooties at that age?"

"Never know."

"Sonny will be calling for a sit down with his parents and scare them out of their minds."

"You don't seem upset about the idea."

She smiled at him. "Not as upset as you. I know she's too young. What could it be? A crush. It can't be more than a little, inconsequential crush...right? She's a kid!"

"Right."

Alexis adored the fact that Jason seemed to like taking care of her two youngest daughters. She knew it didn't make up for one ounce of his pain over his boys but it made him happy to be around her girls. And she was happy to have around another man who cared for them. She usually didn't get to feel like someone was right there next to her helping her parent. She parented alone, while Ric and Sonny did the same.

But when Jason was in her home, for those few hours, it was as close to a two parent home as Alexis had gotten in years.

After a moment he asked "Molly get her spelling done?"

"Spinelli said he taught her the orgins of the words she was stumbling on. I'm sure after he was done with his long explanation she will never forget any of those words and their meanings or spellings again. He's going to be a fantastic father one day."

"Its good his private eye business is working out."

"I agree. Its safer for him and Maxie that way."

"I should have never brought him into my business."

"You gave him a family. I don't hear him complaining about that. But I won't lie....I'm thrilled he's a former mobster." She slid across the tub, wrapping her arms around his neck and straddling his sat back on his legs so that his cock was in between them. "I have enough concerns about the mobsters I know already that I don't need another to worry about."

Their eyes met as she slipped one hand beneath the water and started to stroke him.

In a low, intense, tone Jason demanded "Tell me something."

She kept stroking him. "Hmmm?"

"Do you want a life with me, Alexis?"

Her chest tightened painfully. She suddenly found it hard to breath. Jason lifted her up and, with her lust dazed help, impaled her onto him, as her mind swam with frantic thoughts.

_What is he asking me? Oh my God, that feels so good...God, I would do anything to keep feeling this good right now...well not anything. You know what I mean. A life with him? A life? As in....what? What does this man want from me? Why is he pushing for more already when we don't know if we even have a tomorrow yet? Ohhhhh, God, so good_.....She rode him, as she moaned loudly...._We're so good together. Working together, cooking dinner, when we're with the kids and when we're alone....we get each other. But a life together...a life...after two weeks...but they were great weeks...OH MY GOD. Right there, Jason._

"Oh, God. Right there. Right there."

"Answer me," he said, between clenched teeth.

"OH! FUCK!"

"Alexis!" He sped up their pace. "Say it. Just fucking say it to me."

"Jason," she whimpered.

His mouth bent and his tongue licked at her nipple. He sucked it into his mouth.

She threw back her head. Her hair was halfway in the water. Their image made an erotic portrait in the mirror behind the tub.

He let her breast slip from his lips. Shifting slightly he leaned back and, using his hands on her hips, kept working her up and down him, faster and faster, as he ground out "If its true....then say it. Let me hear it."

Her walls clutched around his cock, as she rode out an orgasm that left her screaming wildly. He came a moment later, his own eyes finally closing as his head fell back on the edge of the tub.

Afterwards, Alexis collapsed against him. She stroked her hand over his slightly damp hair and then over his cheek, as she was breathing heavily. His eyes opened and met hers. They were filled with hurt.

Tears came to her eyes. "I want a future with you."

"You couldn't say it."

"So you think I'm lying now? When did I ever lie to you since we got together, Jason?"

He lifted her off him and then climbed out of the tub. He grabbed a towel and put it around his waist, picked up his beer, and the headed for the bathroom. Alexis slammed her hand onto the controls of the hot tub, twisting the knob to turn it off. The water stopped moving. She lay back against the edge of the tub, as the shower came on in the other room.

_Do you want a life with me? _he had asked, as if that was a simple question she could yell yes to.

Jason knew better, damn it. But he wasn't being logical anymore. He had lost that ability when it came to her. Alexis could see him changing every day.

She just didn't know how to tell this man that all his changing and all his feelings and all his dreams might not matter...because she was a mother and what came first were her girls. She said it to him, on more than one occasion, but she didn't say it right because he was hurting now.

He thought this wasn't hard on her, like it was on him. He thought she wasn't aching inside at the idea of them ending their affair.

But Jason, who so many people said was always right about everything, was dead wrong this time. The idea of losing him was tearing apart her heart.

She should have said that though.

XXXXXX XXXXXXXXX

The spray of the shower hit Jason. His head was a mess. He knew he was out of control. He knew he went way over the line with Alexis tonight. He shouldn't have pulled that on her.

But the clock was ticking on the night stand behind them as they made love and all he could think was that she didn't even give a good damn if they ended everything tomorrow.

He wanted to hear her scream, at the top of her lungs, I will not walk out on you!

Maybe it was all a response to Elizabeth. Or maybe he wanted Alexis to act like Carly. She would have screamed and screamed and screamed till the cops got called about how she wouldn't let him that it would make him and Carly work out. Because it wouldn't.

Maybe he just wanted Alexis to feel like he did. That they were right together. Too right to give up.

She said "I want a future with you." But how bad did she want it? Not bad enough to do a thing to keep him.

Jason could taste bile in his mouth, as he spit in the shower, dry heaving. He hadn't let himself be this wrecked over the idea of losing a woman in over a decade.

Every other woman-even Carly, even when it was nearly killing him- he told to leave him behind. But he wasn't going to tell Alexis that. Not necessarily because the love was stronger. It was because he was older and not foolish enough to give up something good ever again.

Still....he was going to lose her anyway.

"God damn it," he muttered, as he twisted the faucet, turning off the shower.

This is why he didn't ever look for love. It left him feeling destroyed every time. Yet he wanted love. He needed it. He needed her...so damn bad.

Because when they were good, they were so good. They were what he wanted years to feel like, instead of empty and lonely and wasted.

He slammed his hand against the wall. If she would just fight. When Alexis Davis fought for someone she was amazing. Fierce and intense and unstoppable.

She just needed to fight.

But Jason couldn't make her do it. She had to do it on her own. Or they would end tomorrow.

He knew that. He knew Sam was not going to smile and say "Congratulations, Mom."

He slept with Sam for almost three years. He knew what was about to happen the next day. He wasn't fucking stupid. And neither was Alexis.


	58. jason and alexis, twenty four

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 24**

Patrick was about to risk his surgeon's hands to pound Johnny Zacchara into a bloody mess.

Hours earlier, when Lucia was released from General Hospital, Emily had been stalling waiting for Johnny, who swore he would pick them up and take them to Emily's house. She lived right next door to the home Patrick had bought for himself, Liz and their kids to share.

All Emily's calls to Johnny's cell went to voicemail. Elizabeth was in a surgery with Monica. Lucky was working a stake out. Nikolas was still, after nearly two weeks, in Russia on business. Gia and Sonny had taken their yatch on a weekend cruise. The Quatermaines were just too high maintenance to call on in a time of crisis. Edward would be bellowing up a storm if Emily called him to take her home, dragging Alice behind him, while Tracy and Luke argued till someone's ears started to bleed.

Or worse Luke and Tracy might flirt. That was impossible to stomach.

Emily had taken a cab to the hospital and it looked like she would have to take one back home, with her newly healthy four month old daughter in tow, and no car seat. Patrick saw red over the whole messed up situation.

He knew that Johnny had not promised Patrick, in so many words, that he would take care of Emily but it was a well known fact between everyone who knew Johnny and Emily that the man was deeply in love with her and was broken after she dumped him. Now that Emily wanted him back- even though he had a girlfriend named Jane who waited tables at The Metro Court- Patrick had just figured Johnny would jump at the chance to spend his life right where he used to swear he wanted to be: with Em and Lucia.

Patrick would have never picked a mobster to love Elizabeth's best friend but that's who Emily fell for- back when she was brain washed and calling herself Rebecca- and that's who Emily had now decided she loved most and best and wanted to make a life with. Johnny would have to be a dumb ass to walk away from her for some insipid, flat chested, bubble gum smacking college girl.

But it looked like he had.

Or else he had let his idiotic self get killed doing his so-called job. Or locked up. He better hope it was one of those last two because if he had led Emily on for five days with his "We'll talk when our baby girl is well....I'll never let you two go again....You mean everything to me..." lines and that was just bullshit, then Zacchara was about to get knocked the fuck out.

Nobody just ignored Emily while they banged somebody else, got smiley and happy, got his rocks off and then later, when he was done, he'd call her. Hell no. Because Patrick would be the one answering the phone and the first words out of his mouth were going to be so ugly John Zacchara would think twice before he ever made Emily worry herself sick over him again.

Emily walked down the stairs of her house. Patrick was waiting in the living room. He had driven her home in his minivan that still had baby seats in it. He stayed around, ordering Chinese delivery for dinner, and helping her get Lucia bathed and asleep. He had left her in the nursery, watching her baby girl, and after twenty minutes Emily came down.

She said "You really don't have to stick around. I know you're exhausted after starting your shift at six today."

Now it was almost midnight. Johnny was eight hours late. Lucky hadn't called so it was real doubtful that John was arrested or in the morgue.

Patrick told Emily "I've never needed more than four hours sleep anyway. And I've pulled my fair share of all nighters too."

"That was during college, right? You're not exactly-"

"Hey!"

She gave him a weak smile. "Its seriously cool. I'm worried about him but I've called GH ten times already. He's not a patient. You called Mercy, how many times?"

"Too many."

"We can't do anything else. I'm just going to go to bed."

Patrick sat down. Emily sighed. He patted the couch next to him. She came over and sat down. He said "More than likely, there is a good explanation for this. He's sitting locked up in some other town, maybe. In his line of work, it could be that. He might not be hurt and he might not be just blowing you off. But, if he is with her, Emily.....he's a fool."

"I brought this on myself. I pushed him away. He found someone else to love and I just have to learn to accept that."

"The point is that he's told you this week he wanted you back. And that better be the truth."

"You don't have to fight my battles. I feel horrible that you're not home with your wife and the boys right now. Please, Patrick, don't treat me like fragile glass. I'm not. I can bear this...if Johnny can't leave Jane tonight...I'll find a way to bear it." She looked away. "Its Lucia who really gets cheated most. But I can't blame anyone but myself for cheating my little girl out of a happy home."

"It takes two people to make something work. But only one person to make it fail. I don't think you're that person if he's with her tonight....because he might have made her promises....but the only thing that really matters is who he loves. And he can't love her...not if he once loved you."

She smiled slightly again. "Are you saying that a man could never fall out of love with me?"

"Not a smart man."

She smiled a little wider. "Okay. You cheered me up. Mission accomplished. Now go home to your family please. I happen to love them all, like they are my own, so don't make me be the reason they miss you anymore tonight. I don't need you to hold my hand. I'm fine."

He held her hand. "Just till Lucky gets done with his stake out."

"Liz marries all the best guys in town."

Patrick flashed her a grin. "And she knows it too. She's even getting into Nascar for me. What a woman I found. Matt's so jealous he can taste it."

"Since he just married Sam, I doubt that."

"Don't be so sure. He's nuts over his wife but he knows I got the hotter chick."

"Liz will love to hear you say that."

There was a knock on the door. They both tensed. Emily jumped up and ran over there. She flung the door open. There was Johnny, with haunted eyes filled with bitter anguish.

She opened her arms- forgiving him everything in an instant- and he fell into her embrace.

Patrick looked at them. The guy looked pretty messed up, emotionally. He must have a good excuse for the shit he pulled today. He could live...for now...without any bruises on his face.

But he better watch his step because there were men all over Port Charles just waiting to sock him one to his jaw if he broke the heart of Emily Bowen Quartermaine.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis was wearing just her underwear and her button up mauve shirt, sitting on the bed, sipping her glass of wine, when Jason came out of the bathroom. He wore a towel and a pissed off expression.

His jaw was tense, jumping beneath his skin.

He picked up his boxers and slipped them on. Then he found his socks. He got into his jeans. All in silence. He jerked on his shirt. Then he sat down and started to put on his boots.

She took another sip of her wine, letting it slowly slide down her throat. She remembered this feeling well. The day Ric packed his suitcase. The day Carly came back from the dead.

Chances slipping away.

She knew it was her own guilt over giving Sam up at birth that kept her from even thinking about telling Sam that Alexis was going to be with Jason and it would just have to be something Sam dealt with. Alexis, rationally, knew what was causing her to behave as she was....yet she couldn't change how she felt.

Jason had his shoes on. He grabbed his leather jacket and keys.

Alexis broke the silence. "Are you coming back tonight? Because I can take the train home in the morning, if you prefer."

He gave her a hard look that asked _You don't know me at all, do you_? before he said "I'll be back in an hour."

There was no good-bye kiss this time. She didn't know if there would ever be any kisses between them again. Even if, by some insane twist of fate and miracle, Sam was okay with her ex now sleeping with her Mom, that might not matter anymore because Jason wasn't okay with Alexis not being willing to fight for them.

And Alexis wasn't about to apologize for loving her kid more than herself.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason sat down at the bar, drinking and thinking about what he wanted to say to Alexis. He didn't like dwelling on the past but there was no denying that certain moments kept coming to his mind. Standing in a rose garden with Carly. At an airport with Brenda. When he found Courtney in South America and their unborn baby was dead already.

He knew he was at another moment like that. But he wasn't young anymore. He couldn't angrily tell someone, like he told Robin, that he didn't need them in his life anymore. And he couldn't willing let go like he had with Liz.

He wanted to make a home with Alexis. He wanted his life to be filled with moments when they were connected. When they made sense. When they got each other. When they didn't need to talk even.

When she was waiting on him to come home and kiss her neck.

Maybe he just wasn't the sort of man she wanted all that with. Maybe that was why it was easy for her to let Sam decide their fate...Sam who was never more emotional than when she was dealing with her mother and her feelings of abandonment. Alexis knew that. She had to know Sam wasn't going to take this well.

Alexis might just want this easy way out. That way there was no chance she got stuck living with a mobster.

She had said "I want a future with you." But he felt like he forced it out of her. Never before in his life had he even tried to do that to a chick. Make her say things she didn't really feel.

He was completely sprung over Alexis Davis. And he was starting to hate that fact.


	59. jason and alexis, twenty five

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 25**

Johnny clung to Emily, in her doorway, burying his face in her sweet smelling hair. She finally let him go and that is when he noticed Patrick there. "Hi, man."

Patrick nodded. "I should get home. Lucky for me, its just a short walk. Good night."

"Thanks for everything," Emily told him before she gave Patrick a very grateful smile.

"Thank you, man, for looking after my family," Johnny said.

Patrick nodded. He headed out the door, across the lawn, and then he went into his own home, while Emily was locking her door.

Johnny asked her"How's our girl?"

"She's sleeping. She's fine. No fever today at all."

They stared at each other for a long moment.

Johnny was eight hours late and he knew Emily had to be worried and also fuming. In an emotion filled whisper he told her, "I'm so sorry, baby."

Baby. He hadn't called her that in nine months. Since she was pregnant and yelling at him to get out of her life because he didn't really know her. Lucky knew her. Sonny knew her. Patrick knew her. Nikolas knew her. All her girlfriends like Liz, Gia, and Robin knew her so well. But Johnny...he was from after...when she was Rebecca...and he didn't know shit about Emily.

Except he did.

He knew her body and that spot on her neck that made her moan. He knew how she liked her pizza and he knew what movies she would refuse to watch- violent action flicks with former wrestlers or the governor of California topped her don't list. And he knew she was scared of not being good enough for anyone. He knew he loved her. He knew she meant everything to him.

But all she knew was that he fell for Rebecca and Rebecca was a figment of Helena's evil imagination.

Johnny went on "I'm sorry I didn't pick you two up today."

"What happened? Was it work? There was no way you could call?"

"It wasn't work. It was Jane."

Anger jumped into her eyes. And Emily angry could get so ugly. She rarely went there but when she did, it was loud and it was life changing. He liked seeing that anger though because it meant she gave a damn.

"If it was Jane then just get out! OUT! She was who you needed more than seeing about me and your daughter? Then go back to Jane! I pushed you to her in the first place. Well, there's the door, walk out it and find your way back to her, Johnny! I'm sure whatever Jane needed that took eight hours was worth your daughter's whole future!"

"She tried to kill herself."

Emily stilled. "What?"

"She took my gun and she threatened to shoot herself. I ended things with her a few days ago but she showed up at my place, crying, and she wouldn't calm down...and then she hugged me and wouldn't leave go...I was really scared for her...and then she grabbed my gun. It took hours to talk her down and then I had to take her to the Shadybrook, wait for her Mom to show up, and explain everything....I didn't call because I didn't have my cell and by the time I was at the hospital and she was checked in...It was just a half an hour ago...I figured I'd just come here and explain in person. I didn't call the cops on her because I don't want this getting in the papers and haunting her for life."

"I did this to her. I made her crazy."

"No. She was messed up before I met her. If anything, I did this. I knew I couldn't ever love her and I used her."

"Do you think she'll be okay?"

"I'll keep checking with her Mom but I don't think I should ever see her again. It might trigger a relapse, once she gets past whatever is going on in her head right now."

"God, Johnny. We've made such a disaster. For that woman and for our own baby and for ourselves...or I did. You wanted to be here all along....didn't you?"

He held her arms. "You know I did. I love you, Emily."

"I still love you, too. Now what though? Can we get us back?"

"Now we start over. We date and we try to give our kid a family she feels safe in."

"And we give her your last name."

Emily had been determined to raise her daughter alone so gave her Quatermaine for her last name.

His eyes lightened with unshed tears. "Great idea."

"Lucia Bowen Zacchara. A little bit of Lucky, me and you. Not too bad for a baby girl's name."

"I like it."

She smiled softly and leaned closer to him. He gave her a soft kiss. "Lets go up and see Luce."

Emily smiled wider. "You're such a sucker for her."

"She's perfect. Just like her Mom."

"She is perfect. She looks like her Daddy. Your hair, and your eyes and your nose and your ears....she just has my lips and cheekbones."

"She was made in love, Emily. Never doubt that, okay? I loved you then and I love you now and I'd take you back even if you made me wait fifty years instead of nine months."

"I don't want to make you wait anymore, Johnny." She took his hand and led him upstairs. They crept into their daughter's room. "There's Daddy little angel. I'm glad you're her father...I know I always made you think I wanted Lucky instead....I'm sorry for that."

"Whenever I thought that I just remembered back to what it was like...you and me locked up in that suite at the Cosmopolitan for a week straight....and I told myself....he'd never make you as scream like I did...at least he better not."

Emily giggled. And then covered his mouth, playfully, with her hand. "There is a baby present. Save those memories for when its all adult time."

Pushing her hand down, he gave her a very heated kiss and soon they were in her bedroom making love at a frantic and desperate pace.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

She's a smart woman. Brave, usually. But, damn, is she complicated. She's kept secrets from the world for all of her life. She was born a secret and she is the keeper of secrets.

But Alexis does not lie to herself.

So she has known the truth all along. She just prefers to talk really fast around the truth. And that is what she did when Jason came back into the hotel room.

She started babbling and he just stood there, looking a little drunk and a lot mad and really confused about them.

"Listen, I know you're worried about tomorrow and what Sam will say, and so am I. And this worry has made us both a little crazy today. Just look at what happened. I yelled at you. I don't yell at you. Unless you give me reason to yell then, of course, I would. But you were just standing there on the docks saying very nice things to me and I yelled. So that proves I'm emotionally frazzled and you, though stoic most times, seem to also be teetering on the brink. And that's okay. Teeter. I can take that. I'm not scared of you being emotional or upset or pissed off. Its refreshing. The cool facade is broken for someone other than Carly....why did I say her name? I don't want her in this conversation. My point is...Jason....we are both very stressed out and when you asked me to say what I wanted...you asked at a delicate time and that is why I didn't answer right away...not because I'm unsure....I know that we work well together. I do think we should try and keep this going, if at all possible. Don't you agree?"

He didn't answer. He walked over to a chair, sat down, and took off his boots. With a thud, they both hit the floor.

She said "Jason, answer me. Don't shut down like we're five and I just kicked sand in your face at the playground. Like you're just going to take your toys back and go home. You need to talk to me about this."

"There's nothing left to say. You've already made up your mind."

Each word was ice cold. So cold he didn't even feel like her Jason anymore.

"What does that mean? I've made up my mind. That doesn't even answer my question. Have you changed your mind about us?"

"You're determined to let Sam choose your future. So what do you want me to say to you right now?"

"Look. Its after 1 am and I'm exhausted. I have court in the morning with that battle ax judge who has a vendetta against me and I have to meet my daughter for dinner and tell her something no daughter would ever want to hear. So, could you please, stop making this all so much worse on me?"

He stood up, ripped off his shirt, and came to bed in just his jeans. Flipping off the light, he lay down, as she sat on the bed still. His silence was deafening. Gone was the man who was going to force her to put up a fight for them.

And still, as she lay next to him, not touching in the dark, she hadn't admitted the truth.

The truth: If she fights for him not only may she lose Sam...but also it will mean she has to open up to Jason that part of her heart up that she protects and maybe she'll lose Jason one day anyway.

If she fights for him...she'll have to let him love all of her.

If she fights for him.....she'll have to risk everything. Her heart and soul breaking again. More than she risked for Ric. And she married that man.

If she fights for Jason....that means she can't live without Jason. That means more than her saying she desires him in her future. Sure she does. They're great together. But can't live without him?

God in Heaven, can she go there for any man ever again? Does he even know what he is asking her?

She figured he must. Because in all he had said Jason Morgan already admitted that he can't live without her.

And any man who admitted that would feel sick if the woman looked back at him with unsure eyes.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason woke up to the feel of Alexis sliding his zipper down on his jeans. His eyes popped open. Early morning, just after dawn, sunlight came through the window.

"Alexis," he murmured, while she slipped her hands into his boxers.

"Shhh...this is just a dream."

Damn. This woman was so fucking hot that it was no wonder she drove him crazy. "I don't....dream....hardly ever."

She was stroking him.

"Then this is a fantasy, Jason." She licked up the length of him.

He let out a groan of pleasure.

He hadn't thought they'd ever make love again so this was like a gift. One last time when she was completely undone and wild and intense and turned on and screaming over him. Because he knew, now that her mouth was on him, he had to get inside of her again. Feel that warmth. That heat. That tightness.

Feel her one more time before she completely gave up on loving him.

XXXXXXXXXXX

When he was throbbing and thick and just about to come, Jason said, in a deep, lust filled tone, "Alexis," the word telling her to stop.

She kept sucking him, her mouth a tight suction on his cock, her hands caressing him. Silently telling him to go ahead.

Jason didn't want to come though.

Because then he would have to wait a while and get hard again. Usually that was fine because he could pleasure her but at the state they were right now she might talk herself out of that and just head for the shower to get ready for going home, getting her girls off to school and herself off to work. Jason didn't want to risk that.

He grunted out "Let me fuck you."

She eased off him. She was wearing a button up mauve shirt and white panties. Her eyes were wide with plenty of questions about them. She knew he was mad at her.

He wasn't even sure she really wanted them to last.

But he knew one thing. He wanted to make love with her another time. Wanted to come inside of her.

Jason told her "Strip for me."

She stood up and started to unbutton her shirt, while her eyes held his. He could see she was giving him her trust in that moment. And somehow, in all the memorable sex they had- that time with the handcuffs, that time they couldn't talk at all because the kids were sleeping and they made slow, sweet, silent love to each other, and the time he put the nipple rings on her- they hadn't had as much trust as in that moment of her stripping.

Because now there was anger and pain and there was fear between them. Now it really wasn't just sex.

Not that it ever really had been just sex. Jason never thought of it that way. He wanted a deeper connection with her from their kiss on the balcony at the Metro Court.

Alexis let her shirt fall from her shoulders. She placed her thumbs in her panties and pushed them down. She stepped out of them.

Jason told her "Let me see you touch yourself for me."

She bit her bottom lip. She placed one foot on the bed and then slipped a finger into herself.

Jason let out a moan. His hand went to his own cock. He asked her "Do you get how much I want you in my life? Don't you....don't you want me?"

She whimpered lustfully as she sped up her finger.

Jason quickly stood up, picked up Alexis, laid her on the bed, then slammed into her, with her legs pushed up to her chest.

He thrusts were quick and relentless for a few minutes, and then he slowed down, as he started a gentle pace.

She was sweaty and breathing hard. He kissed her with a sensual sweetness. After long minutes he moved his mouth to her ear "Give up if you want to. I can't stop you and I won't beg you. But....just know....know...I'd make a life with you...if you let me."

She dug her nails into his back as her body convulsed with an orgasm. "JASON!"

The sound of her screaming his name made him come.

Alexis ended up giving him one more kiss, after he rolled off of her, and then she slipped from bed and went to take a shower. Within an hour they were on his bike again, after a few cups of coffee they shared in near silence, and then they were heading home.

Heading-quite possibly- straight into two broken hearts.

Note- The sex Jason thought about took place on the Mon-Wednesday time period between the chapter where Lucia goes into the hospital and the chapter with Alexis' cooking lesson with Sonny. It was not shown in this story.


	60. jason and alexis, twenty six

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 26**

Alexis stood next to Jason's bike, early Friday morning, after he brought her home from their night in a hotel in Rochester. The guards were all around.

Jason was still sitting on his bike. Alexis took off her helmet and handed it to him. "Do you want to come in and see the girls?"

The girls. Her little gifts to share with him. He missed his own kids and hers always made him smile.

"I should get on home."

Now he wouldn't even take that small pleasure from Alexis. She stiffened. Their little life together was unraveling. Two weeks and she would already miss him desperately. "That's fine. Have a good day at work then."

"You too."

Cold. That's how he was now. And she only had herself to blame. "Good bye, Jason."

He just put back on his helmet, revved up his bike, and left without another word. Alexis watched him go. All his words to her about needing a future with her rang in her head:

_Do you get how much I want you in my life? Don't you....don't you want me?_

_Don't lay down and give up._

_Just know....know...I'd make a life with you...if you let me._

_I'm not giving you up._

Jason Morgan. The man who they called Stone Cold. But sometimes he wasn't. Sometimes he was just lonely, and he was just hurt, and he was just sad, and he was just in love.

And Alexis had let him think that didn't matter to her. But it did. She knew that her daughter had to matter too....and that her heart was scared to love Jason back.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I should have known better!" Carly screamed at Alexis, just after court broke for recess.

The court was clearing as people headed to lunch. People stared at Carly, as she stood in the aisle.

Alexis rushed toward her. "SHHHH! This is a public place. This is my workplace. You can't do whatever you are thinking about doing here." She grabbed Carly's arm. "You see that burly gentleman over there in the uniform with the gun? That is Mr. Bailiff...Jim... and he likes me. Don't make him arrest you today."

Carly jerked her arm back. Her eyes were filled with fury. She hissed at Alexis "I trusted you."

"What are you going on about? I'm in the middle of an attempted murder case. I don't have time for you. Whatever I did...missed a play date....called Jax when it was your time...which you seem to think is all the time except for, of course, when you are occupied with your other men. Like Sonny and Jason and poor Max, who Diane is lucky she does not want to marry-since she doesn't believe in that institution- because he will never really be over you. Whatever I did in your mind....I'm sorry."

"You think that cuts it?"

Alexis sighed, glancing around at the few people who were still in the courtroom. "Can we continue this arguement later? I have to use the bathroom, get some lunch and make a phone call. This is only an hour recess."

"Nothing comes before Jason."

Alexis stilled.

Carly went on "You thought I wouldn't find out? You shouldn't have ever laid a hand on him if this is what you planned to do to him."

"And what is it you believe I've done?"

"He's hurt! You hurt him!"

"What did Jason tell you?"

"He doesn't have to tell me anything and he wouldn't because he's protecting you. But I could see with my own eyes when I went to his office. So why don't you clue me in on exactly how you messed up and what you plan to do to fix this."

"Isn't this where you tell me to keep 100 feet between me and Jason for the rest of my life?"

"That's what I'd tell someone like Liz, sure. This is a different circumstance though. Stop talking around the issue and start doing your blabbering thing about how you are going to make my best friend happy again! And quick. Cause if my earrings and rings come off....Jim won't be able to save you."

Alexis rolled her eyes at the dramatics of it all. She grabbed her briefcase. "I'm going to the ladies room. Nature comes before your wrath."

Carly stalked after her. "You might as well tell me what happened because he will tell me. Eventually he tells me everything that really matters. But he'll hold out till it just about kills him. So you give it up. What was the fight about? And if you were stupid enough to pick another man over him then, really, Alexis, you are just too dumb to live and the judge should replace you with a box of hair because your client would have a better chance of getting off."

Alexis walked into the bathroom and looked for a stall. There was only one open. The one that had a broken door for months. "Can you hold this door?"

Carly sighed.

Alexis went in the stall. Carly held the door.

Carly ranted "He's so hurt. I can't believe you could do this to him. Do you want to end up back with someone psycho like Ric or Jerry? Do you want to lose the best man to ever love you? And probably the man that gave you the best sex you've ever had!"

"Could you consider using a little decorum? What do you think?"

Other women came out of stalls and washed their hands.

Carly went on "I still haven't heard your confession of guilt! Did you fuck around with someone else?"

"Be quiet, you loud mouth harpy!"

Carly huffed. Alexis came out of the stall. She whispered "If you must know, we never told Sam about us and she's coming home today. That's it."

"That caused all this? I don't think so! I want the truth. And if you don't give it to me then....I'm putting you on warning...I very well may withdraw my support of this relationship."

"Ohhhhhh." Alexis pretended to shiver. She walked over to the sink and washed her hand. "Well then I guess Jason will leave me since you're no longer on board."

"You think it doesn't matter what I think? It matters. He won't leave you. But will you ever have a moment of absolute, no ghosts haunting him, pure bliss again? No. Because I'll be there in the room with you. What I think about you two will be there...and it will linger in his head...and make everything so much harder for him....until one day he'll stop trying and you'll be yesterday's heartbreak, like the rest of them."

Alexis looked in the mirror at Carly. "You honestly believe what you're saying, don't you? Amazing! The narcissism has reached new levels in you. I don't know how many times a week you see Dr. Winters but you better up it!"

"It's the truth. If I'm against you and Jason, then he won't be as happy as he could be. But I don't want that. I want him happy. He told me you were the one who was gonna make him happy again. But I didn't see happy today in his eyes. So, tell me, what in the hell have you done to my best friend?"

"Are you going to pull my hair now?"

"This isn't a game!"

The bathroom cleared out.

Alexis went over and locked the bathroom door. Someone tried to come in. "Out of Order!" she yelled. She looked at Carly. "Listen to me.....butt out."

"Never. I love him."

"You're married to Jax. Love him!"

"I do. I love my husband in a way you'll never understand and we're happy. But Jason will always be my other half....and I believed in you and him. Now you let me down. And you let him down. And we're both very disappointed and I'm pissed off and I just don't know if I can forgive you this time."

"Oh, well, I think I'll somehow survive if you don't."

"How can you be so flippant? This is Jason we're talking about here."

In a softer tone, Alexis said "I know that."

Letting out a calming breath, Carly asked "What happened?"

"Nothing but what I said. Sam's coming home. She'll probably hate the idea of her mother being with her former lover...fiance...her want-to-be baby daddy...the man she wanted to raise my grandchild with. She'll be rightfully upset and that will cause problems. Jason is just worried, as am I. We're trying to cope with the impending fall out and we don't need you making it any worse with your hysterics."

"He isn't worried. He's hurt. And if you really don't know why then I need to go back to his office and find out."

"Carly, don't! Leave him work! You mess with his head and he could be killed today. Do you want that on your conscious?"

"What are you working overtime to hide from me? I can't help you if you won't talk to me."

Alexis sighed. "You help me. Sure. That is a definite sign of the apocalypse."

"I'd do anything for Jason, and anything to help someone he loves. You're the woman Jason loves now."

"Don't throw around the L word, please, and kindly take your nosy, skinny ass out of my relationship."

"Not a chance! You're the second woman that I'm allowing to be with him and this time, neither Jason nor I, plan to give up easily. So you better shape up! SHAPE UP!"

Alexis covered her ears. "Did you take your pills today?"

"Ha ha. If only this was funny. He's hurt and you caused it. What did you say to him? Was there a fight?"

"Do you really want to help Jason and I work out?"

"I don't want him miserable again so yeah. I've come to terms with the fact that its you. I mean it could be worse. Hell, it has been worse! Robin the Saint. Liz the Martyr. Both little girls who can't handle Jason. And, even worse, they messed with his head. Tried to tell him how to think and feel and live and tell him I was a bitch for loving him as is."

"And somehow you believe I'm better for him?"

"Are you who I'd pick? No."

"As if you'd pick anyone. Really. Sell that story somewhere else. I have to go get lunch and no, you may not join me."

"We aren't done here! I wouldn't pick you for Jason....if he let me pick and if it couldn't be me, which it can't be right now because I'm happy with Jax and we've both decided Maggie Jay deserves a happy childhood. So since it can't be me, if I could pick, then I'd pick someone like Olivia. She's street smart and she's tough, ballsy, she don't take shit from nobody. But Jason doesn't want Olivia...he wants you! Okay, so I can make adjustments. I always do. I can deal with how things have ended up. But only if you are good to him....he spent so long feeling not good enough for Liz and her fantasy life that she tried to make him believe they could have....he can't go back to that place in his head. I didn't think you'd send him back there...and especially so soon! You know him. You know what you're doing to him and you're not a little, immature, girl playing at being a woman, like those two wenches who stole his kids-"

"ENOUGH! I like both of them and you know it was complicated."

"Whatever. Its always complicated. I still haven't figured out what you and Jason fought about but whatever is going on....make it right. Go to him and apologize and then, for God sake's, give him a good and happy life."

"Do you honestly want that?"

Tearfully, Carly told her "Yes." Her lips quivered.

Alexis looked away for a moment. When she looked back she said "Its only been two weeks. Why are you so invested in this? Or is the answer obvious? You invest all of yourself in all of his life from his choice in cereal to his choice in lovers?"

"I'm invested because he's invested. And if he loses one more time....he may shut down and that could be it. I didn't pick you! He picked you! I'm just saying it could suck so much worse if you were someone else but you're not someone else. I thought I knew you...even if you are a tight ass...you're strong and you're capable and you put yourself on the line for people you love. That's what he needs most...someone who can risk it all for him, even when it makes more sense to run away. So are you a runner, Alexis? Is that who you really are? Packing your bags for New York City again?"

"You take bitch to a whole new level. Your claws have claws. Were you born this way or is this some skill you acquired before I was unlucky enough to have our lives collide?"

"I'm a bitch when I have to be. Right now I don't have a spare million to get you away from Jason- like I tried to do with Sonny all those years back. But then again, at this point, I'd give millions just to see Jason looking like the way he did when he told me you were the one."

Tears came to Alexis eyes. Carly unlocked the door and jerked it open. "You're the one, Alexis. Make him happy!" Carly stormed out.


	61. jason and alexis, twenty seven

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon

September 2010

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 27**

Jason spotted Carly sitting on her couch in her living room, on Friday afternoon, and he walked right into her house without knocking. That was something he rarely would ever do unless he was extremely worried or really ticked off.

Today he was a little of both. "What did you do?" He threw up one hand.

She looked up from her magazine. "Shh. M.J is asleep."

He walked closer and hissed "Why did you go see Alexis today?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Unbelievable. I don't ever want Gino to be my gaurd again. I thought he knew better than to rat me out to you."

"Carly."

"What?"

He gave her a look, telling her to start talking.

She sighed. "We just had a little girl talk."

"You don't chat with Alexis. Not even about the kids. So what did you do? What did you do, Carly?"

"Why does it always have to be that I did something, Jase? Maybe all I did was make things better."

"Are you gonna keep-" he asked.

"Geez."

"Hiding this from me or just-"

"I swear I'm going to make Gino sorry he opened his mouth. And I'm having Max talk to him. Really drive the point home."

"Tell me what went down. Are you....? You're okay with me and her....right?"

She looked into his eyes for a long moment. Jason sat down on the couch next to her. The moment lingered. He stared straight ahead. She watched him, seeing the weariness he wore on his features once again. That look she was almost positive Alexis took away for good...and now it was back. And that was breaking Carly's heart to see.

Carly touched Jason's arm. "Were you wrong about her?"

He turned and looked at Carly. He shook his head, just slightly, no.

She smiled softly. "So lets figure this out, okay?" She leaned close to him and whispered "Lets not lose out again."

If only Jax could see them now...but maybe Jax wouldn't know what he was seeing...but Carly and Jason knew. Their eyes held.

Jason whispered, with Carly a mere inch from him, "Don't worry about it."

"Of course I worry. I love you."

He moved back. "I'll figure it out."

"Well....what went down? Are you guys fighting already?"

After a long silent moment, Jason said "Sam's coming home today."

"So?! That's the same excuse Alexis used. I mean...okay, sure...Sam will not be doing cart wheels. Who would? But so what? Sam really has no room to talk...she was in bed with Sonny, right? And Ric. Jax. All Alexis' men. Sam will get over this."

"Yeah, I think Sam will be okay with it in time. But it won't matter by then because Alexis will shut down on me the second Sam gets upset."

"It's a delicate situation...I get that. Sam's the kid so when she acted out and screwed around she had an excuse of being young and dumb- like I was with Tony. And Alexis is the mom so she isn't supposed to have excuses like that anymore. Its no one fault this happened though. Alexis did not set out to hurt Sam. No one saw this coming. I didn't see this coming, Jase! Did you?"

Her question asked: Did you keep this all from me again?

"No."

"Okay then. So it was just one of those things....I mean, it happens. Out of nowhere. Remember?"

He gave her a small grin. His words were gentle, as they both thought about Jake's, when he said "Carly, you got to leave Alexis alone, okay? She's stressed out these days and she don't need you going to hunt her down to tell her what to do."

"Well you wouldn't tell me why you were so worked up earlier so I had to do something."

"I know you want to help but don't. You can't help."

"I won't watch you just give up again."

His jaw tensed.

Carly lifted his arm and scooted close to him. She laid her head on his shoulder and put her arm around his waist. A full minute passed of her just comforting him. It grew emotional as he let down his walls for her.

She whispered "Jase, if there was ever going to be a time you were going to really fight....make this be the time, okay?"

Carly had done things like this before. She sent Jason to Sam on the night that he caught Sam with Ric. She had wanted Jason to pour his heart out to Sam and save their love.

And this time she wanted Jason to take a stand for Alexis...not let her easily slip away...and not say things like_ Its her choice _and _I can't tell her what to do. _Of course that was all true but he could yell and he could cry and he could tell her that two weeks just wasn't enough.

He wanted a life with her.

Carly, as his best friend and the woman who loved him longest, pushed past her own feelings and did what she knew he needed. She had his back.

They stayed on the couch together for another forty minutes, with her head on his shoulder. Every minute or so one of them would say something, sometimes things that didn't require anything to be said back. Mainly she was just putting him back together.

Finally the kids came in from school and the moment was broken. Maggie Jay started wailing upstairs and it was time for Carly to be a Mom again.

But whenever Jason needed her to be that other half of him...she'd come running to do that...even if that meant pushing him toward another woman. There were times she hated him falling for someone else. It depended on the woman and on how Jason talked about that woman.

Sometimes he was sure the woman was right for him- like with Liz- when she was all wrong. Sometimes he really wanted it to matter- like with Courtney- but, in the end, it didn't matter enough to keep trying. Sometime he cared- Brenda- but he wasn't able to break down his walls. Sometimes he gave almost all of himself- Sam- but he couldn't go that last inch.

Looking at him the night he told her that he was with Alexis, Carly had saw that Jason was finally past a lot of the fears and pain that held him back before. This time he was choosing life and love.

This time he was choosing to lay his heart wide open. And he was doing it all for Alexis.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Tell me I'm not the insane one around here," Alexis said, as she walked into Jax's office. "Okay, maybe insane was the wrong word to use, considering my family history. Nearly all Cassadines have a gene that is primed to mutate into insanity at any moment. Sane today, gone tomorrow. But, as of right now, I don't feel I'm being unreasonable or irrational to want to put the needs of my child before my own. Am I?....Oh, am I interrupting your work?"

Jax said into his phone "I'll take that under advisement and get back to you by the close of business. Have a good afternoon." He hung up. Standing up from behind his desk he said "This is about Jason, right?"

Alexis' gave him a guilty look. Her hands flew around as she spoke. "I'm sorry I haven't spoken to you about him before but...I know how you feel about your wife being close to him and so I knew you wouldn't like hearing that your best person is now close to the same alleged mafia enforcer...who are we kidding? Alleged was a gift. He is a mobbed up hit man and that's the cold hard truth. And, if I really was sane, I would not be happy to share my home and life with a criminal like Jason...but.." her voice got softer "he's a good dad. Did you know that? And he's really very thoughtful and caring and sensitive. And he knows how to have fun. Who would ever think I'd like riding motorcycles or shooting pool? But I do. Still, right is right, and its only right that I do not hurt my daughter when we are..finally...close after a lifetime of being separated and then enemies and then just related but not close...now we are close. We're close, Jax. I can't lose my daughter. You understand, right?"

He walked over to her and gently touched her arm. "I don't think Sam would ever let you lose her. No matter what happens."

"Really?"

"Would I lie to you?"

Alexis shook her head no. "But-!"

"She values the bond you two have grown."

"I know. But-"

"She knows you're a great mom and she really admires you. She loves you- unconditionally."

"But no child wants to hear that their mother is now dating their ex. I'm sorry but that is reality and I can't live in delusions like some people who....we know...you're married to. I can't be all 'Only what I want to matter, matters.' Because that isn't hardly true. Sam has every right to be really angry about this. If anything...I should have waited till she came home before further pursuing anything with Jason. That would have shown I respected her desires and her place in my life. But I didn't! Instead I've gone and fallen for the same man she used to want to marry. Am I the worst mother on earth?"

"Of course not. You're an amazing mom and, deep down, you know that. Now, this thing with Jason, that baffles me. I was the happiest guy in town when Sonny married Gia-"

Alexis rolled her eyes but smiled, slightly.

Jax went on "Seriously, why do you think I went to his wedding with Kate that time? Not because I like the guy. That's for sure. And not because Kate was a work associate. It was because I wanted to see with my own eyes that he was married to someone other than you. That you would never fall into a trap of thinking he is a good, honorable man who you can build a life with-"

"Please don't put down Sonny right now. I have too much going on this week to be mad at you too. Besides you know I can't stand it when we fight."

"All I'm saying is, I thought we dodged this, proverbial, bullet when Sonny got married again. I didn't even think you'd look twice at Jason. But you have. Now that you have....tell me....what is it that makes you want a man like him? Just because he's fun? There has to be more. Tell me what else you see in him that you can't find in a doctor or lawyer or janitor or....anyone. I know lots of single men I could set you up with. Tell me why it has to be Jason."

"Does it matter anymore? I don't believe that Sam will be able to live with this."

"Give her some credit. She's matured in ways that we never expected. Hasn't she?"

"She really has!"

"Exactly. She's a good sister to the girls, and a good partner to Spinelli, and she's going to be a good wife to Matt. Why shouldn't you believe that when she looks in your eyes and see how badly you want her blessing...she won't jump at the chance to give it? That's the Sam I know."

"Aw," Alexis said, hugging Jax. "You are such a good best person!"

"And you are a fantastic mom. But even fantastic moms get to date. I just wish it was someone else."

"I say that about you and your choice in a wife every day," Alexis said, with a smile on her lips as she kept hugging Jax.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

An hour later, Alexis was sitting at a table in the dining room of The Metro Court, waiting on Sam to show up for dinner. Sam was already late. Alexis was sipping a glass of wine and reading over a case file.

Her cell buzzed. She looked at the screen and let out a short breath. "Hello."

"Do you have time to talk?" Jason asked.

"I have a few minutes. How are you?"

There was a long silence. "I don't want to make anything harder on you. But before you talk to Sam I just want you to know that we have nothing to be ashamed about or apologize for."

"Hopefully she sees it that way too."

"You'd...walk away from me?"

Alexis had already told him she would but his voice showed how much he wanted that to not be true.

She let out a shuddering breath. "I wouldn't want to. I wouldn't be happy about it."

"You'll make your choice and I'll respect that choice. I will never make you feel guilty about what you decide. Just understand...." Jason cleared his throat. "I make love to you. When we're together....I'm falling in love with you...a little more...every time I see you. And if I had it my way....no other man would ever touch you again."

"Jason-" she said, breathlessly, as she heard him hang up. "Jason? Jason?"

The phone buzzed again. The screen read: General Hospital.

Like any mother would feel, her heart jumped into her throat. "This is Alexis Davis speaking."

"Alexis, this is Patrick," he sounded like he could barely get the words out. "There was an accident...on the expressway...when Matt and Sam were coming home. They were airlifted here. You need to get here as soon as you can."

Her hand covered her mouth. _No! Not my baby girl,_ she thought. _Not my baby....oh my God, Samantha._


	62. jason and alexis, twenty eight

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 28**

Patrick choked out the words "There was an accident...on the expressway...when Matt and Sam were coming home. They were airlifted here. You need to get here as soon as you can."

Alexis covered her mouth with her hand, as tears stung her eyes, and her whole body tensed.

Patrick said "I need your permission for a surgery. I'll explain everything when you get here."

"Just do it! Save my daughter," she said, frantically, as she jumped to her feet.

"I intend to," Patrick choked out, before hanging up.

Alexis didn't know what to do. Who to call first. What to think. She couldn't think straight. All she could see in her head was herself holding Sam right after she was born. Their most precious moment together ever. Her perfect baby girl.

Alexis stumbled across the dining room at The Metro Court and over to the bar. She asked the bartender "Can you...page Mr. Jacks...to the lobby for me?" Before he could even respond she was rushing to the elevators.

Jax walked into the lobby as she walked off the elevator. She hurried over to him, touching his arm, and looking into his eyes. She whispered, hoarsely, "There was an accident...Sam."

He sucked in a quick, broken breath. "Lets go."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Where's Jason?" Carly asked, shocked, as she looked around the surgical waiting room. Jax had called her after they were told that Sam would be in surgery for a few hours.

Alexis' whole face was pinched, as she stopped pacing and turned to look at Carly. Fresh tears flew to her eyes. She shook her head slightly. Saying that she hadn't called him. She hadn't known how to let down that wall and lean on him that way.

Carly's features softened. She slipped off her purse and coat, threw them on a chair and then walked over to Alexis.

Alexis whispered "No pity from you please. I can't take it today."

Carly hugged her, tighter than she ever thought about hugging her before. "They don't make chicks tougher than Sam."

Alexis raised her arms and hugged Carly back, as teams streamed down her face.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Twenty minutes later, Alexis was standing outside the hospital. She had went to the bathroom to wash her face and, even though Jax said he would do it, she decided she needed to call Nikolas, who was in Russia on business.

Though it might be better to wait till Sam came out of surgery she felt like she needed to know he was coming home right now. Sam needed all the love and prayers and family she could get.

Cassadines united could never be broken apart.

"Aunt Alexis, how are you?"

"I hate to have to tell you this but your cousin....Sam...she's been hurt in car accident with Matt. She's in surgery. " She swallowed down a sob as her chest rattled.

"I am so sorry to hear that. What can I do for you? Who's her doctor? Can I make some calls to get a specialist?"

"Patrick is her doctor. He's the best."

"Yes, he is. Are you holding in all right?"

Alexis sniffled. "I'll be fine."

"I'm heading to the airport as soon as we hang up. I love you, Aunt Alexis."

"I love you, too," she whispered, her throat raw from crying. She turned around, at the sound of foot steps, and saw Jason approaching. "Good bye, Nikolas."

"Stay strong."

"I will."

"Good bye, Aunt Alexis."

She hung up, just as Jason stopped in front of her. Their eyes met and held. She opened her mouth to speak but only a sound came out, not a word. She meant to say: I'm fine.

Jason eased her into his arms. Alexis was shaking. Jason murmured to her "I won't leave you. Not for a minute."

She clung to him. And, in that moment, she could feel all her walls crash down as she flooded with a rush of undeniable love for this man who was the such a surprise in her life story. Such a miracle, so late in the game, too.

Jason Morgan-hit man, father, brother, best friend, mentor.....heartbreaker.....healer, lover, friend. Her man.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Gia was loving every moment of this weekend out on her brand new, stunning, yatch with her hot, powerful, sexy as sin, husband. She sat on the bow of the boat, in a bikini, letting the cool breeze brush over her, as she watched the sun fall down.

Sonny was cooking dinner below deck.

Her cell started going off.

"Damn it. That better not be work. I will cut a biacth," she joked, as she crawled back onto the deck, went over to her beach bag, and reached inside to get her phone.

She read the screen: M.

Emily.

The phone had stopped ringing. She checked her messages and heard "Hey. There's no easy way to say this so brace yourself.....Sam has been brought into the ER after a four car accident. Both her and Matt are critical. She's in surgery and will be for a few hours. Alexis is here....she could probably use him right about now and I know...you'd want to know that."

Gia's eyes closed for a moment. She dropped the phone back in her purse. Walking on her wedge sandals, she made her way downstairs. The smell of tomato sauce permeated the air.

Hearing her approach, he called over his shoulder, in a light, teasing voice "You missed me, right? Don't worry I'm just about done here and then we can eat and...I was thinking...go to bed early." He chuckled.

"Babe."

He turned around. His eyes darkened with worry.

Gia said "We have to go back to the marina-"

"You sick?" He moved close to her.

"No, I'm good. I just heard from Emily. Sam was taken to General Hospital. Her and Matt were in a car wreck and its....bad. Sam's in critical condition. Alexis is there and she needs you."

Sonny froze. Gia touched his arm. Before she could do or say anything he was jerking his phone out of his pocket. He tried to make a call. "Fuck! I don't have a signal down here. FUCK!"

He headed upstairs.

Gia walked over to the stove and turned off the burner. She went to change her clothes. On deck Sonny got a signal and dialed his phone.

"Hello. I thought you were going to be out of touch all weekend?"

"Ric, there's a family emergency. You didn't hear?"

Ever since the day they learned that either one of them might be the father to Claudia's baby, Sonny and Ric had forged a deeper bond, built in pain over all that woman did to both of them.

"No," panic flew into his tone. "Is it one of the girls?"

"Its Sam. She's been in a car accident."

"How bad is it? Does Alexis know? Is she at the hospital? Is Sam even in town? I thought she was on her honeymoon still."

"Sam's at General Hospital. Alexis is there already. And its not looking good, from what I hear. I want you to-"

"Nadine and I were in the middle of dinner at The Cosmopolitan but we'll leave right now. Someone should be with Alexis."

"Just listen to me, I want you to go to the lake house and get the girls. Take them to your place. They should be with you, not Viola, tonight. Don't tell them anything!"

"What about Alexis? Who's with her? Jason? There's no way he can be what she needs right-"

"Don't start with that shit! I'm on my way to the hospital. You just do what I said. Go get the girls. I don't want them to hear about their sister's death on the fucking news when they are with a baby sitter!......Can you do that for me or not?"

"Of course I can, Sonny."

"Take care of the girls for Alexis. That's what you can do for her, little brother."

"I will. Keep me updated."

"Yeah."

"She's been through so much."

"I gotta go." Sonny hung up and then dropped his head as he muttered "Damn it. Damn. Damn."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hours went by, and then finally, Sonny was walking into the surgical waiting room, with Gia just a step behind him. In there was Carly, Jax, Jason, Maxie, Spinelli, Lulu, Diane and Alexis.

She was standing by herself, staring out a window, with her hands clutched tightly together.

"Hey," Sonny said, in this deep soothing tone.

She kept staring out the window, though the way she visibly shivered showed that she heard him come in. Everyone else was hushed.

He nodded at Jason, cast a quick look at Carly, and then walked over to Alexis. Sonny touched her arm. "Still waiting for news?"

"Its been a very long surgery. That can't be a good sign."

"It's a great sign, counselor. She's fighting."

Alexis stared into Sonny's eyes for a long moment. Then she jerked her gaze over to Gia. "Thank you for coming down here. That was a very considerate thing to do. I'm sorry about ruining your weekend like this."

Gia told her "Forget about that. We wouldn't want to be there when we need to be here. Can I get you anything?"

"I'm fine. But thank you."

Gia said "Well, I could use coffee myself. What about you guys? Carly? Want to make a caffeine run with me?"

"I'm in," Carly said. She looked at Jason and then Jax. "Can we bring you back anything?"

They both shook their heads, no. Diane asked them to get her a drink. Lulu, Maxie and Spinelli were too upset to say anything at all. They had been through the gambit of emotions and now just sat there looking and feeling numb.

After Gia and Carly left, Sonny said to Alexis "Come on. Sit down."

"I don't want to sit down! I want my daughter to LIVE! Don't coddle me! I'M FINE!"

Jax jumped up. "Get away from her, Corinthos!"

Jason stood up and physically blocked Jax's path to Alexis. He glared at him.

Alexis fell into Sonny's arms. She whispered "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scream at you."

"I got you. Its okay."

Jax stormed out of the room, letting out a disgusted sigh. Jason sat back down. It wasn't easy to stay there- knowing how connected Alexis was to Sonny and feeling like he was watching an intimate moment between them- but he wasn't leaving her side. No matter what.


	63. jason and alexis, twenty nine

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 29**

"I'd like to go to the chapel,"Alexis said.

Everyone else in the surgical waiting room looked at her. Diane said "I'd be happy to go with you."

"Thank you but I'd like to go with Jason."

Jason stood up. He reached out his hand to Alexis. She took his hand and they left the room.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Earlier that night, Nadine had run off the elevator. She spotted Epiphany behind the nurses station. Betrayal raged in Nadine's eyes. She had to hear about Matt being injured because Ric got a call from Sonny.

"HOW DARE YOU NOT CALL ME!"

"Nurse Crowell-"

"Where is he? Where's his chart?" Nadine went behind the nurse's station and started grabbing the charts that were there. "I don't see it. Where is it?"

"Dr. Hunter is in recovery room one. I did order Nurse Thompson to phone you, hours ago, and she assured me she left a message on your home phone."

"You should have paged me!" She tried to leave the nurses station but Epiphany was standing there."Get out my way."

"We've been slammed here because of a four car pile up with twelve victims. I should have

thought-"

Tearfully, Nadine screeched "That's right you should have! I'm his _In Case of Emergency _number. ME! And when I find his file I'm gonna show you and then you're gonna see that I'm the first call you make when anything happens to Matthew. Now move out of my way before you force me to move you."

Epiphany stepped aside. "I'm truly sorry you didn't get the message earlier."

She ran down the hall. Eventually Nadine spotted Liz, in surgical wear, standing with Lucky and Emily. Nadine stopped short, panting breathlessly.

Liz said "He's awake but weak. He suffered internal bleeding from a ruptured spleen. We had to remove it. He's stabilized now. Vitals are strong."

"And Sam?"

"Patrick is still in surgery with her. The last update was that she coded on the table but they got her back."

"I want to see him." Nadine said, she rushed past them, to go wash her hands, put on a gown and mask, so that the recovery room would stay sterile.

When she was ready, as a little calmer, she walked there, looked through the window and saw Noah in there with Matt. Noah's eyes met hers. She watched him say her name to Matt and then Noah walked into the hall.

Noah looked years older. The fear had obviously gotten to him. Noah said "He says for to tell you that you should relax. He's tougher than he looks."

Nadine's chest swelled with a sob but she swallowed it down. The tears were from relief. Nodding at Noah, she went inside. She sniffled. Moving close to the bed she looked down at Matt. "What did I tell you? Drive slower. You never listen to me. That's your biggest problem."

"Its...Patrick..that...speeds. Wrong Drake brother."

"No, I have the right Drake brother. Its this one who is my best friend."

"Yep....hey, no crying."

"I love you, Matthew! You are my bestest best friend. I'd never be happy without you in my life. But I will be happy now because you're okay and.....guess what, Matthew...I got engaged."

"Yeah?"

"So you have to get better quick so you can stand up for me. You owe me. And I'd never forgive you if you welched on your promise to pay me back for being in your wedding."

"I'll be there."

"I'm sorry I wasn't here when you woke up. Its good that Noah was around."

"Glad...you're here...now."

"Me too." She stayed there with him for hours, even after he drifted back to sleep, just staring at the third man she ever wanted to marry.

First there was Bruce, then Nikolas (though she could see that was silly now), and then there was this man- her best friend- with his dark, messy hair that he gelled too much, and his sometimes scruffy bread, and his sweet brown eyes and his gruff, stubborn nature.

God could not have Matthew back tonight. Nadine still needed him too fiercely.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis lit a candle in the chapel. Closing her eyes she remember the first time she ever heard Sam cry. "She was a loud baby. I only knew her for a few minutes but she was already...feisty. That gave me some peace of mind because I knew she'd be tough when she got older. And...she is. She's the strongest Cassadine ever born."

"Sam thinks that about you."

Alexis turned and looked at Jason, where he sat in a pew. "Its remarkable how she has grown up this last year. I remember when she was in a hot tub with Jerry and I was so frustrated with her. Of course I knew it wasn't romantic but she shouldn't have tried to take him down on her own that way. She's incredibly headstrong though. She comes by it honestly. I wish I could say that I helped her to grow up but it was all Matt. She came into her own when she fell in love with him." Alexis walked over and sat next to Jason. "I should have trusted that Sam would be mature enough to deal with this now. She's not that reactive woman she used to me. She swore that after she nearly lost Matt because of going behind his back to Nadine...that she would never act first and think later. I was still treating her like the kid I met years ago. But she's a woman now....she was so excited about finding a surrogate. She sent me a email full of names for babies. All mouthfuls. My grand kids would have been ten before they could write out their whole name."

"They could still be born, you know."

"Of course."

Jason took her hand and rubbed his thumb over the back of it.

Alexis raised there joined hands and kissed his hand. "You're my rock, you know that, right?"

In truth he wondered if she needed Jax more or Sonny or Diane or Nikolas, but the honesty in her voice convinced Jason that she truly was relying on him. "I won't leave you."

"I know." Their eyes held for a long moment until Alexis finally whispered "I won't give you up."

His chest got tight as he stared into her eyes.

Alexis paused and then went on "I believe in Sam now...that she will understand...and I believe she's going to make it....and I believe in my grand kids with their four names and that they will be born one day....and most of all....I believe in you, Jason."

She leaned against him. Their heads touched. The moment lingered, filled with overwhelming emotion, and then Alexis whispered "And I don't care that its just been two weeks."

Jason smiled slightly. He placed two fingers under her chin and titled her head up. "I love you, Alexis."

Her eyes searched his for a long moment.

He finally said "Don't say anything back right now. Just know...how I feel about you."

Her breathing was very shallow when she told him. "Okay.....and you should just know....you're the one, Jason. Just know that."

His lips joined with hers and she could feel, rather than see, that his eyes were teary at her revelation.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sonny paced the hallway.

He was not holding up well. He felt completely out of control. How damn long could one surgery take? And brain surgery! Why, for God's sake, did it always come down to brain surgery in his life?

What if Sam died? Then how would Sonny take care of Alexis when he was now married to Gia.

Gia was a good woman who put up with so damn much from him. And she did it all with a smile and a flirty line and jokes and quiet strength.

She would tell him quick how beautiful she was and how lucky he was to be with a beautiful woman like her. But she never really traded on that beauty anymore. She won people over with her huge heart. She was sweet to all his friends and family and the men who worked for him.

And she was kick ass, spine of steel, when it came to the business. Gia Campbell-Corinthos. Sexiest woman alive and his wife.

Yet she knew and he knew that if Sam didn't make it, all the cards were off the table. He'd have to be there for Alexis, whatever that meant. Late nights and as much as she needed. He'd have to stop holding back his heart and just let her see all she meant to him. Because she'd need that and more to survive.

He couldn't be selfish and just give her what was easiest. He wouldn't be that jackass this time.

Sonny stalked to the nurses station. "Page Dr. Robin Scorpio for me."

"She's in the OR right now."

"Then page Dr. Monica Quatermaine!"

"I'm sorry but she's not working today."

He let out a frustrated breath. "I need to know about a patient who Dr. Drake is working on."

"Are you family?"

"You listen to me! I want an update on Samantha McCall and I want it right now. You recognize me, right?"

"Yes, Mr. Corinthos."

"Good. Then stop playing games and get me an update."

"Let me see here," the nurse typed into the computer. "She's Dr. Hunter's new wife so...there it is Samantha Hunter- Drake. OR 5. I'll call up there. Hold on."

Just then Gia walked over to Sonny. She placed her hands on his shoulders and massaged them. "Babe. We'll know when Patrick is done. You can threaten every nurse in this place to within an inch of their lives and it won't change the fact that the surgery will take as long as it takes. I know Sam and she's as tough as they come. Seriously. You've seen her when she loses it. Watch out. Remember that time you told her she was a bad influence on Kristina?" Gia chuckled softly. "You are lucky to be alive still. Do you really think that a woman like her won't make it?"

Sonny relaxed visibly.

The nurse hung up the phone. "Dr. Drake should be in the waiting room soon to let you know the patient's condition."


	64. jason and alexis, thirty

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 30**

Alexis sat by Sam's bedside, determined to be the first person her daughter saw when she woke up, even though Patrick said she would be sedated for at least two days. Until the sedation was removed there was no way Sam could wake up.

Still, for now, Alexis just sat there, staring at her beautiful daughter who had bandages around her head, and praying for miracles. They couldn't be sure what would happen to Sam for a few days still.

She might lose some of all of her memory when she woke up.

Alexis was worried about their bond just disappearing into thin air, and Sam losing her love for Matt, and a million other worries, but most of all she just wanted her daughter to survive. The rest they would deal with in time.

XXXXXXXXXX

Jason stood outside of Sam's room in the ICU. He could see Alexis through the glass. He promised not to leave her and he wouldn't.

She was his woman now. And he would take care of her the best he could. He was glad she seemed to now be ready to let him do that for her.

Carly came walking up to him. They hugged. She pulled back. Her eyes were light with happiness. There were reacting to what she saw resting in Jason's own eyes, and he knew that. Through the worry, there was also an overwhelming relief that filled him. And a joy.

Alexis had confessed to having deep feelings for him, earlier in the chapel, and that made Jason believe that she truly was as invested in them as he was.

"Jase?"

He nodded.

She hugged him again. And that's how Carly found out that Alexis loved Jason back.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Nadine refused. She just flat out, dog gone, refused to take part in Matthew's foolishness. She was tempted- oh so tempted- by his big, brown, puppy dog eyes and his soft, halting, weak, begging tone.

But she had the sense God gave her and she was not being a party to his scheme.

Patrick, on the other hand, was just a sucker for his younger brother. A gosh darn sucker. And so, even though Matt was weak and full of stitches, in the middle of the night, after Matt woke up again, while Nadine was sitting there and threatening to put Matt in restraints, Patrick gave in to Matt and helped him into a wheel chair.

So Matt could go see Mrs. Hunter- Drake.

Matt was doped up on pain medication but he still winced with every move he made. They found Alexis and Jason in Sam's room.

Alexis stood up and said to Matt "Its so good to see you awake and looking so well."

"You call this well?" Matt joked, weakly.

"We'll leave you alone for a moment," Alexis said.

Patrick pushed Matt close to the bed. "You okay?"

"Good."

"You sure?"

"Stop....fussing..over me, Drake."

Everyone went into the hall. Matt took Sam's hand. "Hey, beautiful......we hit a...little bad luck, huh?"

After a moment he said "Please don't leave me. Think about Daniel...Davis..Hunter-Drake." He coughed, because he had bruised ribs that made it hard for him to breath. "Dream about Daniel...and get strong. Then wake up....so we can have...our son."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

In the hallway, Jason and Alexis were holding hands, and making small talk with Patrick and Nadine about Lucia being home from the hospital, when Nikolas rounded the corner.

"Aunt..." his eyes went to Jason's hand holding Alexis. He cleared his throat. "Uh....how is Sam?"

Alexis let go of Jason's hand and walked over to Nikolas. "She made it through the surgery and now we have to wait a few days until they try to wake her up. She needs time to heal. But she's hanging on for us."

He nodded. "Thank God....can I speak to you alone?"

Alexis followed him around the corner. Nikolas asked her "Are you okay? I wish I could have gotten here sooner. There was a storm in Paris with high winds and we had to refuel there. It caused a delay."

"Thank you for rushing home."

"Of course. Where are the girls? Do you want me to bring them to Wyndermere?"

"Sonny sent them over to Ric's. They'll be fine. I'm sure you are wondering about what is the nature of my relationship with Jason."

"I wouldn't dare intrude on your privacy that way. Especially tonight. I just hope you are aware of what you are doing. And I pray..." he whispered the last part "this is not the same sort of situation as when you entangled yourself with Jerry."

"Its not. I'm not trying to secure a conviction on Jason. In fact, I'm his lawyer now."

"So this is more similar to the relationship you had with Sonny then?"

"Not exactly. No. Its different but its real. It is real, Nikolas, and Jason will, hopefully, be in my life for a long time to come. I still have to tell Sam all this but I believe that I will get that chance and she will support me. And I hope I have your support too."

He let out a breath. "I am not fan of the mob element that is in this city but I am your greatest fan....and you'll always have whatever it is I can give you, including my support of all your choices."

Alexis hugged Nikolas. "Please pray for your cousin."

"I've been praying non-stop for hours now."

XXXXXXXXX

Nikolas made the hospital staff give Alexis a room to sleep in. She kicked off her shoes and lay on the bed.

Jason said "Get some rest. I'll be right here." He sat down in a nearby chair.

She patted the spot on the bed next to her. "It will be a little cramped but....I'd rather you be right here."

Jason took off his boots. His jacket was thrown over the back of the chair. He took his gun and set it on the table bedside the bed. Then he lay next to Alexis, letting her head rest on his chest.

And he felt whole.

There were pieces of his heart that were shattered. There were things he could never make right. There was pain that would never end. A son that belonged to Lucky. Michael not calling Jason "Daddy" now or ever again. The lost of Lila and his baby with Courtney. The lost of his father. His brother.

Brenda wouldn't move home and he didn't have the guts to ask her to. Part of his being noble. Pretending he didn't need his friend there with him.

Never finding a way to open his heart enough to reunite with Carly. The way he hurt Sam when he dumped her. The fantasy that never became reality with Liz.

So many broken pieces.

But when he was there with Alexis he didn't think of all that. It existed and it always would. Instead he thought of how good it felt to hold her. How right. How she slipped into his life and made it a better life. Made his world a better world.

Made him smile. Made him hope.

There were times before he considered hope the worst of the four letter words. And nothing that a man like him should waste his time on.

Now he was filled with hope again. And it was all because Alexis came up to a hotel room- when she was scared to open her heart- and opened her heart to him fearlessly. She might not have admitted it then. Admitted she was letting him into her heart. But she was. She wasn't nervous with him ever and she wasn't hyperventilating. She was brave, strong, sexy and exciting in every way.

She changed his life. Jason didn't want to look back on how he felt before he first kissed Alexis. All that blackness that was eating him alive. He wanted to look ahead. At the wild, crazy, intense, emotional, good life they were building.

His hand rubbed her back. "Rest, okay? They'll let us know if Sam needs you."

"This has been such a hard day. And so was yesterday. Yesterday I thought I might lose you. And today I thought I might lose my daughter. But now I believe I can't lose either of you. You fought for us, Jason. Thank you."

She gave him a soft kiss and repeated "Thank you."

He gave her a very short and tender kiss. "I'll fight till I have no fight left in me....for you...us...our life, Alexis."

Her eyes searched his. "I believe you."

He gave her a very small smile. "Go ahead and go to sleep. I'll be holding you when you wake up."

(You've got someone here who wants to make it all right.

Someone that loves you more than life right here.

.

You've got willing arms

that'll hold you tight.

.

A hand to lead you

on through the night right here.

.

I know your heart can get all tangled up inside.

Don't you keep it to yourself.

.

When your long day is over-

and you can barely drag your feet-

the weight of the worldis on your shoulders,

I know what you need.

.

Bring it on home to me) (Little Big Town)


	65. jason and alexis, the epilogue

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**September 2010**

**Instant Addiction**

**Part 31**

**Epilogue**

**July 2013**

**Three Years Later**

She told him she was past her baby making years. And he seemed all right with that.

Still there was really no better moment they ever shared- despite all their hot sex that they had on the regular- then when she was freaking out and yelling "Go get a test! I can not believe my life sometimes. I really can not. Knocked up in the middle of a murder trial!"

Shaking his head and smiling, but trying hard not to, he roared off on his motorcycle to go to the drug store.

Now they stood out in their yard surrounded by people they loved. The mansion they bought had seven bedroom suites- all decorated by Carly with Maxie as her helper- a huge pool (great for skinny dipping when the kids were away) and a basketball court. It also had high stone walls and gaurds surrounding it.

But such was life for mobsters and Cassadines.

Their neighbors were Kate Howard and her live-in boyfriend, Taggert Campbell, who hadn't mellowed to Sonny or Jason a bit over the years. Next to him lived his sister Gia Campbell- Corinthos and Sonny. Down the block was Amanda Barrington, divorced again this year, with her three kids. Skye Chandler Quartermaine kept her maiden name after she married Mac Scorpio. He liked his little house where he raised his girls but she felt Felicia was around every corner inside those walls. So they raised Lila Rae in a mansion instead. Lila was more the mansion type anyway. It seemed that she inherited quite a bit of her cousin's Sage's personality- which wasn't all that different than Lila's mother had been once upon a time.

Jason didn't really associate with the neighbors- besides Sonny- but Alexis was more aware of how they needed a village to raise their kids. She was just glad Carly never moved into their gated neighborhood.

Jax built Carly a huge house on the edge of town that was so fancy it had magazine editors begging to do photo shoots in it.

All of those neighbors and Jason and Alexis' family- including Liz, Patrick, Cameron, Emma, Jake, Lucky and his wife Serena- were on the lawn that day to celebrate the second birthday of James Stefanovich Davis-Morgan.

James was in honor of Jason's father- Alan James- and the middle name honored Alexis' brother.

At present, James- who they called, simply, J- was playing with Maggie Jay, who was now four years old, and Lucia Zacchara, who was three, and Toni Lansing, who was four. At that moment, two year old Daniel Hunter-Drake toddled over and, out of no where, beat J over the head.

J wailed "DADDY!"

All the adults turned to look at the scene. Gia chuckled. "What a sucker punch that was." She was in charge of keeping an eye on the kids while they played. "Break it up, boys, and play nice."

Since Jason was inside of the house, Spinelli and Michael, who were nearby, stepped in before Daniel beat on J again. Being born just days apart seem to cement they fact that J and Daniel would forever love each other deeply and fight with each other fiercely.

Spinelli picked up Daniel. "Sailor Boy, you know better. No hitting."

Michael picked up J. "You okay, little man?"

J's little face was red. His lips quivered. "Danny mean!"

Michael carried Daniel inside and went looking for Jason. If he was sad or scared, his father was who he cried for. But if he was sick or hungry, it was his mom.

Danny laid his head on Michael's shoulder. His little hands had sand stuck to them because they were sticky from having chocolate candy, given to the kids by Molly.

Michael found Jason in the kitchen, talking to Carly. They both shook their heads when Michael said "Danny hit him again."

"DADDY!" J reached out his hands for his father.

Jason took the child. "You're all right."

"Me no like him."

Carly smirked. "Danny is so lucky that J didn't get the crazy Cassadine lethal gene. Or at least we haven't seen that killer instinct yet. I think he's more like Spencer. Calm and patient. But Danny better watch out. You never know when J will get fed up and really sock him one back. Isn't that right, little man? He'll be sorry then."

Jason smiled and told her "Don't encourage him to fight, please."

Carly just smiled at him. She loved seeing him with a baby in his arms. She reached out and ruffled Michael's hair. The first baby in their family- and now he was just about a man. "You need a cut."

"Aw, Mom, lay off."

XXXXXXXXXXX

"MOM!" Sam squealed as she dropped her cell in her purse. She was waiting in the bedroom for Alexis to come out of the bathroom.

Kristina was in there too. They had all been having one of their girl talks that happened often. Especially since Kristina was now interested in dating and she needed plenty of guidance.

Kristina said "Oh my God, that was Hannah on the phone, wasn't it?"

"Wait for it," Sam said.

Alexis came out of the bathroom. "Was that my name I heard being screamed at the top of your lungs?"

"YES!"

"Just checking."

Sam jumped off the bed. "I just heard from Hannah and she took a test and....your second grandchild is on the way."

All three Davis girls hugged and jumped around. Molly walked in. "Hmpf. You leave me out of everything!"

They all broke into laughter, at her very serious and pissed off tone. Molly stomped away. Sam went after her and soon all the Davis women where heading downstairs to surprise Matt with the good news. They teased him mercilessly about getting gray hairs and getting bags under his eyes- from getting no sleep because of taking care of Daniel- and about wearing a purse, the diaper bag, and about competing with Patrick over who had the smarter child.

Then Sam told him "And its only going to get twice as bad now....since we have another baby coming in eight months. I just got off the phone with Hannah. Congratulations, Daddy."

That smile Matt gave her, the boyish grin, made all four Davis women's heart flip over. Matt said, in an awed tone,"Wow."

"Wow, I know!" Sam said.

Then he picked her up and spun her around. Damian Davis Hunter-Drake was now on the way. That would be the name of their baby if it was a boy or a girl. But Sam and Matt planned to keep a secret that they had already decided on that name for their second child until the baby was born. That way Spinelli could be holding his namesake when he learned the news. Now both the Hunter- Drake babies would be named for Sam's brothers.

XXXXXXXXXX

Laying on her stomach, on their bed, with just a pair of black panties on, late that night, Alexis moaned "Such a long day."

Jason was giving her a back massage. "It went good."

"I saw that you got a chance to play catch with Jake. That's good."

"Jake has a pretty good arm on him already."

"Mmm," she said as he massaged her lower back. "You are so good to me, hubby."

Jason kissed her shoulder. "Want to be good to me back?"

"Hmmm....let me think....I guess I can be persuaded." Alexis sat up and wrapped her arms around his neck. She brought her mouth to his and kissed him with just as much intensity and fire as they kissed on the night they got married.

Jason pressed her back onto the bed, yanked off her underwear, and then kissed her again. His mouth left her lips and worked over her jaw ,then her neck-finding that spot that made her arch against him- and then lower. He captured a nipple in his mouth.

Alexis sucked in a blissful breath between her teeth. "I thought it was my turn to be good to you."

"You are."

Soon he was sucking on her clit, as his fingers drove into her, and she bit back her scream. They had gotten good at quietly making love but they still let loose when they kids weren't around. The guards were used to it by now.

When he slid into her tonight, he kissed her passionately, with a sweet tenderness that thanked her for this beautiful life she made for them. He still loved the way it felt to be buried deep inside of her tight, hot, slick walls. He sped up his speed eventually as he roughly worked her nipple between his fingers.

Alexis whispered "Fuck, that's good, Jason."

He knew it was. They were always good together. That was why he was addicted to his wife.

(You know

I know you like the back of my hand.

You know

I'm gonna do all that I can right here.

Gonna lie with you till you fall asleep

the morning comes I'm still gonna be

right here.

Yes, I am) (Little Big Town)

**THE END**

Note- Jake Martin Spencer still calls Lucky 'Dad'. He is aware his biological father is Jason but he does not have visitation. Still he gets along with Jason when he is allowed to see him. His step-father is Patrick Drake.

Sam woke up from her coma a few days after the last chapter ended. Alexis did not have to tell her about Alexis dating Jason because Maxie had already called Sam- during Sam's honeymoon- and let it slip out. Sam was shocked at first but Maxie talked her down and after a few minutes Sam laughed it off. She decided it was quite ironic how things turned out. For a gag gift she joked she would make a shirt that said My Mom Dates My HitMan Ex-Boyfriend on the front and on the back it would say And You Thought Your Family Was Fucked Up?

Thanks for reading Instant Addiction. It was a blast to work on.


	66. For The Taking, Clic

This is the sequel to the first story in this collection. Its not mature.

I am working on a new Jaslexis story.

Heat- For three months Alexis Davis was his defense attorney while he was on trail for murder. And for everyday of those three months Jason Morgan wanted to fuck her. Now that his is out of jail, its time to make his fantasies into his reality.

**Clic, AU, Sequel to An Unequal AttractionFor the Taking**

This comes as a surprise to her.

Him standing behind her in this dimly lit hotel bar. His silky, deep voice betraying his heart even with the first words he says. Because it is not in the words but in his tone that she hears his longing for her. That is not what she wants to hear it. Not at all. Because it just might inspire longing in Claudia can't have that.

She slides her hand off his brother's thigh. She came back home to deal with her nutcase father who went and got himself paralyzed. Merry Christmas to her. In most families, this situation would be a tragedy but for a Zacchara it is simply an opening. She has wanted to come back for awhile. See her little brother. Run the family business the right way. But her father didn't want her around. Well he couldn't stop her now, could he?

The only thing that could wreck her plans was letting her head get caught up on anything but business. She knew she would see Ric again, that his father, Trevor, still worked for her father, Anthony- as he had since the beginning of time. She just didn't expect to run into Ric her first night home.

She listens as Sonny and Ric spar back and forth over her.

The men act like little boys, throwing around jabs that all sound like _Mommy loved you more_ and then, ever so slowly, she turns and faces the only man who ever really got under her skin. Her reaction is not the practiced one she wanted to give. Its not the cool "Richard, its hard to believe you gave up Martha's Vineyard for Port Charles. What a step down."

That response would have only worked if they were alone for she will not give away to Sonny that she shares a pass with Ric. He wants information? Let him scrounge for it like she does.

But worse then the fact that she can not use the lines she wanted to is that her mind shuts down nearly completely when his dark eyes settle on hers. The world stops moving. She's sixteen. They are in a pool house. She's smirking cause its obvious he's never felt this good before and that makes her feel powerful. She holds him in her hands. She rules his world. Out of her mouth pops the greeting she always gave him back then "Hey there, you."

"Hey you."

Damn it all to hell. She is Claudia freaking Zacchara and there is no man on the whole damn planet who can make her lose it. Except there is. And he's standing in front of her staring her down.

Sonny seems on to them. Freaking lovely. Damn Ric. Damn him for moving to Port Charles. Damn him for being in her way. Damn him for coming to Milan with that ring...God. It still hurt to think about that. Is it fair for anything to ever hurt for sixteen whole years? How could she let this happen to her? You want to know how? Being seventeen, stoned, horny, angry, stupid, reckless, weak, bitter, crazy, and madly in love all at the same time. That's how.

She was just too young to know better. And she would pay for that for the rest of her days on earth.

By the time she wised up, when she was in Milan, she knew love was for fools and suckers. Her Daddy broke her heart when he banished her from the family home, leaving her with simply no heart left to offer Ric or anyone else. So when Ric said he was coming to visit her in Milan, she made sure he left hating her. Claudia couldn't even remember the name of the man he caught her in bed with. Marco? That might be it. Who can say after so many years? He meant nothing. No one meant anything to her ever again once Anthony was through damaging her.

And no one could ever mean anything to her again. That's how she wanted it at least. But sitting next to Ric in this bar her body is already humming with awareness, and aching with need. Damn it, she is not supposed to need anyone. She certainly shouldn't still be affected by her high school boyfriend.

What kind of bullshit is that?

This is why she hates love. Because of the way it can mess up a person's mind, their plans and tear out their heart and soul. Leave them less. Love is powerful and she did not want its power unleashed on her ever again.

Sonny, with his smarmy smile, cut the night short, leaving them alone. Isn't he such a good guy? He probably left a guard behind to watch them. Claudia would if she was in his place. See what his lawyer had to say to his enemy. Ric settles into the seat next to her. He orders a drink, while she downs hers. She's gonna need more to get through this but any more and she might just drag him upstairs- work this all out between some silk sheets, to hell with what would be good for her. She's always controlled though, always since she left him.

She uses sex to get her something...she can't use sex just to connect to someone she loves. Its not how she works waits a few minutes before he finally asks, his voice his unique mixture of cocky and unsure. No one else sounds like him. No one. Its endearing to her, which she knows is messed up and pathetic, how he is needy but acts confident.

Ric asks "Miss me?"

Claudia breaks out in a smile. She did, she realizes suddenly. She missed feeling like this. Known. She knows all about his dirty little secrets. She's heard the stories through the years. But even if he is insane, even if he will always bend to Sonny's will, even if he is plagued with demons and filled with bitterness, he is still one more thing. The man the makes her feel what she shouldn't and react like she shouldn't and want what she knows she can't have. And the best part about that is, she is all that to him right back. She can just tell by how he looks at her.

"Not as much as you missed me."

He turns his head, smiling at her, as his eyes work up and down her.

She asks "You like?"

"You grew up, that's for sure, Claudia."

"Yes, I did. I grew up to be the only one in charge of my life. I no longer have to live by what my father deems best for his little trouble making daughter."

"I heard about his accident. I'm sorry."

"I'm not."

Ric shakes his head, disbelieving her. "I know you always loved Anthony, whether you liked him or not."

She leans very close to him. "What does love have to do with this? I came home for the business. Not to hold his hand."

"And not to see me, right?"

"Right."

But still her body stays pressed against his arm. They are eye-to-eye. It's the most alive she has ever felt. Better than when he was inside of her when they were teenagers. She knows how rare this is now. She's educated, wiser, she knows what she would be walking away from if she were to give him up

She doesn't have him yet? Doesn't she?

Ric turned his head away from her. Claudia eased back, not offended in the least. She knew what he was doing. Getting his bearings. She was making his head spin. Saying no with her mouth, yes with her eyes. Acting like she could careless.

She wanted to careless. Wanted it so damn bad she could taste it. Claudia Zacchara, the woman who killed to get what she wanted. But how would she kill her hunger for him?

Claudia stood up. Ric's eyes snapped back to her. He asked "Have somewhere to be?"

"Business calls."

"This late?"

"Calling me a liar, Ric?" She doesn't wait for him to answer, as she picks up her red coat. "Pay for my tab."

She loves to boss men around. And its especially thrilling to have that man be Ric again. He stands and takes her coat from her. She turns and takes her coat from him. He helps her into it. He leans close to her. Claudia starts to feel lightheaded.

His mouth brushes her ear as he whispers "It was good to see you, too."

She does not answer him back, does not even smile, she just breathes in and out, while her body shivers in a way it has never before in her life.

Somehow he gets to her worse now that she's older. Claudia walks out. Her guard opens the door of her limo and she climbs in. She sinks into the leather and closes her eyes.

She hates love. She will always hate love. But damn it all to hell she will probably always be in love with him. It didn't end when she was eighteen. She only pressed paused then. Tonight it started again, not missing a beat, the song richer for its age and it something she can give into? Is it even her choice now? She despises the fact that he can flip her world upside down just by being who he is. But he can, he did, he will again. Her world is his for the taking. How in the hell can she deal with that?

**THE END**


	67. Heat, Jason and Alexis, part one

**Author's Note- **Thank you to all the readers of Instant Addiction. Your reviews inspired me to write a new Jaslexis story. All of my Jaslexis stories are dedicated to Ashyen for her support and because she teaches me with her work how to tell fab stories. I feel like you should send your reviews to her because my fanfiction would not exist without her help over the years. Reviewing this story helps to get me excited to write another Jaslexis story down the road so share your thoughts on them and what you'd love to see in future stories. Maybe it will spark The Muse.

**Storyline Note-** Rebecca is Emily, as I can stand no other outcome. Claudia gave birth to Ric's baby. I started this story before she had her miscarriage on GH. Everything else is the same as previously shown on General Hospital except things have happened between June and December that slightly change the canvas.

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon, mature content throughout story**

**Chapter One**

**December 1st, 2009**

**Tuesday**

The feel of her breasts pressed against his chest made the whole damn trial for first degree murder worth the stress and aggravation. Jason had never seen his lawyer get this excited in front of him before. It was hot as fuck.

The second that the jury foreman read "Not guilty," her eyes lit up, as she turned her head to look at him. The moment sizzled with tension. Only they knew that now, with him being free from lock up, they could act on the sexual attraction that had been brewing between them for the last three months.

Three long torturous months where he was stuck in the PCPD jail with most of his time out of his cell spent with her in the interrogation room, going over his case. Hours where he had the chance to really check her out, and decide that he liked what he was seeing in her these days. It didn't take but one or two heated looks at her when she was bending over near him before she started to notice him checking her out. The air changed. It was always charged between them after that. Every small, innocent touch of her hand against any part of him got him hard. Her breathing would get a little shallow. She'd lick her lips. Swallow visibly. Adjust her glasses. Try to pretend she wasn't imagining him naked like he was imagining her.

But her perky hard nipples pressing against her silk blouse told the truth her lips hadn't yet.

Now, twenty minutes after the judge declared him a free man, they had just walked into a small room near the courtroom, because she said she wanted to go over some billing issues with him. But the second the door closed, there she was, throwing her arms around him.

Her eyes danced with happiness. It was more than just the win in court that got her this turned on.

(And she was turned on. He had no doubt about that now).

It was because it was him- not some other random client- that she got off.

Jason enjoyed the feel of Alexis in his arms. The hug was quick though. Too quick for his liking. She jumped back. "Not guilty! Don't you love those words? I know I do!"

Not answering her, his eyes honed in on her with precision focus, as he advanced toward her. Like a hunter stalking prey, he moved on instinct.

With nervous energy replacing her revved up vibe, she stammered "Yes, well, we made one hell of a team, didn't we? But lets not do this again, all right? Right! Murder trials are really draining! Don't you....."

He placed his hands on both her hips.

She gulped. Her brown eyes widened and filled with lust. "Think..so...Jason?"

"Yeah."

And then his mouth pressed against hers. He didn't devour her lips, like he wanted to. Didn't nibble, suck, lick and make love to those perfect plump lips. He kept his self restraint. Because it would be even hotter for him when she was the one to nibble, suck, lick and devour his lips, then thrust her wanton tongue into his mouth, grab his hair and tug on it.

Moan in his mouth like she was dying for him to bend her over the table and take her hard and fast. They could talk later.

He hadn't gotten laid in over a year. He wanted to fuck now. Talk some other time.

God, she smelled so damn good. Like some kind of flower. And her lips were soft. Her breasts hard. Her body trim and her curves ample. Just the way he liked his chicks.

He was liking everything about this chick these days. His nights in lock up were spent fantasizing about getting her pushed up against flat surfaces all over town.

Now he had her alone. Now there were flat surfaces all around. Jason smiled against her lips, and then pulled back.

She was a kick ass lawyer. She kept him out of prison for life. And now she was gonna be the chick who got him hard, naked and happy for the first time in a long ass time.

Alexis.

Yeah. She was just who he wanted in his bed with her legs spread wide for him.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dazed. He had her completely dazed. And from one closed mouth, firm, jerked against his muscled body, kiss.

She had swore to herself she was not going to- absolutely not, under any circumstances- get into some kind of decadent sexual liaison with this murdering, best friends with Carly, ex of her daughter.

One. Two. Three strikes and Jason was out.

There were plenty of other reasons too why Alexis could not possibly-absolutely not, under any circumstances, she could not stress that enough to herself lately- allow herself to take off even one piece of clothing around Jason. There was the fact that her daughters were just now getting in a good place after months of turmoil. Claudia dying just two weeks after giving birth left Molly with a little brother that had no Mommy. Ric had to care for his son alone. Sonny and Kristina bonding again. Sam and Max getting hitched in Vegas out of no where about two weeks after Matt broke up with Sam. He dumped her for Nadine and Sam took it hard. Yet Sam seemed happy with her new husband. Alexis daughters were finally in a good place. They did not need their mother bringing chaos into their lives. There was also the fact that she was a recently disgraced public figure with her own brand new private firm that she was trying to build up a client list on. Lately she was doing well in court. But all her victories would mean less than nothing if she was- once again- linked romantically to a criminal.

Talk about having a bad reputation. Stefan would wonder what happened to her good sense if he could see her now.

But what did Stefan know about being a woman drawn to dangerous, sexually intense, tempting, alluring, mouth watering men? Not a thing.

That was Alexis' cross to bear. How wet she always got over bad boys.

Luckily, in the past, Jason never looked at her twice. That made it easy to ignore him. He was a hitman, for God sake's! If there was any man in town she needed to not get heated up over it was him.

She took his case because she knew she could win. And because no one deserved to sit in prison over Jerry Jacks dying. That man was beyond a menace. She had wanted to kill him herself on more than one occasion. She took Jason's case also because Sonny asked her to. In other words, she became his defense attorney for all the right reasons.

She did not take his case so that they could spend a lot of time alone together, he could notice- for the first time ever- that she was a sexy, skirt wearing, great legs having woman, if she did say so herself.

Because him noticing that could only lead to madness. Total and complete madness. Insanity. She was not about to lose her mind over Jason.

But his kiss. It was breath stealing. And she knew that kiss was just a tease. A way to tell her that, yes, he was going here. Deal with it.

Pointing at him, she said "Don't," then walked around him and out of the room.

She was so dazed, breathless and shivering with desire that she left behind her briefcase. She made it halfway out of the building before she realized and went back.

Jason was gone from the room.

_That's that_, Alexis decided. _He didn't even put up a fight. Of course he didn't. He's not that type of man. He barely says a word most times. And I don't want him to put up a fight for me....its not like I'm going to die or go crazy if I don't find out what it feels like to have him thrusting into me...making my back hit the wall....my breasts in his hands...twisting and tweaking my nipples...those rough, gun holding hands of his.._.

"Alexis."

She jumped as the voice behind her nearly made her hit the ceiling.


	68. Heat,2

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon, mature content**

**Chapter Two**

**December 1st, 2009**

**Tuesday**

Alexis told herself she was glad- very, very relieved actually- more than glad, thrilled, that Jason was not in the room when she went back to get her briefcase at the courthouse. She had spent three months now telling herself that she was simply imagining the sexy looks he started giving her while she was working as his attorney in his first degree murder case.

She hadn't imagined a thing though.

Because the second he was a free man- or actually twenty-two minutes later, to be exact- he had his hands on her hips, her body pulled taut against his, and his lips molded to hers in his opening arguement for why they needed to get naked together.

Not a good idea. A bad idea. A very bad, reckless, life messing up, hot, steamy, seductive, body tingling....okay stop, right there. It was a bad idea. Simply as that. No need to go into detail.

Looking around the empty room, she grabbed her briefcase as her head filled with all the reasons it was so wonderful Jason didn't argue with her when she told him not to kiss her again, quickly followed by her brain turning on her and taunting her with how good it would feel to be taken by a man as dangerous and attractive as him.

A man she could trust more than she ever did Ric or Jerry, because she knew Jason longer and better than she knew them when she first got with them. That would make the sex hotter. Not to mention that Jason, in general, was just on a whole different level than those two. There was something so street about him. He was not to be messed with. Or played with. He wasn't as easy to work as they were. Or as easy to dismiss either. His hands were rougher than theirs...he was more animalistic, she was sure....wilder....she could almost feel his hands on her breasts. Her hot skin burning beneath his manipulations of her nipples.

She bit her bottom lip.

"Alexis."

Jumping slightly, she gasped and spun around, holding her briefcase in front of her chest, in a self defense move to hide her pebbled nipples.

Her eyes grew wide at the sight of who was standing in front of her.

_Great,_ she thought,_ is this not my luck or what? To be all hot and wet and dying to be naked with Jason....right in front of Sonny. Lord, why do You hate me? Why do You do these kind of things to me? Is it because I haven't gone to church on a Sunday in four...scratch that, six....years? I'm very busy. You know that. You know me. Always in court. Always getting tangled up with the wrong man. Being a single mom. Please cut me some slack. This...Sonny being here right now...is just cruel and unusual punishment._

"Hey," Sonny said "I thought I saw you dart in here....Good job on Jason's case."

Jason. Jason. Jason.

His mouth on her neck as he took her from behind while she was bent over his pool table. His rough leather jacket scraping against her bare back. Her completely naked and him with just his cock out. Him in control. Her breathless. Begging. Harder. Faster. Don't stop. Don't you dare stop, Jason.

"Thank you," she squeaked out to Sonny.

"Anyway, I just wanted to double check with you about tomorrow night. You're sure you're all right with bringing the girls to my place? Because if you're having second thoughts..."

_Why did I tell Jason no? _Alexis berated herself _Am I crazy? I must be certifiable! Who tells that man no? Has anyone, in the history of woman kind, told that man: Oh, no thank you, please do not fuck me into a near coma. I wouldn't like that at all....What have I done_?

"No," she said, her face feeling on fire. "No second thoughts. We have to start somewhere, right? Might as well have that somewhere be this somewhere, right? Right! Anyway, it would break Kristina's heart if I backed out now...and I'm not in any position to court heartbreak these days."

_He would only bring me stress_, she told herself. _Dating a hitman? It's a ludicrous thought. But screwing is not dating, is it? But, of course, we would date. I mean it would be inevitable, wouldn't it? Or would it? Could I tell him: Just sex, Jason....Yes, that's genius! Just sex. Secret sex. I'll tell him that the next chance I get._

"Good. Good," Sonny said.

_Good. Oh fuck, Alexis_, she heard Jason say in her brain, _That's so good. _

"See you tomorrow night!" she cried to Sonny.

"All right. Seven o'clock. Olivia is thrilled to be able to do this. First time the whole family is getting together for something and all that. It just feels right, you know?"

_That feels so right, Jason_, she heard herself say in a breathless tone, as she imagined herself impaled on the thick, hard length of him, _So right! Harder, Jason! Harder! Oh, God!_

"Sure!"

"You okay?" Sonny asked.

"I'm so....tired. The trial just about exhausted me."

Sonny looked her over closely, with concerned eyes. The last few months had brought them emotionally closer than they had been since Kristina was conceived. They had to bound together to help their daughter through a rough time. She was feeling like neither of her parents understood her, loved each other, or could work together for her sake. They proved to her, through spending time together at Alexis house, that they could. It almost felt like her and Sonny would reunite there for a few weeks. But then Jason was arrested for murder. Sonny found out Dante was his son. And Alexis and Sonny were pulled in opposite directions again.

He told her now "Get some rest then, counselor. See you tomorrow."

He kissed her cheek and she just about melted against him. He might not be Jason but damn he smelled good, looked good, and used to star in the majority of her sexual fantasies for years. Sonny moved back and walked out of the room.

Alexis closed the door and then leaned her back against it, letting out a long breath.

_Am I really going to do this? Start screwing Jason?_ she asked herself.

Her eyes closed as she contemplated the answer. And another intense fantasy kicked off. The kind she denied herself for three months but she couldn't anymore. Her knees over his shoulders as he stared down at her with a look in his eyes that said, while he thrust like a piston into her, _I own your body. Say it! Say it!_

_You own me, Jason._

_Oh God, _she thought,_ I'm completely losing control of myself._

And over one closed mouth kiss. This was the start of something that she could not even imagine where it would end up. With her luck, adjoining jail cells and matching prison uniforms.

XXXXXXXXXXX

_Don't._

The word repeated in Jason's head as he rode to Harborview Towers in the back of a limo. Once he got into his apartment he started to jerk out of his damn suit. He hated those things. He headed up the stairs, peeling off his clothes as he went.

Spinelli had moved in with Maxie while Jason was in lock up. So now Jason could get naked any damn place he pleased in this Penthouse. And right now he felt like getting naked as he walked toward his shower.

He was fucking pissed off and sexually frustrated.

_Don't,_ Alexis had said, while pointing at him like he was one of her kids or a dog.

No, Jason. Bad Jason. Back off. Hands off.

He usually wouldn't get riled up about some chick saying no. First off, rarely did they say no. He couldn't even remember one who did. But somewhere in the past there had to be someone, sometime, and he was sure he just nodded and walked away. Secondly, it was a chick's decision if two people had sex. Every man knew that. So he had to respect that decision. It was nothing to be a prick about.

She had her reasons.

But damn if he was not still half hard over her, as he climbed into the shower and cranked it on.

_Don't. Don't. Don't._ Her voice echoed in his mind.

There goes making all his sexual fantasies about his lawyer into some hot, sweaty reality. He bet she looked amazing naked. Those breasts were just the right size. Her ass had that nice curve to it. Her legs...fuck...those legs. Those smooth, tan legs were a big part of his fantasies. Thinking about them wrapped around him, her heels digging into his back, as he looked down at her and knew, without a doubt, she was insane with lust over him.

Getting a woman like Alexis, who could be so tightly wound, that out of her mind, screaming and panting and begging for it, that was the ultimate turn on for Jason. He had never done that before. Never got someone who was buttoned up to lose her mind over him. Now he wanted to do it more than he wanted a cold beer, this shower, and a long bike ride. But he would settle for those three because he had no choice.

"FUCK!" he said as the water hit his back.

He needed her in that shower with him. Naked. Soapy. Drenched. Dripping. Eager. Smiling. Stroking.

He groaned. He never should have snuck a peek that time she bent over. He knew he was asking for trouble.

And look. He got it.


	69. Heat, 3

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Three**

**December 2nd****h****, 2009**

**Wednesday**

Sanity reigned.

Alexis was still thanking God that she had not been foolish and followed her first instinct the night before- which would have had her at Jason's door just as fast as her Mercedes could get her to Harborview Towers so she could find out if he fucked as good in real life as he did in her mind.

Since that was just asking for her life to get completely messy- and at Christmas time too, when she should focus on her kids- she did not do that. Well, she almost did that, is more honest.

She drove to his building. Looked at it. And then drove to Jake's and had a half of bottle of wine, played pool with Coleman and told herself that was a wild enough night for her. Yeah, right.

But it was the smart choice.

She could have really played it safe- and boring- and went home, got in a bath, and just let her fingers go to the places she wanted Jason to go. Or she could have went to the Metro Court and took some lawyer, doctor, stockbroker or somebody else respectable from the bar up to a suite. Yawn. Been there and done that. And she would rather forget it.

Just like she needed to forget her brief dalliance with the thought of asking Jason to enter into a secret, just sex, affair with her.

Because if they did then nights like this-when she had to be a party with him- would be totally uncomfortable. She'd keep thinking they would be found out. Their secret revealed in front of everyone.

And she didn't need that in her life. Right? Of course not.

Of course she did need orgasms again that were brought on by someone other than herself. But....she couldn't have everything, now could she?

_Can I?_ she asked herself, as she stood, sipping wine in Sonny's living room at an early holiday party.

Olivia had really wanted to throw this. She said they all needed it after the depression of Claudia dying while giving birth less than a month back. It seemed Olivia was all about family. Especially since she had managed to bring about the a peace treaty between Sonny and his firstborn son. They didn't start off out on the right foot but they were getting a little bit closer to there now.

And Olivia and Sonny were getting back the love they lost twenty five years before.

Alexis rolled her eyes at the idea of them believing in happy ever after and destiny. Sonny sure racked up a lot of destined- to- be lovers in his life.

_That was just mean. Be happy for them, _she told herself.

If she wasn't so damn horny, thanks to that damn hit man kissing her, maybe she could be a little more pleasant about Olivia's heart and flowers attitude lately.

But, unfortunately, she was extremely horny. Even standing here in a room filled with kids around, mob soldiers, her ex- lover, her ex-husband, her best friend, Carly, Spinelli, Maxie and other people who should all be sufficient deterrents to her getting turned on, Alexis' head was still filled with images of Jason naked.

_That's it, _she thought angrily._ I'm going to tell him off for kissing me and make sure he never does that again because I do not need this kind of extra stress in my life. I'm a busy working woman and a single mother!_

She walked across the room- not taking in the Christmas tree, music or buffet of gourmet foods anymore- with her eyes locked on Jason, who was talking to Milo.

She touched his arm. His head jerked to the side. Their eyes met. Her breath hitched in her throat.

"Hey," he said.

"Alone. Now."

Milo startled. "Excuse me. Good to see you, Ms. Davis. Happy holidays."

"You too," she said, staring into Jason's eyes.

She didn't even think that maybe someone she didn't want to be watching was watching them at that very moment. Because she was too determined to get this all straightened out with Jason.

Alone.

They needed to be alone. And she needed to tell him how it would be from now on. Right now. Alone. Right this second.

With a nod, Jason walked out of the room. Alexis waited two minutes, finishing her wine and setting the glass down before following him into the foyer, pulling the door closed as she did. He had already sent the gaurd away.

He stood there looking handsome in black pants and a blue shirt. His hair had been cut that day. The look in his eye was eager, almost boyish.

_Fantastic!_ she ranted. _He goes from hot to cute. Like I need this. Lord, You are not funny! _

"Hey," he said, rubbing his hands together.

Seeing that made her think of him rubbing those hands over her ass. She licked her lips.

His eyes searched hers.

She blinked several times, trying to clear her head, "Hello."

"You wanted to talk?"

There it was again. Eager. Good God. How could any woman resist an eager Jason Morgan?

Her stomach was doing flip flops. She ran her tongue over her lips another time. She was wearing a curve flattering green dress. Brand new. Bought with him in mind. But that was just because now that she knew he found her hot in business suits she didn't want him disappointed at how she looked in evening wear. He hadn't noticed in years past. Now he was more than noticing.

And her womanly pride made her want him to enjoy what he was noticing. But that was all. She didn't want to encourage.

Her mouth was so dry she could barely get out. "Yes."

He stepped closer to her. She backed against the door and held out a hand.

His face fell. He froze. His eyes narrowed.

"Jason......what happened yesterday, while being nice, was not something we should repeat."

"Nice?" he ground out.

The sound of that one frustrated word sent shivers down her spine. The word reverberated against the silk of her panties as if he pressed his lips right to her mound and said it.

"Yes, nice," she whispered. "But a one time nice event."

His eyes sparked with dueling desire and anger. "Fine."

One clipped word and he was moving past her for the door she was leaning on. He reached for the handle, his body brushed hers. Her breasts tingled at the contact. She bit her bottom lip. He looked down and into her eyes.

She looked up and into his. Stunning blue eyes sparking with lust and frustration. He wanted her desperately.

Irresistible.

Alexis grabbed a fistful of his shirt with one hand, and cupped the back of his head with the other, making him bend so that she could press her lips to his. The door rattled slightly as her back bumped against it. Jason pressed his body tight to hers, as she controlled the kiss. She wound her arms around his neck. Her tongue licked at his lips. He started to open his mouth.

She was really about to do this. Thrust her tongue into the warm recesses of Jason's mouth. Make her body crave him even worse than it did already. Mimic what she wanted him to do by thrusting his tongue right inside of her wet, slick folds.

The front door opened.

Alexis jumped back at the sound, wobbling on her heels. Jason's hand reached out and grabbed her arm to steady here.

In walked Sam and Max, laughing and joking, in their own world as newlyweds, with their eyes only on each other. It took a moment for them to see Jason and Alexis.

"Oh! Hi, Mom. Sorry we're late....We got," Sam giggled. "hung up."

Max blushed.

Alexis' eyes were wide as she turned away from Jason. "Happy holidays, you two. You should get inside and greet Olivia. She was getting worried you were going to be no-shows."

Max said "That's my fault, Mom."

Alexis sighed at him calling her that. But he was so dopey, happy in love with Sam that she didn't have the heart to tell him that she preferred all mob soldiers to address her as Ms. Davis.

"Sorry," Max added. "Lets go, honey."

Sam smiled bigger than Alexis had seen since the wedding reception as she looked at Max. Then she took his hand. Walking past Jason she said "Hi."

"Hey."

When they were gone, Jason closed the door again. This time he did not wait for Alexis to talk, he just said "Don't jerk me around."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

She was driving him nuts. Come closer. No, go away. It was turning into game playing and he did not like games at all.

Jason wanted Alexis.

But he didn't want to get on his hands and knees and beg her. And he didn't want her to say no when she meant yes. He wanted nothing less than her so crazy over him she pleaded for him to fuck her. He wanted to know what it felt like to see her doing a strip tease for him....ready, willing and able to make him come like he had not come in years.

Just seeing someone so uptight, at times, get wild like that would make him harder and more turned on then he had been in a long ass time. He could feel his dick twitching in his boxers already from their kiss a few minutes before. And that kiss was just the start of the heat they could spark together.

If she would stop playing like she didn't want this.

How could she not want it? Didn't her stomach clench with need every time she saw him, like his did for her? Didn't she feel overheated, in need of a cold shower or a good fucking, when he came into the room, like he felt when she swung those hips in his direction? Didn't her heart race at the sight of him, like his heart was beating like a drum over her?

What the fuck was the hold up here? Was he not good enough to be in her bed, according to her? Not good enough to be her man?

Or did she want a date first?

Jason stilled. Maybe that was it. Maybe his crazed, lust drenched, sex starved brain had been so foggy he was missing some signals. She was a lady. Not a whore.

He was fine with giving her a date. Fine. Okay. Sounded good. Just as long as somewhere in the next few weeks...if he didn't lose his mind before then or his life because he was so consumed with thinking about her that he drove his bike into a telephone pole...she ended up in front of him in lacy lingerie and then in nothing at all. Wearing a smile.

He wanted her into this just as much as he was. Into him. Crazed over him. It wouldn't be a turn on if she was pushing him away and then saying "Well, all right, I guess so," like she was doing him a big favor. Or acting like this was not what she wanted as bad as he wanted it.

Jason wanted to break her of her no, no, no, attitude. Make her a hot, hungry, withering, begging, soaking wet, rubbing her own thighs together for relief, grabbing at her own breasts, panting, telling him: Fuck me hard and fast, Jason.

And he would. Gladly.


	70. Heat, 4

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Four**

**December 2nd, 2009**

**Wednesday**

"Don't jerk me around."

The words were hissed at Alexis by Jason as they stood in the foyer of Greystone at Sonny's Christmas party. For the second time in two days Jason had found his lips on hers...once because he just had to taste her after he was released from jail, and today because she initiated a kiss by grabbing his shirt, cupping his head and slamming her mouth against his. But, also on both days, she said they shouldn't kiss again.

She needed to make up her mind. He was only getting hotter and hotter for her. Cold showers, jerking off, and bike rides only did so much to calm him down. He was getting worked up over the idea of her and he didn't like feeling out of control.

It wasn't good for his business or his life.

He wasted three months in jail because he was charged with killing someone he wished he had killed but didn't- Jerry Jacks. Now that he was out he wanted to get on with living. And that started with getting on with his plan to fuck Alexis Davis senseless.

If she wanted that.

He hadn't really been planning to date her beforehand. He was thinking: Fuck her first. Order some dinner. Then talk.

But he had to backtrack all that thinking now because he was starting to get the idea that maybe she felt like he was treating her like a sex object. Like a slut. And he had never meant to do that. Not at all.

She said "Don't get an attitude with me. You caused this mess!" Her voice was a frustrated whisper.

He raised an eyebrow and stepped closer to her. "Mess?"

Jason prayed his voice did not sound hurt. There was no way he was getting hurt feelings over his lawyer rejecting him. So what that she was the first woman he felt comfortable enough with to want to take to his bed in more than a year? So? That didn't mean he had to fall in love with her.

So what that he had been one second from asking her on a date before she kicked him in the ribs for the third time in twenty four hours? So? He was a grown ass man. He could deal.

Alexis ranted, waving her hands, and whispering "You need more proof that it would be a mess than Sam just walking by five seconds ago?"

"Is that the only thing holding you back?"

"You do remember what you do for a living, right? Am I the only one between us who remembers you are a high ranking member of a organized crime syndicate and I am your barely walking the line between legal and getting my license revoked lawyer? Does that sound familiar to you? Because its giving me flashbacks."

He straightened. His back went completely stiff. Party over for him. "Sonny." He nodded, once. And then he walked out, without his coat, grabbed his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door to his SUV.

When he was inside the vehicle, even more pissed off than the day before at her, he saw her in the doorway, staring out at him.

She looked beautiful. With the moonlight on her that way. But she always had been a beautiful woman. He just forced himself to not think too hard about that before.

And that is what he would have to do again.

Jason started the SUV and drove off the property without glancing in the rearview mirror to give himself one last image of her that night. It was time to forget his fantasies about fucking his lawyer. He needed to get his mind calm again.

It was a hot fantasy. But it was just making a messy life for him. Alexis had been right. Between Sam and Sonny for her....and Jason not being able to think straight anymore....they were just too complicated and risky.

Still, he had wanted to take that risk for her. Fuck. He hated his life sometimes. He really did.

XXXXXXXXXXX

**December 4****th****, 2009**

**Friday**

It was all for the best.

Alexis told herself that over and over. At the party she said that every five minutes, in her head. And the next day she it every half hour, as she lounged around her house all day in a funk. Now it was Friday and she was up to only having to remind herself once an hour that it would have been akin to professional suicide to sleep with her client who is a hitman.

Especially when she had the reputation dogging her of sleeping with a mob boss, marrying a mob lawyer, having a fling with a confirmed psycho named Jerry Jacks, and being with her colleague, the mayor.

Not to mention all the other reasons: Sam, Carly, Jax, Sonny, Ric.

Everyone would have a fit and a half over it.

Of course, she was not living her life to please them. She loved Sam and Jax. But they had to let her be an adult, didn't they? An adult who had sex on occasion. They were both married and she didn't judge- that much- their spouses. She bit her tongue. Till it bled.

It was unfair to put her choice off on those other people. It was her choice. They would cope.

And her reputation couldn't get any worse- no matter what she did, not at this point. She was still making millions anyway and heir to a fortune. She was a Cassadine. She knew how to work the system and come out on top.

So what was holding her back?

Fear.

Jason made her feel so alive that her thighs quivered in his mere presence these days. And that was getting a little too real for her.

He wasn't a stranger. She knew him and respected him for his devotion to his family. Add hot sex to that and what would they have?

She swallowed hard.

So it was for the best that she rejected Jason because she was not looking to get into a relationship. She should focus on just getting through the holidays. All she did in relationships was blow up her and her kids' worlds.

_A life without sex_? she asked herself as she walked into the coffee shop. _Can I really never go there again? No. Not a chance. But love? I could get by without that. Haven't I gotten by without it since the day Ric got naked with my daughter on my living room floor? Yes, I have, if anyone is keeping track. So I can get by without it some more....I will be a professional today with Jason_.

When she became his defense attorney she had also taken a look at his Will, which he was worried about because he might be spending his life in prison. He decided he wanted to add Carly's newborn baby son to it, along with increasing what he was giving Spinelli.

Alexis was at the coffee shop today to go over the things he wanted bequeathed to them. She could have done it through faxing back and forth but that would only make it obvious she was avoiding Jason. And she was not trying to avoid him.

She actually missed him a little.

Sue her. She got used to seeing him everyday for three months and now she hadn't seen him at all yesterday. Plus he was mad at her. It was bringing her down to think about it.

She plastered a smile on her face, as she walked up to his office door. "Good afternoon, Milo."

"Good afternoon, Ms. Davis."

"May I?" she motioned at the door.

"He's in with someone right now."

"That's fine. I'll just have one of those mocha java blast venti latte whatever they are called while I wait for him to be free again."

Milo nodded, with a sweet smile on his lips, as she walked away. After she had her coffee she sat down at a table, and was looking at her blackberry- checking out a website that was having a shoe sale- when Jason's office door opened.

Out walked Liz Webber. Looking quite emotional. She hurried out of the coffee shop.

Liz. She wasn't in the Will. Either was her son, Jacob Martin. But that didn't mean there were not arrangements made to see that Jake got his fair share of Jason's estate. It would be divided equally between him, Michael, Morgan, Spinelli and Carly's baby son: Matthew Jason Jacks, who everyone called M.J.

Jake's part went into a trust. The trust then had to be accessed by Emily. But the money was there for Jason's child should he need it.

Alexis wondered if whatever made Liz emotional had to do with the fact that she had broken her latest engagement to Lucky. She was at Jason's trial everyday. Defeating the purpose of all the distance she put between them in the last few years.

Alexis tensed up.

It shouldn't matter to her if Jason was thinking of getting with the mother of his child another time. So why did she suddenly feel sick? And territorial?

Jason was his own man. He could do what he wanted and with who.

Grabbing her briefcase and coffee, she headed for his office. He stood when she walked in. "Hey."

"Hello. I'm hear to go over your Will. It shouldn't take more than an hour. You remembered our meeting was scheduled for now, right?"

He nodded and sat down.

They spent the next fifty minutes in working mode. She ended up sitting on the edge of the desk, with her legs crossed, sucking on the arm of her eye glasses, and reading over a codicil to his Will, when she heard a very soft...barely audible....moan escape Jason's lips.

She stiffened. Her nipples tightened. She felt her juices start to flow. Her eyes fluttered. Butterflies danced underneath her rib cage.

And that was all before she turned and looked at him. Sitting in his chair, staring at her legs where her skirt had rode up slightly and looking like he wanted to lick her from her toes to her slit, then back down again, back up again, down again, up again, down again....gulp.

She asked him "How about drinks at Jake's since we're done here?"

He popped out of his seat. "I'll drive."

Her eyes went to the bulge in his pants.

_There's no reason to over think everything so much_, Alexis told herself. _I am an adult and I like sex. Its not a crime....and anyway.....he's too hard to keep saying no to....and I'm too wet to want to say no another time._

She packed up her briefcase. "I'll meet you there."

His eyes bore into hers.

She gave him a small smile. "What? Do you think I won't show up?"

"See you there in twenty minutes. Twenty. Not twenty one."

"And if I catch a red light?"

"Expect me to come looking for you." With that he grabbed his jacket and walked out.

Alexis let out a long breath, as Milo looked in at her. She hurried off the desk and turned away, adjusting her clothes.

She could hardly believe she was getting ready to go to a roadside, rundown bar with Jason. But she was. And she couldn't wait.


	71. Heat, 5

**Heat**

**Note**- Jason's age has been reconfigured due to Michael's sorasing. So, for this, he is 38. He was with Carly when he was 19. Alexis is around 44.

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Five**

**December 4****th****, 2009**

**Friday**

Nineteen minutes. Alexis had one more minute to get to Jake's before Jason's deadline. It was a fifteen minute drive in rush hour from the coffee shop to the bar. It wasn't rush hour quite yet- just mid afternoon.

Jason had been there three minutes already, sitting on a stool at the bar, with his nerves on edge. She made him more off balance than he'd been since he was nineteen and juggling two chicks at once. He barely knew if it was day or night around Alexis these days.

If she didn't show up today, that was it, he was done with her. Two days of back and forth was more than enough for him. He wanted to fuck her badly- and did not mind working for that- but he was not about to play childish games like she was a virgin and he was a school boy hoping to get to second base for the first time.

She needed to figure out what she wanted. If it was dates, like he suspected, that was cool. He was more than down with that idea.

Dates meant more sexy, slit up to here, cleavage bearing, dresses for him to drool over her being in. Not that he would let her know, till they were alone, just how fucking drool worthy he found her body.

Maybe the fact that he acted like he wanted to just screw her and not date her is what caused the majority of her problems with the idea of them. Or maybe he just liked thinking that because it was easier than thinking she was really hung up on things he couldn't fix like his job, the fact Sam was his ex, and Sonny was her ex.

Alexis had been the one to suggest they get drinks at Jake's though. That could mean she'd rather bring up dating herself than completely walk away from him because he hadn't done it yet.

He didn't know.

She was turning him all around. He was getting dizzy with the places his mind were going. She needed to get to this bar and quick. Bring her sexy, suit wearing, fantastic, curvy ass in the door already. Seeing someone like her- who could be so buttoned up- somewhere like Jake's would be hot as hell.

Jason refused to let his mind go back almost two decades in time and remember why this place wasn't somewhere he took chicks anymore. He wouldn't let this day get ruined for him because of the past. Carly brought Jax here before. When Jason heard about it, he hated it. But he got why it happened. Because life had to go on.

Jake's would always be special to them but it couldn't be off limits. Sacred, holy ground. Carly had already ruined that by having Patrick, Jax and fuck knows who else up in here anyway. Not to mention, cause he didn't like to go there, he had been here with Liz a long time ago.

Jake's was the bar to go when you wanted to forget who you were. Alexis must feel like being that way tonight. Jason didn't want to ruin that chance for her by suggesting another bar.

Really he hadn't wanted to risk telling Alexis anything that sounded remotely like no when she brought up the idea of them coming here. He was horny, into her, and wanted to get something going today. Not hit another road block.

Where was she?

His jeans were already getting uncomfortably tight for the second time that day because he was now thinking about paying Coleman to close down the bar and fucking Alexis on the pool table. But he wouldn't.

His bed was more comfortable and he could keep her there all night long.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Anything worth doing,_ she reminded herself, _is worth doing right_.

Alexis looked in the mirror above the driver's seat in her Mercedes, as she put on lipstick, then spritzed on perfume. She took her hair down, flipped it over, and flipped it back. Ran her fingers through it. Unbuttoned a button on her shirt.

Sucked in a breath and let it out.

_This is so worth doing right_, she told herself.

When she walked into the bar she acted as sexy and confident as she could pull off. Looking at Coleman first she said "Hello. You know what I like." Then she gave Jason a wink.

His blue eyes darkened with enough lust that if desire was fire Port Charles would be burning right now.

Alexis slipped off her black wool coat and then her suit jacket. Jason took them and laid them over a nearby chair, where his coat already was.

Sliding onto a stool, she crossed her legs and angled her body toward him. He scooted a little closer. His jean clad leg brushed her pantyhose covered one. Their eyes warred with each other in a seductive dance for dominance.

Alexis might let him take her hard and fast tonight. Or she might take him quick and dirty. She hadn't decided yet. Maybe she felt like breaking a bad boy.

Could be fun.

_You are so playing with fire_, her conscious told her, _expect to get burned._

Well, if she did get burned, it would be after she got fucked. And right now, just like Jason obviously wanted, getting fucked was the first priority.

She'd gone back and forth about this in her mind till she was a pretzel. Now that she had decided to go for it, she wanted to truly go all the way with this. Take it to the limit, whatever that ended up being.

She wasn't going this far out onto a limb, into this much of a danger zone, and then doing it halfway. Timidly. With apologies on her lips.

No. If she was really letting Jason slide off her panties tonight then she was making the absolute most out of the experience.

Alexis took hold of his wrist and looked at his watch. "I think I was late."

A small grin snuck onto his lips. Was he thinking of ways to punish her?

Her fingers slid against his pulse point at his wrist. She smiled and then let go of him.

Coleman said "So what're you two crazy cats up to tonight?"

Jason ground out "Just pour drinks."

"All right." Coleman threw up his hands. "All right. I hear ya, man. Its cool. You holler if you need another round."

Alexis sipped her wine. Jason took a long swallow of his beer.

She ordered him "Tell me something I don't know about you."

He blinked several times, looking like he was snapping out of a fantasy and back to reality. He cleared his throat. "Uh..."

She smiled at his slight uncomfortableness. Cute.

Strangely she wasn't thinking much about how she was out with her daughter's ex. Compared to the whole time she knew Jason he was with Sam for a short while, and she knew Sam was her daughter for only some of that time. Not that the issue didn't matter to Alexis. It did.

But she knew Jason beyond being her daughter's boyfriend. She knew him back when he was crazy in love with Carly and her son. Saw him lose that family. Saw him move on as best he could and grow up, go through struggles and changes, and saw him become a man who lost a lot of the light in his eyes.

Today he was more alive than she'd seen him in years though. She did that for him. It was a powerful feeling. It caused an even more demanding desire to shoot through her veins. Her blood to thicken and flow hot. She could make Jason forget his ghosts. That was intensely erotic to her.

She could make this messed up, cold, lonely man smile.

And he was making her remember she was still a sexy, vibrant, fierce, take no prisoners and offer no apologies woman. A Davidovich turned Davis because she was a survivor and this world would never break her.

She broke people. Not the other way around.

She didn't have to fear what would happen if her and Jason got too out of control, liked the sex too much, liked it all too much. Why should she? She could handle anything.

It was about time she remembered that.

Jason wet his lips and then answered her question about something she did not know about him "Spinelli made a video game and I'm the main character in it."

"I knew that. Try again."

Shaking his head, he paused. "Come on."

She gave him a look that said he wasn't getting out of this.

Another small grin. He let out a breath. "I lived in Italy for a while."

"Knew that."

He shook his head again. "I want to go to Africa next summer."

"With Michael. I know."

"Alexis." He chuckled.

"There has to be something I don't know. You're a closed book. Open it."

He leaned close to her, brushed back her hair, and moved his mouth near her ear. "I wanted to take you in that interrogation room every damn day."

Her body set fire as tingles ricocheted from her breasts to her center, up and down her arms and legs, and down her spine. Her temperature rocketed up ten degrees.

She breathed out, with her mouth by his ear, "I know."

He pulled back. Their eyes met.

She said "Okay, we know each other. That's clear. So tell me something you know about me."

Settling back on his stool, he took a pull off his bottle of beer and then answered "You're a fantastic lawyer."

"Obvious answer but true." She smiled and sipped her drink.

"You like horseback riding."

"Correct. But that's normal in my family. It's required, actually."

"You went to boarding school."

"Yes, I did."

"So did I. Not that I remember that. I don't think I'd like it. It seems kinda fucking cruel to me. I couldn't imagine doing that to Michael."

"I liked it. It was freedom for me."

One of his fingers touched her leg, right under where her skirt stopped, and slid down over her knee. She felt fire burn that spot like a flame stroked against her skin instead of a finger.

There were only three more people in the bar. Some guy Alexis didn't know who was in his mid-forties and looked to be a blue collar working joe. He who was nursing a draft beer. And Dr. Kelly Lee and Dr. Lainey Winters were doing tequila shots. Coleman was distracted with flirting with them.

Alexis looked into Jason's eyes. In a languid, relaxed tone, she asked "Scale of one to ten, last night, how angry were you at me?"

"I didn't get what was going on in your head."

"I made good points."

"Okay."

"But those points aren't the be all and end all to everything, Jason, are they? I mean.....we are still grown adults who can make grown adult decisions, right?"

Raising an eyebrow, he joked "Is that a serious question that you expect an answer for?"

"Rhetorical. We are adults and we can make any decisions we want, right? If we decide we want something private, then we should have that."

He stared at her for a long moment. "You want to go out of town with me?"

"What?"

"Tonight."

"What?"

"Just say no. Or yes. Not what again. Do you want to take a trip somewhere together for this weekend, Alexis?"

"A what?"

He chuckled. "Call Olivia." She was living with Sonny.

"Olivia?"

"To watch the kids. Or I could call Emily. But, you know, that house....and she's going through a lot still."

"Viola stays with the girls when I go anywhere."

"Okay."

"But where would we be going?"

"Wherever."

She downed her wine. He chuckled again.

Her head was spinning. "I don't understand where this is all coming from."

"Its called a date."

Just then Coleman came back "A date? Did I hear that right? Hey, everyone, a round on the house! Check out this hot new item."

Jason glared at Coleman like his life span just shortened up considerably.

Alexis just swallowed hard.

A trip? What?


	72. Heat,6

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Six**

**December 4th****, 2009**

**Friday**

After Coleman announced to everyone in Jake's- which was only three people- that Jason and Alexis were dating, Jason said to her "Lets get out of here." He threw money on the bar.

Coleman said "No way, man. Put that moolah back in your wallet. Your cash's no good here."

Jason pointed at him in a way that said he would catch up with him later.

Coleman said "Whoa, man, I offend you somehow? Stay for a round on the house. Everyone leaves Jake's with a smile on their face. Stick around and relax with your lady love....a fine lady, if I do say so myself."

Jason felt a growl grumbling in the back of his throat. There was only so much Coleman he could take. Hadn't he told that ass to just pour drinks and keep his country mouth shut?

Jason helped Alexis into her coat and then went outside into the frigid winter air.

He could see her breath. He had the urge to hug her to keep her warm. But that was getting a little ahead of himself. First he had to find out if she was up for this trip with him this weekend or not.

She seemed stunned still.

He had decided she wanted dates. If she didn't then she would be fucking him right now. Since she instead brought up getting drinks at a bar, not naked in his Penthouse, he decided it would be dating then hot, dirty, long love making sessions.

Not that he was looking for love, neccesarily, but they were friends so it wasn't like just picking up a stranger or anything.

They couldn't have a decent first date in this damn city so he wanted to take her somewhere she wouldn't worry at all about who saw them. About gossip. Her reputation. Her kid's feelings. Her ex.

That meant out of town.

Anywhere would do for him. He had pass keys for Metro Court Hotels in several different cities. Not that it had to be there. He was up for anything.

Work could wait for two days. The Zaccharas were done- with John out of the business, Claudia dead, and Anthony locked up. There was no immediate threat.

He could spare the time. And if Sonny didn't like it then he could fuck off. Jason wanted this, and if Alexis wanted it to, they would have it.

He leaned close to her, as they stood by her car. He was behind her. He whispered against her ear. "Yeah?" he asked, prompting her about if she wanted to go out of town with him or not.

She shivered. Her eyes drifted close. He wrapped his arms around her and pressed himself against her. Getting a little to lax in watching his ass in public from a drive by but she made him only think about one thing: putting a smile on her face.

Getting his hands on her naked flesh should more than make her smile- if she was as hot for him as he was for her. Taking her to dinner and talking about whatever the hell she brought up should also get him a few more smiles. Maybe he'd even dance with her- once. For a smile.

Three months in prison, thinking about her, and two days of her giving him looks like he was nuts to believe he could be her man, had his head consumed with the idea of proving to Alexis they would work in and out of the bedroom.

Then she'd never tell him Don't again.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"All right."

_All right? All right? I just agreed to go out of town with Jason,._ she rambled to herself, _Well, its official. I've became a wanton sexual slave to this man. He says jump and I say: What bed, sir? But there are worse things to be, aren't there? Sure there are. And a vacation would be nice after three months of working hard on his case. A good reward for a job well done. Plus it could be interesting to make Jason drop his cold facade like he did inside of Jake's a few minutes earlier...get a few more chuckles from him. This man who was so silent and withdrawn for years there. I could be good for him. And he could be good to me....give me some orgasms I don't have to be solo in experiencing or regret the next day because the man wasn't someone I even liked. And beyond orgasms we could swim, have drinks, talk about grown up adult things that I can't talk to the kids about and Diane and Kate are too self absorbed to care about. It could be fun. Why not? _

Jason ordered, his mouth warm on her cold earlobe, "Go home and pack. A driver will pick you up at six."

She nodded then opened the car door, with shaking hands. Alexis turned around. Finding her boldness again she told him "Aruba."

"Done."

"Rent a villa with a private pool and hot tub."

"Got it."

"And only if you are looking to ruin my mood would you even think of telling Carly about this before we leave."

His eyes held hers. "Go pack. Now."

"No."

He raised an eyebrow.

Then she brought her mouth to his, giving him a very quick kiss, and pulled back. "Now I will go pack, call my nanny and cancel my brunch plans for Sunday with Diane."

She slipped into the car. Jason leaned down, before she closed the door, and murmured "Thanks."

"Lets wait till Monday and see who is thanking who more."

He gave her a small grin and then stood up. He closed the door, gave her one nod, and then she started the Mercedes and drove away. Her body was burning up. Her bra felt tight and uncomfortable. Her panties were rubbing against her sending shocks through her over heated slick folds.

Damn. They hadn't even had a wild, tongue tangling kiss yet, and already her body was throbbing for Jason. Calling out his name.

He was one lethal man.

He had her all turned around and she didn't want to get back on track the way she used to be in her boring, unsatisfying, old style.

She wanted a hot, sweaty, naked weekend of debauchery with Jason instead.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

A few hours later, after Alexis told the her two youngest daughters that she was going out of town with Jason to deal with a legal matter at one of Sonny's casinos, she realized she would have to call Sonny- or else that lie could be blown out of the water before she ever got home.

And she did not want to explain anything to Molly, Kristina and especially to Sam till she knew if her and Jason were going to last beyond the next two days. No reason to tell them something she might not have to.

She wished she didn't have a reason to tell Sonny either. But there were only so many out-of-town legal things that Jason and Alexis could be going to together. Anything she said, they could easy bring up to Sonny, Michael, Morgan, Carly or Jax. So she had to make sure Sonny backed up her story.

For the girl's sake.

This was a conversation she never expected to have with her ex. She could ask Jason to do it, which would be so much easier, but she wasn't the type to foist off her problems on a man. She'd handle it herself.

Alexis was in her bedroom, with the door locked, and her suitcase nearly all the way packed, when she called Sonny's cell.

"Alexis."

"Hello, Sonny. Having a nice, quiet, violence and plotting revenge-free, evening?"

"Yeah. What's up? The girls doing okay?"

"Perfect. Molly is counting the days till the hospital Christmas party because Kristina has been roped into playing an elf this year. Molly has her camera ready."

He chuckled. "I'll make sure to be there."

"You should. Kristina will love that. No matter if she pouts through the whole night." After a pause she said "Well, this call is neither easy or one I relish making, so I'm going to spit it out quick...."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Nothing is wrong, per se. Something is just different....per se."

"Yeah, different how? Hooking up with that asshole Floyd again different?"

"No! Of course not! Sonny, really. I think that man did enough to my career for me to not even push him out of the way if a speeding bus, or Helena, was barreling towards him and the only thing standing between him and certain death was my generous spirit. He'd be one dead former mayor should that situation present itself."

"Good. So...different how? I can tell this has got some guy's name written all over it."

"I take offense to that. My life does not revolve around my bed partners."

He chuckled. "I didn't mean it like that. I just know how you get when you're...like this...not wanting to tell me who you're...."

"Do not say it."

He laughed. "What?"

"I know what term you use and its not fit for polite company."

"Now you're company?"

"I'd like politeness all the same."

"Okay, okay, counselor. Just tell me what you got to tell me? I'm ready for it. Its not about no guy up in your bed. So what it is about?"

After letting out a breath, she told him, in a prim tone "Jason and I."

"Yeah? Your working relationship? What about it? You quitting him?"

"That has not been decided yet. Though mixing business with pleasure is so messy, isn't it, Sonny?"

"Pleasure...huh?"

"If anyone asks you I'm out of town this weekend with Jason because you're having trouble with the unions at one of your casino and I'm helping with new contracts."

"Huh? Say again?"

"Jason and I are going away this weekend and it would be best, for all involved, if the true nature of our reason for being away was kept confidential. Don't make me say anymore."

There was a long pause. She imagined him staring at the phone and shaking his head. "Uh....huh...mmm. This is...I just don't get this."

"Happy holidays, Sonny. I'm really glad we've reached this mature point in our friendship. Tell Olivia I send my regards. Well, talk to you next week then. And remember....labor dispute...with your casino...and that is all, for the sake of peace regaining in my little corner of this world do not stray from the party line."

"Uh..."

"Good bye, Sonny."

Alexis hung up. Her heart raced. This weekend better be worth all she was going through. She had already spent five hundred plus dollars at a boutique buying lingerie, two hundred on a new bathing suit and sarong, and braved the condom aisle at the drug store. Just in case Jason didn't bring enough.

Now she told Sonny she was screwing Jason and made up a fib for her daughters. She could certainly use a glass of wine when she got on that private jet tonight.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason was in his living room, shoving his extra bullets into his duffle bag, when his phone rang. "Yeah?"

"You're banging Alexis?"

"You got to use that term? Come on, Sonny."

"That is the mother of my kid."

"Then show her some respect!"

"What.....what's going on with you two? Huh? This is coming out of left field. Since when do you even like Alexis in any way, shape or form? Huh? You just tolerated her. You two got nothing in common."

"We....got close...working on my case."

"You're taking her somewhere this weekend? You even think about coming to see me first?"

"Why would I do that?"

"Like I said...she's the mother of my kid!"

"You got a problem with this? Because...if you do....I'd say its your problem. Not mine."

After a long minute, Sonny said "At least she had the guts to tell me."

"I planned to tell you. Just not today. Because its my business. I'd tell you when I wanted you to know."

"Of course its your business when you tell me. I just don't like feeling like...you two were sneaking around...or something...but whatever. She wants me to tell people, if they ask, you two are doing some legal stuff at one of the casinos."

"Whatever. Tell people whatever she wants. I don't care. Look, I got to go. I'm heading to the airport."

"Check in this weekend. Being out of contact isn't safe."

"Fine."

"All right, Jason, well.....this is Alexis...so...you know...that makes this...completely different, you know? I'm concerned about this...about how this goes. I've seen her hurt before and you know I never like when that happens. Just remember that."

"The last thing I would do is use or hurt her. You know me better than that."

"All right then. Talk to you later."

Jason clicked off his phone without saying anything else. Now he wanted Alexis more than ever. Because being with her would take away the knots forming in his shoulders after dealing with Sonny.

And because she had been brave enough to do something Jason knew she had to hate- tell Sonny she was interested in Jason- so they could have their weekend together.

Alexis was not only smoking hot, smart as hell, dangerous as all fuck, she was also loyal and she was amazing.

No little girl unsure of herself like the types that sometimes threw themselves at Jason in bars. It was easy to walk away from them.

It was looking like it would be hard to ever want to walk away from Alexis. Not that he wanted to. He wasn't planning an escape route for after this weekend. Right now the only thing on his mind was getting to the airport and seeing her walk onto his jet.

Seeing her be brave and bold for him again. And knowing he was even closer to getting her stripped down to just a few pieces of lace, laying on a bed, begging for him to fuck her till she forgot her own name.

This weekend was going to be so good for him. So damn good.


	73. Heat 7

Note-I'm updating again so we can creep closer to the anticipated part.

Chapter nine is where the story gets sexier

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Seven**

**December 4th****, 2009**

**Friday**

She showed up to the plane in jeans. Hot damn. Jason's head titled to the side and he watched Alexis in total male appreciation of her fine body coming his way, as she walked toward him, wearing a black wool coat, black leather gloves, with her hair falling over her shoulders.

She had a rosy glow about her.

A low moan nearly escaped his lips. Soon she would be naked. Soon. Soon. After three months of teasing him, she would be all his to enjoy.

And enjoy her he planned to. From head to toe. Then back up again. Burying his lips against the wetness at her center, breathing her in, licking her dry and getting her wet all over again.

She saw him looking at her jeans and said "Its not smart to fly in pantyhose in case of a crash where there is a fire, according to a report I saw years ago done by Stone Phillips on Dateline."

He nodded.

Whatever the reason she was in jeans, he'd take it. He liked her in skirts too. Both worked for him. But jeans reminded him she could be laid back too. Jeans told him she might get on his motorcycle some day- one of his fantasies about her that did not include nudity.

The pilot stowed Alexis' luggage while she sat down and buckled herself in. Jason took a seat next to her.

He studied her. She didn't seem nervous. She seemed like her mind was made up. Fucking finally. Thank God. He couldn't take her holding up her hand again and saying: Don't. Or saying: I have my lists of reasons why we shouldn't.

He wanted her in the worst way. He hadn't wanted someone like this in a long, long time. This was completely different than how he had gone after other women. This time there was not an ounce of hesitation.

It had been years since he saw a woman and said: She's mine tonight. Fuck the consequences.

That is the point Jason was at with Alexis. He couldn't think of a reason not to do this. And he could think of pages and pages of reasons to do this. Very easy choice.

And she was down for it now.

His dick started to get excited just at the thought of her being next to him on the jet- smelling good, looking good, and smiling.

The pilot said "Mr. Morgan, we're cleared for take off, sir."

"Good."

The pilot nodded and left. As soon as he was gone, Jason threaded his fingers into Alexis' hair. His eyes locked onto hers. "I want you....bad."

She swallowed visibly. He was just about to kiss her with a hunger he hadn't shown her before when she leaned forward and started to suck on his bottom lip. Then give him short and sensual kisses that made him dizzy. He hadn't been kissed like this in so long. And never really like this. Never by Alexis. And that made it so much more intense.

She was his equal. She didn't ask to be saved or taken care of. She came to him grown up and with eyes wide open. Not needing him. Wanting him. Making a choice to be his.

So hot.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

God, this is what she needed. Yes. It felt so right. Sucking and nibbling on Jason's lips. Quick, sensual, kisses, getting to know what his lips felt like and what he liked.

She was burning up inside her coat and with her gloves on. She jerked away from him. Her body felt like an inferno.

The plane started to move.

He stared at her, with a raised eyebrow, as she gave him a small, reassuring smile. She started to peel off her gloves and coat, revealing a red sweater. She wanted that off too but there were pilots in the cockpit.

She waved her hand over her face. "God, its hot on this jet. Doesn't it have air conditioning? I don't know if I'm comfortable flying on a plane with something broken on it. I've been in a plane crash before, did you know that?"

"With Jax."

"Right."

"In the Sahara desert."

"Exactly and I swear it was not this hot there." She gave him a smile.

They really did know so much about each other. They had been in each other's worlds for too many years to count without feeling old. When they met she was less than ten years out of law school, but already gate keeping like a pro for her family in international legal matters spanning the whole globe, and he was just a kid trying to raise a kid.

Not much older than Kristina was now.

God, had it been that many years already? And only now were her and Jason thinking of getting together? What took them so long? And was this all just crazy hormones at play? Did she care?

Not really. She wanted him now and the desire was too great to turn away from.

But she wanted to live to one day straddle Jason. And this private jet, as fancy as it was, seemed rather shoddy, since the air was broken.

Going on about her plane crash she said "I don't relish the idea of repeating the experience of going down in a jet twice in one lifetime. Do you think the pilot should turn back, perhaps?"

"Nothing is wrong with the air conditioning."

She raised an eyebrow. Oh. It was just her then. She really hoped this was a Jason related heat flash and not menopause coming for her early.

Lifting Jason's hand, she pressed it to her cheek. "You positive about that?"

His only answer was to start to kiss her intensely, with his tongue sweeping through her mouth in an erotic exploration, as his fingers intertwined with hers. He pressed those joined hands over her head, against the leather seat, making her chest arch as he did. She left out the softest of moans. Jason broke their kiss, but kept his mouth a breath from hers, as he said "Fucking sweet, Alexis, hearing you moan for me like that."

His lips moved to her neck and soon she was letting out more and more breathless whimpers and soft moans as he licked and sucked on her skin. His hand massaged the inside of one jean clad leg. With her back arched, her breasts pressed against him, sending sparks shooting through her nipples and down into the center of her, leaving her tingling and completely alive, hungry, hot, ready for more.

Turbulence hit. Jason wasn't buckled in and went falling right out of his seat. Alexis gasped and looked down at him. "Are you okay?"

He moved back to his seat. "Fine."

She looked out of the corner of her eye, chuckling. "Maybe it would be wise to just relax. Participating in the mile high club has its hazards it seems."

He chuckled and buckled his seat belt. "I'd risk it but I'm not looking to be injured when we get to the beach house."

"Smart thinking."

She was completely overheated, turned on, and just about aching to feel his fingers slipping beneath the lace of her panties. Smoothing over her wetness, pinching her clit, sinking one and then two and then three fingers into her. Making her moan, like he loved to hear. Making her scream, like she had ached to do for years now. Really scream her head off because she was getting fucked so good and deep.

Alexis knew if she kept up this line of thought she'd be completely soaked through her panties and jeans by the time they landed. Nothing had gotten her this hot in years.

Just the thought of Jason- so dangerous, sensitive, cool at times, volatile at others- getting hard over her, aching for her, practically begging her to go away with him, it was a turn on of epic it was something she needed to try not to focus on for a few more hours. Till they were in Aruba and alone together.

Till she was showing him her new lingerie. She wonder what he liked. Silk? Satin? See-through? Sheer? Leather bustier? Crotchless panties? She had a little of everything in her suitcase. And when she said little, she meant little. Some of it didn't cover much. But that was the point.

She didn't work out three lunch hours a week to be ashamed of her body.

Her mouth was so dry. "Is there a fridge on this- not broken down, you assure me- private jet?"

"Sure. What do you want?"

"Water, please."

Jason got up and went to get in for her. He got one for himself and came back.

After taking a long drink of her water, Alexis looked at him and asked "We know what we're doing, right?"

He nodded.

She said "So lets just agree to enjoy this weekend and worry about next week, next week. No talking about it till then."

"Fine with me."

"Good. You're easy to negotiate with. I like that in a man."

He gave her a stern look. "Don't think you'll run me over. Because, I think you know by now, that won't ever happen."

Her eyes danced with amusement. She ran a manicured nail down the middle of his t-shirt. "I never was properly motivate to try before. You might be surprised what I can get done if I really put my mind to it."

He smirked. Leaning close to her, his voice dropped low as he asked "So you like to control your men? Or do you like to be controlled?"

"Yes. Both. Depending on the day and hour and mood."

With a fuller grin, Jason sat back in his seat and put his seat belt on again.

Alexis said "Yes, please do keep yourself in one piece. This weekend depends on you being in full working order. It won't be much fun for you if you just have to watch me....would it?"

"Keep talking," he warned her, in a low growling tone "and the pilots will have a story to tell when we land."

She swallowed down a gulp. Her nipples were such hard, tight nubs of nerves now that every breath was causing her pleasure and pain.

Good pleasure. Good pain.

Jason was making Alexis remember a time when she really liked sex still. When she didn't live just to be a mom, lawyer, buddy and shoe sale shopper. When there was a man in her life that made her want to spread her legs and take him into her. Made her want to crawl on top of him and sink down the length of his shaft till she felt him completely filling her to the hilt.

He was taking her back so many years in time that she was couldn't believe it. Why had she ever let herself become that other woman? That workaholic, stressed out, playing the political game, bitter over Sonny, always mad at Ric, friends with Kate when she didn't even really enjoy her company, lost in the grind of 9-5 and the second shift of being a Mommy, running, running, running but always falling behind anyway, woman?

She didn't want to be only that. She wanted some of this too. Something wild and free, steamy and just a little shocking, with a dangerous man that she should run away from but she wouldn't.

Couldn't.

She needed Jason and this weekend. It was a genius idea on his part, really. Totally genius.


	74. Heat, 8

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Eight**

**December 4****th****, 2009**

**Friday**

They passed the time on the plane by playing trivia games. That was Alexis' idea. Jason's idea was to sit there in silence with a look on his face that said he was picturing her naked.

That did not help to take her mind off of sex so she started to challenge him to different trivia contests. At first he was reluctant to play along but eventually she broke him down. She found out he knew nothing about television. She knew plenty because of the girls and too many nights spent working on legal briefs with the tv playing in the background. Jason did know a lot about geography though. It seemed to be a subject he liked. He didn't care about art. Didn't get it. Didn't care about pop culture. Hadn't heard of half the bands out. He did know about sports though. Of course that was one contest that Alexis was sunk at. She didn't know her field goal from her line drive. She was more of rugby girl but that never took off in America.

She asked him, a couple hours into the flight, "Am I driving you crazy with these games?"

"Its fine."

"You don't seem to be enjoying them as much as I am."

"Its interesting to know what you like."

"You know one thing I like a lot? Coffee every morning. If I don't have it, I can't function right at all. I'll be walking into walls and calling you Milo or Molly or something else bizarre. So I don't know what your plans were for the ride between the airport and beach house but mine are to stop at a grocery store."

"Okay."

"We've never vacationed together before. I couldn't imagine what crazy circumstances would have caused us to. No doubt something to do with your best friend and mine and another vow renewal. But since it never happened that way, tell me how you are on vacation. Do you sleep in? Do you get up and work out anyway? Keep to a schedule or throw away the alarm clock?"

"I just go with the flow. Whatever."

"Laid back."

"Unless I'm working while I'm there."

"Then its not really vacation at all, is it?"

"With my job, no, not really."

"I didn't bring any work this weekend. I assume you have no associates in Aruba to drop in on?"

"No."

"So I picked a perfect locale. A mob free zone."

"I didn't say that, Alexis."

She rolled her eyes. "I should have known better."

"It doesn't matter. We're not leaving the beach house."

She gave him a smile. "So much for seeing the sights. Souvenirs. Shopping. You sure know how to show a woman a good time, Jason."

"Yeah."

Just that one word, murmured in a low throated voice, sent her body on fire again. "How long till we land?"

"Too long."

"We should have went to Jersey," she said.

He chuckled.

She really loved that sound. It was soothing. Like all was right in the world if Jason was happy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

When she relaxed, she was fantastic. Jason couldn't get enough of seeing this side of her. Usually he saw her at times before when she was highly stressed.

In court. Fighting with Carly. Upset over Sonny. Worried about her kids. Mad at Jason over Sam. Pissed about Jerry. Crying because her sister died. Holding her sick daughter, begging for a miracle from God. In a burning building. Frantic because her daughter was kidnaped. Battling cancer. Giving birth in the middle of a train crash.

There was always something to rage against, something to fear, something to yell about or cry over.

That was just their lives. And Jason and Alexis lives overlapped most at times of crises.

But now there was no pain, no heartbreak, no mob war, no anger between them, no lingering regrets about each other, no misery to overcome so that the next day they could even put one foot in front of the other.

Today was their day to just enjoy each other. And they were.

When Jason was in jail he thought and thought about fucking Alexis, and then he started to think of loosening her up- with motorcycle rides, teaching her about imported beer, playing some air hockey- and later, when he got out of lock up, he finally started to think of all the ways he could romance her. Giving her dates. Flowers. Hell, even a dance.

He was that sprung.

He'd give her one dance. Give her that memory. He had no illusions that they would last for the rest of his life. Nothing ever lasted for him. But the hours and days and whatever else Alexis gave him would be good ones.

Good memories. Like this plane ride. He had wanted to take her on a real date- a dinner out somewhere- but that would have to wait. Every minute he couldn't get her out of her clothes, and get his dick thrust deep into her, was now like living through slow torture. They'd eat a restaurant some day. Not this weekend.

Alexis added "I'm glad I didn't say we should go to Japan. We'd spend the whole trip on the plane."

"We could have gotten a suite closer to home."

She looked at him. "And then I wouldn't have had to tell Sonny anything. What was I thinking? Aruba? It must be because its so damn cold in Port Charles right now. The idea of being somewhere warm melted away my good sense."

"How was that? Telling Sonny?"

"I'm sure you heard from him right after."

"Yeah."

"It was....strange. Who would have thought I'd make that call in my life? Who, ever, anywhere, makes that call? Well, I suppose the guests on the daytime talk shows do. Its old hat for them. Calling up an ex to say that you're now going away with his best friend and need him to help with your cover story so your own daughter doesn't know you are sleeping with her ex....hmm....I think we are even beyond Maury or Springer."

"Who?"

She rolled her eyes. "You know, the talk shows where they have topics like You Stole My Man, Mom."

"I don't watch that crap."

"Sonny was speechless. I just hung up."

Jason nodded.

Alexis added "Its not like he has room to judge."

"We're doing nothing wrong."

"Not to Sonny. Now Sam....I don't know."

"She's married. She moved on. And so did I."

"Its just not the normal move a man makes from daughter to mother. Its really quite unseemly."

"It is what it is. I could pretend I don't want you but I don't pretend, Alexis."

"Right. I know that. Very literal minded."

"Yeah."

"All right well....like you mentioned...it is what it is. No use in dwelling on it, right? Most people don't do what we do...most people don't have all these connections between them like we do....all these people important to you that are important to me too...unless people are dating within their own gene pool and you really shouldn't do that, its not advisable at all....so most people are not like us, Jason, but that's fine. We're beyond normal.....and I'm good with that.....being extraordinary is not for the faint of heart but when you are born Cassadine you have very little choice. Helena eats the weaklings first."

Jason gave her a small grin.

They ended up watching a movie for the rest of the flight. It was Closer with Julia Roberts and Jude Law. And it did nothing to make Alexis stop thinking about licking the length of Jason's cock from the base to the tip.

She let out a relieved sigh when the plane touched down.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Everything became about little touches for Alexis as they exited the plane, cleared customs, slid into a limo and headed for the grocery story, then the beach house. Every time Jason placed a hand on her back, or her arm, or brushed his fingers against her cheek, as he tucked stray strands of hair behind her ear, she felt like she was burned where that gentle pressure was applied.

The anticipation of being alone inside the house was making her breathless, tense, her mind race with questions about how good it would be- how great, how amazing, how phenomenal- how he would look, feel inside of her, how she couldn't wait to suck in the smell of his male body till it was all she knew of smell anymore- his unique scent. Imagining his bare chest. Her hands smoothing over it. Licking at his abs. That trail of hair.

They kept to their separate sides of the limo and stayed quiet after the store. The only sound was one or the other of them moving against the leather seat whenever they fidgeted or turned, and their breathing.

When they arrived at the property, the driver made conversation, as Jason told him to take the groceries inside and unpack them. As the man went off to do that, Jason got out their luggage.

His eyes met Alexis, as he slammed close the trunk.

He asked "You okay?"

She nodded. _Okay_? she swore she was being incinerated from the inside out. If she didn't feel his fingers inside of her panties soon she was going to scream in frustration. Her clothes felt heavy on her frame. Like they weighed hundreds of pounds. She just wanted them off and off now.

Jason took the luggage inside while Alexis stood there, in the moonlight, and looked at the beach house. It was beautiful. Luxurious. She could hear the ocean in the distance. Her sweater was roasting her now. She should have dressed for here not Port Charles. Blame it on her sex addled brain. She had only been thinking of naked Jason earlier this afternoon. She was lucky she remembered to even pack more than lingerie in her luggage.

Slowly Jason walked back outside and toward her. His eyes were on her like he was getting ready to make a meal out of her.

_Yes, please do_, she thought, as her pussy twitched. She squirmed slightly and let out a short breath.

As he reached her, his hands went to her hips, she gave him a small smile. "So....we're really doing this, aren't we, Jason?" she whispered "Come what may next week and all the weeks after in our working and personal relationship.....we are doing this here and now....and we're never going to regret this weekend....at least I will not allow regrets to ruin this for me.....and I hope you never do either."

His mouth captured hers in a hot kiss, as he pressed her against the limo, and then he ground out "No regrets."

His blue eyes that were dark with hunger, staring down at her in that moonlight, were an image that would forever live in her memory.


	75. Heat, 9

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Nine**

**December 5****th****, 2009**

**Saturday- slightly after midnight**

Jason paid and tipped the limo driver.

He looked at Alexis, who was standing there in jeans and a red sweater, holding her wool coat, her purse and a pair of black leather gloves. Looking prim and proper, except for how flushed her face was, how shallow her breathing was, how her nipples were poking against her sweater like an invitation for him to push the cashmere up and lick and suck at her lace covered breast till it was wet, red, and glistening in the moonlight.

Damn. He had wanted her for months now. Wanted her since the first time he glanced down her blouse- that pale peach silk button up she had under her suit jacket, and glimpsed the swell of her breast. That was all it took. Suddenly he had to have that breast in his hands. Had to.

She filled up his mind from that day on.

He didn't try to stop it. Why would he? The fantasies were hot as all fuck. He needed them when he was locked up. And then she was there, every day, being his defense attorney and fueling more fantasies for him.

There were times he feared he would be convicted- have to leave everyone behind that he loved- and he needed something to hang on to then. Something to believe in.

His something, his someone, his salvation, became her. She kept him out of Pentonville and she kept his mind off of thinking about the worse case scenario as much as he could have been thinking about it if his attorney was Diane.

Alexis.

No one on earth could convince Jason this was wrong. He reached out and took her hand, leading her inside of the beach house.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

His hand slid into hers for the first time ever in her life. It felt so damn right to have him holding her hand. Safe.

And it felt powerful too. Like together they would be a force unlike any other that this world had ever known. There was nothing to fear anymore. Nothing to run from. No need to hide from her own heart. No need to be careful just in case. No need to make sure she was cautious this time.

She was sure. Confident. This is what she wanted tonight for herself and there was nothing that would stop her now from claiming it as her own. Him as her own. At least for a weekend, Jason Morgan belonged to Alexis Davis.

They had shared kisses already. Teasing kissing. Begging kisses. Tender, exploring kisses. Tongues dueling for dominance kisses.

Jason had wrapped both his arms around her from behind. He had intertwined their fingers while they kissed.

But never had he held her hand as they walked somewhere, like he did now. That feeling, him leading her toward the beach house, and then inside the door, left her dizzy. All of the hunger she was feeling had her brain overloaded. Her body hot to the touch. Her mind in a daze.

It was hard to get in a full breath, hard to walk, talk, think, hard to know her own name, hard to remember why she didn't want to do this the first time he suggested it. Hard to walk those few steps from the driveway to the house without stopping and kissing Jason right then and there.

As soon as the door closed behind them, she dropped her coat, purse and gloves onto the wood floor, flinging them like they were snakes in her arms. At the same time Jason cupped her face with his hands and they started kissing with a desperation that was all consuming.

She broke the kiss. Needing to get out of that sweater before she passed out from the heat. With her eyes on his for a long moment, she grabbed the bottom of her shirt, and then tugged it over her head and tossed it away from herself.

His eyes flared with even deeper desire as he saw her bra clad breasts, snug in a black lace and sitting there waiting for him to caress, to tweak her nipples, for him to lick his tongue over slowly and then fast, take into his mouth and suckle. Do with as he pleased.

In a flash he had his arm around her back, dragging her off her feet, as he started to kiss her again. He was strong enough to carry her like that, as he walked forward, and take them into the living room. Alexis whimpered against his lips as they kissed hungrily.

Her arms were wrapped around his neck.

When he set her down, she let out a protesting moan, her lips were already starting to feel bruised from his demanding kisses. When his mouth was not on hers she felt unsteady, wrong, ill. She needed his kiss right now more than she even needed food, water or air.

His kiss was life infusing.

Jason ground out "Sit down."

In a daze she followed his command, running her hand through her hair as she did. He lifted her foot and slipped off one boot, than the other, tossed them onto the ground, pulled off her socks, let them drop to the floor. His eyes were on hers as he let go of her foot.

Then he kicked out of his own shoes and pulled off his socks. Ripped off his shirt. The image he made was a man filled with an all consuming lust. Barefoot. Shirtless. Raw. Hers.

His belt hit the floor. Alexis let out a breathy sigh.

Threading his fingers into her hair, as he stood near the couch and she sat on it, he bent to kiss her. Then pressed her back, his body on her, as they lay down, their mouths joined. He was a wall of muscle. So hard and powerful.

Alexis ran her hands down his back for the first time. Then scrapped her nails lightly over him, eliciting a moan from Jason that filled her mouth and rang like music in her ears. His kisses moved over her jaw and then onto her neck. He sucked at the skin over her collarbone.

She hadn't been this out of her head for a man in so long. She felt like her full self again. Every part of her- not just the lawyer, friend, and mommy parts- were alive right at that moment.

He pulled her into a sitting position again, reached around her and undid her bra. She slipped out of it, breathing erratically. Her breasts were heavy and aching to be held, massaged, loved by him.

She watched him as he did just that. His thumb stroking over her nipple and then his hands closing over both her breasts. Sensations wracked her whole body. Because it was Jason...the killer, the friend, the guy who knew her history and didn't throw it in her face, who thought she was amazing for all she did, not ruined because of her sins and crimes and weakness....because it was him, it was so much hotter.

Alexis had no idea it would feel like this. His hands on her made her quiver with desire. She was so wet that he would have no doubt how he affected her by the time he was pulling her panties off. He would discover a soaked piece of lace with the scent of her need for him clinging to it.

He had both her breasts in his hands, his fingers working her nipples, and then he was licking at them. She threw her head back and moaned loudly. He stroked his tongue over her breast as if there was nothing else on earth he wanted to taste more.

That was until he drug her jeans off and her underwear. His eyes honed in on her slick wet folds. The hunger in his eyes was unmistakable.

She couldn't believe how this felt. Knowing how intensely he wanted to taste her sweet, feminine liquid heat. She gulped.

He was nearly panting with desire. His eyes were burning with white hot lust. Jason was like a man possessed....obsessed...drive by primal needs that he couldn't ignore. He made her feel the full power of her beauty for the first time in years. Finally she wasn't some dirty little secret like with Floyd (and he wasn't her embarrassing incident, because she wanted this too much to be apologetic right now to anyone who didn't like the idea), and he wasn't her mistake like Jerry. He wasn't her insane, romantic fantasy like Ric. Bound to break apart her soul if she wasn't careful.

He was different than all of them because he Jason. This man who she knew for too many years to count up and who was driven by the same emotions she was- to fight and protect himself and his family at all costs. But protecting himself left him lonely and protecting them left him scarred. Just like her.

Tonight they would shed their roles and be two adults enjoying carnal pleasures.

His hands gripped both her legs and eased them backwards so that they were slightly bent, opening her up for him, and then he brought his lips close to her lips, nearly kissing her and making her let out a soft murmur when he went to her ear instead and whispered "You're so wet for me."

His hand slid down her stomach and the over her skin till he was running a finger through that wetness, as she shuddered against him. His lips sucked and nibbled her ear, his tongue sweeping over the curvy shell, and then his mouth made a meal of her throat. All the while his finger was gently teasing at her till she was pushing her hips up- hoping to get more friction.

Her hands were holding the back of his jeans, clutching them tightly, as she felt herself slipping further and further from rational thought. Becoming a woman just as possessed as this man who was caressing and kissing her body was.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

This is what he wanted. Needed. Craved.

Her taste on his lips as he sucked on that delicate neck of hers. His hands free to massage those ample, round, luscious tits. To suck them till she was tugging his hair and her moans were filling his ear- like they had earlier. Making him feel powerful because he got her to lose control

She wasn't pushing him away anymore. He could take her anyway he wanted to. As fast or slow as he wanted. She was his tonight. He was free to rip her panties off her. Like he owned what was hidden beneath that lace.

Her pretty black panties that were drenched because she was burning hot with lust over him.

What a fucking turn on.

Now he could tease her with his soft strokes over her pussy. Make her crazed and desperate. She would know what he felt for three long months in lock up. Know what this ache was like.

She kept lifting her hips and pushing against his fingers as he would lessen the pressure to a butterfly soft stroke till she relaxed and then increase the pressure till her head was flopping back and forth the couch, and she was lifting those hips again. Whimpering.

_Beg for it, Alexis,_ he thought, with a smirk as he lightly circled her clit a few times. She dug her nails into his back and he let out a yelp.

Moving his eyes to where he could look down and into hers, he saw they were glittering with her desire for him. It was sexy as all hell. Suddenly games stopped meaning a thing.

She'd beg for him later. When he was satisfied and could hold out, going slow and teasing for hours if it took that, running ice over her nipples, pouring wine on her pussy and sucking it off of her, making her feel like he prayed she never felt before in her life.

So she wouldn't want this to be a one weekend thing.

He had been thinking about this for months. He wanted her clenched around him now. And he wanted her to want him next week. To know her legs would wrap around his back over and over. That the two of them would keep feeling this alive and connected.

Jason went without sex for way too long to be sane about it once he got with someone as gorgeous, breathtaking and alive as Alexis.

He sunk a finger inside of her. Her whole body arched as she cried "Yes!"

He started to work that finger in and out of her delicious heat, while he watched her face so he could revel in her pleasure. Another finger joined that one. He didn't waste time now with going slow or teasing her. His strokes were fast as he sunk into her.

Breathlessly she moaned and told him "Yes, yes, like that. Just like that."

Kissing down her body, enjoying the taste of her overheated, fragrant skin he made his way till his mouth was between her legs. Once again he sucked in the smell. Still pumping into her with his fingers, he kissed her thighs and mound. Then licked over her clit.

She bucked her hips upwards, forcing his face to mash against her. He sucked at her clit. That act was making him wild. To know he got to do that to her. This buttoned up lawyer who used to focus her glare on him and say she wasn't buying his stories and she knew what he was trying to pull.

And she always did. She was always his equal. And now she was the woman who let him make her this out of control.

Her walls clutched around his fingers, gripping him tightly, as she exploded into an orgasm.

"OH, FUCK! Fuck, fuck, fuck, ohhhhhhhhhh!" she cried and he wondered if she even knew what she was saying or doing. She was withering around and shaking like crazy as her orgasm ripped through her lithe frame.

He pulled his fingers out and took one long awaited lick through her juices then drove his tongue into her so he could taste her cum as she gushed.

Her hands grabbed his head and pushed him against her. He could feel her start to convulse in another orgasm.

"FUCK, Jason! Fuck! Don't stop! Oh! Oh! OH!"

Stop. Never. He could feast on her for days because she tasted that damn good. Her juices flooded his mouth. Delicious. He couldn't wait till he could make her come again.


	76. Heat, 10

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Ten**

**December 5th****, 2009**

**Saturday- around 1 am **

Her body shook with the force of her first orgasm and then another hit her- making her scream curse words like a sailor, instead of royalty.

But Alexis could careless about looking prim and proper. What she cared about was that Jason was completely into getting her off. Into pleasuring her. Into licking her dripping slit. Into sucking her clit.

There was nothing perfunctory about what he was doing. His tongue had replaced the fingers that had been pistoning in and out of her. The thought of this man- strong, cold, silent, emotional but trying so hard to never appear so- with his head between her thighs, her juices covering his face, and him moaning softly as she bucked hard against him got her even hotter than she would have been if he was just some random man she picked up at a bar.

There was nothing uncomplicated about this.

This was Jason. Hot, sexy, dangerous as all fuck, Jason. And he was still licking and sucking her...Oh, God....it was just too much. Too much. He had to stop. She was too sensitive. Her mind was spinning. She barely came down from her high when his tongue moved to her clit. A few light flicks and she was screaming some more "Ohhhhhhh!"

He swirled his tongue over that pleasure center.

"Jason!" Her voice was a warning. She couldn't take anymore of this. It was too good. She needed to be filled by him. Feel him sunken deep into her, stretching her, filling her up until she couldn't take anymore. "Now! Now, now, now....please....Oh, God. Fuck me!."

She was breathless. Her body was arching upwards so much that her hips weren't even resting on the couch anymore.

He wasn't done with her yet though. His tongue took one more long swipe over her sex. Then he moved up her body, pushing one knee so it was bent toward her chest, and then drove three fingers into her. "One more, Alexis. Come for me....one more time."

Her body was strumming with sensations. She was shaking and shivering, panting, thrashing. The feel of him stretched against her. His muscles, his smell, his mouth kissing her jaw and neck while his fingers drove into her. She was lost in an erotic fog.

Finally the last of her control slid away. Stars formed behind her eyes and her third orgasm was mind shattering. She wasn't Alexis- Mom, lawyer, best person, Aunt. No she was just a woman with a man feeling like she was sexy and wanted and hotter than she could remember feeling in years.

Her walls clutched him this time and he kept his fingers there till she was completely relaxed, then he slid them out, kissing her lips softly as he did. She lay there with her eyes closed. Her heart pounding like a drum. Her skin flushed and her breathing coming in gasps.

A full minute passed before she opened her eyes and looked at him. His face was right next to hers, as he lay against the back of the couch. Her breathing was still labored as their eyes met. She licked at her lips.

His eyes were a deeper blue than usual. Hunger rested in their depths. For her. All her.

It was power at its purest form to be able to make a man like him want her. She loved this feeling. She wanted to give him just what it gave her.

The knowledge of being lusted after to an insane degree.

Rolling onto her side, she threw her leg over his hip. She was completely naked while he had on jeans still. Her nails raked down his chest. He let out a moan. His eyes closed just over that small pleasure and his head fell back. She kissed his neck and down his chest. Scooting slightly lower, she licked at his nipple.

Jason jerked and moaned again. Alexis could feel his erection straining the fabric of his jeans. She tugged his nipple into her mouth and flicked her tongue over it.

His fingers threaded tightly into the back of her hair. She licked, sucked, and nibbled on that nipple till he was moaning in a sort of half-pleasure and half pain. Her nails stroked across his hard, wash board abs.

Her own nipples were heavy, hot, and aching to be thrust into his mouth again. But she wanted to give him some of the delicious pleasure he had given her first.

Alexis went to unbutton Jason's jeans and he stopped her. She looked up at him.

He ground out "Bedroom."

Jason slowly eased himself upright and then stood up. He picked Alexis up, before she could even make a move to stand herself, and headed for the stairs. Naked, exposed and vulnerable, she lay her head against his shoulder.

They cleared the top stair, in the darkened house, and Jason headed down the hall. He found the master bedroom, went inside and lay her on the bed. She watched as he stripped off his jeans and grabbed a condom out of his wallet.

She sat up and moved to the edge of the bed. Placing her hands on his boxers, she tugged them down, revealing his long, thick manhood. Her mouth watered at the sight of him. She always had a thing for men who were well endowed and Jason had that trait working for him overtime.

Alexis took his dick into her hands and stroked it.

"Uhhhhh," he groaned with pleasure. It was clear he wanted to fuck her and fuck her now. He ripped open the condom. "Tell me what you want," his voice was thick with lust as he demanded to hear her say she wanted him as much as he wanted her.

"You, Jason. I want you. I need you. I'll die if I can't have you right now. Not one minute from now." She licked at his dick, circling the head of it. "Now."

Alexis took the condom from him and sheathed him with it.

He pushed her back gently, so that she was laying with her feet on the ground, and then he lifted her legs and threw them over his shoulders. Taking his dick in his hand he teased her slit.

"Three months," he ground out. "Every day .... for three months.....I wanted to have this. You."

He pushed inside of her and she felt her body taking him in. At first it was just the tip of him. She ached for more and moved her hips upward, trying to get him to thrust deeper, as she moaned, grabbing her own breasts.

Her body was slick with sweat now and her breasts were sticky from his saliva.

He pushed in a little deeper.

"So good, Jason."

Shallowly he thrust, and she could see the supreme effort it was taking to not just slam into her and fill her to the hilt. Pleasure ripped through her with every stroke. She twisted and tweaked her own nipples while her eyes stayed on him.

His muscles strained with the effort. His was flushed, breathing hard, and his eyes were on their joined bodies.

XXXXXXXXXXX

He couldn't get over it. Her pussy was taking in his dick. For a long minute he couldn't tear his eyes away from that sight, as he gently stroked a few times inside of her.

Alexis Davis had been so many different things to him over the years. Through all the crazy times she was always reserved and rarely, if ever, sensual in his presence. Not wanting to let down that wall, she carried her sexiness like something she wasn't even aware she had.

This powerful, intense, closed off around him before the last few days, woman was letting him fuck her. It blew his mind.

He could feel his dick throbbing painfully, eager to get deeper inside of her, to thrust hard and fast, to come quick after wanting to come inside of her for months and months.

With that thought taking over his mind, he grabbed her hips, and sunk the full length of himself into her warm, silky heat.

"Ohhhhh!" That word became a strangled moan as she bucked on the white cotton sheets. Moonlight fell over her nude, withering body.

She was twisting her nipples. Hot, dripping and desperate for him, just the way he wanted her to be. "You feel so tight. Unhhhhh.....God, Alexis." His teeth were clenched as he waited for to adjust to him.

He knew how large and thick he was, compared to most guys, and how that affected a woman. How addicted to his dick a chick could become. He would make this good for Alexis so that she didn't have a choice but to want him again later on tonight and then in the morning and then tomorrow and then next week, next month. He didn't plan far ahead but he wanted her in his bed...his...letting him fuck her and make her scream...for a good long while.

Alexis started to move her hips and then Jason stroked into her slowly for a few minutes. When she was moaning and begging "Faster. Please. Oh, God, its so good. So good. Faster, Jason," he sped up his strokes and then they were really going at it.

For a good half an hour, with her legs over his shoulders, he fucked her until finally he pulled out.

She was breathless, hoarse, and too far gone to say anything when he crawled onto the bed.

She moved up next to him, with her head on the pillow, and Jason slowly entered her again. Now he kissed her over and over as he worked her into a frenzy again.

"Jason. Jason. Jason. Mmmmm. Yes. Oh, oh," she whispered between kisses.

Her nails dug deep into his back.

His mouth moved to her ear as he kept thrusting into her in a slow, sweet rhythm now. Breathing against her ear he ground out "It feels so good to fuck you. You're so hot....sexy...perfect....you feel so tight. Do you know how much you fucking turn me on?"

He increased his speed.

Jason wanted to make sure Alexis knew it was her...her body, her mind, her fire, her strength, her beauty, everything about her....that got him hot, made him crave her and this. She was a sexy fantasy come true for him and he wanted no doubt in her mind about that.

He was getting close. So damn close. He could feel himself about to come. Moans and grunts fell from his lips. Her heels pressed into his back. With one last deep thrust into her he came and felt her clench around him a moment later. As he let out a low throated "Uhhhhhhhhh-nnnnnn," Alexis screamed his name, the sound ripping itself out of her body as she shook with bliss, "JASON!"

A smile curved his lips when he finally relaxed against her. Jason. He wanted to hear her screaming that again and again and again.

Still buried inside of her, he rested his head in the crook of her neck, warm, satisfied and content for the first time in a couple of years.

He wasn't into random sex. It had to mean something. With Alexis it did.


	77. Heat, 11

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Eleven**

**December 5th****, 2009**

**Saturday- around 2:30 am **

Alexis rode Jason with a frantic intensity. A shaft of moonlight cut over their bodies.

His large, warm, strong hands were massaging her breasts. Her two hands rested behind her body on his thighs.

"Yes. Yes. Yes. Mmmmm, Jason."

This is what she had been missing in her world. The powerful feeling that came from knowing she was a sexy woman who a gorgeous, muscle bound guy wanted to fuck so bad that he would take her anywhere she asked on the planet just to get the chance to slide one finger beneath her lacy panties.

And she had let him do much more than that. She let him feast on her. Lick, suck, nibble her breasts till she was slick all over, sweaty, dripping with juices, rubbing her thighs together to get friction in her jeans, and then she let lick, suck, and nibble her sweet, moist folds, thrust his tongue inside of her there, swallow down her cum, kiss her with her taste on his lips.

The way he was hot for her was a major turn on to Alexis. It made her feel as sexy as she used to before everything went off track in her life. Before she lost her confidence in her own sexiness because her ex-husband made a joke of their marriage.

She tried to find this feeling again with Jerry, Floyd, other men she regretted who were better left unmentioned. But she couldn't. Her mind couldn't relax enough with them to totally lose control and she couldn't connect emotionally with them to feel like she did now. Strong. Sexy. Fierce. A woman in all her sensual glory.

It took Jason to give this back to her.

The feel of his manhood- so long and thick- buried deep inside of her was making her wild. And he was just as far gone. His hands on her breasts were increasing their pressure, sending delicious shocks straight to her the center of her where they were joined together.

"Oh, God, Jason!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

The sound of her crying out in pleasure made Jason want to take over their love making. Want to control their speed and rhythm and make her come over and over until she couldn't even speak.

He flipped her onto her back.

With one smooth stroke he entered her again. For months he had fantasized about her, how it would feel to have himself deep in her heat, surrounded by her sticky wetness, but it was better than any fantasy.

Hotter. Wilder.

Because she never acted like she was unsure that this is what she wanted. Alexis wanted this one hundred percent. She was eager for it. For him. Begging for him to send her over the edge. And that is just what he would do- as many times as she let him.

Stroking slowly, he ground out "That good?"

"So good. So...good....just like that. Yes. Yes. Yes! Ohhhhhh," her words turned into loud, breathy moans.

For a while longer he went slow but watching her beautiful, flushed, hard nippled, body withering beneath him and hearing her moans made him have to speed up their pace. His dick thrust faster and harder into her tight wet heat. She started to lay kisses on his neck and shoulders. Desperately she kissed and sucked on his skin, while digging her nails into him.

He'd bear scratches tomorrow but he didn't care. She could wound his body anyway she wanted just as long as she didn't hold back.

"FUCK! FUCK, FUCK! OHHHHHHHH!"

He couldn't get enough of buttoned up, attorney at law, always in control, Alexis Davis cursing and begging to be fucked.

He started to tense up. Grunts came out his mouth as he got close to coming. The headboard hit the wall loudly over and over. "Alexis. Uhhhh."

She body shook as her orgasm rocked her. Feeling her clutching his dick, Jason couldn't hold back a moment longer and exploded, shooting his cum as he let out a long moan.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Exhausted, she fell asleep curled against him, her leg thrown over his. When Alexis woke up the next day her eyes fluttered open to see she was alone in bed. Looking at her watch she found it was nearly noon.

It was years since she slept in so late.

Her body felt sore, as she stretched, but it was a sweet kind of soreness that brought a smile to her lips as she remembered the way she got that way. Wrapping a sheet around her she made her way to the master bath, a luxurious room with marble floors, a huge tub with jets, and a steam shower.

Ditching the sheet she climbed into the shower where she found that Jason had left body wash. She let hot water wash over her for twenty minutes and then flipped the shower off, grabbed a towel from the nearby rack, dried off and wrapped it around herself. She grabbed another for her hair and wrapped it up. Then she headed back into the bedroom to find clothes.

Alexis startled at the sight of Jason sitting on the bed, with the TV on. Seeing her he lifted the remote and flipped it off. His piercing blue eyes met hers.

The moment held and lingered.

Her body started to heat up just from the intense, probing, hungry look in his eyes. But there was more than just lust there. She saw concern.

This morning after stuff could be complicated. Alexis let out a short breath.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

He had to fight the urge to not peel off his jeans and t-shirt and climb into the shower with her. Jason didn't want to assume anything though.

Alexis had been going back and forth about them in her mind before their trip to Aruba. Was she back to being unsure?

After the way they connected last night he didn't want to take five steps back. But that would be her call. Jason couldn't force her to feel comfortable. Or to be as into him as he was into her.

"Hey," he said.

"I could have used someone to wash my back. But, I suppose, there's always tomorrow morning."

A small grin tugged on his lips.

She looked around and then asked "My luggage? Still in the foyer? If I remember correctly we got distracted before we unpacked."

"I brought it up. Check the closet."

"Thank you."

"No problem."

He watched her go over to the large walk-in closet and disappear inside. He decided to give her privacy to dress. But as he was heading for the door he saw her drop the towel.

Jason froze. His eyes worked from head to toe over her slightly wet, trim, gorgeous body. The towel around her hair went next. She used it to dry her hair further and then dropped it.

He swallowed hard.

She was turned away from him. He really should leave and let her change without an audience.

He said "I'm going to go make some breakfast." His tone had this glint of determination. He made his feet head for the hall but his eyes stayed on her.

She looked over her shoulder. "You could do that or you could join me in that huge shower in there in about twenty minutes....or thirty....you decide. I'm willing to compromise on that point."

Ripping off his shirt, he headed for the closet. Off went his shoes. Soon she was in his arms, he was lifting her off the ground, and their mouths were meeting in a torrid kiss.

She was so damn sexy that he couldn't even think about anything but fucking her. It had been that way since he first snuck a peek down her blouse. Each day she filled up his head more.

Now that Jason knew just how good it was with Alexis he wondered how'd he ever get back to his old life- back to work and dealing with his responsibilities- because the day was not long enough to get all that done and also spend at least four hours buried inside of her too.

XXXXXXXXXXX

He ended up turning her around to face the wall, kissing her neck, rubbing her clit and slipping his fingers into her, as his other hand massaged her breast roughly until she was gasping with breathless pleasure and telling him "Find a condom now."

When he stepped back she immediately missed the warmth of his body pressed to hers. On shaky legs she left the closet, climbed onto the bed and got on her knees and elbows.

She heard a low moan escape Jason's lips and the next thing she felt was him getting on the bed. He leaned over her- his hard, thick, erection brushing her ass- and nibbled on her earlobe. He breathed out "This how you want it?"

"Mmmm-hmmm."

"How bad?" He licked at her ear.

"I'm aching for you. Take me, Jason. Fuck me from behind."

Straightening he took himself in his hands, as she looked back at him, and then she watched as he slid himself into her. Bliss rippled through her body as he slowly filled her. Grabbing her hips he started a rhythm. "Oh, yeah, Alexis," he groaned in a low throated voice.

For long minutes he thrust deep into her until her moans and words were running together in a stream. "Ohhhhh, fuck, ohhhhhhh, yes, fuck me like that, ohhhhhhhh, God, Jason! JASON! OHHHHHHHH!"

She felt so right. Tight, hot, slick, perfect. Just like he liked. She felt like she was made for his dick.

Seeing Alexis like this- in a wild, out of control, frenzy of lust- had him speeding up his strokes.

When he slipped his hand around her and worked her clit, she squealed in a way he had never heard before, and that sent him into a bucking, hard orgasm. She screamed his name and started to come too.

"JASON!"

He was getting real used to her doing that. And he liked it.

God, how he was liking fucking her. So much so that he thought he should buy this beach house in Aruba so he could bring her here any weekend she could get away and fuck her for two days straight each time.

They ended up collapsing on their stomachs on the bed, both wearing smiles, and completely out of breath. Turning her head to look at him, Alexis asked "Can you remind me why I thought this was a bad idea?"

Jason just chuckled.


	78. Heat, 12

**Heat**

**Note-** you will notice in all my stories that Alexis home is heavily guarded. I have no idea what Guza is thinking but this summer has made it especially clear Alexis has no gaurds. I find this unacceptable.

**Chapter Twelve**

**December 8th, 2009**

**Tuesday**

Diane breezed through the door of Alexis' home. She gave a cursory glance at the gaurd standing outside the door and shivered visibly at his hotness. She scrunched her nose in a way that said: Delicious.

Alexis was drinking wine on her couch after a long day. She had waved Diane inside.

Diane said, as she slipped out of her coat, "Pour me a glass and then tell me every decadent detail of your weekend with that sex god. Leave nothing out."

Alexis gave her a stern look.

Diane raised an eyebrow and whispered "What? Are the kiddies home? Send them for ice cream with Niko....by the way, YUM!.....because I have to hear about this. You know I haven't been getting any since Max and I ended our relationship. Not that I would want any from him now anyway. I wouldn't take him back if he got down on his knees and kissed my Manolo Blahniks. That man is a liar. Sorry, but he is. I realize he is married to your daughter but that is case in point in why he is a liar. He swore he was uninterested in marriage, like I am. I'm just glad I ended it with him. If it had been the other way around then I just could not show my face in that coffee house again. Dumped for a younger woman. Not I." She shook her finger. "No. Not I."

"You were long through with him when Sam and Max became involved."

"Exactly! Much as Sam was long through with Jason when you decided to make him your hot little afternoon delight." Diane took a glass of wine from Alexis. She kicked off her shoes and sat down. "So are the kids home or can we grown ups talk dirty?"

"Kristina and Molly are both at Sonny's house tonight. Don't ask me if I'm freaking out." She raised her glass of wine. "This is my third glass. They should be home in an hour. At least I pray they are."

"It really does seem to be doing them well to bond with him. I know that seems counter intuitive. Bonding with a mob boss is good for the soul? But I suppose that underneath the gun, rap sheet, and long list of unpaid for criminal offenses he is also a father and uncle. And that means something, at least to them."

"It means the world to them. I know I'm risky their health every time they see him but I was damaging their psyches when they didn't. It's a trade off. I trust Milo with them. He's their personal gaurd now from 3 to 10 each school night. They are allowed to go to Sonny's only when its pre-approved visitation time. Its working out okay so far."

"Good. Now about your sex stud-"

"Could you kindly not call him that?"

"Why? Isn't he one? Look at him. The way the women who have been with him carry on about him, he must be.....amazing." She drug out the last word. "Tell me my fantasies are accurate. Is he a little domineering? Whips? Handcuffs? Oh....." she shivered "I can hardly take it. Tell me!"

Alexis rolled her eyes. "Down, girl."

"I know you didn't back out at the last second because you're completely glowing. Good sex is better than any facial on earth."

"I didn't back out. Maybe I should have. Maybe that would have been wiser but wise and me? Not really all that close. We stopped speaking years ago, in fact. Right around the time I met Jerry, I'd say."

"Oh my Lord, are we doing this? Really?"

"What? Doing this what?"

"Second guessing your decision. Please tell me you are not berating yourself-"

"There is no berating going on."

"Good! Because you did the right thing. You wanted to have hot monkey sex with Jason and you had hot monkey sex with Jason...I assume. I am still awaiting details."

"You are not getting any details. Jason would never be able to look you in the eye again if you brought it up to him."

"I won't blab. Cross my heart! I swear on my spanx and push up bra!"

"You always blab. That's what you do. You're a blabber."

Diane made a face. "True." She took a drink. "Unless it comes to one of my clients and then I am Stone Cold, pun intended. So be my client. Give me a dollar and then tell me every nasty, debauch thing that man did to you."

"No."

"No?"

"Its private."

"Oh, I get it. He had performance issues, right? A shame. A finely tuned male machine like that can't get started."

"He more than got started, believe me."

"Just answer me one thing then. How many orgasms did you have?"

"I wasn't counting, Diane. Who counts?"

"That many, huh? What are you doing here tonight? While the kiddies are away the mommy should play. Get over to that man's penthouse and rip his clothes off with your teeth."

"Jason is working tonight. Besides.....I can't say for sure we will be more than client and attorney now."

Diane's face fell. "What happened? Was there a falling out already?"

"We decided to not discuss the status of our affair, for lack of a better term, until we came home. The last I saw him he was putting me in a cab at the airport and rushing off to handle some kind of mob emergency."

"Was there a good bye kiss?"

"Not even a peck."

"Not a good sign."

"Well it is what it is. The weekend was fantastic. It probably makes more sense to just leave it at that. We got it out of our systems."

"Are you sure the sex was rocking because you sound like you don't want another weekend with him?"

"If our lives were simpler I would, of course, want lots and lots of weekends like this last one. I mean we were all over that beach house. The pool, the hot tub, the shower, the kitchen counter and table and floor. It was completely intoxicating. But I'm not a college student. I'm not carefree. I have children to consider. I have a daughter who used to love Jason, for God sake's. I have my career to focus on. I have a very full life. So if that life doesn't include a personal relationship with Jason then it simply doesn't."

"You want to sleep with him again so bad you can taste it."

Alexis gulped down her wine. "Yes, I do. But am I courting disaster?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason was starting to feel old.

He walked into his apartment, kicked closed the door, set the alarm and then winced as he took off his leather jacket. He reached into the closet for his lock box, wincing some more. Good God. He thought he was in great physical shape.

But two days of mind blowing sex and then getting caught in a shoot out today had really left his body feeling strained. He was glad that the skirmish on the docks ended quickly. He didn't think he was up for chasing down guys in a boat- like he had done before- and jumping from his boat to theirs. Then getting in a hand-to- hand combat situation.

Alexis had exhausted him. But it was a great kind of exhausted. His bones ached.

After putting away his gun, he made his way to the couch, laid down, let out a groan, and then turned on the tv to the news. He didn't plan on moving till morning.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hours later he was woken up by someone beating on his door. "PCPD. Open up!"

Jason drug himself off the couch.

The cop banged on the door some more.

"All right!" Jason snapped., still sore as hell. "Fuck," he muttered. He pulled the door open. "What?"

The cop said "You need to come down for questioning in a shooting that took place earlier this afternoon on the docks. You were spotted there by an eyewitness. We've got you dead to rights this time, Morgan. Why don't you tell me what went down before someone else rolls over on you? Get your side of the story down on record first. Was it self defense?"

"I won't make any statements without my attorney."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Alexis groaned as she reached for her cell phone on her night stand. Grabbing her glasses she read the time. 3:45 am.

She saw the call was from the PCPD. "Alexis Davis speaking."

"Hey, I got brought down for questioning. Sorry about the time but I need to be out of here by morning so I can go to work."

"What are you suspected of this time?"

"There was a shooting on the docks today. Supposedly they have a witness who puts me there."

"We'll just see about that. I'm on my way."

"Thanks."

She crawled out of bed. Well it looked like she would see Jason again today but it wouldn't be for the wild romp she had in mind- like the time he bent her over the couch in the beach house- instead it would be more mundane. Alexis still looked forward to seeing him anyway.

And that was a change from how they were six months ago. The trial had brought them closer, placed them on the same team. It was them against the world now.

Maybe that was reason enough to take the risk of being with Jason Morgan- mob enforcer, ex- of Sam, confidant of Sonny, best friend of Carly....and the man who was becoming a life changer for Alexis.

Time to go get him out of lock up again. Nothing like starting work before the sun even came up. She needed coffee badly.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason sat up a little straighter when Alexis came into the interrogation room. "Hey."

She was dressed in her usual business suit and had her briefcase. Looking completely professional. Her face gave away nothing about how they spent their weekend. She set the briefcase on the table.

"Here's where we stand," she started.

_"There, Jason," Alexis moaned as he took her from behind. He had just hit her g-spot. "Oh yeah, right there. OH! OH! Fuck, Jason! OHHHHHHH!"_

He shook away the memory and tried to focus on what she was saying.

Alexis was in the middle of a sentence. "...be that as it may their case is already falling apart. It seems the eyewitness has rethought her original statement about you being among the men on the docks earlier. She's getting cold feet as the gravity of all this sets in on her. I don't think she'll pick you out of a line up but even if she does her conflicting statements she's made already will work in my favor to impeach her testimony. It won't be hard to make her seem confused-"

_"Harder! Oh, yes. Yes! YES! YES!" Alexis screamed as Jason pumped into her. She was laying on the kitchen table, wearing only his t-shirt, that was pushed up to bare her breasts for his eyes, hands and mouth to devour. "FUCK ME HARDER! OHHH! God! So good! OHHHHHHHH!" Then her head started to thrash and she let out low guttural moans as Jason came._

Jason broke into Alexis' speech about the eyewitness. "Can you get me released soon?"

"Of course. Don't I always? Do the line up and if she doesn't pick you out this is over. If she does then we break her testimony should this comes to trial. Right now you are only looking at unlawful discharge of a fireman anyway. Child's play, really. The police are fishing to see why there was a shootout in the middle of the afternoon on the docks."

"So this won't stick?"

"In the case of charges being filed, I'll wake up a judge and get you bail."

"Thanks."

"Its my job. You pay me well for it. I'll be right back."

He watched her leave the room. His eyes focused on her ass and how the fabric of her skirt hugged it. Such a hot ass. She liked to be lightly spanked. He learned that just before they left for the airport when he was fucking her while she was bent over a desk.

Jason wondered how long it would be before Alexis let him fuck her again. Was she aching for it like he was?

He might be sore still but he would deal with that. Because if she dropped her panties he was not about to miss the chance to slide into her silky, hot heat and thrust hard, fast and rough till she was screaming, like she always did, making her throat raw over him. "JASON!"

God he loved the sound of her coming.


	79. Heat, 13

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter 13**

**December 9th****, 2009**

**Wednesday**

Jason and Alexis walked through the parking lot of the police station at sunrise. The witness had turned into a crying mess and recanted her whole story. Its seems the police talking about witness protection for her after she testified against Jason had freaked her out.

Alexis said to Jason "Just answer me one thing, honestly, about this incident earlier today. Are my children's lives in danger because there is yet another mob war starting up? And right when I have, perhaps foolishly, allowed them greater access to Sonny."

"There's no war. It was just so low level crew from Rochester that thought they could use our docks. They were young hot heads. One pulled a gun and fired. The others took off. I made sure the guy who took a shot at me got the message that they better not come back into Port Charles city limits again."

"So they were testing you?"

"They thought they could pull a fast one. Get in and out quick during the day when people are around. Mix in with the boat traffic. Unload quick and get back out into the harbor. But they got spotted and I went down there to handle it. If not for that guy losing his cool it wouldn't have escalated. He ran off after throwing those shots. I figured out who he was, tracked him down, and let him know how it had to be if he wants to survive."

"Well, lets hope this is the last of them around here. My daughters need as safe as an existence as they can have considering who their father and uncle, respectively, are."

Jason nodded.

They ended up at Alexis car. She unlocked the door and opened it. "Well, its freezing out here so I'm going to go. If you don't mind, can you not get arrested again today? I have other clients to see this afternoon."

"Okay."

"Good bye then Jason." She climbed into her car. Only after Jason walked away did Alexis let out the breath she was holding.

Her heart was pounding fast. Though she treated him just like she used to last week she felt completely different about him now. Her body was hot, throbbing and aching, over seeing him. Her breasts were heavy. Her panties damp. She kept imagining his mouth on her neck and him thrusting into her from behind.

She started her car.

Her fingers covered her mouth. She wanted his kiss again and again and again. She couldn't help wondering if she would mourn losing him if he was really satisfied to leave their weekend at just that. Was it more than her body that was calling out for Jason?

Was some part of her heart opening up to him too?

When he smiled while they were in Aruba he looked as happy as she had ever known him to be. That was something she loved seeing. To know he was without burdens. To know she could get him that way. If they didn't continue their relationship how long would it be till he smiled like that again? Till he felt that free?

And what about her? How long would it take till she had a man who could match her at every level and who knew her so well and who never judged her sins?

Was there any other man who was like Jason?

Alexis didn't think so. She was still confused though about what he wanted, what she wanted and what was realistic for them.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason shut down all day. He had work to do and he couldn't let himself focus on Alexis. So what that she hadn't kissed him or mentioned anything about them on a personal level when they were together at the police station?

That didn't mean she wasn't into him.

He didn't like to speculate about things. He would just have to ask her and find out what she was thinking, then deal with it.

Still, all day long, he felt off-balance. In the back of his mind, the part he tried to not think about, was the fear she wasn't interested in continuing their relationship.

He hated to let women have power over him. It always led to him being wrecked. So he decided to take it like a man if Alexis was good with them not getting together again. Telling himself he did not care one way or the other meant that she could never wreck him.

Around ten at night, he called her. He knew she didn't go to sleep till midnight anyway, on most nights, and she woke up at seven on most mornings. He knew that because she ranted before that he was messing up her sleep with his arrests.

"Hey."

"Hello, Jason. How are you this evening?"

"Good. You got time to talk?"

"Molly is asleep and Kristina is on the computer."

"I wanted to check in with you."

"In a professional sense? Because that nonsense this morning about the dock shootout is a non-starter, I'd say."

"No, not about work."

"Oh."

He asked "Did you like this weekend?"

They had been blissfully happy for every moment they were there and joked the whole ride home. But since they got back it seemed they were just friends again. Jason didn't like the step back for them but if she wanted it then he'd deal with it.

Alexis answered "Very much. Did you enjoy it?"

His voice was deep with hunger when he asked "What do you think?"

"Don't answer a question with a question. That's a deflection method."

"I liked every damn second of it."

"That's good to hear."

He could tell she was smiling as she said that. Sitting at the desk in his office Jason went on "I want to see you again."

"Do you think that's the smartest course of action to pursue?"

He bit back a groan. "Tell me why it wouldn't be."

His dick was getting hard just because he was hearing her throaty voice over the phone, and thinking about the different ways he fucked her all weekend long. He wanted her in his office so he could put her on the desk, rip those panties off her, and make her beg for it as he teased her with his tongue between her legs.

When he sucked her clit she would grab his hair and cry out his name, aching for sweet relief, dying to come all over his face.

Alexis answered "There are a myriad of reasons why it's a foolish idea-"

"Nothing that happened last weekend changed your mind?"

His gut clenched. He couldn't believe he hadn't gotten to her in the slightest. She was back to being cold and stand offish. She had her list again about why they didn't work. He was just about ready to hang up on her. He wasn't about to debate them like this was a effing court case of hers.

"That's the thing, Jason, that I am trying to tell you....there are many reasons why I think it would be smart to not continue on this road but there is one reason that I think quite possibly might mitigate the other factors."

"Tell me what it is."

"Well, it comes down to the fact that....let me start at the beginning... I have my work, of course, and my children, who are the lights of my life, and I have good friends. I've accomplished many things, all of which were tarnished by that jackass Floyd but be that as it may, I did accomplish said things and I think I should still be proud of that but even so-"

"Slow down. You're losing me. I know you're a great lawyer and Mom. But don't you want more for yourself?"

"Exactly! I was saying that. In a roundabout way. That's my reason."

"You want more for yourself then just work and being a parent?"

"Of course I desire more than just work and being a Mom, though both are very satisfying. But that is not my exact reason. The sum total of my reason why I feel like throwing caution and good sense to the wind is.....you make me happy. That's the reason I think we should continue, if you think so too. If not then lets just pretend I didn't say that last thing."

"I want to keep what we have going."

"Oh........that would be agreeable to me," she whispered.

Jason smiled. He could tell she was nervous but that was just who she was. At first she was nervous and then, when she felt safe, she broke free of that and was completely breathtaking in every way. Bold. Fierce. Hot as fuck.

Damn, he wanted her. Now.

Jason asked "Can you get away tonight?"

"Kristina really has turned herself around. I'm sure she could handle being here with her sleeping sister and the gaurds. But I could only be gone a couple of hours. I have to make sure she gets to sleep because she has finals this week. Sometimes she tries to sit up on that computer all night."

"Come to my office."

"Give me twenty minutes."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jason glanced at his watch twenty five minutes later, impatient to see Alexis come through the door. He had already taken his gun off and set it inside the desk drawer. He was itching to pull his dick out, as it was half hard already because his mind kept replaying all the ways he had fucked Alexis in Aruba.

Each time went through his mind. He lingered on his favorites. The moment he kept going back to was the first time she sucked him into her mouth- down on her knees in the steam shower- and then the next time- in the middle of the night in the hot tub behind the beach house. He sat on the edge and she was in the water. There were shrubs that gave them privacy. When her mouth was wrapped around his dick- with one hand working his shaft and one on his balls- he just about hit nirvana.

This strong, intense woman loved to suck his cock- and she was fantastic at it. Jason didn't know how he had even talked her into being with him but he was glad he had because his weekend of fucking her would go down as some of the best sex in his life.

Considering he didn't like to think about his ex-lovers in that way anymore- way too complicated and he hated complications- Alexis was the only woman he imagined naked these days.

She was so much wilder than he ever guessed.

Jason was not the type to ever- and he meant under any circumstances- let a chick slide her finger in his ass. Any who tried got thrown on her back and fucked hard until she was screaming in pleasure and clear on the fact that he didn't go for that. But with Alexis it was all so crazy and hot. Things he didn't do...he did.

He blamed it on the leather bustier she brought and the fact she got his handcuffs on him. Another first for Jason. He didn't like being out of control.

She pushed all his limits and he found himself constantly hitting new levels of sexual satisfaction. Being dominated and then dominating her. They barely found time to eat or sleep. They didn't hardly talk. They would make a meal and fuck on the kitchen table. Fall asleep and wake up to her hands on his dick, or she'd wake up to his mouth on her earlobe.

Even as the cab was in the driveway and the cabbie was knocking on the door, Jason was taking Alexis one last time, bending her over a desk in the living room.

Jason let out a harsh exhalation of air, in frustration, as he glanced at his watch another time. Twenty eight minutes had gone by since he hung up with Alexis. Where was she?

His phone went off. He checked the text message. It read: Let me in.

The front door to the shop was locked. He hurried out there, turned the lock, and opened the door. She walked in, wearing a black trench coat and very high heels. Her bare legs peeked out from the split in the lower half, beneath the belt. Jason's dick got even harder.

He locked the door and reached for her.

She took a step back, out of his reach.

He raised an eyebrow.

She opened the coat. Alexis had on a black and pink teddy. The pink outlined the swells of her breasts. Jason licked his lips.

Their eyes held on each other.

She asked "What do you think? This cost 225 dollars. Highway robbery?"

"A bargain. Buy ten more."

He stalked toward her, grabbed her around the waist and jerked her against him. He took her hand and pressed it against his bulge. Jason ground out "Do something about that."

"Something? What something did you have in mind?" she teased, breathlessly. "Be specific."

"Suck me off."

She dropped to her knees.

Anyone could walk by and look in the window. It was only eleven pm. But Jason didn't give a damn at that moment. Because Alexis was about to deep throat his dick.


	80. Heat, 14

****

Heat

Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon

Chapter Fourteen

December 9th, 2009

Wednesday- 10:45 pm

Jason's knees nearly gave out when he started to shoot cum down Alexis' throat. She was on all fours, in the coffee shop, with his dick deep down her throat. At this angle she couldn't take in most of his cock but at the beach house- one time- she had gotten a good portion of it down her throat. It was the third time she gave him head. Then she was laying on the bed and he fucked her face.

Just the memories of all they had done that weekend, so beyond what he could find with any other woman these days, made him think about how he didn't want to let Alexis out of his life. He didn't want to lose this.

She was fucking phenomenal and Jason knew it.

The sight of her sucking his cock always made him come harder than anything else. It was something about her submitting to him that way that got him off. This buttoned up, intense, brilliant woman taking his cock in her mouth was just mind blowing for Jason.

"UHHHHH," he moaned and grunted as the last of his cum was swallowed by her. She let him slip out of her mouth.

Breathless from the exertion, Alexis slowly got on her feet. Jason jerked up his boxers and jeans and then swept her off her feet, even as she was still wiping her mouth and his cum was dripping down her chin.

He took her into the office. He sat in his chair and sat her on his lap. She leaned her head on his shoulder, idly running her fingers over his abs, on top of his black t-shirt.

Jason was panting, after coming down from his orgasmic high. He leaned his head back on the chair and closed his eyes.

She murmured "It was quite crazy, on my part, to ever consider giving this up."

"Yeah."

She chuckled. "But we aren't in Aruba any longer."

"It'll be all right." His eyes were still closed. His heart beat like a jackhammer. He wasn't sure if that was just physical still or if it was because she always made him freak out when she mentioned them not getting together or staying together.

That had been one of the thrills of being on vacation with her. They made a pact to not bring up what they'd be to each other later. So Jason could relax and just enjoy her body and her company.

After he told her it would be all right she answered "I know you believe that but its not as if this is simple. I mean, if you really think about it, this is as from simple as it comes and its probably going to upset a lot of people."

His eyes slowly opened and settled on her face. He saw the little line between her eyes that meant she was worried. Jason threaded his fingers into her sexy, brown locks and forced her to look into his eyes. "I don't care who don't like us being together."

"You can not care about certain people....who shall remain nameless due to their adverse effects on afterglow....but I have to care about my daughters."

"Think about it, Alexis. You were with Jerry."

"Don't remind me! Diane still wants me to go to therapy over that and discover what makes me behave in ways that are bound to destroy my world."

"He was worse for your kids than anybody else. You and Sam got through that, right?"

"That was a very different situation."

"He could have killed Sam or Nikolas- more than once."

"I know that! I tried to get him locked up. I'm glad that bastard is dead now."

"All I'm saying is that none of your kids blame you for that. They will never hold things against you for long because they need you too much."

Her eyes searched his. "Well that may, in fact, be true but I don't want to hurt them even if they will forgive me for it."

His eyes bore into hers. "I want you."

She smiled slightly. Her voice was light when she said "I realize that but its not the be all and end all for this discussion."

He lifted her up and sat her on the desk. Jason pushed aside the photos, turning them over as he did. Alexis chuckled. Her hand was on the back of his neck as their lips met in a steamy kiss. They both moaned at the same time, giving into the passion that flared between them.

Jason kissed down her throat then closed his lips over her lace covered nipple, sucking deeply for a moment. She was wearing a black and pink teddy. He yanked at the buttons between the legs, revealing her dripping pussy to his eyes. He loved to see her spread open like this for him. He lifted her legs and placed her feet on the edge of the desk.

Alexis sucked in a shaky breath.

Jason ground out "Whatever we got to do to make this work....lets do it." His fingers started to slick over her wetness. "Tell me you won't give up on us." He tweaked her clit and her hips jumped.

"Oh, fuck! OH!"

He kept rubbing her as he demanded, staring down into her lust filled brown wide eyes. "Say you won't throw us away like we're nothing."

Two fingers thrust into her. Her arms were thrown over her head. Her fingers clutched the edge of the desk, stretching her body in a way that uplifted her breasts even more. Making the perky hard nipples point skyward. Jason leaned over and nipped at one. He kept thrusting into her with his fingers. Her body was so tight around him. He wanted to bury his dick in her and fuck her into a screaming orgasm.

Through clenched teeth, as he thrust harder and her ass raised and fell in rhythm with his fingers, Jason said "Damn it, Alexis, tell me this means something to you."

He swore no other woman ever made him like this. He was a man crazed with possessive neediness every time he was around her now. He wanted to more than know he could screw her again. He wanted to know she would be dying for it, aching to get his dick into her again, to feel filled up by him, to be possessed by him, to possess him. He didn't want her able to walk away any time soon.

"OH! OH! OH!" She cried as he bent to suck on her clit. "I need you, Jason! I need you! JA-SON!"

She bucked to a wild, hips thrashing finale against his face, as his fingers were flooded with her warm cum. He slipped his fingers out as she stopped spasming and suctioned his mouth around her to suck. He moaned "Mmmm," sending vibrations against her. She grabbed at his hair and pushed him into her. His tongue darted inside of her until she came again with her legs wrapped tight around his head.

Her thighs were quivering, and sticky, by the time Jason moved away from her. He carried her to the bathroom so they could get cleaned up. He ended up standing behind her in there, with his hands on the sink, trapping her between the sink and his body. They both looked into the mirror.

He said "Don't worry. We can handle this."

She leaned her head back to rest on him. One of his hand moved from the sink, to her stomach, and up to cup her breast, over the lace of the teddy. He massaged it and said "It's worth the hassle."

"When you're doing that I think so too. It's when I'm home alone....oh, don't stop, please.....that I get concerned again....ohhhhhh." She let out a long moan as he twisted at her nipple, pulling it and tweaking it roughly.

Against her ear he whispered "You're so fucking hot. I got to have you."

She moaned as he kept manipulating her nipple. His hard dick pressed against her ass. He still had his jeans on but his erection was straining them.

He knew he promised to not keep her at the coffee shop too long but he just had to fuck her before she left. He'd never sleep tonight otherwise. Jason quickly freed himself from his jeans, opened up her teddy again and rolled it over her ass.

Alexis sucked in a hissing breath. She moved her legs further apart and bent over the sink. That was all the invitation he need to drive into her. He thrust hard and deep, nearly lifting her off the ground with each thrust, and soon she was moaning and murmuring curse words.

"Ohhhhh, fuck, so fucking good, Jason. So good. Fuck, fuck, fuck, ohhhhhhhhhh, yes! Oh yeah.....ohhh, Jason, deeper......OH GOD!"

It didn't take long for him to explode inside of her. They hadn't used a condom this time. It was the first time that happened. They had nearly forgotten before but one of them always brought it up in time.

He loved this raw, bare backed, feeling of taking her without any barrier. It made him come quicker and more intensely. Something primal was unleashed it him and he kept thrusting hard through the orgasm. Finally he was completely spent and let out on last "UHHHHHHHHH," before his body relaxed.

Ten minutes later they were in the coffee shop again and she was putting on her coat. "That was....." she kissed his neck "amazing." Her manicured nails gently raked down his cheek. "If you're worried about repercussions don't be because I'm on the pill and I assure you that I would not be here with you tonight if I didn't know I'm in perfect health. I wouldn't do that to anyone. Especially you. We've known each other too long to disrespect each other that way, right?"

"Right." After a moment he said "I'm sure I'm clean too."

"I never doubted that. Not for a second. Although anyone could have something like that of which to be concerned and work around....I know you would have told me before we spent last weekend together. You let people make their own choices when they have all the facts in evidence, right?"

"Yeah."

She studied his eyes for a long moment. "You okay?"

There was this strange feeling in his chest. He knew what it was but he wished he didn't. It was disappointment. For a few minutes he had thought maybe they got so carried away that they made a child together. He wouldn't ever set out to do that but he wouldn't complain about an accident either.

Jason was not looking to ever bring another kid into this world. It was just that, for a minute or two, he had that hope inside of him that he wouldn't have to decide to be selfish and set out to be a father....that their shared lust and insanity for each other would take care of it for him.

It was better this way though. He couldn't be a good father. He knew that. Liz proved that to him- over and over- and so did life. So did Michael. He tried his best but it was never enough.

"Yeah," he told Alexis. "I'm fine. You better get home and check on Kristina."

"Yes, I better. She needs her rest to keep her grades up. I try not to push but her GPA is so high and it would be a shame to compromise that now. Still I want a happy child more than a high GPA."

"She seems happier lately."

"All because of Sonny, not me."

"Because of you two getting along. You're both her parents. Don't sell yourself short."

Alexis smiled. She gave him a sweet kiss. "You're good for me." She headed for the door and when she reached it she turned the lock. "Good night, Mr. Morgan," she said, primly, playing the part of his lawyer, as she looked over her shoulder and winked.

A grin creased his lips. "Bye."

She walked out and left him there staring after her.


	81. Heat, 15

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Fifteen**

**December 10th****, 2009**

**Thursday**

She knocked on the door.

Alexis was on a mission. One she did not want to be on or particularly look forward to. All right, fine, to be more honest she loathed the idea of doing this but it had to be done.

As soon as breakfast was over, she sent her youngest two daughters off to school then she left the lake house, drove across town and knocked on the door of Max Giambetti's apartment. He had married Sam in Vegas not too many weeks back. They were living at his place for now but looking for a house to buy.

A home to share.

Alexis had her doubts about their union but by the time she heard about it the damage was already done- they were husband and wife- so she had plastered on a shocked smile and tried to be hopeful.

Because Alexis had decided to pursue a sexual relationship with Jason she knew it was imperative that she inform her eldest daughter, who just happen to be his ex-lover, as soon as possible so that Sam did not somehow hear about it from someone else. That would be a disaster of the highest order.

The apartment door opened to reveal Max standing there in just a pair of boxers- and a gun in his hand- looking like he just rolled out of bed, and breathing hard. "Oh hi, Mom!"

She cringed and shielded her eyes. "Um....sorry! I should have called." She glanced at her watch. "Its after nine but I suppose that does not mean the same to everyone...especially newlyweds. This is my fault. My eyes blame me, not you. I should go."

Max said "Well you came by for something. Come on in. You're here already." He looked at himself "Oh! I should...put something...on...excuse me."

Alexis shuffled inside and turned away from her son-in-law. "Brilliant plan! You do that."

As Max left he said "I'll tell Sam you're here. Good to see you again, Mom!"

She let a breath out through her teeth as her lips turned into a grimace. The image of Max in boxers would always haunt her- and not in a good way. She liked him in a suit and calling her "Ms. Davis."

There were bigger concerns to worry about in this moment though.

Sam came walking into the room, in a silk red robe, with her hand threading through her hair. "Hi!"

Her eyes were wide and questioning.

Alexis had always loved when Sam looked that way because, in that second, Sam reminded Alexis of herself. They had often had misunderstandings but that came from their pain and fears, not because they were all that different from each other. They really weren't.

Case in point- they found the same men amazing and worthy of love, over and over. Jax and Sonny and now Jason.

There were a lot more about their personalities that they had in common too. They both were very tough women who liked to face down life by their own means. They liked to know they could take care of themselves. Sam might seem like she let men take care of her but she was working most of those men- she called the shots. And when she finally was completely on her own she survived by taking her finances into her own hands and opening her detective agency. Being in charge in a new, legal, and more empowering way. Alexis was proud of her daughter's growth. She worried about this reckless, quick marriage to a mobster but who was to say that this mobster was not just who Sam needed in her life.

"I'm sorry for interrupting."

"Don't worry about it, Mom. What's up?"

"Um....do you want to sit down? Maybe we should sit. Lets sit."

Sam sat on the couch while Alexis paced. "Something wrong with Molly or Kristina?"

"No."

"Oh, good!"

Alexis kept pacing.

Sam added "You're freaking me out. What has you so worked up?"

"I don't know how to say this to you. Its not something you want to hear or I relish saying."

Sam made a face, filled with concern. "Wait...this isn't the long delayed lecture about how I shouldn't have run off to Vegas and married a guy I just hooked up with two weeks after ending my last relationship, is it? I knew you were biting your tongue about all this!"

"Its not for me to judge who you marry. Though...yes....I do wonder about this choice but it was your choice, you made it, and I respect it. Because who you choose to put in your bed is your, and your alone, business."

"Okay," Sam drug out the word. "I hear a but in there."

"No but. Though this does lead me to the point I came here to discuss, which is, that who I have in my....uh, life.....should also be my business alone. I know that's not completely true though because I am a mother of three and my daughters come first. I would never do anything to knowingly hurt you. I hope you believe that."

Sam stood up. She touched Alexis' arm to make her stop pacing. "I do know that. So just tell me what this is about. You said....you're dating someone new? Did I get that, right?"

Alexis nodded.

Sam smiled and said "Cool! Who?"

Alexis pursed her lips.

Sam made a worried face. "Oh, no.....not Mayor Floyd again?"

"Of course not!"

"Thank God. Okay. Well then who? Jerry is most definitely dead this time. I can't think of anyone else that would be so horrible that you wouldn't want to tell me about it." Her eyes were wide and searching. "Jax?"

"No!"

"Okay. Because I could see that. You two are best friends, after all."

"Would that bother you? You used to be with him."

"A long time ago. And he never loved me like he loves you. It wouldn't be me who imploded at the news, it would be Carly." Sam made her hands look like a bomb going off.

"Yes, I can only imagine. It would be nuclear."

"Exactly! So thank God you aren't with Jax. Hmmmm. Who else? Come on, Mom. Just tell me." She whispered "Milo?"

Alexis mouth gaped.

Sam said, quickly, "No, no way. Sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. He is kinda young and immature still. I mean Milo plays video games till dawn some nights and that's not really your type, age differences aside."

Alexis let out a long breath and then said "Jason."

"Jason?"

"Yes, and I know this is probably upsetting to you and shocking and hurtful but just know that I did think long and hard about not involving myself with him because of you but it seems my reckless danger loving genes just kicked into overdrive and I found myself going there."

"There?"

"You really should sit back down. You seem to be shocked."

Sam nibbled her bottom lip. "Wow. Huh. You and Jason....huh."

"This will take time to get used to. I'm going to leave now. Just, please, remember that you come first for me...my daughters come first...always, forever. And Nikolas and Spencer, of course. My family. You mean the whole world to me. The whole world." Alexis headed for the door.

She pulled it open.

"Mom."

Alexis froze. She slowly turned around.

Sam said "Okay, I'm surprised and it is kinda weird but no weirder than when I found out you were my mother and we had both been with Sonny. Its just....I didn't see this coming because you always had such a problem with Jason."

"Not with Jason, per se. With you and Jason as a couple because I was afraid for you."

"And you're not afraid for yourself?"

"Not physically afraid. I've been a mob target since everyone found out Sonny fathered Kristina."

"Right. Okay."

"Take time to think about this, digest it, sit with it for a while and then phone me."

"It will take time to get used to. To wrap my mind around but," she blew a long breath out, making her high fly away from her face, "I love you. You're my Mom. I'm not mad. I just want you happy."

"You don't have to push aside your anger for me. In fact, please don't, because I don't want it to come out later and be worse."

Sam smiled. "Seriously, I'm okay. You and Jason...huh...weird. But I'm married." Sam showed off her ring. "And I haven't been with Jason in years. I let that go a long time ago. I love my husband." She smiled widely, like she always did when talking about Max. Like she was amazed over him. Like they shared a deep secret about how good they were together- how magical, how special, how perfect.

Alexis finally relaxed. "Whew. I was sure you'd hate this."

"Nope. Its strange but like when aren't we strange, right?"

"Right!"

Sam chuckled.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Mercedes."

The nanny turned around in the nursery. "Oh, hello, Jason."

"How is he?"

Matthew Jason Jacks was just a month and a half old. He lay in his bassinet.

"He's doing great today."

"Where's Carly?"

"She had a doctor's appointment. She should be home soon." Mercedes walked toward the door. "Do you want to wait with M.J?"

"Sure."

Mercedes left. Jason walked over and looked down at his godson. His eyes settled on the perfect child that always made his heart ache in joy and pain. "Hey, little boy."

Jason picked him up. He patted his back. It felt so right to hold a baby in his arms. He couldn't keep the grin off his lips.

He walked near the window and started talking to M.J. "I heard you were having trouble sleeping for a while there. You need your rest. You can't keep your mom up all night. Your little brothers both went through croup too. It's tough, I know. But you're past it now." He kept talking and talking to him, because this was the only time he would have with the child for who knows how long. He wanted them to bond. Plus his voice soothed the baby. It was the vibrations of his chest that did the trick. As long as Jason talked while M.J. was laying against his chest the baby cooed happily.

Eventually Carly came strolling into the room. "Hey!" She smiled widely. "What are you doing here?" She walked over and kissed the baby's head. "Mommy's home. Not like you missed me, did you? Nope. Not when Uncle Jason is around."

"Hey." He passed her the baby. "I just wanted to talk to you real quick. I actually need to get to a meeting. I didn't realize you had a doctor's appointment today."

"It was just routine follow up after delivery. I'm perfectly healthy."

"Good."

"So, what do you need to talk about?"

Jason let out a short breath. "I need a favor, Carly."

"Sure."

"Don't answer so quick. Wait till you hear what it is."

"What's wrong? Is something wrong?"

"No." He touched her arm. "Nothing's wrong."

"Well something is up." She lay her son in his bed.

Jason moved back from her. He rolled his head on his neck.

Carly tensed. "Liz! Please tell me you did not give her a ring this time. Anything but that. Anything! Seriously!"

"Stop!"

"Oh my God! You can't actually be going back to her after everything that happened. What you need to do is get her to sign a custody agreement and then kick her back out on the street where she-"

"Enough!"

"I'm surprised you're actually standing here telling me. Isn't it your style to hide it for a few years?"

His eyes held hers for a long moment.

Carly relaxed. She backed down. "I'm sorry. Its just I care so much about you and she's so wrong for you. I didn't mean to say it that way, Jase."

"You're upsetting yourself and its not healthy for you. Plus M.J. doesn't need to hear this. Lets go downstairs."

Carly followed him to the living room. She asked "How did she trick you into doing her this time? I'm just curious!"

"I'm not involved in any way with Liz. So leave her out of this."

"Oh."

Jason sucked a breath through his nose and let it out his mouth. He spit out "I'm dating Alexis. There. You know. Bye."

He headed for the door.

"ALEXIS!"

Jason turned around. "Be calm! Come on. You can't let your blood pressure get out of control, Carly!"

"Okay," she said, calmly. "Okay. I'm fine."

"I have to work."

"But-!"

"I have to go." He walked through the foyer.

"But! I want details. How did this happen? Who made a move first? Her, right? Of course she did. I mean look at you."

Letting out a frustrated breath he turned around, only then realizing that in his haste to leave and not face talking to her about this, he forgot something. "The favor I need is for you to be nice to her."

Carly screwed up her face. "In nearly twenty years I've never been nice to her. That's asking a lot."

"Be serious."

"She's seriously has a stick stuck up her butt and thinks she's better than me. A better mom. A better career woman. A better dresser. But she's wrong on every count and it burns her up because really deep down she knows that my trailer park roots are putting to shame her royal behind."

Shaking his head wearily Jason said "Just get along. Do not harass her over this."

"I want to know how you hooked up!" Carly whined, with a teasing smile.

"Will you do this for me? Can you handle this?"

"I can do anything for you, you know that, Jase."

"Okay. Good." He kissed her cheek. "Thanks."

He pulled open the front door.

Carly cried "Sam! Oh my God! What does she think about this? Come on. You can't just leave me hear without any of the gossip. This is like taking me to a movie and making us walk out halfway through. You can't just say you are sleeping with neurotic Alexis hands off Davis and then just run out of here."

"Bye!"

Carly let out a huge breath as Jason headed for his SUV. She called out, while freezing cold December air hit her, "She better be good to you or else!"

Jason got in his SUV, waited for her to go inside, and then left. He was a lot less tense after getting that out of the way and because he got to see M.J. but he was far from feeling good. Carly would keep her nose in this, that was for sure, and nothing would keep her from having an opinion about everything that went down between him and Alexis. He knew Carly loved him and that was why she cared. If Jason stayed honest with her they would be okay.

But it was hard to be completely honest with himself. Hard to not get upset when he held M.J. and it felt so right.

He ached over his own sons. For lost time with Michael and Jake. Michael he at least got to be close with, in a different way than being his father but they were close. Jake was just a picture and a few stolen glances every now and then.

Jason knew he didn't deserve to raise a child. It wasn't safe. He made his life this mess and he had to live with that.

It still hurt.

Carly took the news like he expected. She didn't cause him any pain today. He caused it all for himself this time.


	82. Heat, 16

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Sixteen**

**December 10th****, 2009**

**Thursday**

Alexis was in her office, feeling pretty good about the fact that she had told Sam she was dating Jason, when she opened her purse, took out her birth control, like she did everyday at lunch time, and went to take a pill.

That's when she noticed she had skipped yesterday's dose.

One missed pill couldn't be that big of a disaster. Except she had unprotected sex the day before. She could always take two pills now. Or go see Kelly and get the morning after pills.

She let out a long breath.

This was probably not a big deal.

Alexis jerked the phone off its base and dialed. "Diane! Get over here! I can't get knocked up by another mobster!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

After a long ranting session with her friend, Alexis found herself at Jason's door. The guard that stood there opened it and let her in, while saying, "Ms. Davis."

Jason was sitting at his desk, looking stressed out, working on paperwork. He stood up, surprised to see her. "Hey."

"Tell me you don't want to have a baby."

His mouth slightly opened. "What?"

Her hands flew all around. "You don't want to have a child, right? I just need to hear you say that and then you can get back to your work and I can go back to my office and life can go back to normal without me wasting away my day considering options when really there is only one, in a situation like this."

"Slow down. Back up. What situation?"

"I forgot to take a couple of birth control pills. Yesterday's and I also forgot one last week but it didn't seem like an issue then. Now I see that it could be. I'm sorry for reassuring you last night when I only just realized this morning my lapse in remembering in a timely fashion. But this is not a big problem. All I need to do is go to Dr. Lee and get a dosage of emergency back-up contraception. Though it is my choice and my body.....I thought maybe it would be prudent to run this by you because I've done this kind of thing before...well not this thing but similar....trying to take matters when it comes to my kids in my hands alone and it hasn't worked well for me. Not that we share a kid. We do not and we won't, for certain, as long as I take the morning after pill. I don't mean to bother you with this, Jason. I really don't. Just say you don't want a kid, so I don't feel like somehow I cheated you out of your choice, and then I'll be out of your hair."

"This is your call. Not mine."

"Are you mad?"

"No."

"You seem mad. I know what I said last night-"

"I'm not mad."

"But I forgot. Its happens. If you knew how busy my day is and how tough it is to start up this new law firm with my compromised reputation and then there is raising Molly and Kristina and dealing with a no-neck mob solider calling me Mom and I even had to tell my eldest today that I am engaging in intercourse with her ex-lover. I have a packed schedule, to put it mildly."

"I'm not blaming you for anything."

"I shouldn't have told you this. This is a mood killer. I don't know why I'm here. I'm going to go straight to General Hospital and deal with this. Its not a big deal, seriously. I have no moral objections to it and find it silly, actually, anyone who does because it is far from an abortion. And, as far as woman's rights issues go, I am firmly pro-choice. Sonny isn't but that's only because he is a man and thinks like a man. He doesn't understand that not everybody is always capable of raising a baby at all times. I do. I had to give up Sam so the issue is quite close to my heart, actually." She headed for the door. "I'm leaving. Good bye. Sorry for disturbing your day."

"Alexis."

She looked back at him.

Jason said "Sit down for a sec, okay?"

She slowly walked to the couch. She still wore her wool coat and carried her brief case. She sat down. Jason sat next to her.

She said "I'm sorry. Again. So sorry. This is the last thing you want to think about, I know. I just hope you don' t let it affect us the next time we...."

"Stop apologizing. You did nothing wrong. Everyone forgets something sometime."

"I don't know why I wanted to tell you this. Its really quite bizarre. Its just...well....fair is fair, right? You were there and so was I so I guess we both should be aware of what happens next. I know what I want but I just want to make sure you want the same thing."

Alexis had spoken to Jason several times about putting Jake in his will. She knew the pain he carried over not being around his son. She couldn't live with herself if she cheated him out of another child. They probably had not created one but it wasn't fair to do that to him.

She believed he had decided to not ever bring another child into his life- which was smart- but a part of her also thought he deeply regretted not having a child.

He said "You want to take the pills then?"

"Logically, yes. Emotionally....not so much."

"Okay. So what part of you are you listening to right now?"

"I know I should just take the pills- its not a big deal, like I said- but I want to just let God decide. Because, well, after Molly was born I really didn't consider, that often, having more kids because my life was so busy and I was never in a half way decent relationship but today, as I think about this, I know that my baby having days are just about over and so....why not just see how this plays out. It probably won't come to be anything and that would be the simplest outcome. The one that keeps our lives easiest."

"Would you want to have my baby?"

"It wouldn't be any crazier than anything I've done in the past."

"Do you want a baby or not?"

"I don't want...want... a baby but I don't want to do anything to change the course of what already is done. Though I honestly don't think we created a baby. Its just...in case....we did I can't decide this without your input. It would make the most sense to go get those pills but it doesn't sit right with me. So I know how I feel....how do you feel?"

"You need to decide this. You would be the mother. Its your choice."

"Just tell me.....is it okay with you if I don't take the pills?"

"Yes."

"Does this make you want to buy thousands of condoms and stuff them in all your pockets?"

He chuckled. And then this grin curved his lips. He was so happy. Alexis really- as insane as it might sound- wanted to give him a child in that moment. So he would always be that happy.

Neither of them were the type to plan to bring a baby into the mob lifestyle though so if she wasn't pregnant then that was that. They were just sleeping together and enjoying each other, not crazy in love, so they wouldn't be planning to create a family.

Still it brought a small smile to her lips to know that if she accidently got pregnant she'd have this man who really loved kids as the father of her youngest. And she'd have a chance to hold a little baby again and whisper "I'll be a good Mom for you," one more time. A chance to try again.

It was so hard on some days with Sam and Kristina. They were both rebellious and both emotional. Though they made her so proud and happy, it hurt to know they needed her less and less as everyday went by. Molly would soon be a teenager and she'd be the same way.

Alexis knew she shouldn't want another child. But a very small part of her was screaming that this was her last chance to have one and not to do anything to destroy that chance.

Jason didn't answer her about the condoms. He just leaned over and kissed her. Her hand rose and caressed his cheek. "Minty," she said with a smile.

"Thanks for talking to me about this. For not shutting me out."

"You sure you're okay? Not turned off?"

He yanked her onto his lap, so she straddled him, and then undid the belt on her wool jacket, pushing it off her. His mouth went to her neck.

Alexis laughed. "I guess that answers that question."

Heat rushed through her body as he sucked on her neck. Her skirt was riding up on his thighs, and her center was pressed against the bulge in his jeans. She started to unbutton her shirt and then shrugged out of it. His mouth closed around one nipple.

"Ohhhhh, Jason!"

He ripped violently at her bra and tossed it away from her.

She didn't waste time thinking about how much it cost because all she cared about was him sucking her nipples. One hand massaged her breast while his mouth licked and sucked at the other until she was squirming and moaning. Alexis pulled back from Jason and stood up. She stripped off her pantyhose and underwear while he pulled out his dick.

Alexis put one foot on the couch, taking him in her hand she stroked him for a minute and then teased her own slit with his dick. "Yes or no? Whatever you want."

"Hell yes."

She led him inside of her and settled on his lap, letting out a long, body shaking, moan at the intensity of what they were doing. She didn't come here for this but her emotions got the best of her.

Jason grabbed her hips and they started a rhythm. He was moaning more than usual and she wondered if this got him hotter...knowing she would have his baby and be happy about it. She could tell herself 1,000 reasons to never ever have a baby with a mob hitman but she was deep in this lifestyle- no way out now- and deep down she was just a woman. Her maternal cravings ran deep. Her soul ached for children to love and care for and her soul overruled her brain in this instance.

Besides, she was pretty sure, nothing would come of this anyway. She was now past prime baby making age. So she could let herself have this. This intense, emotional, desperate, deep, good love making with Jason where they fantasized about creating life.

When he came she felt her body warm with his cum. Her walls clutched him and she screamed out his name "JASON! OH FUCK! FUCK ME! OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Uhhhhhhhh, God, Alexis."

She collapsed against him. He rolled her over so she was laying down, while they were still connected, and he was over her. After catching their breaths she said "We're being so reckless." She gave him a smile.

He kissed her sensually and said, as he stayed buried deep in her, "This was the best....for me."

She played with his hair. "That's saying something...after Aruba."

"Second thoughts?"

"Not a one. Except.....that door over there isn't locked."

"Rico knows better than to let anyone in if I'm with someone."

"I should hope so."

Jason kissed her shoulder.

Alexis said "Lets also hope Rico is hard of hearing and discreet."

Jason looked into her eyes. She gave him a soft kiss.

He said "You always surprise me."

"Well, what did you expect? Me to bore you?"

"You don't. You make my life a hell of a lot better."

She smiled slightly. "That's good to hear." Her hands went to his ass and massaged it. "You make me feel young again. Not that I'm saying I'm old. I'm not that old. You know what I mean... you make me feel vibrant again.. My life was pretty dull before your murder case....well except for the whole affair in the newspapers lie thing. What I'm saying is....I'm enjoying your company."

"Good."

He started kissing her for long minutes until he got hard again and then he made love to her another time, going slower. It was their slowest, sweetest love making session yet. She was arching her back, panting, and digging her heels into his back by the time he started to come. By then she had no doubts at all, it made him hot to think about baby making with her.

And that made her tingle from head to toe.

They probably would not conceive, no matter how many times they had unprotected sex, but it was deliciously sensual to know they could be creating a miracle baby. The miracle would be that just a week ago neither had any hope of ever having another child again.


	83. Heat, 17

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Seventeen**

**December 10****th****, 2009**

**Thursday**

Jason stepped out of the shower. He had just taken Alexis from behind with her breasts pressed against the glass in his steam shower. He dried off and then he dried her off. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he left the room. When he came back he had a t-shirt. He handed it to her to put on.

She said "I should probably go back to work. I have research to do."

"Your kids will be home from school in a couple hours. Why not get a nap in before then?"

"Smart thinking. They do require lots of energy. Making dinner for me is an exhaustive endeavor in itself. But I refuse to give up on my culinary pursuits. Each year I get a little better. Kristina is almost in college and I can almost make a whole meal without using anything out of a box."

He slipped on some boxers and took her hand. They went into his bedroom and lay down. He spooned her.

Over the last few months his feelings for her were growing and growing. He kept seeing her in a new light, time after time, ever since she became his defense attorney. Today really kicked his emotions into high gear over Alexis though.

She told him that she wouldn't mind having a baby with him. Not that she wanted to try but that she wouldn't be upset if it happened. She longed for another child and if they were blessed with one she'd be okay with that.

His pain over not being able to raise Jake was so deep that Jason didn't think he'd ever heal from it. Yet Alexis had given him a little hope.

It was wrong to pray to bring a new life into the mob world they lived in- the lifestyle that hurt Michael, Morgan, Kristina, Molly and Jake- but Jason could not deny that the only way his heart would ever feel whole is if he could have a baby that he finally did not have to walk away from. His baby he could raise and hear call him "Daddy," for more than just a few precious years. Forever.

It was wrong to hope he got her pregnant today. And tomorrow he vowed to go back to condoms. But today had been theirs to dream. For a man who hated to think about what might be, it really had been just what he needed.

Just one day of dreaming about sharing a baby with a good woman who would be happy to mother his kid. It was beautiful for him. As he held her now he wondered if she was falling in love with him the same way that he was falling hard for her.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"Girls," Alexis said, as she sat on the couch with Molly and Kristina that night "I need to tell you both something. Jason is going to be coming around more often now."

Kristina asked "He's in trouble again? He just beat a murder rap. You're going to make a fortune being his attorney at this rate."

"Well, yes, I'm sure I will but he won't be visiting for work related reasons. It will be for personal ones. I want you both aware of this and okay with it. Because your happiness matters most to me."

"EW!" Kristina said "Gross! You're dating Jason?"

Molly's eyes widened. "Whoa. What does Dad say and Uncle Sonny? Dad hates Jason and Jason is Uncle Sonny's good friend. So I bet they both have opinions, right?"

"Right. But their opinions don't matter, sweetie. Its just what my girls think that matter."

Kristina said, as she shivered in disgust, "Yuck! That's what I think. He used to date Sam!"

"Your sister is fine with this."

"Whatever. I say its weird but whatever. If you want to date Jason go for it. I have homework to do." Kristina left the room.

Alexis called after her but she didn't come back. Letting out a sigh, Alexis looked at Molly. "I know this is weird, like Kristina said, but Sam is married to Max. She doesn't have romantic feelings anymore for Jason. I'm not hurting Sam. I would never do that to her."

"If Sam's okay with this then I'm okay." Molly really admired her eldest sister. "Kristina will come around. I just want to know what Dad said. Did he yell?"

"Your father is currently unaware but its not a secret. He's just busy raising Jackson right now. I'll inform him in due time."

Claudia and Ric had named their son John Jackson Lansing. The baby went by his middle name. Claudia died in child birth, leaving Ric to care for his son alone.

Alexis went on "I know I haven't dated in a while but I want to assure you that you will spend as much time with me as you ever did, okay?"

"Okay, Mom."

"Hungry? Lets go try and make some pasta."

"Or we could order in."

"I don't think you girls enjoy my dinner making attempts. But too bad. I'm not admitting defeat yet."

Molly followed her Mom in the kitchen and they made some pasta, then dumped sauce from a jar over it, and added Parmesan cheese.

Kristina came out for dinner. "I only have one thing to say about this Jason thing. Please don't end up on the internet this time."

"I don't intend to."

"Good."

"I expect you to be polite to Jason when he comes over."

"Sure. Whatever. I'm always nice."

Alexis gave him a long look.

Kristina said "Fine! I'll be nicer. But, keep in mind, if you kiss him in front of me....I will go blind."

Alexis chuckled. "I will keep that under advisement."

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

At around ten pm Jason called Alexis, just like he had the night before. She was alone in her bedroom, watching reruns of Grey's Anatomy that she had on DVR.

"Hello, Mr. Morgan."

He chuckled.

She went on "Are you in the custody of the police again and requiring my legal services to save you from a justly deserved prison sentence?"

"Not this time."

"Good. Because I'm already dressed for bed. So how are you doing tonight?"

"Okay."

"To what do I owe this honor of a late night phone call? Looking for company in your coffee shop another time? Because, I have to warn you, I was earlier with this man who was left me rather sore. I could attempt to be a trooper for you though, I suppose."

He chuckled again. "I got to deal with a shipment later. I just wanted to say good night to you."

She smiled softly. "Well that is considerate of you. I did not realize we were at this stage. Good to learn."

"Good?"

"Yes."

"Good."

"Be careful when you're law breaking this evening. I am growing rather attached to certain parts of your anatomy and I don't think they allow conjugal visits for attorney and clients. In fact, I'm sure that is expressly forbidden, which is quite a shame actually. We'll just have to keep you out of lock up so it doesn't become an issue."

"Sounds like a plan."

"Guess what? I managed to tell all three of my girls about you and I today. We are out of the closet!"

Alexis had left his apartment while he was still sleeping earlier so she hadn't gotten to talk to him after they made love three times, showered, and napped together.

"What did Sam say?"

"She was shocked and flummoxed but, after a minute or two, she said she was happy for me."

"Good."

"Kristina was less than enthused though. Just so you know, you are not only old but gross and weird in her eyes. Well actually the idea of me and you is the gross and weird part."

"She'll come around."

"Molly was most interested in learning what Ric and Sonny have to say about it. Probably because she always wanted me back with her Dad and she's now so close with Sonny. But she adjusted quickly to the idea of you and me. I think she just really misses a man around here."

"I told Carly today that we're gonna date."

"Carly!" Alexis bounded up. She flipped off McDreamy and McSteamy in the middle of their scene at the bar. "You should have warned me! You know I need a warning when it comes to that woman. I haven't even been looking over my shoulder at all today."

"She's not going to bother you."

"Ha! Mark my words, a restraining order is in her future."

"No. It will be fine. She's fine with this."

"Fine! Ha! HA! HA! She's never fine with you sleeping with someone not named Carly."

"Yeah she is. She's good with this. Trust me. I know her."

Alexis lay back down. "I do trust you. I hope you know that by now."

"Its been a good week."

"Yes, a really good week for us but I trust you because I've known you since Michael was a baby. I know your limits and your lines. They're a lot like mine."

After a long pause his voice dropped low "Today meant a lot to me."

"To me too."

"You wanna go out to dinner tomorrow?"

"A real date. Hmmm. How pedestrian."

He chuckled.

Alexis said "That sounds lovely."

"Okay. So what time is good for you?"

"We could meet at the Cosmopolitan at eight, if that's good for you. Not the Metro Court. Because until I see Carly with my own eyes and see there is no crazy scheme lurking in her baby blues....I'm going to be unable to relax anywhere that could be in proximity to her."

"The Cosmo at eight. Got it."

"See you then, Mr. Morgan."

He chuckled and said "Bye."

She lay in bed, feeling warmth spread through her because it always made her feel good to know she was making him happy. It was powerful and intoxicating. Especially since she had seen him struggle with pain, depression and grief time and again in his life. But as long as they were dating he wouldn't be alone with his emotions- good or bad- because she'd be by his side helping to make it all better for him.

A partner. That is what he was becoming for her. She rarely, if ever, really let a man be that for her. But she was older, wiser, and ready now to let down that wall. And, most of all, she loved Jason's grin.

Other women swooned for his eyes. For Alexis it was that little sly grin of his that made her heart melt.


	84. Heat, 18

**Heat**

**Jason Morgan and Alexis Davis, canon**

**Chapter Eighteen**

**December 11th, 2009**

**Friday**

After they had dinner at the Cosmopolitan, Alexis pulled a room key out of her clutch purse. She smiled and held it up. "Could I persuade you?"

Jason's eyes filled with hunger. He nodded, just once. Throwing two hundred dollars on the table, he stood up and took her hand. He was wearing a suit. She had on a dark blue dress that was sexy as hell. Ever since he walked in and saw it on her he had been wanting to take it off her.

They walked into the elevator. She pressed a button for the floor where she rented a room. As they rode up, their eyes held each other's.

He really loved how beautiful she was. She was stunning. There was something very reserved about her but when she let loose it was fantastic. It felt like Jason knew her in a way she didn't let anyone else know her- at least not anymore. The sexual tension grew as they got off the elevator at the Penthouse floor and went to the suite she rented.

Alexis opened the door. "I can't spend the night because I need to get home to my girls and be there when they wake up. But Voila is staying till Molly is asleep and Kristina is in the house for the night. So we have some time."

Jason looked around the room. He walked over to a built in stereo, near they television, and started some music. He changed the station until it was something out a short breath he walked back to Alexis and pulled her into his arms.

She gave him a wide smile and then said "I have heard that you despise dancing."

"One dance."

She rested her head on his shoulder. "Then I better make the most of this."

As the song ended he threaded his fingers through her hair on both sides of her head, and then gave her a long, tongue tangling sensual kiss. They had gotten further in a week then he thought they would but he felt like they were in a good place now. They were getting on the same page more and more each day. It helped to relax him. Made him think they'd last another day, week, month and maybe even years. He lived minute by minute- so he wasn't planning out their future- but still he didn't want to worry that she was about to bolt from him.

After yesterday he didn't worry about that anymore. She bared her soul to him when she said she sometimes wanted just one more baby. And that she'd share that baby with him if by some twist of fate she ended up pregnant.

He didn't expect that to happen but knowing she would be okay with it really opened his heart the rest of the way to Alexis.

Breaking their kiss he turned her around and unzipped her dress. Bending he kissed her shoulders and then down her back, as he pulled the dress to the floor. She stepped out of it. She wore a garter belt that night. Jason always got hard at the sight of those. A low moan rumbled out of the back of his throat as he stood back up. He ran his hand up the inside of her leg and between her legs, cupping her. He nipped at her earlobes.

"You so damn hot, Alexis. Fucking hot as hell." He rubbed his hand against her underwear. "You make it so I can't concentrate around you. All I can do is think about this..." he slipped a finger beneath her underwear "how fucking dripping wet you get over me."

Three fingers drove into her while his other arm wrapped around her waist, to hold her up when her legs started to tremble and shake as her orgasm ripped through her body. It only took a few minutes for her to come. By that time they were both flushed and ready for more. He lay her on the bed and stripped out of his clothes. Jason grabbed his wallet and took out a condom then he crawled onto the bed and over Alexis, who had stripped naked.

Her eyes were wide as they searched whispered in her ear, as his dick pressed against her leg, "I want you to have my baby but I can't keep acting like the danger isn't real, okay?"

Her hand caressed his cheek. "Its very real but its all we know now."J

ason kissed the skin right under her ear, as he shivered. "Maybe we'll both get what we want. Just know that even if we don't......yesterday was amazing for me. I'll always remember that."

She swallowed loudly. There were slight traces of tears shimmering in the brown depths of her eyes. He kissed at under her eyes and then her forehead. Alexis told him, tearfully, "Being logical is a bummer."But he knew that logic was what she lived by. Its just that emotions overtook them before. Now they had to be smart. Think about reality. He couldn't try and get her pregnant again and again because it wouldn't be right. They had their one day of forgetting who they were and what they could really have, now they had to go back to being mature hurt. It really cut deep because he wanted to keep his hope, keep their deep connection they had when they were making love without a condom, keep that level of intimacy, but Jason was just too set in his ways to do ran her hand slowly over his back, in a soothing motion.

After a long moment, while he was kissing her throat, she said "I understand. I feel the same way. Its best to be cautious. I've spent a more than a decade protecting my girls from the danger of the mob lifestyle...its just....I'm in this no matter what and so are my kids....and I just want the happiest life we can all have. Sue me. I still want to work the system to my benefit. Its all I know. And if you're with me....I want to give you all I can. Nothing lasts forever but we could have this wonderful right now."

He slipped the condom on. "We are."

She nodded. They made teary, emotional love to each other. He marveled at how raw she seemed to be with him on this night. The day before had broken some barriers for them. They were closer than ever now.

XXXXXXXXX

Alexis lounged in a bubble bath in the hotel suite. She had a glass of wine she was sipping.

Laying her head back she closed her eyes._What am I doing with Jason?_ she asked herself _One minute I'm sure I need to take those morning after pills and then I look into his eyes and he so wanted a baby....it made me ache for his baby...made me remember all the times I told myself I couldn't ever have another child...not to dream about a son. And then I was telling him how I wanted to let fate decided. FATE! We are letting fate decide this now because Jason is backing out on trying again. Which makes sense. I mean I was the first one who only wanted sex from him....and the sex is amazing and if that's all we get then good. I don't need love or another baby or fairytales_.

She kept soaking there as she tried to tell herself that she wasn't sad or empty inside now. But, just a little bit, she was.

She knew that it was pure madness to contemplate baby making with a hitman but this was the world she lived in. No matter what she'd always have gaurds and all her kids would be targets. She hated it but it was true. Because of that, and the fact she never had good and steady relationships with men, she told herself to give up on the idea of bringing another life into her world. But then, after forgetting to take a few pills and one intense encounter in the bathroom at the coffee shop, all she thought couldn't ever be hers was dangled in front of her eyes.

She ignored it at first....though it teased her like a siren's call....till she looked in Jason's eyes and then Alexis knew....she couldn't take any sort of emergency contraceptive. Jason deserved his chance to see if God would give him a baby he could raise and Alexis decided to give herself permission to go for her dream.

A little boy to love.

But it had been foolish, crazy, reckless, wrong. Still it felt so beautiful and right. Story of her life. When would she ever learn to not do the most insane thing she could because she was in love with a dangerous, intense, gorgeous man?

Her eyes popped open.

_In love_? she thought._ I truly hope I am not setting myself up for heartbreak here. It doesn't feel that way though. It feels like Jason wants all I want. And what I want is more of us. More of feeling understood and cherished. More wild sex and sweet love making. More fun. More laughs. More living life to its fullest without apologies or stopping short_.

Maybe that is what upset her about Jason using a condom- not just that their awesome, secret, rule breaking, baby making scheme was so abruptly over- but that Jason pulled back from the edge. She always did that before she met him. When it came to him though she was starting to like the edge. Like being crazy and bold and reaching for wanted him to feel as far gone as her. Unable to be rational and logical and smart. Just able to get lost in the sensations, dreams and the wild vibe they had together.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jason lay on the bed with his arms crossed behind his head when Alexis came out. He was still naked and covered by a sheet that rested low on his waist.

His eyes devoured her as she walked over to the bed and lay down with him. She curled against him and looked into his eyes. "Hello again."

"Hey."

"Do you have plans for Christmas, Jason?"

"Christmas day? I'll go see Carly and the boys and see Monica and Emily. Why?"

"I hoped that you'd help me make a traditional dinner for my girls. We always go to Wyndermere but this year I'm thinking maybe we should all be at my house. It would be a chance for everyone to get used to you being there with me....if you want."

The last piece of fear in his chest dissolved. He told her "Okay," and then started to kiss her. Jason slid her robe off her shoulder, kissing all the skin he exposed. Sucking on the clean, citrus tasting skin of her shoulder, collar bone and breasts. Then moving down to her stomach. He kissed it for a full minute- adoring her body, amazed by her was ready to truly let him all the way into her world.

Not only did she tell everyone they were together but now she would share her holiday with him, making them a couple. They were headed somewhere he used to wonder if they could ever get. He used to not know- when he was in lock up for three months- how far Alexis would let him get. A kiss? A night together? A week? Now they had all that and she wanted more. She even would hope for a baby. It was everything he needed to feel was couldn't imagine losing her kissed back up her body and captured her lips in a sensual kiss that was full of his growing love for Alexis.


End file.
